FabSwingers.com forum: Profile critique pt2... ish

By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

I'm offering my services.

There seems to be a few peeps wanting profile advice...now advice IS NOT what I'll give.

But what I will do is read between the lines and tell you how I interpret the words that perhaps aren't being said.

I'd only accept this offer if you've access to a bulletproof vest, because, well, I'm the cunt who says what others won't, and much of it isn't pretty.

Critique isn't really the right word, more me saying what I see. Sometimes I'll miss the mark in spectacular car crash fashion. I'm going off profile alone and not what I may already know about anyone.

I've still plenty to do from the last thread so if patience ain't yer thing.... grab a hankie.

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By *affron40Woman
over a year ago

manchester

Go for your life P!

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

go on then Peachy, do your worst for a fellow cunt

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't forget me please PP xx

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Amana:

Surfer chick

Has pissed herself laughing more than once.

Will look you dead in the eye and tell things straight without flinching.

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By *ancer36Woman
over a year ago

Stirling

Go for it

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By *imbobaMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

I’m up for a CCC. Car Crash Critique

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes please PP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Be kind lol x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Be gentle it’s been a tough week, emotionally and spiritually

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Mattb179

Growing in confidence. Can resemble an excited puppy and may tinkle on the floor if excited enough.

Appreciates salt of the earth people with a history behind them and story to tell.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well...do me, please...

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Sharedow:

He's mucking about on the forum!

Cheeky prankster.

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By *heMightySpud69Man
over a year ago

Milton keynes

I'm in, do your worst

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m in can’t get any worse I supose

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Jsm265:

you flip the bird and pull a face when someone you dislike leaves the room.

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By *uddly GoblinMan
over a year ago

Manchester

Could be interesting, feel free

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

DCi Luther:

Self assured. Much more and that self assurance would seem arrogant.

Wants acceptance

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Just me D:

A bit of a try hard but not in a cringey way, a pleaser.

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By *lice MaliceWoman
over a year ago

The Facility

""I'm in (pulls up big girl pants) "

"Mutual respect and trust is right high on your list of priorities.

Comfortable in own skin and unafraid of who you are. You like yourself.

Spiritualist"

Thank you, I've always wondered how my profile comes across and I'll take that happily

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By *aughty_tonyMan
over a year ago

King's Lynn

Im in, but im pants at writing profiles lol

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Kinkychick6969:

Works hard and this is your escape, but one that isn't essential for you.

You ain't here to wipe snotty noses and if you wanted a baby you'd get a puppy. Straight forward, tough love.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Kinkychick6969:

Works hard and this is your escape, but one that isn't essential for you.

You ain't here to wipe snotty noses and if you wanted a baby you'd get a puppy. Straight forward, tough love. "

Love it! Spot on. Thanks so much and thank you for doing this for everyone

.I think we all appreciate it xx

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Sam Tender:

Perfectionist tendencies, but not when it comes to other people. That's a finger you point firmly at yourself.

Piss taker, wants to have a laugh but has a sensitive side that is too hard on itself at times.

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By *oky99Couple
over a year ago

nodnoL

We’re in PP, thinking we need a profile overhaul ??

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By *uenevereWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

Go on.

Great thread and some good insight by the looks of it. I'm interested to see what you make of mine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hoping you'll still do me from the last thread PP

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Mr Tender:

Bugger all in the way of confidence. You just tend to roll with the punches and stay in the safe zone.

Need to have a read of the site FAQs. Half your text is taken up of waffle that's pure bollocks. Yep. The "IMPORTANT" bit.

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By *cb_zxyMan
over a year ago

London

Check mine out please. Thinking of rewriting soon

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

ABootyfulDay:

Quick note: 13th October pic. Thought your ponytail was a hairy muff and your boobs bum cheeks. I ain't got my glasses on tho. I'm too fucking lazy to go get them.

You ain't daft, but enjoy silliness between friends.

Still finding your "you-ness" as in who you are as a whole being.

Pissed off with dudes viewing you as a wet hole.

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Meet u at Joes:

Party animal. Not like a grizzly bear, more like a breakdancing zebra. Like to bring the joy, feel the joy.

Tells inappropriate jokes in select company

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By *manaWoman
over a year ago

Basingstoke

"Amana:

Surfer chick

Has pissed herself laughing more than once.

Will look you dead in the eye and tell things straight without flinching."

So true!!!

love it!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds like fun to me, count me in..

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Corisande:

Self deprecation if your defence mechanism, but also coz that shit's funny.

You buy thoughtful gifts for people you like, rather than gifting for the sake of it. Or at least you intend to but sometimes end up in the smellies aisle in Tesco.

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By *roubleInMindCouple
over a year ago

Greater Manchester

Could you do us please? Bullet proof vests at the ready

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By *etite_delightWoman
over a year ago

BunnyLand

would be an honour to hear your crashing thoughts

I’m in too!

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

Oh oh! Do me! Do me!

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Foam Shrimps:

If whoever wrote the profile hasn't worked in education or customer service I'll be shocked.

Has used up single guys who can't read tolerance, although it doesn't necessarily piss you off, but you laugh about it.

People taking the scenic route leave you with your head in hands and needing a shower.

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Cede:

I wouldn't want to be the twat that attempts to outsmart you. The predatory type that thinks "oh she's sub"....

Did the last one ever get his balls back?

100% believe there's far more to you than you allow people to see, something incredibly special.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m still in, if you have the energy left

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Sarah 123:

You know I'm laughing right?

If you were a character off the telly it would be "computer says no *cough*" but a fittie

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sharedow:

He's mucking about on the forum!

Cheeky prankster."

Thank you Princess. I like “cheeky.” Me to a tee.

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By *edeWoman
over a year ago

the abyss

"Cede:

I wouldn't want to be the twat that attempts to outsmart you. The predatory type that thinks "oh she's sub"....

Did the last one ever get his balls back?

100% believe there's far more to you than you allow people to see, something incredibly special."

Aww

But no - I've kept them in a jar to remind me never to get fooled again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Corisande:

Self deprecation if your defence mechanism, but also coz that shit's funny.

You buy thoughtful gifts for people you like, rather than gifting for the sake of it. Or at least you intend to but sometimes end up in the smellies aisle in Tesco.

Thank you - that’s made me think! Really appreciate the comments. Pretty accurate... except I’ll re-gift the smellies I’ve been given rather than buy more ...

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Rocket Queen:

I feel mean saying this, but you sound lonely.

Don't forget I could be totally projecting, although I don't think I'm lonely.

More to you than is normally seen. Escapism, a safe space.

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Simon Hyde:

Forum socials, if you haven't been you should.

One foot in, one foot out. Not feeling it but not not feeling it.

Meditation and self reflection

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

MisAventure69:

Self assured and happy with the soul and it's carriage when you look in the mirror. Hard worker.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Evening. I'm curious what are your thoughts xx

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Kissing Kelly:

A generally sweet person who doesn't want to upset anyone, but has limits and gets frustrated at times.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm ready to have my bubble burst op...

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By *stbury DavenportMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

I would very much like to be on the receiving end of this.

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Watch 56:

Here for couples. No hassle, no drama, not gonna spunk n run but won't outstay welcome either.

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Bellaseas:

Likes people to think for themselves. Tuned in to fine details.

Will take someone smart alongside a dash of x-factor to properly capture your interest

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Watch 56:

Here for couples. No hassle, no drama, not gonna spunk n run but won't outstay welcome either."

A fair summary... I survived! Thanks

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Morningstar:

Funny cocky not arsehole cocky. Not as confident as people may think.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ha ha jolly well go for it P

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

"Rocket Queen:

I feel mean saying this, but you sound lonely.

Don't forget I could be totally projecting, although I don't think I'm lonely.

More to you than is normally seen. Escapism, a safe space.

Oh jeez

to the lonely bit! I don't think I am. Thanks....I think

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Tartyanna16200:

Oh you have some stories to tell and some life lessons to teach.

Wishes you'd been at Woodstock.

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

"Rocket Queen:

I feel mean saying this, but you sound lonely.

Don't forget I could be totally projecting, although I don't think I'm lonely.

More to you than is normally seen. Escapism, a safe space.

Oh jeez

to the lonely bit! I don't think I am. Thanks....I think

I know! I felt like a right shit head but I wasn't gonna fib. I am getting tired too and not slept well the last 2 nights.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sarah 123:

You know I'm laughing right?

If you were a character off the telly it would be "computer says no *cough*" but a fittie "

Oh that's made me laugh

That's so me!! , and of course I'm a fittie

Thanks PP xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank you Princess Peach. So on the money.

(A bungee jump was on the cards before I made a bit of a mess of my back a good few years ago, still might ...)

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Jojo:

Mumsy. Not bad mumsy, cool mumsy. The type to dump a bottle of plonk in the punch.

Will make effort where the reward is either equal to or higher than what you invest, other than that it can kiss your backside

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm sure you have a list a mile long now, but I'm up for it if you've got the time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Go on then...

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Natalie-heaven:

Relaxed, world wise but can be too kind to the point there will be those that take advantage.

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Gbat:

Something seems off with your pics. Like they were taken many moons ago. I don't trust them.

Explorative as you begin to relax with who you are as you grow.

Still don't trust those pics *insert squint suspicious eye*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Natalie-heaven:

Relaxed, world wise but can be too kind to the point there will be those that take advantage. "

Awww thank you so much and yes I can be

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By *ear in the chairMan
over a year ago

yeah there

Go in then PP

Although most of the useful text currently mia

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sam Tender:

Perfectionist tendencies, but not when it comes to other people. That's a finger you point firmly at yourself.

Piss taker, wants to have a laugh but has a sensitive side that is too hard on itself at times. "

Scarily accurate.

Apart from the sensitivity thing.

I’m a rock, I don’t feel things!

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

PhoenixRaven:

Analytical mind, not intrusively but openly and in a way where you learn about the human, the experiences, what you can learn from others and self reflect.

Been stung and now doesn't do wasps and will certainly not be poking its nest.

A people person, but the right people. You feel them not physically but soulfully

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Sinderella:

You're getting one anyway, coz you're braver than you think.

You remind me of me. And that, as repetitive and flawed as it may be at times means you have a good heart, you're loyal and your comfort blanket can be an uncomfortable place at times but it has lessons hiding inside it. It's working out what those lessons are that's key.

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By *imon_hydeMan
over a year ago

Stockport

"Simon Hyde:

Forum socials, if you haven't been you should.

One foot in, one foot out. Not feeling it but not not feeling it.

Meditation and self reflection "

Medication and self reflection is easier '). Thank you PP, this is a lovely, giving thread x

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Invincible Girl:

Respectful with a strong moral code.

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

Ranger5891:

You come across as pleasant and laid back. Nothing stand out but nothing off putting

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes please OP

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By *isAdventure69Woman
over a year ago

Hampshire

Thank you PP , I feel I got off lightly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do me! Do me!

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

If you're not too tired Peach... do me please

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By *rincess peach OP Woman
over a year ago

shits creek

I'm gonna carry on tomorrow, I wasn't expecting such a big response and I really have been reading every profile, doing them in order and going with what the words say to me, putting aside any personal feelings or preconceptions based on forum interactions.

I started 11 hours ago

admittedly I've had a few hours doing other stuff.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm gonna carry on tomorrow, I wasn't expecting such a big response and I really have been reading every profile, doing them in order and going with what the words say to me, putting aside any personal feelings or preconceptions based on forum interactions.

I started 11 hours ago

admittedly I've had a few hours doing other stuff."

Goodnight Peach *waves*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I started 11 hours ago

admittedly I've had a few hours doing other stuff."

Aw bless you, sweet dreams!

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By *heonixRaven 777Woman
over a year ago

Guildford

"PhoenixRaven:

Analytical mind, not intrusively but openly and in a way where you learn about the human, the experiences, what you can learn from others and self reflect.

Been stung and now doesn't do wasps and will certainly not be poking its nest.

A people person, but the right people. You feel them not physically but soulfully "

Awe thank you kindly Princess Peach for taking the time to this, you have given your time and energy to so many of us today.

I do hope you have got something from it too.

You are correct, just missed the opinionated gob shite

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sinderella:

You're getting one anyway, coz you're braver than you think.

Aww we rock lovely xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do your worst

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By *heHookyMonsterMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

I'd really appreciate this! Please do when you can. Thank you! X

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By *itty9899Man
over a year ago

Craggy Island

Knock yourself out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I started 11 hours ago

admittedly I've had a few hours doing other stuff."

Have a good night xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Love you to do mine

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By *sm265Woman
over a year ago

Shangri-la

"Jsm265:

you flip the bird and pull a face when someone you dislike leaves the room."

Perfect!

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

Hey Pp you missed us out

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By *andyladMan
over a year ago

Hereorthere

Oh go on then I'll bite

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I will risk it! First time I have asked for advice! So good or bad, go for it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

please do give mine a look over

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you ever find some time

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