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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Not seen one of these threads up for a while. So lets see what story we can come up with.

It was a wet and windy night...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ust ClareTV/TS
over a year ago

Settlewick!

She should never have had that second tin of baked beans ...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *arlo82Couple
over a year ago

the gym and random places

And now as it squelched down her leg she stood gazing out the windows while washing the pot

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

Just hoping that the onion ring don't start repeating,

But it was worth it..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

She smiled to her self before squelching over to the fridge

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

By now her wellies were overflowing....she knew drastic action was called for as she flung open the fridge door.....

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *arlo82Couple
over a year ago

the gym and random places

Hunting maniacally for the loaf of bread

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By * Star FilthMan
over a year ago

staplehurst

Only to find a cucumber

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Smearing it with garlic butter and making it nice and crispy to lure

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So she could wipe her moist bum hole on a slice and make her unsuspecting husband a egg mayonnaise sandwich on the now brown bread that was white

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 23/09/19 22:44:42]

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Suspecting something was a miss, he gave the sandwich to the dog

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Suddenly she remembered she had to be up early for her shift in Gregg's sandwich factory...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 23/09/19 22:49:27]

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *arlo82Couple
over a year ago

the gym and random places

The poor dog rolled and whined. Running to the back door scrapping it and howling

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Where she fills the Greggs hot pocket pasties with her own brown chunky filling

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Provided by the dog who could not get out of the door

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asilForty77Man
over a year ago

a hundred and sixty of us living in a small shoebox in the middle of the road

Whilst robert mugabe was sitting in the corner getting high on wasbi

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Whilst robert mugabe was sitting in the corner getting high on wasbi"

Princess Anne was donning her leather outfit cracking her whip

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

And Prince Charles smiled gratefully, silently thankful that Camilla was tending to the horses.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"And Prince Charles smiled gratefully, silently thankful that Camilla was tending to the horses."

Before they all sat down to eat some duck and.....

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ylvie 888Woman
over a year ago

Cleethorpes


"And Prince Charles smiled gratefully, silently thankful that Camilla was tending to the horses.

Before they all sat down to eat some duck and....."

Suddenly in burst 6959ste announcing it is a wet and windy night!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

He was shocked to discover that nobody was interested in the weather.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *herryblossom_BJWoman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire


"He was shocked to discover that nobody was interested in the weather."

He was more interested in the wetness he desired in the bedroom ... Not outside

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

Oh I want the truth to be said

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

Princess Anne said she had a roll of roof felt in the car and some nails so she could fix the leaking bedroom roof.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

But after riding horses all day her thighs and bottom were very sore, so she phoned Bob the builder to see if he could fix it..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

He was busy with DIY but Wendy said she could pop round

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Wendy was very welcome to come round as she had a wonderful wand..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"Wendy was very welcome to come round as she had a wonderful wand.."

The wand was soo magic it could even fix....

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Brexit

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 24/09/19 19:19:57]

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"[Removed by poster at 24/09/19 19:19:57]"

Is never going to happen

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Brexit"

But alas the wand broke one night as Wendy in an act of passion...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch


"[Removed by poster at 24/09/19 19:19:57]

Is never going to happen"

as the power went out

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And it was jolly dark

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"And it was jolly dark "
So dark that it's time to build a log fire and sing...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The Birdie Song

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

meanwhile, at No33, an orgy was taking place involving Mrs Nunes, 4 Arab gentleman in traditional dress, a German Shepherd and...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The roly polys

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

are so big

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 24/09/19 19:48:23]

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That the little mice were frightened

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

by the thud of heavy feet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

that Mrs Nunes felt like a dung beetle, pushing a giant ball of shit up a steep hill... with the ball of shit becoming larger with every step.... how hard can it be too get double-anal and a good Arabic Kebab?

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ust ClareTV/TS
over a year ago

Settlewick!

Mrs Nunes mumbled to herself "Sysyphus never had to put up with this shit" as she rolled back down the hill and landed legs akimbo,anally impaled on an Arab erection

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

his erection thus spouted crude oil at 15cents a barrel less than iraq jumping jehoshaphat its armagedon

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Blissfully unaware of the armagedon the iraqi goat herders continued smoking their opium pipes while their goats...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Fucked Mrs Nunes

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Until they were hungry then carried on munching grass

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Mrs Nunes squirted so much the opium pipes were extinguished and the goat herders had to look for alternative entertainment

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

But the grass was green and down the road was Mary.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

And her little lamb...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

That fell prey to the rather stoned goat herders who had the munchies and wanted a lamb keebab..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

...with chips

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Proper chips not those french fries efforts

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

And proper Heinz tomato sauce, not Tesco special..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

Tesco sauce was off the menu so the server offered his own special sauce

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

Which was much more creamy..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

And contained much more protein.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

...and salt..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

Which played havoc with his genital warts.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

But he actually quite liked the discomfort

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

of wearing underwear dipped in treacle

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

And standing in front of a fire feeling it melt..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

and bringing some toast along to collect the residue

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

Treacle residue and man made fibres caused even more friction

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

...and chafing

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"...and chafing"

What shall we do about the chafing they said I know we will buy some......

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i have cream for that

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"i have cream for that "
Cream that eases

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

eases like a Sunday morning

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"eases like a Sunday morning "
Sunday a day of rest....

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford


"eases like a Sunday morning Sunday a day of rest...."

But not for the wicked....

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"eases like a Sunday morning Sunday a day of rest....

But not for the wicked.... "

So tonight we will wear our best.......... They said

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford


"eases like a Sunday morning Sunday a day of rest....

But not for the wicked.... So tonight we will wear our best.......... They said"

Knickers and we will go..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"eases like a Sunday morning Sunday a day of rest....

But not for the wicked.... So tonight we will wear our best.......... They said

Knickers and we will go.."

Looking for witches in the...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford


"eases like a Sunday morning Sunday a day of rest....

But not for the wicked.... So tonight we will wear our best.......... They said

Knickers and we will go..

Looking for witches in the..."

Supermarket,whilst we are...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

Shopping for soothing anti-chafing cream

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

But there was no anti chafing cream, so we bought..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

Lard

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"Lard"

Which didn't work so we tried

.........

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

The lard was hard and broke into shards

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


"Lard

Which didn't work so we tried

........."

WD40

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Which worked a treat as a lubricant but..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Made my nuts corrode

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rs Robinson no 1Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow


"Made my nuts corrode"

And my radiator dribble.....

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

My knob is stiff

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My knob is stiff "
door knob i hope

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

No. Radiator knob.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

heatings not needed

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

But as naturists the heating was on much earlier than in a clothed home.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rs Robinson no 1Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow


"But as naturists the heating was on much earlier than in a clothed home."

And we are so happy to be home, that dogging site was a.....

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Derelict pikey site..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rs Robinson no 1Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow


"Derelict pikey site.."

Cow pats everywhere....

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

That left a pungent odour that the doggers did not like..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i put clean socks on this morning

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton


"That left a pungent odour that the doggers did not like.."

But they put up with it as they weren’t ones to complain. Oh no.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Derelict pikey site..

Cow pats everywhere...."

omg in sainsburys

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rs Robinson no 1Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow


"Derelict pikey site..

Cow pats everywhere....omg in sainsburys "

That's why I'm a Lidl type of gal......check out the veg counter you should see the size of those.......

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Mouth watering melons,they are..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *revaunanceCouple
over a year ago

Exeter


"Mouth watering melons,they are.."

Round, firm, luscious, and tasty. Just like...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

You've always dreamed of but..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

Wait a minute..there's a ..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Whole lot of shaking going on..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

Come alonga baby..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

And wiggle it,just a little bit..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

It’s a no from all three judges.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

But wait..I have other talents....

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton


"But wait..I have other talents...."

What can you do with a cornflake box and a yard of sticky backed plastic?

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rs Robinson no 1Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow


"But wait..I have other talents....

What can you do with a cornflake box and a yard of sticky backed plastic?"

I would stick a cucumber......

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

Sideways

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rs Robinson no 1Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow


"Sideways "

In my bagette and ..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Smother it with special sauce

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"Smother it with special sauce"
the special sauce was made of....

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Flowers and plants

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

That could only be found after a long and enduring...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

...poo...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Following a hot, spicy curry

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

...and lager...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

Now I fancy a....

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"Now I fancy a...."
huge bowl of ice cream with...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ust ClareTV/TS
over a year ago

Settlewick!

Flaked armadillo shavings

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

...and a large glass of wine

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

And peanuts

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

...roasted...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rs Robinson no 1Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow


"And peanuts"

Oh yes peanuts.....peanut butter with Marmite on crusty bread with.....

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Bulls balls and Beetroot and a side order of..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *issButtonWoman
over a year ago

Nottinghamshire

Garlic bread but it’s a shame that...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rs Robinson no 1Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow

My meet has cancelled I'll just have to....

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

Slum it in here...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *issButtonWoman
over a year ago

Nottinghamshire

Although I could just...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

See if I could find...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ust ClareTV/TS
over a year ago

Settlewick!

Lord Lucan riding Shergar

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

They were in the area the other day, but now they have....

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Erectile dysfunction

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ust ClareTV/TS
over a year ago

Settlewick!

The horse doctor prescribed pills for Shergar but Lucan took them and now refers to himself as Lord Tripod

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *issButtonWoman
over a year ago

Nottinghamshire

But the pills wore off too soon...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

So they decided to eat some

..........

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Magic mushrooms..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Then started tripping

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"Magic mushrooms.."
Which made them see

....

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Huge wild bears ...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 28/09/19 04:17:49]

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Having a picnic..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"Having a picnic.."

And collecting...

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Having a picnic..

And collecting..."

Heads as if they were from Borneo..

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *rMister40Man
over a year ago

Kingston

Where Oreos are born

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Then suddenly one fine day

.....

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

It was a wet and cold night

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

in the gym so i wore pyjamas

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

But the fly hole was gaping

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

To reveal..

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

A pair of polyester Y-fronts

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

With Superman on the front...

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

And Spider-Man on the back.

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

But what was in the gusset...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

hes gay i know but loves Bareback webbing

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

With a Velcro rip-cord for ease of access.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

a barebacking parachuting spiderman

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

Who would meet a person like this?....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Who would meet a person like this?...."
superman

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"Who would meet a person like this?....superman "

Or a magic witch with a big....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Who would meet a person like this?....superman

Or a magic witch with a big...."

floppy stick........ yes can see it

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Drink this said the witch...

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

You will be under my spell and...

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

You will do exactly as I say

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"You will be under my spell and..."

Turn into a whistleandflute with no ears....

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

And no...

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"And no..."

Balls..... Then along came...

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

The Cadbury’s Caramel Bunny

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

[Removed by poster at 28/09/19 09:26:02]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

who will be obeyed cant agree on what colour to wear

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"The Cadbury’s Caramel Bunny "
Who melted near the open fire oooh I say said the....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

fire wasnt on

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"The Cadbury’s Caramel Bunny Who melted near the open fire oooh I say said the...."
huge Elephant in the corner The End.

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