FabSwingers.com forum: Doris & Ethel's Adventures #16

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

The never ending adventures of Doris, Ethel and Dave.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

This thread finds our heroes on a pensioners cruise in the Caribbean where they want to visit

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

The mountain of youth

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Where they could bathe in the eternal Spring and be young once more. But to get there they first had to

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Drink the potion which was guarded by the 7 headed snake called beejoo

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So our heroes bravely approached the snake, trembling as they did so...

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Beejoo became angry and

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Bit Ethel on the

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Ethel on the ankle the ankles swelled just like a balloon so Ethel

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So Ethel leapt onto Beejoo and started to wrestle him to the floor while Doris stood on his

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

On his 6th head the one with the long tongue

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

A very long tongue

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So Dave grabbed the tongue and wrapped it round a nearby

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Aircraft which happened to be hovering in the sky like a blue whale

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

The plane took off and the 7 headed monster went with it ! But now a new challenge faced our heroes....

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

When Bertha turned up

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Wearing a cowboy hat and toga. You shall not pass she roared !!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

And screamed

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Get back to Sunderland you old prunes ! The secret to eternal youth will never be your!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hahahahahaha

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Gagagaga said

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Ffs what we got ourselves into now

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

So Doris and Ethel decided 2 star in Hamlet so they needed

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

New outfits

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

And a new home

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

But then they remembered the Spring of Eternal Youth...

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

And sang we are the cheeky girls

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

But to finally reach the Spring they had to pass the Octopus of Doom !!!

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Named leoblooms

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

He had a fat head and eight long arms which he like to wrap around

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Yasmeen

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Only this time she got away as he was to slippy

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Yeah Said Ethel let's all

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Have a banana then suddenly out of the deep blue sea appear the Gorgon with big green eyes and yellow sharp teeth ready to

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Bite Doris on the bum unless Ethel could

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Could do a big fat fart

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

The fart had wings and flew to

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

The top of Dream Mountain, a magical world where anyone could

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Could be whatever they wanted to be they live the dreams

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Meanwhile the octopus of doom was cooking up a plan down under

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

With Magenta Devine the evil witch with a big nose

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

But she had fainted after Ethel's huge fart so Doris stepped forward to tackle the Octopus of Doom...

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

A fought the big fight and the winner was

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Was.....

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Ginderbinder

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Then Ethel and Doris

Were very tired so they had a nap and prepared for a finger buffet

Hurry said Ethel

Hyacinth is on her way...

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Miss

Bouquet

Arrived wearing a Gucci hat and

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

T-shirt with the slogan 'Hands up if you're horny'. Well said Doris..

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

How very dare you be horny you smelly

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Trout faced pile of donkey droppings, you're just a

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Snob who eats

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Stale toenails and mouldy cheese on toast with

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Snake eyes

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

That follow you round the room...

Look ! said Dave, here comes

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

The hoover

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

The side door opened to reveal

Bet lynch...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Wearing a leopardskin thong and a bowler hat. She was looking for

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Rita from the shop

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

But Rita was at a Swingers club in Stockport with Danny Dyer and Moira Stewart. They wanted to try out the

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

New slide in a swimming pool

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

But Dick Dastardly had filled the pool with mutant crabs and when Rita hit the water she

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Began to sing like a squirrel

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Stuck in a car wash. Doris came to the rescue by

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Showing her bloomers

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

To the crabs which confused them and they all ran up Ethel's

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Nose then bit her

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Leg

Meanwhile the sun was setting

A new bunch of people arrived including

Marge

Jarge and

Varge

They all loved

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Trifle and wrestling which they lived to combine by

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Eatung raw octopus

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

"Eatung raw octopus "

Eating

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Out of one of Dave's old shoes which he had

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Kept hidden in the

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Kitchen

It was the day of the fashion show

The fashion show was very

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Loud and scary. It was a Halloween special!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've always wondered with this thread have you two just been eating too many crayons or something to come up with this?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I've always wondered with this thread have you two just been eating too many crayons or something to come up with this?

Careful or you'll end up in one of the adventures

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Then dreamy eyes dressed up as a penguin to sing...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

God Save the Queen while doing the cha cha cha with Bradley Walsh and the ghost of

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Bette Davis

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

But Bette was jealous of Dreamy flirting with Dave and poured a jug of cold jelly on her head!

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Take that

Bette said

Then kicked her in the

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Bum bag. Which was full of loose change and

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Smelly socks

Bette said to dreamy

Have you seen

Joan Crawford recently

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Last time I saw her she was shopping in tesco

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Looking for wire coat hangers

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

To use as a TV aerial so she could receive porn stations from

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Erect Jim

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

So they all danced around the old campfire where the mushrooms used to grow and the muscles used to show

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And Mr Leo Blooms was wearing his best floral dress....

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

"And Mr Leo Blooms was wearing his best floral dress...."

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"And Mr Leo Blooms was wearing his best floral dress...."

Which Dreamy gave him for a Christmas present. He had given her a

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

"And Mr Leo Blooms was wearing his best floral dress....

Which Dreamy gave him for a Christmas present. He had given her a"

Black eye

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 16/10/21 16:27:00]

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"And Mr Leo Blooms was wearing his best floral dress....

Which Dreamy gave him for a Christmas present. He had given her a

Black eye"

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

"And Mr Leo Blooms was wearing his best floral dress....

Which Dreamy gave him for a Christmas present. He had given her a

Black eye

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"And Mr Leo Blooms was wearing his best floral dress....

Which Dreamy gave him for a Christmas present. He had given her a

Black eye"

But only in a gold gift case as she collected coloured eyes from around the world. Meanwhile....

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Dave was sat at the bar reminiscing about the time he....

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Wore a leopard skin bra

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

And was given the very important job of

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Showing them the

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

and pretended to be Kat from Eastenders while...

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

"and pretended to be Kat from Eastenders while... "

Bet Lynch to walk the Walk while she talk the talk

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

But no one could understand her as her mouth was full of

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

The people that the land had forgotten they will really really small

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

None of this making sense

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

"None of this making sense"

So try making it sense

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

I would if people carried on the sentences properly

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I would if people carried on the sentences properly"

Said Tom from the spice girls. It you wanna be my lover he sang...

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

And danced the night away before

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

The dawn broke and the sun rose over the beach in Rio de Janeiro. It was Carnival time !

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

And miss whiplash...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Arrived dressed in a thong and bananas. She said

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Hiya love how are your

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Plums. I saw them hanging down a couple of months ago and wondered if you'd picked them.

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

From aunty idas

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Who was on the phone to...

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Uncle bal raj Singh

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Then it's started to rain heavily

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

And Doris’s best hat was blown away to reveal

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Adventure because this is about adventures

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Which take place in a parallel universe called

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

I love Lavinia

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

In the meantime, Doris & Ethel had called a taxi and gone to...

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Tesco to get some bread and

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Sausages as it was Dave's Birthday and they always made him

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

A casserole in the

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Microwave oven they found in a rusty skip outside

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

So they started to dance like wild banshees

Chanting ooloo booloo

Ooloo booloo

Whist

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Playing strip poker under the table. Soon Ethel was only wearing her

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Woolly hat and a scarf

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

And a purple Basque which she had borrowed from

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

The local gorilla who loved shagging dogs

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

His name was Trevor and he lived next door to the

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Beekeeper who was

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

In a furious mood after someone stapled his balls to the

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Tree

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Of knowledge which grew out of

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

That guys ear

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

But Trevor the gorilla was really embarrassed about this purple basque as he had been forced to wear it as a dare and the dogs where now ignoring him

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

So trevor ran to

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

His mate to help him out of the bloody thing as he preferred to be naked

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

So then he scratched his head and said

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

My name is actually Damon Albarn, and I founded the Gorillaz...

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

With oasis we wat fish and

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

"With oasis we wat fish and"

Eat

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Then birth of a nation entered wearing a bright yellow dress and bongo balls she said hi Leo balloons I love you do you love me

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

And Leo turned into Stevie Wonder and said Do I Do, What, You Do, When I Do, My love for you...

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Is endless and

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

I’ll never sing again…I’m sick of this rain

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Where's the umbrella screeched

Ethel

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Oh no ! Dave has stuck it up his

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Loft

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Where he kept all his dark secrets and only brought them out at

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Christmas

With his special Christmas cake

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Made from rum, raisins, marzipan and

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Rats droppins

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Which Dave had collected over several years by

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Talking to them

Anyway said Ethel I have to get ready for the catwalk I will be wearing

Vivienne Westwood so I need to get a fitting in before

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I start farting again because this bleeding corset is too tight and I can't feel my

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Knees

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Which means I won't be able to dance the lambada tonight with

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Greta the better

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

So here I stand still waiting for the umbrella from the loft

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

So Ethel and Doris...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Decided they need a break from all this excitement and went to the bingo in Dudley instead.

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

And started to break dance

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean

"And started to break dance "

Everyone shouted , 'Shite dancing!' and Ethel began to cry .......

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

So a passer by Said hush hush sweet Ethel

Ethel dont you cry

Then....

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Leoblooms came in singing

Hold me hold me

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean

"Leoblooms came in singing

Hold me hold me "

So Yas held him until his eyes watered.. then he said .........

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Yo Doris, have you got any....

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Coconut milkshakes ? I like to rub them all over my

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Tits as it’s good for the skin but I need a Brolly forst

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Brolly forst was new drink made by

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Simon le Bon and Lilly Savage.

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