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Doris & Ethel's Adventures (Next Sentence)#5

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Gary put his wig on the lawn, and asked if one of the ladies had anything else for the other goalpost, so....

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By *leasebegentleCouple
over a year ago

Longfield

I’ll use my husbands urn said Doris always enjoyed abit of football.

Gary was…

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Happy with that

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

He asked "Does anyone fancy giving my lollypop a lick" ?

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By *ung fun walesMan
over a year ago

up the road

Ethel rushed forward to oblige but in doing so she Tripped on the wig and her false teeth came shooting out and

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Knocked over the urn of ashes which spilled out on to the grass. Gary offered an empty crisp packet to put them in. Doris said ...

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By *ung fun walesMan
over a year ago

up the road

[Removed by poster at 05/07/21 08:47:47]

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By *ung fun walesMan
over a year ago

up the road

It’s okay his ashes aren’t in there anymore I threw them out when I found out he had been on fab swingers without me knowing. These days I just uses the urn for

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

a Champagne flute to celebrate when I consumate my relationship with Gary. Gary quickly replied ...

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By *ung fun walesMan
over a year ago

up the road

I only meet Bi couples, you would have seen tat if you read my profile on

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

"But Doris and me ARE a bi couple" mumbled Doris, with her false teeth in her hand.

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By *ung fun walesMan
over a year ago

up the road

Garry swiftly replied i will need to see your verifications first

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By *leasebegentleCouple
over a year ago

Longfield

Well we don’t have any as we aren’t on Fab.

But if you’d like to watch us in action your more than welcome.

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By *ung fun walesMan
over a year ago

up the road

I would love to but i am running late , am about to film a new commercial for

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By *leasebegentleCouple
over a year ago

Longfield

Men’s Lingerie.

Should be fun I’m known to be…

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

a Calvin Klein model in ma spare time, and I....

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Always advertise walkers on the arse of the pants

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ethel put her teeth back in, grabbed Doris and

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By *leasebegentleCouple
over a year ago

Longfield

Headed outside to Gary’s cab waiting to take him to his advertising shoot.

Can we come Gary?

Of course ladies.

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

but the Cab driver tuned out to be non other than...

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Gary’s mum

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Margaret, who died a few years ago. Okay everyone let’s go

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By *ung fun walesMan
over a year ago

up the road

And watch whilst garry gets his

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

kit off again to celebrate England’s success at the Euro’s. Oh My, said Ethel, I never realised celebrity footballers had such oversized

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By *ung fun walesMan
over a year ago

up the road

Padding shoved in to fill their shorts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But not in Gary’s case ! Doris and Ethel both swooned as the former gap toothed England international showed them his hairy chest and bulging

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By *ung fun walesMan
over a year ago

up the road

Haemorrhoids at which point Ethel said

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

I think I've got some ointment for that in ma handbag, would you like me to...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Spread it where the sun don’t shine ?

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By *ung fun walesMan
over a year ago

up the road

Or put it on the end of Doris’s tongue and

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Then get her to stick her tongue into Dave’s boots because she is has a secret kink for

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Footwear

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ


"Footwear"

It's supposed to be a sentence, not just 1 word

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

although Gary was on the phone to Len at the time, he....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Was trying to arrange a threesome to enjoy while watching Spain play Italy but Len was too busy

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

throwing a few shapes in Ethel's bedroom whilst...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Doris covered him in whipping cream, cherries and

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Garlic bread that had been left behind by Peter Kay.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Kay also brought some lovely warm dough balls which he carefully placed under Ethel’s

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

cat, who had been peacefully sleeping in the...

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By *leasebegentleCouple
over a year ago

Longfield

Wig that was still out in the garden.

Come stroke my pussy said Ethel to..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Peter Kay who replied, Never mind about Car Share ! How about we all share this lovely

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham


"Footwear

It's supposed to be a sentence, not just 1 word "

Oh dear

In trouble again

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham


"Peter Kay who replied, Never mind about Car Share ! How about we all share this lovely "

Cake that I’ve just bought from staniforths

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Doris and Ethel hadn't seen such a huge cake for many a year, so they both...

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Had a big piece each with lots of cream

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Of every kind: ice cream, whipped cream, clotted cream and two lovely cream pies from Peter Kay and

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

His cat who also loved cream

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By *leasebegentleCouple
over a year ago

Longfield

They felt totally stuffed and decided to have an afternoon nap.

While they were asleep…

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

England were triumphant in the Euros and everyone celebrated by getting naked and joining together in a huge, sweaty

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Pile of bodies in the Wembley tunnel. Gareth Southgate said ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What a Sterling effort ! Then he took out his Kane and

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Threw him up in the air (like that bit in Dirty Dancing). Kane summersaulted over

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By *leasebegentleCouple
over a year ago

Longfield

Ethel and Doris and landed on the cat and squashed it.

Everyone…

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

went to find Len's squirrel who was...

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Licking up the last bits of cream

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

From Len’s toupee which in all the excitement had got mistaken for

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By *ung fun walesMan
over a year ago

up the road

[Removed by poster at 08/07/21 09:41:44]

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By *ung fun walesMan
over a year ago

up the road

Ethel’s untrimmed bush

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Which she grown all through lockdown in the hope that she'd meet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Leoblooms and that he’d plait it for her.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As Leo delicately criss crossed the fine fanny hair, AnotherUsername burst into the room and announced

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

that she had a secret crush on....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Half the England football team !! Which half ? asked Doris.

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Who cares said Ethel

I’m so tired and need a lay down

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

but Doris wasn't tired and let Ethel have her nap, she got on the phone to...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Gareth Southgate and said my mate fancies half your team ! Would you like them to do a motivational speech before

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 08/07/21 22:30:54]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you take it in turn at penalties?

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By *leasebegentleCouple
over a year ago

Longfield

Doris was getting bored of all this football chat.

I can’t stand football I’d rather watch…

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A massive orgy involving me, Ethel, Dave, the gorgeous Italian players and

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Len, who had only just got out of the shower and was smelling of....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pine cones and anti freeze, which he always applied after a shower to prevent

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

His skin getting any more wrinkly and saggy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And so the orgy began with everyone standing for the National Anthem and placing their right hand on their

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By *ung fun walesMan
over a year ago

up the road

Left bumcheeks and

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Farting in perfect tune. Doris wiped a tear from her glass eye and said

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By *ung fun walesMan
over a year ago

up the road

I think i just followed through

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On my promise to give Raheem Sterling a bj with my teeth out. He said it was very

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

similar to the one that Gary gave me. So Dave walked into the room and announced....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm missing out here! Who's going to give me an enormous

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Kick up the arse as I wasn’t invited anyway

Shucks

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

So Doris and Ethel got their knitting needles and wool out and decided to.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Make willy warmers for the entire England squad. When they took measurements they were surprised to see that Declan Rice had

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

A minge instead

Now what……said ethel

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By *leasebegentleCouple
over a year ago

Longfield

I’ll have to knit you a thong instead.

Shouldn’t take me long.

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

So Doris went to put the kettle on and found an envelope on the floor, it was addressed to...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ace Winger courtesy of Fab Towers ! Inside was a letter which said

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Where’s everyone gone ?

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

So Len had woken up after a nap, went downstairs and saw Gary and John Barnes practising....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Their rap for a new collaboration with Dizee Rascal. Well, said Ethel, that sounds absolutely

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

like my kinda stuff, c'mon Doris, we're gonna....

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By *leasebegentleCouple
over a year ago

Longfield

Show these men up by doing our own rap.

Let’s get practicing..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So Doris began: They call me Doris, they say I’m frisky, but that’s just when

I’ve had some whiskey. I like it hard, I like it long, I like it when

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

They give me tongue

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And Ethel joined in: My name is Ethel, I like to Swing, I love it when they make

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

It ring

My knees will shake just like a rattel

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ll beat you all in a rap battle

Watch me go at it with Gary and Len

They’re what I call two real hot men

The three of us will make some noise

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

And more so when out come the toys

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They make us moan

They make us scream

Wake up Ethel, said Doris,

You're having a dream!

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Meanwhile Len & Gary had sneaked out of the back door to....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Find Dave who'd been missing for ages. He was last seen in a caravan with

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mick Hucknall and Gazza. Money was too tight to mention but Gazza liked to party so they’d stopped off at Bargain Booze for a

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Six pack and some Pringles. Dave asked Mick if his shirt was crimson but no he said, it's simply red. Gazza laughed, farted and replied

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well it ain’t holding back the years mate. I’ll have to get me old mate Gok Wan to give you a

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Makeover and a lovely facial. Dave suddenly woke up and said, Something got me started! It was a tube of Pringles stuck in his

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Arse……….really need to get someone to pull this out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Of of there with a pair of pliers. Gazza stepped forward and

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Farted

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Loudly to the tune of Vindaloo

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

That spicy vindaloo which

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Was a present from Prince William as a thank you for

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Giving him a blowjob secretly

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Doris and Ethel had ran out of wool, after having knitted willy warmers for everyone, so they decided to...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Use Len's toupee to make a jockstrap for Harry Maguire which he could wear when

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Prancing round the field kicking his balls

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By *leasebegentleCouple
over a year ago

Longfield

Anyone for tea said Doris.

I’m thirsty after all this fun.

Do you fancy…

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Penalties? No, said absolutely everyone!!! But Jack Grealish stepped forward and

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Offered to take the ladies home to relax for a while

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Gazza entertained the gentlemen by ...

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Taking the pics out of Ethel and doris

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

by wearing one of Ethel's bras, and grabbing....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Gazza's moobs which wobbled like a bouncy castle. Weh man, said Gazza, don't touch my

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Moobs mate. I’m gannin up the toon!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So off they all went for a big night out in Newcastle, stopping off first to pre-fuel at

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Jimmy Nail's gaff, but only Gazza could understand what he was going on abuut like, cos nobody else did Jawdeespeak, so they.....

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By *leasebegentleCouple
over a year ago

Longfield

Decided to visit Cheryl Cole cos she also had that funny accent nobody could understand.

Just she spoke a bit more…

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Scouse

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because she'd been having an affair with Steven Gerrard. Meanwhile Ethel and Doris had pulled a couple of fit young men in Newcastle clubland and

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Wondered how they had got there seeing as they where last seen at home

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Furnishings where they'd bought a water bed to use when

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Entertaining visitors. Problem was they couldn't get it up the stairs so had left it in the front garden and the neighbours had complained when ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It leaked and there was lots of late night squirting from

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

The bed

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By *leasebegentleCouple
over a year ago

Longfield

At least it watered the flower beds.

Talking of water I must use the loo said Doris these water pills are…

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Too big to swallow. That's never stopped you before said Ethel with a dirty laugh. I remember when

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

you swallowed a cucumber, whole! Doris blushed and....

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Slapped her thigh

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By *leasebegentleCouple
over a year ago

Longfield

Anyone for a tuna and cucumber sandwich?

I promise the cucumber is straight from the…

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"Anyone for a tuna and cucumber sandwich?

I promise the cucumber is straight from the…"

Woods...

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Oh hang on a minute I meant the fridge

My mind is playing up with me again

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Look behind the hedge. Is that Michael Barrymore doing the crab ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, he's messing around with a lobster ! Dave appeared and said that's really shellfish of you

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

How about I make us all lobster bisque for lunch ? Barrymore replied ...

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

"There's a clause in ma contract, that says that I can't eat lobster",....

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

But I can eat eel

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Tell u what…..I’ll nip to the chippy

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By *leasebegentleCouple
over a year ago

Longfield

Cod and chips twice and some mushy peas.

Don’t forget…

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

some Jellied Eels for Len, he starts acting a bit strangely and.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Gets all cockney, talking rhyming slang and looking at Doris's boat race and her plates of meat

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

before he goes up the apples and pears to dream about....

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By *leasebegentleCouple
over a year ago

Longfield

Linda Lusardi.

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Then eat some..m

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By *leasebegentleCouple
over a year ago

Longfield

Muffins.

Dribbled in…

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Gold

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Finger, sang Doris loudly, He's the man, the man with the golden

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Bum.

Come on lads, she shouted Get yer bums out for the gals

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But Len thought she said Get Yer Plums Out so he removed his superman boxers and

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

handed them to Ethel, before pulling off a polished cha-cha-cha. Ethel said ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wish Dave could move like that! He's got two left feet and often trips over his huge

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Boots, which were now full of gellied eels, thanks to Len. “Well you know what that means”, said Ethel. “Big boots, big…”

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Feet (groan..). He was a size 12 and had to get his shoes made to measure along with his

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Socks, which he ordered directly from the Tibetan people of China. They made him a rug once and he liked his socks to match.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He was also thinking about getting a matching Willy warmer and Ethel said she’d knit him one if he showed her his

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Cock so she get the right measurement

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dave walked over to his van and opened the door to show Ethel his prize cockerel and several chickens. Dave loved any opportunity to show his cock off.

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

[Removed by poster at 15/07/21 19:58:07]

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Ethel smirked and shouted to Doris......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hey Doris, Dave’s got a massive cock and it has some beautiful plumage.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Careful though, if you stroke it too hard it’ll spit in your face ! You can touch it said Dave but just don’t

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rub it’s head, he’s got an infection in his eye.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I thought your cock looked a little sad said Doris, that must be it. Wouldn’t he like some female company ? Perhaps Ethel and me could share your cock and show him

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By *ce Winger OP   Man
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

our collection of Foghorn Leghorn videos, then...

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By *leasebegentleCouple
over a year ago

Longfield

Introduce him to…

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The man who's going to eat him at Christmas. His name is

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Dirty den from number 10

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