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Male : Female Ratio?

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By *eynard_Argent OP   Man
over a year ago

Witham

I see the new Fab video feature gives priorities to those who are site supporters AND verified AND photo-verified. That makes a lot of sense.

As we all know the M:F ratio on Fabs is significantly skewed. Can this be partly addressed by offering such benefits to female members, so they have a more positive online experience? As word gets around it may make more female swingers join Fabs and more stay longer?

I can see this will be an additional spur to FAKE female profiles, but stamping-out those is a different issue, one which we know Fabs is also addressing.

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By *ittle LunaCouple
over a year ago

London (future visits not now)

As I do all the admin for our profile which is very focussed on my lovely Luna's adventures, I get to see what dumbasses many guys can be. Luna very quickly decided she didn't want to deal with the messages at all for that reason. If I wasn't around we wouldn't still be on the site because I'm not easily upset by rude people... but it has shown me that its not a very female friendly place at times.

The point of my comment is that I wouldn't be at all surprised if many women dip a toe in and quickly decide being swamped by stupid messages is not what they had in mind.

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By *rincess PhoenixWoman
over a year ago

Southampton


"As I do all the admin for our profile which is very focussed on my lovely Luna's adventures, I get to see what dumbasses many guys can be. Luna very quickly decided she didn't want to deal with the messages at all for that reason. If I wasn't around we wouldn't still be on the site because I'm not easily upset by rude people... but it has shown me that its not a very female friendly place at times.

The point of my comment is that I wouldn't be at all surprised if many women dip a toe in and quickly decide being swamped by stupid messages is not what they had in mind."

I've thought about leaving this site a few times due to dumbasses but then I find a rare gem and I'm tempted back!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A lot of women join and leave due to the aggregation and abuse men dish out here (and couples)

Currently the site is pushing people to report fake female profiles and that's a good point with most suspended (I presume this is an automatic thing)

however to address the 10 to one ratio maybe they should be harsher on abusive men with an automatic suspension of a profile if its abusive to women for say 12 hours this would make many think twice and be more respectful and so more women staying on site.

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By *inaryGuyMan
over a year ago

Near the River

Sadly only by charging a subscription for male profiles will you get the ratio down to better levels. Also maybe stop non-site supporters from being able to send messages will sift out a lot of the time wasters and idiots

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By *idnightxBrownCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham

This is what happens on the Internet people say what they want because to be honest there's no backlash, get used to it or just meet people out in the real world

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By *ittle LunaCouple
over a year ago

London (future visits not now)


"...to address the 10 to one ratio maybe they should be harsher on abusive men with an automatic suspension of a profile if its abusive to women for say 12 hours this would make many think twice and be more respectful and so more women staying on site. "

100% agree. I have reported people who have been absolutely vile - even threatening (one guys claiming he was going to report us to the police as Luna must be under coercion)

Being asked for bareback when profile says explicitly that will never happen - being sent pictures of money asking for me to let them play for cash...

Some of that kind of behaviour should result in an instant ban - admins here should be able to view a reported message if its said to be threatening or harassment and ban them there and then. They can keep the subscription money.

I can report them which is no more reassuring then blocking. They should be GONE! It's not enough that I can avoid their abuse - they ruin this place for the rest of us which affects everyone, blocks or not.

Personally I think there should be no ability for single guys to message without paying some small fee... £10. And then if they want to act like idiots and get banned its another £10. That will cut it right down overnight.

One downside of a system that suspends them for 8-12 hours if reported could easily be abused by others and involve a lot of admin time. I think it may be best just to have crystal clear rules and kick out anyone who can't respect boundaries - just as you would in your home.

Love to the rest of you - happy fabbing!

David

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"As I do all the admin for our profile which is very focussed on my lovely Luna's adventures, I get to see what dumbasses many guys can be. Luna very quickly decided she didn't want to deal with the messages at all for that reason. If I wasn't around we wouldn't still be on the site because I'm not easily upset by rude people... but it has shown me that its not a very female friendly place at times.

The point of my comment is that I wouldn't be at all surprised if many women dip a toe in and quickly decide being swamped by stupid messages is not what they had in mind."

I agree 100% if my wife dealt with the rude, obnoxious, crass and at times abusive messages that many single males send she would have left by now. Thankfully we are a couple and I the male am the one who deals with the single male messages. It can be hard work filtering all that crap out to find the decent genuine guys who are quality single male swingers.

I can imagine many single woman have joined and then left due to the onslaught of rude messages from some of the single men. I don't know what the answer is I know the genuine single male swingers we chat with are just as frustrated by these rude singles males who lets face it aren't swingers.

KJ x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"...to address the 10 to one ratio maybe they should be harsher on abusive men with an automatic suspension of a profile if its abusive to women for say 12 hours this would make many think twice and be more respectful and so more women staying on site.

100% agree. I have reported people who have been absolutely vile - even threatening (one guys claiming he was going to report us to the police as Luna must be under coercion)

Being asked for bareback when profile says explicitly that will never happen - being sent pictures of money asking for me to let them play for cash...

Some of that kind of behaviour should result in an instant ban - admins here should be able to view a reported message if its said to be threatening or harassment and ban them there and then. They can keep the subscription money.

I can report them which is no more reassuring then blocking. They should be GONE! It's not enough that I can avoid their abuse - they ruin this place for the rest of us which affects everyone, blocks or not.

Personally I think there should be no ability for single guys to message without paying some small fee... £10. And then if they want to act like idiots and get banned its another £10. That will cut it right down overnight.

One downside of a system that suspends them for 8-12 hours if reported could easily be abused by others and involve a lot of admin time. I think it may be best just to have crystal clear rules and kick out anyone who can't respect boundaries - just as you would in your home.

Love to the rest of you - happy fabbing!

David"

Sorry you have had that type of abuse sadly we have had similar. It's why we are now 99% clubs only.

Can admin not view the abusive messages they send when we report them? Sure they should be able to as they could hold them accountable and it takes out the he said she said.

KJ x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As a non abusive, non pricky single guy on fab. I have to say that it saddens me that women either in a couple or single, have to deal with vile behaviour on fab or any other site. It makes the whole process more difficult for us all. I agree that fab should find a way of making it more difficult for abuse to get through. As a genuine single guy, that is interested in all the scene has to offer socially as well as sexually, I would be willing to have to be subject to extra verification etc if it made the whole experience better for everyone.

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By *hatawasteMan
over a year ago

stafford

Certainly a few good points being made which I agree a lot with . My personal view is that removing the 'free' option for single males would give every site supporter a much better experience .

As the saying goes it's 'quality not quantity' that should be a priority on here not having a huge membership .As well as that reducing the free option for single males and introducing a more welcoming option for single women would also help every site supporter to get a more positive experience .

I do not think that a ' free' option should exist for couples though as in many cases couples on here can be just one active person in a relationship with a partner who is none the wiser a lot of the time .

Now as the question of ' how' someone proves who they are at sign up though ?

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By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple

Men just need to treat people with respect and drop the double standards, it's not difficult. Until this happens things won't change.

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By *onic2Man
over a year ago

Bromley

If we try to balance this equation I would see it like this.

1.that the the website needs as many paid users as possible.

2. The duty of care where is to get the people they have have as members a positive user experience.

3. Membership fee on this site is ridiculously low (less than you might give away as a tip to a taxi driver & that's just money you're giving away for nothing in return) and having that low barrier to entry I'm sure it's one of the reasons there are so many people on fabs..... but it would be no bad thing if there were less in total but they were more that paid.

4. Eternal free membership should end. Given that there are always going to be people that are assholes and needs to be banned and can't stop for the prize in the first place but if you also can't stop them sign up again for free, where is the deterrent or the power to protect the members once these people are identified.

where else would expect free membership to continue forever. Implement a trial period and I think that 30 days about the longest industry standard of Trials. Then you have to upgrade to a paid membership or your account is cancelled.

Only admin can tell us the statistics of whether or not it is the free members who get the most complaints or the paid... however this is unlikely to be forthcoming being that there would then be a decision to make if the figures were released and a eternal debate would rage hence forth.

Regarding suspensions in regard to improper conduct, aggression or or threatening behaviour.

A three strikes and you're out system would seem to be quite reasonable.

Once admin have determined if they uphold the complaint as being reasonable ( not made maliciously without substance or fact, however this is not to say that they uphold the complaint to the level of a strike just that it is is reasonable substance)

First offence for 1-week.

Second offence ban of one month

If it gets to a third strike then surely.... no one could have complaints for having their account terminated.

No system is ever going to be perfect for people that want to try and play it but it's about making it difficult and giving some cloud to the authority.

Just my thoughts

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By *onic2Man
over a year ago

Bromley

Just one more thing I found it's strange that there is an option to search for new users surely this just exponentially increases the harassment as they can be targeted specifically rather than just be found as part of a local area search?

Surely this is the point at which as noted the site is more likely to lose single women due to the Predator like nature of this option

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By *ablo minibar123Woman
over a year ago

.


"A lot of women join and leave due to the aggregation and abuse men dish out here (and couples)

Currently the site is pushing people to report fake female profiles and that's a good point with most suspended (I presume this is an automatic thing)

however to address the 10 to one ratio maybe they should be harsher on abusive men with an automatic suspension of a profile if its abusive to women for say 12 hours this would make many think twice and be more respectful and so more women staying on site. "

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By *onty1971Man
over a year ago

London St Helier Trier

1. Commercial Model

Commercially it must be difficult to get a revenue model here right.

Coupled to this is that a hack would reveal card use to profiles...

There is one site I am a member off that gives the normal payment options and cash in an envelope.

2. Behaviour

Nearly none of us drive our shopping trolley the way we drive on the road. We have the distance to the social space the car brings. Albeit it seems men in Swinger Clubs can still be morons... If morons can pay they will enter the club, join the website etc. Altough I am not faced with the issue of bad behaviour I do face the issue of getting attention. Perseverance works however with hope and not with the despair at the stuff and volume the Ladies have to read.

Admiration for anyone who can improve the Revenue Model or has the patience to stick around or both.

Happy Swinging all in 2020.

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By *bob1202Man
over a year ago

Blackburn

As a male trying to make a connection on this site I am finding it increasingly difficult to get a chance to engage with women. I do not blame people targeted by males for ignoring or blocking people. Unfortunately it makes it difficult for genuine male members to shine through. I think like in clubs, single men have to subscribe and verify. This will cut down on the rude anonymous males. Perhaps verified singles regardless of their situation could have there own forum group. Bring the like minded together.

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By *onty1971Man
over a year ago

London St Helier Trier


"As a male trying to make a connection on this site I am finding it increasingly difficult to get a chance to engage with women. I do not blame people targeted by males for ignoring or blocking people. Unfortunately it makes it difficult for genuine male members to shine through. I think like in clubs, single men have to subscribe and verify. This will cut down on the rude anonymous males. Perhaps verified singles regardless of their situation could have there own forum group. Bring the like minded together."

How would you prevent or reduce infiltration by the non genuine guys?

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By *udewhennudeMan
over a year ago

newport


"If we try to balance this equation I would see it like this.

1.that the the website needs as many paid users as possible.

2. The duty of care where is to get the people they have have as members a positive user experience.

3. Membership fee on this site is ridiculously low (less than you might give away as a tip to a taxi driver & that's just money you're giving away for nothing in return) and having that low barrier to entry I'm sure it's one of the reasons there are so many people on fabs..... but it would be no bad thing if there were less in total but they were more that paid.

4. Eternal free membership should end. Given that there are always going to be people that are assholes and needs to be banned and can't stop for the prize in the first place but if you also can't stop them sign up again for free, where is the deterrent or the power to protect the members once these people are identified.

where else would expect free membership to continue forever. Implement a trial period and I think that 30 days about the longest industry standard of Trials. Then you have to upgrade to a paid membership or your account is cancelled.

Only admin can tell us the statistics of whether or not it is the free members who get the most complaints or the paid... however this is unlikely to be forthcoming being that there would then be a decision to make if the figures were released and a eternal debate would rage hence forth.

Regarding suspensions in regard to improper conduct, aggression or or threatening behaviour.

A three strikes and you're out system would seem to be quite reasonable.

Once admin have determined if they uphold the complaint as being reasonable ( not made maliciously without substance or fact, however this is not to say that they uphold the complaint to the level of a strike just that it is is reasonable substance)

First offence for 1-week.

Second offence ban of one month

If it gets to a third strike then surely.... no one could have complaints for having their account terminated.

No system is ever going to be perfect for people that want to try and play it but it's about making it difficult and giving some cloud to the authority.

Just my thoughts

"

No one pays for membership on here it’s a free site, members can opt to support the site for which they get additional benefits. All these guys asking for ‘higher membership fees’ for men are invariably trying to price out other guys in the hope of increasing the odds in their favour. Rather than looking at what they can do to improve their chances. Paying more money, whether it’s a man, woman or couple doesn’t necessarily mean you get a better class of person, in fact it can actually make them feel more entitled as they have paid for something.

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By *bob1202Man
over a year ago

Blackburn


"As a male trying to make a connection on this site I am finding it increasingly difficult to get a chance to engage with women. I do not blame people targeted by males for ignoring or blocking people. Unfortunately it makes it difficult for genuine male members to shine through. I think like in clubs, single men have to subscribe and verify. This will cut down on the rude anonymous males. Perhaps verified singles regardless of their situation could have there own forum group. Bring the like minded together.

How would you prevent or reduce infiltration by the non genuine guys?"

There is no easy answer on this. Payment for membership is a start. Perhaps a comprehensive questionnaire should be completed to ensure there preferences are displayed. I dont really know, perhaps a swinger club visit could also be shown on the profile which demonstrates if they are into the swinging scene or not. Possibly a different element on this website for the single minglers to seperate them. I dont have a simple answer im afraid.

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By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed

This is probably the most successful model for a swingers site that we have come across. Charging single males would probably lead to an increase in fake couple and fake female profiles in an attempt to circumnavigate the cost.

Because we set our filters and do our own looking, we have never had any single guys contact us or be abusive. I do wonder whether upon joining a small how to guide would not go amiss along with setting all filters on day 1 to no contact.

We should be encouraging new ladies to be the contacters, I would also restrict the number of messages based on how long a profile has been active.

That way if you get banned even if you start a new profile the reach of any abusive messages would be limited.

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By *udewhennudeMan
over a year ago

newport

Why do people continually want to change fab, when it works well for the majority of us. Very few off the changes which people keep banging on about are actually required, if at all, if people actually used the tools which fab provides for them and a little common sense. If you want a site which you have to pay to use there are plenty out there you can join, but doubt you’ll find one better than Fab.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sadly only by charging a subscription for male profiles will you get the ratio down to better levels. Also maybe stop non-site supporters from being able to send messages will sift out a lot of the time wasters and idiots "

This wouldn't work much as you'd just get many more fake "couples" profiles being formed to get around the cost I imagine...

B

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This is probably the most successful model for a swingers site that we have come across. Charging single males would probably lead to an increase in fake couple and fake female profiles in an attempt to circumnavigate the cost.

Because we set our filters and do our own looking, we have never had any single guys contact us or be abusive. I do wonder whether upon joining a small how to guide would not go amiss along with setting all filters on day 1 to no contact.

We should be encouraging new ladies to be the contacters, I would also restrict the number of messages based on how long a profile has been active.

That way if you get banned even if you start a new profile the reach of any abusive messages would be limited.

"

Or if I'd gone through the entire thread I could have just said ^^^ This.

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By *uietlykinkymeWoman
over a year ago

kinky land

Okay

I used to be a site supporter; however, they ignore our requests time after time.

If they allowed us to keep friends messages on top of the inbox, if they prevented random men from sending 2/3/4/5 messages before the first is read and many other things (not showing as online when in the forum) then I'd absolutely support again.

As I'm the 'product' I'm not going to support as well.

Making a membership fee mandatory will make me leave. It's bad enough single men get charged more for club membership and entry. I'm not prepared to pay to be here and I do not believe men should pay to be here either.

I do think simply auto switching off messages from single guys for new accounts and a welcome message explaining the messaging filter system, linking to the forums (advice from other users, how to get verified etc) would stop a lot of the people being scared off

As for chat/cam I'm not going in there until they have a chat only room. I don't have a cam I don't want a cam.

If I can't *feel* it; I can get porn at my leisure from where ever I want Having loads of men and couple bombard me

And lastly.

Some women and some couples are WORSE than single men, both online and in the flesh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"As a male trying to make a connection on this site I am finding it increasingly difficult to get a chance to engage with women. I do not blame people targeted by males for ignoring or blocking people. Unfortunately it makes it difficult for genuine male members to shine through. I think like in clubs, single men have to subscribe and verify. This will cut down on the rude anonymous males. Perhaps verified singles regardless of their situation could have there own forum group. Bring the like minded together."

I am not verified that n this profile, I have been to socials but because I left the site for a while people forget who I am. It’s not fair to charge single men more, filters work just fine. Personally I would like balance within the swing community, my local clubs charge single men 3-4 times more on entry as single women. Couples seem to only look for single women, most single women are looking for other single women. There is a fab guys for men to meet men so why not fab women?

I get a lot of feedback saying this isn’t a sex site but to be honest a lot of women treat it as one.

Minimum standard should be a photo veri, like men women shouldn’t be allowed cam to cam veri.

The cost could increase for support to say £5 for 30 days if you don’t support you can only send 2 messages or not receive reply.

Or non supporters can only see profile pic.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"Okay

I used to be a site supporter; however, they ignore our requests time after time.

If they allowed us to keep friends messages on top of the inbox, if they prevented random men from sending 2/3/4/5 messages before the first is read and many other things (not showing as online when in the forum) then I'd absolutely support again.

As I'm the 'product' I'm not going to support as well.

Making a membership fee mandatory will make me leave. It's bad enough single men get charged more for club membership and entry. I'm not prepared to pay to be here and I do not believe men should pay to be here either.

I do think simply auto switching off messages from single guys for new accounts and a welcome message explaining the messaging filter system, linking to the forums (advice from other users, how to get verified etc) would stop a lot of the people being scared off

As for chat/cam I'm not going in there until they have a chat only room. I don't have a cam I don't want a cam.

If I can't *feel* it; I can get porn at my leisure from where ever I want Having loads of men and couple bombard me

And lastly.

Some women and some couples are WORSE than single men, both online and in the flesh "

You don't have to use a cam, you can just type to chat. It's not mandatory.

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By *irty PrettyWoman
over a year ago

Cardiff


"Why do people continually want to change fab, when it works well for the majority of us. Very few off the changes which people keep banging on about are actually required, if at all, if people actually used the tools which fab provides for them and a little common sense. If you want a site which you have to pay to use there are plenty out there you can join, but doubt you’ll find one better than Fab."

In spite of many aggravations here, I’d agree it’s the best/most effective site I’ve found. I’ve tried others with extortionate fees and they’re useless. Introducing that model here would probably ruin Fab for most of us.

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By *pmsldCouple
over a year ago

kettering

The tools are there already for all profile types to use. A tutorial might help for when people log in for the first time, somthing a little interactive that pops up and explains the settings and features and gives the option to set them.

Other option is when people sign up auto set their options to only allow verified profiles (verified by others not just photo veri) to initiate contact for x amount of days (enough time for people to learn the site and set there own options) not perfect but in theory it should knock down the number of profiles able to contact them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A lot of women join and leave due to the aggregation and abuse men dish out here (and couples)

Currently the site is pushing people to report fake female profiles and that's a good point with most suspended (I presume this is an automatic thing)

however to address the 10 to one ratio maybe they should be harsher on abusive men with an automatic suspension of a profile if its abusive to women for say 12 hours this would make many think twice and be more respectful and so more women staying on site. That's a good idea I think but they would only behave themselves for a short time perhaps a 3 strikes rule should come into effect 1st strike 12 hr ban, 2nd strike week ban, 3rd strike IP completely blocked for life"

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By *r easy1981Man
over a year ago

leeds

I don’t see why a man should send a nasty message or be rude take it on the chin it is what it is

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