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Redressing the balance

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I think that all single males should HAVE to be site supporters for at least 50 days and not be able to message or post within there first 50 day site supporters membership.

I AM a single male and think this would go some way to dealing with the number of fake accounts and pests on here.......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So they would be paying the membership for 50 days and getting what exactly? And after 50 days they'd be expecting a guaranteed shag?

Don't quite follow the logic...

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By *penbicoupleCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

So would be less likely to get meets and therefore verifications. So I would trust them even less.

Men who are pests are arseholes. Delaying that doesn't change it.

However, as for fakes, most fake accounts we've encountered have been guys pretending to be couples or females. This would not make any difference to that.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

That's just men then not women?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"So they would be paying the membership for 50 days and getting what exactly? And after 50 days they'd be expecting a guaranteed shag?

Don't quite follow the logic..."

It could (emphasis here) deter the ones who set up account after account, also may deter those who expect a fuck on joining and every week thereafter. They’dbe Getting little in the first 50 days and that’s the point, a test of mettle if you like.

I’m not saying it’s perfect but it’s ruining the site in my opinion (and despite this profiles age I’ve been here from virtually day one).

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"That's just men then not women?"

Yup, sexist aren’t I! As is often said men are just a commodity in swinging, porn etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It would indeed redress the balance.

No men would join.

It still wouldn't stop existing members m/f setting up fake profiles to get around blocks etc etc, nor couples accounts who only have a single person in them either imo.

What about letting membership lapsing? Does the profile then get removed? I do it when not looking new meets as the benefits don't amount to much then.

What I would say is that any new profile shouldn't be allowed to message anyone in say a week for numerous reasons.

This however would help with.... 1.) vengeful profiles that delete and reappear and delete after sending nasty messages, which now under the new implications of messages being removed when they delete makes it harder for people to report and also means admin doesn't have to bother as evidence is gone.

2.) Help with giving a newbie time to get to grips with some accepted fab protocols and rules. And reduce the male getting too excited and soaking in the first few days before they realise it doesn't really work.

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot


"I think that all single males should HAVE to be site supporters for at least 50 days and not be able to message or post within there first 50 day site supporters membership.

I AM a single male and think this would go some way to dealing with the number of fake accounts and pests on here......."

Why on earth would anyone pay to be a site supporter but not be able to use the site for nearly two months?

I wouldn't......

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I think that all single males should HAVE to be site supporters for at least 50 days and not be able to message or post within there first 50 day site supporters membership.

I AM a single male and think this would go some way to dealing with the number of fake accounts and pests on here.......

Why on earth would anyone pay to be a site supporter but not be able to use the site for nearly two months?

I wouldn't......"

That’s sort of my point. The 50 days is arbitrary, could be 10,20, whatever. You could use the site just not immediately start messaging people but could post on forums thereby helping to build an online personality, credibility or whatever you want to call it

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"It would indeed redress the balance.

No men would join.

It still wouldn't stop existing members m/f setting up fake profiles to get around blocks etc etc, nor couples accounts who only have a single person in them either imo.

What about letting membership lapsing? Does the profile then get removed? I do it when not looking new meets as the benefits don't amount to much then.

What I would say is that any new profile shouldn't be allowed to message anyone in say a week for numerous reasons.

This however would help with.... 1.) vengeful profiles that delete and reappear and delete after sending nasty messages, which now under the new implications of messages being removed when they delete makes it harder for people to report and also means admin doesn't have to bother as evidence is gone.

2.) Help with giving a newbie time to get to grips with some accepted fab protocols and rules. And reduce the male getting too excited and soaking in the first few days before they realise it doesn't really work."

You make some good and valid points. Maybe the sort of guys who are deterred from joining because of a “qualifying” period or whatever are the sort that should be deterred ( note my use of maybe).

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By *entralscotscpl7Couple
over a year ago

Falkirk

Nope.

Site works fine as it is.

What I find funny is someone has to be penalised to make the “site better “.

If it’s not working for you then you need to ask yourself what are you doing wrong rather than blame everyone else.

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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago

Dudley

I wouldn't be happy if men weren't allowed to message me, that's my whole reason for being here.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Nope.

Site works fine as it is.

What I find funny is someone has to be penalised to make the “site better “.

If it’s not working for you then you need to ask yourself what are you doing wrong rather than blame everyone else.

"

Site works fine for me. It was a suggestion to improve it. Don’t recall blaming anybody for anything

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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago

Dudley


"Nope.

Site works fine as it is.

What I find funny is someone has to be penalised to make the “site better “.

If it’s not working for you then you need to ask yourself what are you doing wrong rather than blame everyone else.

Site works fine for me. It was a suggestion to improve it. Don’t recall blaming anybody for anything "

Who would it improve it for though?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think that all single males should HAVE to be site supporters for at least 50 days and not be able to message or post within there first 50 day site supporters membership.

I AM a single male and think this would go some way to dealing with the number of fake accounts and pests on here.......

Why on earth would anyone pay to be a site supporter but not be able to use the site for nearly two months?

I wouldn't......

That’s sort of my point. The 50 days is arbitrary, could be 10,20, whatever. You could use the site just not immediately start messaging people but could post on forums thereby helping to build an online personality, credibility or whatever you want to call it"

You say they cant message or post for 50 days, so therefore they cannot post in the forum build up an online personality can they

It would not work in practice either, as the single men would simply pretend to be couples or females. No man would pay for 50 days for no service x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I thought we already had a 7 day ban on forums.

I think those who carpet bomb everyone within a 50 mile radius because they believe this is instashag filter themselves out of the running through their own actions.

Those who are more selective and consider who they message are masters of their own destiny.

The huge amount of men on here do skew things slightly, but ultimately profile / pictures/ message combo's will dictate just how much luck you have.

The things you can't change are how many people who meet your needs are in your vicinity and how many people find you attractive. A message time out won't affect that.

Or are you suggesting that if there were less men, women would lover their standards

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By *pagafocsMan
over a year ago

Madrid

Better to find another ways like for example be able to report people who lie. The most kind of profiles I get messages from re men who are straight in their profile but ask to suck or other stuff. I don't mind but clearly are liers so... If they do with me they'll be doing with other people

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By *moothman2000Man
over a year ago

Leicestershire

Think the site might struggle to charge for a service without actually providing one for 50 days.

There are a number of things that can be done to 'secure' the site, but the reality is that a determined individual will find ways around them as fast as they are rolled out - and they would stifle the usability of the site.

On a more positive note, I think most genuine people.on here are aware of the warning signs and know when to pull the plug on fakers.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally that's discrimination.

I agreed better way to stop fakes is needed.

Copy of driver or passport with joining.. But I guess that has data issues too.

No right answer. Add in complications add in more costs

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales

Having never had that we are interested in single guys & still being bombarded by them until we blocked them all we think ALL new profiles full stop should not be allowed to instigate messaging.

That way the less info you provide by way of decent pics, profile blub etc. The longer it will last.

It should also put paid to the weekend muppets joining just to bombard everyone with shite & then disappear.

We also think when members are found to be fakes & removed then the veri string should be followed & all should be removed or at least given a warning.

Fair enough it doesn't take long to figure them out but you really shouldn't have to.

Those that then make the extra effort to get a decent profile & a club/group social or play veri should reap the rewards.

S&H

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A lot of profiles are fake... I think they should have to be verified as genuine until able to message!

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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago

Dudley


"Having never had that we are interested in single guys & still being bombarded by them until we blocked them all we think ALL new profiles full stop should not be allowed to instigate messaging.

That way the less info you provide by way of decent pics, profile blub etc. The longer it will last.

It should also put paid to the weekend muppets joining just to bombard everyone with shite & then disappear.

We also think when members are found to be fakes & removed then the veri string should be followed & all should be removed or at least given a warning.

Fair enough it doesn't take long to figure them out but you really shouldn't have to.

Those that then make the extra effort to get a decent profile & a club/group social or play veri should reap the rewards.

S&H

"

Why would people even want to join if they aren't allowed to message people? It makes no sense to stop people messaging.

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot


"Having never had that we are interested in single guys & still being bombarded by them until we blocked them all we think ALL new profiles full stop should not be allowed to instigate messaging.

That way the less info you provide by way of decent pics, profile blub etc. The longer it will last.

It should also put paid to the weekend muppets joining just to bombard everyone with shite & then disappear.

We also think when members are found to be fakes & removed then the veri string should be followed & all should be removed or at least given a warning.

Fair enough it doesn't take long to figure them out but you really shouldn't have to.

Those that then make the extra effort to get a decent profile & a club/group social or play veri should reap the rewards.

S&H

Why would people even want to join if they aren't allowed to message people? It makes no sense to stop people messaging."

This.

I don't get the "we're not looking for single guys, our profile says so, and yet we still get bombarded" brigade.

Instead of instigating draconian measures that drive people away from the site, just use your filters.

The site gives us every tool we need to control who can and cannot mail us.

Don't want men to message you? Block them.

Don't want women to message you? Block them.

Don't want couples to message you? Block them.

Seems like it's much easier to post whiney comments on the forums than it is to tick a mail preference box.

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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago

Dudley


"Having never had that we are interested in single guys & still being bombarded by them until we blocked them all we think ALL new profiles full stop should not be allowed to instigate messaging.

That way the less info you provide by way of decent pics, profile blub etc. The longer it will last.

It should also put paid to the weekend muppets joining just to bombard everyone with shite & then disappear.

We also think when members are found to be fakes & removed then the veri string should be followed & all should be removed or at least given a warning.

Fair enough it doesn't take long to figure them out but you really shouldn't have to.

Those that then make the extra effort to get a decent profile & a club/group social or play veri should reap the rewards.

S&H

Why would people even want to join if they aren't allowed to message people? It makes no sense to stop people messaging.

This.

I don't get the "we're not looking for single guys, our profile says so, and yet we still get bombarded" brigade.

Instead of instigating draconian measures that drive people away from the site, just use your filters.

The site gives us every tool we need to control who can and cannot mail us.

Don't want men to message you? Block them.

Don't want women to message you? Block them.

Don't want couples to message you? Block them.

Seems like it's much easier to post whiney comments on the forums than it is to tick a mail preference box.

"

Indeed. It pisses me off 'we don't like something so we must punish them all and stop anyone else enjoying something we don't like'.

Filters people! Use them!

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By *adame 2SwordsWoman
over a year ago

Victoria, London

Can't see how having a verification changes my decision making.

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot


"Having never had that we are interested in single guys & still being bombarded by them until we blocked them all we think ALL new profiles full stop should not be allowed to instigate messaging.

That way the less info you provide by way of decent pics, profile blub etc. The longer it will last.

It should also put paid to the weekend muppets joining just to bombard everyone with shite & then disappear.

We also think when members are found to be fakes & removed then the veri string should be followed & all should be removed or at least given a warning.

Fair enough it doesn't take long to figure them out but you really shouldn't have to.

Those that then make the extra effort to get a decent profile & a club/group social or play veri should reap the rewards.

S&H

Why would people even want to join if they aren't allowed to message people? It makes no sense to stop people messaging.

This.

I don't get the "we're not looking for single guys, our profile says so, and yet we still get bombarded" brigade.

Instead of instigating draconian measures that drive people away from the site, just use your filters.

The site gives us every tool we need to control who can and cannot mail us.

Don't want men to message you? Block them.

Don't want women to message you? Block them.

Don't want couples to message you? Block them.

Seems like it's much easier to post whiney comments on the forums than it is to tick a mail preference box.

Indeed. It pisses me off 'we don't like something so we must punish them all and stop anyone else enjoying something we don't like'.

Filters people! Use them! "

Word.

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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago

Dudley


"Having never had that we are interested in single guys & still being bombarded by them until we blocked them all we think ALL new profiles full stop should not be allowed to instigate messaging.

That way the less info you provide by way of decent pics, profile blub etc. The longer it will last.

It should also put paid to the weekend muppets joining just to bombard everyone with shite & then disappear.

We also think when members are found to be fakes & removed then the veri string should be followed & all should be removed or at least given a warning.

Fair enough it doesn't take long to figure them out but you really shouldn't have to.

Those that then make the extra effort to get a decent profile & a club/group social or play veri should reap the rewards.

S&H

Why would people even want to join if they aren't allowed to message people? It makes no sense to stop people messaging.

This.

I don't get the "we're not looking for single guys, our profile says so, and yet we still get bombarded" brigade.

Instead of instigating draconian measures that drive people away from the site, just use your filters.

The site gives us every tool we need to control who can and cannot mail us.

Don't want men to message you? Block them.

Don't want women to message you? Block them.

Don't want couples to message you? Block them.

Seems like it's much easier to post whiney comments on the forums than it is to tick a mail preference box.

Indeed. It pisses me off 'we don't like something so we must punish them all and stop anyone else enjoying something we don't like'.

Filters people! Use them!

Word. "

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By *etite HandfulWoman
over a year ago

Chester

I think some males are really petulant and hate the competition.

There should be equal rights for men and women on here penalising men who haven't been on here long or forcing them to pay will just lead to lazy men of a lower standard and personally I don't want that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 06/10/19 16:20:22]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If we control numbers through pricing and control messaging etc, who does that make things better for?

We are constantly told to put effort in, write a good profile, think about how you message etc. That is itself an imbalance.

All we do then is make it easier for everyone else to deselect us because we include something on our profiles you don't like. If you have female in your profile, you'll get messages. Your effort is in trawling through the dross.

No such thing as a free lunch..."
amended to account for banned words...

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By *oney to the beeWoman
over a year ago

Manchester

There should be less discrimination in swinging not more.

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By *apiomanMan
over a year ago

Shipley


"A lot of profiles are fake... I think they should have to be verified as genuine until able to message!"

It’s hard to get verified as genuine if you can’t arrange meets via messages. Some of us aren’t on the club scene and most socials (as far as I know) need a veri to be considered to be on the list.

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By *adame 2SwordsWoman
over a year ago

Victoria, London

So is this for men only? Surely it should be everyone

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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds


"I think that all single males should HAVE to be site supporters for at least 50 days and not be able to message or post within there first 50 day site supporters membership.

I AM a single male and think this would go some way to dealing with the number of fake accounts and pests on here......."

And the most ridiculous suggestion award goes to...

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales


"So is this for men only? Surely it should be everyone"

If people had read our post instead of what they wanted to read we said it should be for all newbies not just guys, BUT the stats & number of complaints of fakes etc. would corroborate our thoughts that because of the massive inbalance of users the single guys look likely to be the culprits of a lot of rubbish messages etc.

If no newbies could message until someone messaged them first then maybe it would put an end to the "In from the pub on a friday nighters" & all the other five minute wonders of all persuasions.

Those who put effort in to their profiles will possibly get messages, no guarantee but at the moment guys genuine or not are sending messages only to see them mass deleted because of the dross.

It's a bit like fishing. Bait the whole area in the hope one takes a bite or throw in a hand grenade kill off a few, stun loads good & bad & wade in & pick out one you hope is will be a good one

Oh & we agree with the ladies that say, "Block everyone, do the messaging yourself", we are prime advocates of that, however many many ladies will not do that for various reasons, a few of which we could guess at the first one being that not everyone is on here to swing or for that matter to even meet.

However we are all wasting our time on this thread anyway because you could come up with a sure fire 100% plan to remove all the fakes & timewasters etc & it still wouldn't be implemented, mainly because some of them pay subs.....

S&H

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I think that all single males should HAVE to be site supporters for at least 50 days and not be able to message or post within there first 50 day site supporters membership.

I AM a single male and think this would go some way to dealing with the number of fake accounts and pests on here.......

And the most ridiculous suggestion award goes to... "

Constructive.

It’s a suggestion that’s all, lighten up

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"So is this for men only? Surely it should be everyone"

It could be applied to everyone and sort of already is. My suggestion was made after seeing lots of ladies and couples complaining about unwanted comma with them.

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By *eneral HysteriaMan
over a year ago

Newcastle


"... As is often said men are just a commodity in swinging, porn etc"

Speak for yourself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So they would be paying the membership for 50 days and getting what exactly? And after 50 days they'd be expecting a guaranteed shag?

Don't quite follow the logic...

It could (emphasis here) deter the ones who set up account after account, also may deter those who expect a fuck on joining and every week thereafter. They’dbe Getting little in the first 50 days and that’s the point, a test of mettle if you like.

I’m not saying it’s perfect but it’s ruining the site in my opinion (and despite this profiles age I’ve been here from virtually day one)."
your frustration with this place could be more to do with your own profile, a person is Always at the end of all profiles and i personally haven't come across a fake profile as a guy so where does this knowledge you have come from? Are you bi?

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By *ollydoesWoman
over a year ago

Shangri-La

For goodness sake. This place is what you make of it. All the peooke moaning about "fake profiles" cant say ive cone across any i know for a fact to be fake. People seem so good at finding fake profiles. If you know they fake...dont message back. Just as someone has no pics or veri..or just because you sent a pic and they never replied does not mean the are fake. Ever think it coukd be something to do with yourselves, your messages or your profile...( thsts not to anyone in particular) If you dont wanna meet someone with no veris, use your filters. I find this site easy to use and fun. I use my filters to avioid messages from people i an not lookking for, if i still get one from someone not on my radar...just move on. I really dont know what people are expceting for £5 but if its causing you that much stress your obviusly in the wrong place.

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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago

Dudley


"For goodness sake. This place is what you make of it. All the peooke moaning about "fake profiles" cant say ive cone across any i know for a fact to be fake. People seem so good at finding fake profiles. If you know they fake...dont message back. Just as someone has no pics or veri..or just because you sent a pic and they never replied does not mean the are fake. Ever think it coukd be something to do with yourselves, your messages or your profile...( thsts not to anyone in particular) If you dont wanna meet someone with no veris, use your filters. I find this site easy to use and fun. I use my filters to avioid messages from people i an not lookking for, if i still get one from someone not on my radar...just move on. I really dont know what people are expceting for £5 but if its causing you that much stress your obviusly in the wrong place."

I think alot of people think fakes are anyone that doesn't respond, doesnt want to meet them etc, I only class people as fakes if they have pictures that aren't of themselves or that are pretending to be someone they aren't. I've found one or two fake profiles, with stolen pictures from porn sites but I don't think there's an many as people claim.

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot


"For goodness sake. This place is what you make of it. All the peooke moaning about "fake profiles" cant say ive cone across any i know for a fact to be fake. People seem so good at finding fake profiles. If you know they fake...dont message back. Just as someone has no pics or veri..or just because you sent a pic and they never replied does not mean the are fake. Ever think it coukd be something to do with yourselves, your messages or your profile...( thsts not to anyone in particular) If you dont wanna meet someone with no veris, use your filters. I find this site easy to use and fun. I use my filters to avioid messages from people i an not lookking for, if i still get one from someone not on my radar...just move on. I really dont know what people are expceting for £5 but if its causing you that much stress your obviusly in the wrong place."

Sooooo much this.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"So they would be paying the membership for 50 days and getting what exactly? And after 50 days they'd be expecting a guaranteed shag?

Don't quite follow the logic...

It could (emphasis here) deter the ones who set up account after account, also may deter those who expect a fuck on joining and every week thereafter. They’dbe Getting little in the first 50 days and that’s the point, a test of mettle if you like.

I’m not saying it’s perfect but it’s ruining the site in my opinion (and despite this profiles age I’ve been here from virtually day one).your frustration with this place could be more to do with your own profile, a person is Always at the end of all profiles and i personally haven't come across a fake profile as a guy so where does this knowledge you have come from? Are you bi? "

No

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"For goodness sake. This place is what you make of it. All the peooke moaning about "fake profiles" cant say ive cone across any i know for a fact to be fake. People seem so good at finding fake profiles. If you know they fake...dont message back. Just as someone has no pics or veri..or just because you sent a pic and they never replied does not mean the are fake. Ever think it coukd be something to do with yourselves, your messages or your profile...( thsts not to anyone in particular) If you dont wanna meet someone with no veris, use your filters. I find this site easy to use and fun. I use my filters to avioid messages from people i an not lookking for, if i still get one from someone not on my radar...just move on. I really dont know what people are expceting for £5 but if its causing you that much stress your obviusly in the wrong place."

No stress at all. Wrong place, that’s possible now I suppose

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By *ollydoesWoman
over a year ago

Shangri-La


"For goodness sake. This place is what you make of it. All the peooke moaning about "fake profiles" cant say ive cone across any i know for a fact to be fake. People seem so good at finding fake profiles. If you know they fake...dont message back. Just as someone has no pics or veri..or just because you sent a pic and they never replied does not mean the are fake. Ever think it coukd be something to do with yourselves, your messages or your profile...( thsts not to anyone in particular) If you dont wanna meet someone with no veris, use your filters. I find this site easy to use and fun. I use my filters to avioid messages from people i an not lookking for, if i still get one from someone not on my radar...just move on. I really dont know what people are expceting for £5 but if its causing you that much stress your obviusly in the wrong place.

I think alot of people think fakes are anyone that doesn't respond, doesnt want to meet them etc, I only class people as fakes if they have pictures that aren't of themselves or that are pretending to be someone they aren't. I've found one or two fake profiles, with stolen pictures from porn sites but I don't think there's an many as people claim. "

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