FabSwingers.com forum: Not looking for single guys...

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I understand why people put the filters on to stop getting swamped by the dreaded single male.

I also understand that people will apply the filter and will browse the single guys, choosing any that tickle their pickle.

However... If you aren't looking for single guys, why are they allowed to browse single guys. They ain't looking, so why search?

I know someone will come up with more valid arguments, but still... It amuses me to think those that aren't looking - are looking

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

I am nosey and look at any profile...

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By *inkySeeKinkyDoWoman
over a year ago

'tween PontyCarlo & CasVegas in West Yorks

Here i will give you my login details and remove all the filters for a day...then you'll understand

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By *he Ring WraithMan
over a year ago

Bradford

Having sat next to a lady friend of mine who was on fab and saw the number of messages and the total dross most of them contained I can sympathise with people using filters, and maybe they are looking for guys, but want to find and message their own choices, if you block men from messaging the site adds 'not looking for single men'

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By *andKBCouple
over a year ago

Plymouth

We've put the filter on for now even though we do occasionally meet single guys. Purely because we are looking for couples and fems at the moment.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not looking for single guys" on a profile often means they don't want to he messaged by single men not that they don't want to meet them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

However... If you aren't looking for single guys, why are they allowed to browse single guys. They ain't looking, so why search?

I know someone will come up with more valid arguments, but still... It amuses me to think those that aren't looking - are looking

Because there is no function on Fab that does exactly the same, but allows the display of a phrase that says "I/We'll choose our own single guys, thanks." And this is because no one has asked for it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

""Not looking for single guys" on a profile often means they don't want to he messaged by single men not that they don't want to meet them"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not looking for single guys" is added automatically when you add the filter to block men from messaging.

So I think if you went into "looking for" on your account and only selected men, it would actually then say...

"Looking for

Not looking for single guys. Men aged 18 to 99"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It comes down to choice. We are looking for certain types of single guys not all single guys.

If we choose to put filters stopping single guys contacting us that's up to us

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's because they want to find them themselves and not get inundated with unwanted messages from unsuitable men x

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

"I understand why people put the filters on to stop getting swamped by the dreaded single male.

I also understand that people will apply the filter and will browse the single guys, choosing any that tickle their pickle.

However... If you aren't looking for single guys, why are they allowed to browse single guys. They ain't looking, so why search?

I know someone will come up with more valid arguments, but still... It amuses me to think those that aren't looking - are looking

You have answered your own question. Some women and couples are looking for a single male. They put the single male block on to stop getting many one line messages per day and so they can do their own looking.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's not only because they want to do their one searching, sometimes it's temporary.

We get 20 messages a day from single guys. We delete those by our own rules, like messaging from far away etc. When it gets to a point of too many simultaneous chats or too many people we are happy to meet waiting, we put the block on. When that decreases we remove the block.

So it's worth checking back on people's profiles because it might only be a temporary block

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My profile list mostly read by couples who are “not looking for single guys”. I suspect they block single guys for all of the well known reasons (crass, obscene etc), and in fact they are selective about their preference. Maybe it should say blocking inbound messages from single guys.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I understand why people put the filters on to stop getting swamped by the dreaded single male.

I also understand that people will apply the filter and will browse the single guys, choosing any that tickle their pickle.

However... If you aren't looking for single guys, why are they allowed to browse single guys. They ain't looking, so why search?

I know someone will come up with more valid arguments, but still... It amuses me to think those that aren't looking - are looking

Op, dreaded single male. They are not so.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think some people think single guys are M who are not married or attached as a MF couple However some who do not want to meet single guys are happy to consider a gang bang or multiple guys some of who may or may not to be single!

So, is the opposite to single... multiple or is the opposite to single ....not married or without long term partner!?

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By *ardiffCoupleNJCouple
over a year ago

Pontypridd/Rhyfelin

"However... If you aren't looking for single guys, why are they allowed to browse single guys. They ain't looking, so why search"

We do look for single guys sometimes. Sometimes we want to do the search rather than wading through the 'meet me in the office after 10.30pm' dross that we get when filters are opened up! Which is why what's written on single guy profiles is important. "Will fill in later" or "what do you want to know" indicates no real desire for any sort of connection, so it'll be a pass!!

Similarly 15 veris but all hidden adds nothing. 15 profiles we can read indicates what age range you meet, what body types you like etc etc. If you've only met 22 year old single pretty young things....we're probably not for you.

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By *astyEricMan
over a year ago

Hull

Don't see a problem, it's their, her or his account they can do whatever they want, and if they will meet single guy, so what it's their choice .

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

The message filters etc are used by people to get the best from Fab, dependent upon the site options. Op, you got it in one, as to why others prevent single men but look for the ones that they like, or potentially meet them in clubs etc. Few of us have the time to really trawl through tons of messages from people who are not matched to our tastes, so it's intelligent and respectful to use the site's service features, to get the most for everyone. If users who prevented incoming messages couldn't view single mens' profiles, then fewer would ever get any messages! Surely almost none of you would prefer that

The best people to determine whether someone is potentially attractive is the person viewing a profile. Many guys conversely talk of the hassle of carefully crafting something more than 'fancy a fuck' but rarely getting a response. The current options help to minimise wasted effort. Would anyone prefer to invest time into messaging more people that will never, ever have any interest in them, based on their current profile?

This emphasises that guys who are struggling could well benefit from ensuring that their profile is as close to the best at selling them to others and kept up to date. As they are here for longer, updating photos is really helpful, as older pics can deter others. If your interests change, or experience helps you to learn something, then let your profile reflect this too.

Many would love more or updated site features. Perhaps some would like some of them renamed, so that they better reflect how many are used them now, eg, 'not meeting single men', which the op mentions, could perhaps have a different description, when people are meeting them but not interested in getting contacted by them.

The site will generally be slanted, such that single men have a tougher time, on average, than other genders or couples. Once this is accepted, then it's only about continuing to use the site or other swinging facilities, including clubs, to augment your experiences here.

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By *entakuruMan
over a year ago

Exeter

I have absolutely no interest in men but I still check out profiles of people who have been verified by women I am interested in. For profile tips as much as anything

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why does it not say 'not looking for couples' as I've filtered them out?

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By *randmrsnawtyCouple
over a year ago

PO 36

""Not looking for single guys" on a profile often means they don't want to he messaged by single men not that they don't want to meet them"

Exactly...

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