FabSwingers.com forum: So, the timewasting thing...Maybe a solution?

By *ickygirl41 OP Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow

Was chatting to a real life friend the other day and fab came up (they used to be on here) we talked about those REALLY annoying folk.

You know...the ones who arrange meets and all is well up until a little while before and they suddenly go silent and it quickly becomes obvious they're not coming.

You shaved your fucking legs, maybe you booked and paid for a hotel room, you might be trans or CD and it took you A LOT of time and effort to be ready.

We know for some people it's nerves, maybe for others there's fear of not being able to "perform" I've heard tale of attached people having a change of heart and deciding not to cheat on SO's or lie to potential play partners.

Then there's the cunts. They do it all the time and don't care. Maybe it's working out a grudge against swingers or kinksters, maybe they just want to see the world burn?

But how to differentiate? And alert others? So our cunning plan was for invisible red flags on profile.

If someone ghosts, you report to admin. They read your report and decide if it's flagworthy.

Their profile is given (by admin only) a red flag that cannot yet be seen by us mere mortals.

If they do it again they get a second one.

Third time and a wee red flag appears on their profile OR they get a timed ban from accessing fab.

This method SHOULD prevent someone being falsely accused. It also should prevent someone being hassle for reporting as it would take three reports to activate.

It also could be used to alert admin and site users to dangerous members?

Someone stalks you or is physically abusive, theft, coercion, b l a c k m a i l etc if they get three unique warning reports....

We were a bit d*unk so I was hoping to get sober fabbers to judge if it's a good or workable idea of if we were just full of it.

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By *ilk_TreMan
over a year ago

Wherever the party is!

"Was chatting to a real life friend the other day and fab came up (they used to be on here) we talked about those REALLY annoying folk.

You know...the ones who arrange meets and all is well up until a little while before and they suddenly go silent and it quickly becomes obvious they're not coming.

You shaved your fucking legs, maybe you booked and paid for a hotel room, you might be trans or CD and it took you A LOT of time and effort to be ready.

Then there's the cunts. They do it all the time and don't care. Maybe it's working out a grudge against swingers or kinksters, maybe they just want to see the world burn?

But how to differentiate? And alert others? So our cunning plan was for invisible red flags on profile.

If someone ghosts, you report to admin. They read your report and decide if it's flagworthy.

Their profile is given (by admin only) a red flag that cannot yet be seen by us mere mortals.

If they do it again they get a second one.

Third time and a wee red flag appears on their profile OR they get a timed ban from accessing fab.

This method SHOULD prevent someone being falsely accused. It also should prevent someone being hassle for reporting as it would take three reports to activate.

It also could be used to alert admin and site users to dangerous members?

Someone stalks you or is physically abusive, theft, coercion, b l a c k m a i l etc if they get three unique warning reports....

We were a bit d*unk so I was hoping to get sober fabbers to judge if it's a good or workable idea of if we were just full of it.

That's...not a bad idea actually...

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By *ewkesbury cowboyMan
over a year ago

Tewkesbury

A 3 strikes and your out system. Bloody good idea

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Was chatting to a real life friend the other day and fab came up (they used to be on here) we talked about those REALLY annoying folk.

You know...the ones who arrange meets and all is well up until a little while before and they suddenly go silent and it quickly becomes obvious they're not coming.

You shaved your fucking legs, maybe you booked and paid for a hotel room, you might be trans or CD and it took you A LOT of time and effort to be ready.

Then there's the cunts. They do it all the time and don't care. Maybe it's working out a grudge against swingers or kinksters, maybe they just want to see the world burn?

But how to differentiate? And alert others? So our cunning plan was for invisible red flags on profile.

If someone ghosts, you report to admin. They read your report and decide if it's flagworthy.

Their profile is given (by admin only) a red flag that cannot yet be seen by us mere mortals.

If they do it again they get a second one.

Third time and a wee red flag appears on their profile OR they get a timed ban from accessing fab.

This method SHOULD prevent someone being falsely accused. It also should prevent someone being hassle for reporting as it would take three reports to activate.

It also could be used to alert admin and site users to dangerous members?

Someone stalks you or is physically abusive, theft, coercion, b l a c k m a i l etc if they get three unique warning reports....

We were a bit d*unk so I was hoping to get sober fabbers to judge if it's a good or workable idea of if we were just full of it.

I think that’s a splendid idea.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Admin already have a system in place for repeat offenders

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Here is an explanation from Admin from another thread on how they deal with reports.

******Just a quick note. If people report others and we can verify that they have broken site rules, we always take action (either a first and final warning, partially suspended account, fully suspended, mixture of the above).

Every single report sent via the REPORT link is reviewed. Clearly it's not in our interests to have people on here who are bad for the site. Equally we need to verify what has been reported and be fair to those who have been reported.

Admin

PS. we never provide feedback on what has happened. It's just not practical given that we get 100s of reports a day.

Here is what the page says after a report has been submitted:

Your feedback has been saved.

A website admin will shortly review your feedback and take the necessary action. After reviewing the evidence available to us, we may disable an account, remove a user, disable certain aspects of that user's account or issue a warning.

By leaving feedback you help improve the site for everyone who uses it. Thank you.******

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By *ultry SuccubusTV/TS
over a year ago

London

"Admin already have a system in place for repeat offenders"

I'm sure they have.

But I think this suggestion involves a visible warning flag after a few reports.

I don't think the admin has to do anything differently except to let out a visible warning flag before the profile got suspended.

Might open to abuse but worth a consideration I think?

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

As I said Admin already have a system in place for repeat offenders, including a log of previous rule breaking only seen by Admin

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By *rimson_RoseWoman
over a year ago

Tamworth

How does that prevent the system abused though? It doesn't stop me from saying someone didn't turn up when they did or when we hadn't actually made plans - oh we did it via kik/whatsapp... nothing for admin to go off and it could be anyone if you provide a screenshot of your conversation.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Admin need evidence on the site to deal with any complaints

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Here is an explanation from Admin from another thread on how they deal with reports.

Admin

PS. we never provide feedback on what has happened. It's just not practical given that we get 100s of reports a day.

Here is what the page says after a report has been submitted:

Your feedback has been saved.

By leaving feedback you help improve the site for everyone who uses it. Thank you.******"

I've reported stuff to admin and never heard anything back, not even the above

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

You don't hear anything back as the post says.

You do however get a message after you have submitted a report saying

"Your feedback has been saved.

By leaving feedback you help improve the site for everyone who uses it. Thank you"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You don't hear anything back as the post says.

You do however get a message after you have submitted a report saying

"Your feedback has been saved.

By leaving feedback you help improve the site for everyone who uses it. Thank you""

I can read. My post stated I didn't even get that message

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How does that prevent the system abused though? It doesn't stop me from saying someone didn't turn up when they did or when we hadn't actually made plans - oh we did it via kik/whatsapp... nothing for admin to go off and it could be anyone if you provide a screenshot of your conversation. "

Agreed easy to falsely accuse someone and get them banned out of spite

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"You don't hear anything back as the post says.

You do however get a message after you have submitted a report saying

"Your feedback has been saved.

By leaving feedback you help improve the site for everyone who uses it. Thank you"

I can read. My post stated I didn't even get that message "

You do, you get the message on the screen when you submit a report. report my profile as a test and you will see it after you submit

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By *entralscotscpl7Couple
over a year ago

Falkirk

"Was chatting to a real life friend the other day and fab came up (they used to be on here) we talked about those REALLY annoying folk.

You know...the ones who arrange meets and all is well up until a little while before and they suddenly go silent and it quickly becomes obvious they're not coming.

You shaved your fucking legs, maybe you booked and paid for a hotel room, you might be trans or CD and it took you A LOT of time and effort to be ready.

Then there's the cunts. They do it all the time and don't care. Maybe it's working out a grudge against swingers or kinksters, maybe they just want to see the world burn?

But how to differentiate? And alert others? So our cunning plan was for invisible red flags on profile.

If someone ghosts, you report to admin. They read your report and decide if it's flagworthy.

Their profile is given (by admin only) a red flag that cannot yet be seen by us mere mortals.

If they do it again they get a second one.

Third time and a wee red flag appears on their profile OR they get a timed ban from accessing fab.

This method SHOULD prevent someone being falsely accused. It also should prevent someone being hassle for reporting as it would take three reports to activate.

It also could be used to alert admin and site users to dangerous members?

Someone stalks you or is physically abusive, theft, coercion, b l a c k m a i l etc if they get three unique warning reports....

We were a bit d*unk so I was hoping to get sober fabbers to judge if it's a good or workable idea of if we were just full of it.

Nope. System is fine as it is.

Maybe be more selective of your potential meets if you are having a continuous let downs.

As admin have said they look into all reported profiles and deal with it accordingly.

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

Not so good if someone with a grudge sets up three profiles and falsely reports you from each of them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The evidence trail is checked so malicious reports can be dealt with correctly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Was chatting to a real life friend the other day and fab came up (they used to be on here) we talked about those REALLY annoying folk.

You know...the ones who arrange meets and all is well up until a little while before and they suddenly go silent and it quickly becomes obvious they're not coming.

You shaved your fucking legs, maybe you booked and paid for a hotel room, you might be trans or CD and it took you A LOT of time and effort to be ready.

Then there's the cunts. They do it all the time and don't care. Maybe it's working out a grudge against swingers or kinksters, maybe they just want to see the world burn?

But how to differentiate? And alert others? So our cunning plan was for invisible red flags on profile.

If someone ghosts, you report to admin. They read your report and decide if it's flagworthy.

Their profile is given (by admin only) a red flag that cannot yet be seen by us mere mortals.

If they do it again they get a second one.

Third time and a wee red flag appears on their profile OR they get a timed ban from accessing fab.

This method SHOULD prevent someone being falsely accused. It also should prevent someone being hassle for reporting as it would take three reports to activate.

It also could be used to alert admin and site users to dangerous members?

Someone stalks you or is physically abusive, theft, coercion, b l a c k m a i l etc if they get three unique warning reports....

We were a bit d*unk so I was hoping to get sober fabbers to judge if it's a good or workable idea of if we were just full of it.

Yup I'm gonna say this is a bang on idea as I seem to get all the timewasters and no genuine people

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Fab can only rely on users reporting others for not turning up - and their secret system probably includes gradations of service abuse, a bit like driving license penalty points, ultimately losing ability to use Fab. Other users know of possible problems with users if they are unable to reach them.

I did suggest something like a traffic light system some time ago, where profiles could have green, amber, red lights showing, subject to your idea, possibly earning green by length of usage, verifications and lack of negative feedback. Not many were that impressed.

Part of the trouble is that appearing to take away some responsibility from each of us, to fully evaluate users, could lead to us each taking poorer quality decisions, from perhaps thinking the site was more reliable than it is. It could possibly result in someone taking greater risks, leaving them even more vulnerable than without this type of feature. The owners would not ever want anyone to be harmed, they are responsible operators of a site that supports people getting to know and meet others in circumstances where they may be subject to trouble that some people inflict on others.

The other strength of a system that works secretly, with hidden rules, methods of evaluating people etc, is that it can help to prevent abusive people from trying to circumvent these controls. There will still be those who try to evade Fabs rules but it makes it harder for them to crack the system.

Those of us - the majority - who are decent and respectful of others, would love to have greater ease to out those who would abuse the trust and investments that are made, as you've outlined op. I'm unsure what the ideal solutions are though.

In the meantime, minimize your risks and potential losses, as well as you are able to. Do this, whilst continuing to report anyone that breaks site rules or when you have suspicions.

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