FabSwingers.com forum: Reply percentage meter

By *ustparty OP Couple
over a year ago

Blackwater

We saw a feature on another site which indicated the percentage reply rate.

This would be a nice feature as it really annoying sending a nice personal message (i.e. not copy / paste) as an initial contact and not receiving any kind of reply. It would save a lot of time messaging people that are unlikely to reply.

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

What if 99% of messages recieved were from people that had'nt read your profile leaving your reply % really low for no other reason than why waste time responding to someone thats not read your profile or is completely out of the criteria you have set?

What if all the replies you gave were a no thanks? is that going to make anyone feel better in anyway or make that person more genuine?

All it means is they reply even if its a negative response,does'nt make them any more or any less genuine or that you're going to get a meet out of it

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By *ustparty OP Couple
over a year ago

Blackwater

We get about 2-3 initial contacts per week so doesn't take much time. An acknowlegement even if no thanks is polite.

If someone approached you in the street and asked the time would you blank them. People can readily rude while hiding behind the internet.

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By *iceguydaveMan
over a year ago

Monmouth

I'm with HPC on this - given how people use the site, I can't see any real benefit to introducing such a display.

Anyway, I'd suggest that it's not important how someone might have responded (or not) to all the other messages they've had, what's important is whether/how they respond to YOURS.

There's a truism from the early days of computing called GIGO - Garbage In, Garbage Out. If 99% of people are sending messages out that frankly don't deserve a response, then chances are that's exactly what they'll get. (I'm not suggesting the OP is guilty of this, by the way!!).

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

If someone approached you in the street and asked the time would you blank them. People can readily rude while hiding behind the internet.

Of course I would'nt ignore someone in the street asking me the time,I may ignore someone that comes up and asks do you wanna fuck tonight as im in your area though

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By *ustparty OP Couple
over a year ago

Blackwater

Of course I would'nt ignore someone in the street asking me the time,I may ignore someone that comes up and asks do you wanna fuck tonight as im in your area though

Never had any couples send us a message like that. lol - must be doing something wrong.

Would you be happier if percentage meter was split into categories. Still think you should ignore anyone in real life or online.

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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago

Hull

"What if 99% of messages recieved were from people that had'nt read your profile leaving your reply % really low for no other reason than why waste time responding to someone thats not read your profile or is completely out of the criteria you have set?

What if all the replies you gave were a no thanks? is that going to make anyone feel better in anyway or make that person more genuine?

All it means is they reply even if its a negative response,does'nt make them any more or any less genuine or that you're going to get a meet out of it

I totally agree here too.

Having a Percentage Meter wouldn't really be of any sense.

I know of Ladies and Couples who have posted up a general response at the start of their Profile, that they've been inundated with messages and couldn't get around to replying to everyone. They may be the most genuine posters on the site, but since they don't have the time to get back to everyone, does that make them someone to avoid, because the % Meter says otherwise?

It is a piece of techie wizardry we don't need.

Stick to what we've got already; it may not be perfect at times, but it works.

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By *ustparty OP Couple
over a year ago

Blackwater

How many messages do people actually get? We only get 2-3 initial responses a week which are easy to reply to.

Can't believe anybody is inundated to that degree that they can give a simple reply in order to make the world a nicer place. (Watch "Pay it Forward" with Kevin Spacey, Helen Hunt and Haley Joel Osment. to get what we mean).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

as a single woman i can get up to 15 messages a day, most clearly havnt read my profile and my profile states that i will not reply if im not interested, i simply dont have the time, whereas on my couples profile we probably only get 2-3 a week as well x

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By *j_markCouple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Totteridge/Whetstone

We tried this on another site at another time and it didn't make the site any better, in fact it had unintended consequences.

e.g. some users felt obliged to answer everyone and felt it a chore

And the majority of people took no notice of it anyway (what does it mean if someone has a low %age of replies; they got a lot of untargeted mail from people; might be a good sign that they only reply selectively?)

Admin x

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By *carletRomanceCouple
over a year ago

glasgow

Why the big fuss over replies of late?

We reply if the message is polite, has taken note of our profile or seems genuine.

However, we get lots of copied and pasted ones, guys asking us to read their profile and mesaage them, general abuse, harassment and ones that clearly haven’t read our profile (or have read and have decided to just ignore and have a go anyway). These types of messages don’t deserve a reply - a % meter would punish us for ignoring what deserves to be ignored.

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By *raigCouple
over a year ago

cardiff

We get lots of messages asking for meets from men when our profile states we only meet couples. AS they have not read the profile we just delete without answering. Why should we be forced to reply to these men just to avoid looking like time wasters

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By *obletonMan
over a year ago

A Home Among The Woodland Creatures

this thread reminds me of a late night brainfart I had recently.

The FabSwingers Meet-o-meter.

something that members can fill out - possibly completely anonymously - with their details (age, height, build, (real) marital staus, travel, accom, pictures, etc) and status, which then compares them to existing members and gives them an appraisal of their chances on here in terms of meets (based on meet verifications) and their likely response rate, and ways that they can improve both - I'm sure the stats are there on the site to be used if need be.

would save a lot of time in the forums with the - why won't anyone meet me / answer my emails? questions - just direct them to the meet-o-meter for some clues

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"would save a lot of time in the forums with the - why won't anyone meet me / answer my emails? questions - just direct them to the meet-o-meter for some clues"

You reckon?

We'd just have even more moaners complaining that their response rate isn't higher.

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By *obletonMan
over a year ago

A Home Among The Woodland Creatures

"You reckon?

We'd just have even more moaners complaining that their response rate isn't higher."

well I did say it was a brainfart

But I don't see how they could complain if they are presented with hard data which shows (for example) what the overall response rate is to people of their gender/status/etc so they can see if they are ahead or behind the curve - and (potentially) shows them what others who have better response rates do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why the big fuss over replies of late?

We reply if the message is polite, has taken note of our profile or seems genuine.

Agreed. We will only respond to those that have read our profile and actually understood what it says and fit in with the criteria. Even if we have to give a negative response they get a reply.

Those that are lazy/pushy or chance their luck get nothing back... this % reply meter would punish us too

Thank heavens admin have tried and tested it before!

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By *obletonMan
over a year ago

A Home Among The Woodland Creatures

I'm in general agreement with most folks on here that a reply % meter for individual members could potentially cause problems.

But I do think though that being able to see what the overall percentage of introductary messages that are replied to for people of your gender is, and being able to compare that to the response rate you receive for your own messages would be really useful.

For one thing, I'm sure that a lot of people who feel they might be getting a lack of response, might in fact be getting a better than average response rate but don't realise because they have nothing to compare it to.

I know I keep harping on about setting people's expectations for this site at a realistic level - but that's because I really do think it's important.

The reason why people can sometimes get bitter and beligerent isn't necessarily because of lack of meets or lack of response, it's because their EXPECTATIONS of meets and response don't match their experience - its the dissonance between the two that causes their dissappointment over the outcome - not the outcome itself.

If they have their expectations spelled out from the start by being very clear that will be doing very WELL to get a better than 5% reply rate, or more than 2 meets a year (or whatever the average numbers might be) then you avoid that problem and create a more relaxed and productive atmosphere.

does that make any sense at all?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We get about 2-3 initial contacts per week so doesn't take much time. An acknowlegement even if no thanks is polite.

If someone approached you in the street and asked the time would you blank them. People can readily rude while hiding behind the internet.

I get about 40 messages a day, that's with filters on. I don't consider myself rude but no way do I reply to even half of my mail, as is my right. So I'd be totally against the idea. I don't see why I should look bad because of the actions of others.

How I do wish people would stop judging the way others use the site...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

could we see what room a person is chatting in instead of a bubble ?

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By *heRainManMan
over a year ago

Warrington & Glasgow

"could we see what room a person is chatting in instead of a bubble ?

"
Pasting this request into a number of different unrelated threads isn't going to make it happen any faster and, I'd suggest, is likely to get you a forum ban.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"could we see what room a person is chatting in instead of a bubble ?

Pasting this request into a number of different unrelated threads isn't going to make it happen any faster and, I'd suggest, is likely to get you a forum ban."

The man was confused of where to put his post and posted in the right place in the end. Two posts , one being on an unrelated thread isn't against rules....threads don't always stay on track anyway.

Let's welcome the newbies rather than put them off with threats of bans eh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think this discussion is going down the path that so so many end doing.

The problem is it's more of a grey area, not everyone who gets ignored has failed to read/acknowledge the profile of whoever they're messaging.

I see no point in writing an essay only for it to be possibly ignored, that said 'fancy a fuck?' messages are obviously useless. I try to make it clear I've read the profile and reply accordingly but as concisely as possible.

Best way to deal with not getting a response is to not expect one in the first place, otherwise you'll drive yourself mad.

A reply rate might discourage unsolicited mail but then again men are men.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Most people who message us, dont actually bother to read our profile in the first place - which is Rude, and Disrespectful.

So why should we be forced to mail back thanks but no thanks, to get a good score? If people cant be bothered to read our profile fully in the first place then we have no intention of wasting time to reply to them - delete/block.

Maybe we ought to reply back.. saying "thanks for wasting our time. Due to your lack of reading skills and incomprehension "the computer says no" "

Of course we will always reply to someone that has read our profile fully - even if it is a thanks but no thanks - as that is polite. Although thats very rare we have to do that.

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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest

So the people who do reply to random messages will show a good response rate and will probably get even more random messages because more people will message them assuming that they have a better chance of getting a reply...

errrm thanks, but no thanks

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