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Timewasters & 'Fake' Profiles

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

We have had more than our fair share of time wasters and people finding the need to post 'fake profiles' ... Whilst we understand there can be the odd occasion where situations arise where meets can't be kept ... and for genuine reasons at that ... but we feel there should be a 'Name and Shame' part to the site ... where people can look to see if they have a good meet record!!! Almost like a 'Credit Scoring'!!

Members can then read this and decide IF they wish to commence with a possible meet!!

We have been advised that 'verifications' can be falsified ..... We can't see that personally .... as it's more than it's worth for members to falsify verifications ....

We understand that this may be difficult to 'Police' ... but when you spend 2 hours getting ready (and I think most of us women do!) and preparing yourself physically and mentally for a meet ... to be let down last minute is really not funny!!

Seems we are not on our own regarding this situation ..... Can the 'Admin Team' please look into the possibility of sorting this problem which seems to be rife on here??? ... Thanking you in anticipation

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent


"We have had more than our fair share of time wasters and people finding the need to post 'fake profiles' ... Whilst we understand there can be the odd occasion where situations arise where meets can't be kept ... and for genuine reasons at that ... but we feel there should be a 'Name and Shame' part to the site ... where people can look to see if they have a good meet record!!! Almost like a 'Credit Scoring'!!

Members can then read this and decide IF they wish to commence with a possible meet!!

We have been advised that 'verifications' can be falsified ..... We can't see that personally .... as it's more than it's worth for members to falsify verifications ....

We understand that this may be difficult to 'Police' ... but when you spend 2 hours getting ready (and I think most of us women do!) and preparing yourself physically and mentally for a meet ... to be let down last minute is really not funny!!

Seems we are not on our own regarding this situation ..... Can the 'Admin Team' please look into the possibility of sorting this problem which seems to be rife on here??? ... Thanking you in anticipation "

It's been suggested countless times before but the main problem is there is no way to check it, I could name and shame you saying that you didn't turn up to an arranged meet when we've never even spoken and there would be no way to prove/disprove otherwise. Disgruntled people who have been turned down could name and shame just for the hell of it and numerous other reasons why a name and shame or scoring system won't ever work on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Whilst I agree with the sentiments of this idea, I think it would be impossible to police. If it was like a rating system, like for example when you buy a kettle on the Argos website, people would end up rating you a low 1 or 2 if you didn't want to meet them or if you didn't reply to their message within 60 seconds. Genuine members then would have their rating adversely affected because of this...

Agreed though about all the hassle and disappointment when a meet doesn't happen at the last minute but as you point out, it would be near impossible to police using a rating system I think

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your profile is very clear, what we give out we always get back in one way or another.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We have had more than our fair share of time wasters and people finding the need to post 'fake profiles' ... Whilst we understand there can be the odd occasion where situations arise where meets can't be kept ... and for genuine reasons at that ... but we feel there should be a 'Name and Shame' part to the site ... where people can look to see if they have a good meet record!!! Almost like a 'Credit Scoring'!!

Members can then read this and decide IF they wish to commence with a possible meet!!

We have been advised that 'verifications' can be falsified ..... We can't see that personally .... as it's more than it's worth for members to falsify verifications ....

We understand that this may be difficult to 'Police' ... but when you spend 2 hours getting ready (and I think most of us women do!) and preparing yourself physically and mentally for a meet ... to be let down last minute is really not funny!!

Seems we are not on our own regarding this situation ..... Can the 'Admin Team' please look into the possibility of sorting this problem which seems to be rife on here??? ... Thanking you in anticipation "

After last week you would be top of the list , how dare you come on here and moan about timewasters when you didn't turn up as arranged for our meet

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thanks for your response ... and we take on board what you say .... but I (fem) seriously doubt that people would be 'sick enough' to post untruths about a fellow member just for the sake of it!!

Perhaps there could be a chance to post an 'explanation' if a discruntled member does post a 'name and shame' ..

Perhaps I'm being naieve here

Some people are lucky ... and never get 'messed about' ... others seem to be and get regular 'timewasters' .... xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We have had more than our fair share of time wasters and people finding the need to post 'fake profiles' ... Whilst we understand there can be the odd occasion where situations arise where meets can't be kept ... and for genuine reasons at that ... but we feel there should be a 'Name and Shame' part to the site ... where people can look to see if they have a good meet record!!! Almost like a 'Credit Scoring'!!

Members can then read this and decide IF they wish to commence with a possible meet!!

We have been advised that 'verifications' can be falsified ..... We can't see that personally .... as it's more than it's worth for members to falsify verifications ....

We understand that this may be difficult to 'Police' ... but when you spend 2 hours getting ready (and I think most of us women do!) and preparing yourself physically and mentally for a meet ... to be let down last minute is really not funny!!

Seems we are not on our own regarding this situation ..... Can the 'Admin Team' please look into the possibility of sorting this problem which seems to be rife on here??? ... Thanking you in anticipation "

I've seen loads false verifications

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By *cottishrichMan
over a year ago

Here and there


"Thanks for your response ... and we take on board what you say .... but I (fem) seriously doubt that people would be 'sick enough' to post untruths about a fellow member just for the sake of it!!

Perhaps there could be a chance to post an 'explanation' if a discruntled member does post a 'name and shame' ..

Perhaps I'm being naieve here

Some people are lucky ... and never get 'messed about' ... others seem to be and get regular 'timewasters' .... xx

"

You're sadly mistaken if you think people wouldn't be "sick enough" to lie online where they are pretty much anonymous. Yes, you are being very naieve.

As for getting messed about by timewasters, perhaps it's the selection process of the people who get messed about that's at fault rather than the site itself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We have had more than our fair share of time wasters and people finding the need to post 'fake profiles' ... Whilst we understand there can be the odd occasion where situations arise where meets can't be kept ... and for genuine reasons at that ... but we feel there should be a 'Name and Shame' part to the site ... where people can look to see if they have a good meet record!!! Almost like a 'Credit Scoring'!!

Members can then read this and decide IF they wish to commence with a possible meet!!

We have been advised that 'verifications' can be falsified ..... We can't see that personally .... as it's more than it's worth for members to falsify verifications ....

We understand that this may be difficult to 'Police' ... but when you spend 2 hours getting ready (and I think most of us women do!) and preparing yourself physically and mentally for a meet ... to be let down last minute is really not funny!!

Seems we are not on our own regarding this situation ..... Can the 'Admin Team' please look into the possibility of sorting this problem which seems to be rife on here??? ... Thanking you in anticipation

It's been suggested countless times before but the main problem is there is no way to check it, I could name and shame you saying that you didn't turn up to an arranged meet when we've never even spoken and there would be no way to prove/disprove otherwise. Disgruntled people who have been turned down could name and shame just for the hell of it and numerous other reasons why a name and shame or scoring system won't ever work on here. "

How about a calendar system, both parties input agreed meet date and time into calendar, that would serve as proof, and surely there would be at least a couple inbox messages to show contact made and meet arranged

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 29/11/13 12:20:23]

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

I think if there are people that are vindictive enough to send nasty messages when they are turned down then there is definitely the possibility of them leaving a bad score just to be arseholes as well

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Re Moodymoo CFW ... Hahahahahaha .... Point taken!!! lol .... but this is where we would say ... sorry .... We never arranged a meet .... we only meet roughly 8 miles within our area and you live way out of that area lol .... and please prove we arranged a meet ... via messages on here ... or record of texts and calls!! .... Difficult I agree hun xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Thanks for your response ... and we take on board what you say .... but I (fem) seriously doubt that people would be 'sick enough' to post untruths about a fellow member just for the sake of it!!

Perhaps there could be a chance to post an 'explanation' if a discruntled member does post a 'name and shame' ..

Perhaps I'm being naieve here

Some people are lucky ... and never get 'messed about' ... others seem to be and get regular 'timewasters' .... xx

"

I think you are as you said naive , name and shame would never work.

If anyone seems to think they get regular timewasters then it is down to them to look at what they are doing or not doing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think if there are people that are vindictive enough to send nasty messages when they are turned down then there is definitely the possibility of them leaving a bad score just to be arseholes as well "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its about unhappy wives/partners, point scoring, its a sex site in cyber space, not sunday school, like attracts like

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Re Moodymoo CFW ... Hahahahahaha .... Point taken!!! lol .... but this is where we would say ... sorry .... We never arranged a meet .... we only meet roughly 8 miles within our area and you live way out of that area lol .... and please prove we arranged a meet ... via messages on here ... or record of texts and calls!! .... Difficult I agree hun xx"

Oh and who you going to prove the arrangement of meets to?

Oh hang on ...admin oh admin can you please arrange all my meets for me so you can by pass the time wasters , can you also turn up meet the meet and ensure I'm going to like them as well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We have had more than our fair share of time wasters and people finding the need to post 'fake profiles' ... Whilst we understand there can be the odd occasion where situations arise where meets can't be kept ... and for genuine reasons at that ... but we feel there should be a 'Name and Shame' part to the site ... where people can look to see if they have a good meet record!!! Almost like a 'Credit Scoring'!!

Members can then read this and decide IF they wish to commence with a possible meet!!

We have been advised that 'verifications' can be falsified ..... We can't see that personally .... as it's more than it's worth for members to falsify verifications ....

We understand that this may be difficult to 'Police' ... but when you spend 2 hours getting ready (and I think most of us women do!) and preparing yourself physically and mentally for a meet ... to be let down last minute is really not funny!!

Seems we are not on our own regarding this situation ..... Can the 'Admin Team' please look into the possibility of sorting this problem which seems to be rife on here??? ... Thanking you in anticipation

It's been suggested countless times before but the main problem is there is no way to check it, I could name and shame you saying that you didn't turn up to an arranged meet when we've never even spoken and there would be no way to prove/disprove otherwise. Disgruntled people who have been turned down could name and shame just for the hell of it and numerous other reasons why a name and shame or scoring system won't ever work on here.

How about a calendar system, both parties input agreed meet date and time into calendar, that would serve as proof, and surely there would be at least a couple inbox messages to show contact made and meet arranged"

I'm sorry but that for me is just plain silly, when I want to meet the last thing I want to do is start filling in paperwork. I do my checks arrange a meet and turn up , job done.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

How about a calendar system, both parties input agreed meet date and time into calendar, that would serve as proof, and surely there would be at least a couple inbox messages to show contact made and meet arranged ...

Great idea ... x

Thanks everyone for all your comments .... I was prompted to posting this by friends on here (a couple like us) ... who seems to be having a bad time of this site right now .... I was merely supporting them!! But at the same time ... expressing our concerns too

Suppose it's a case of if we don't like it ... we leave lol xxxx

We are not stressed out by it ... but we do get annoyed when it happens to us xxxx

As for the comment about being 'more selective' .... we are very careful who we select ... but until a meet is arranged .. how can you tell! People seem really nice .... and some say they choose to 'hide' verifications ... as they don't want to - their choice

We are not new to the swinging scene at all ... xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What about a system where if you get to a point where you both agree to meet you click on a bit of their profile and it only shows up if both parties click on the other committing to a meet. Only at this point are you then open to the 'argos' style review so people can't give you bad reviews if you just annoy them in a msg. Like ebay used to you can also have tge option of one response message to any negative feedback to put your side across and then future potential people can then make their own mind up. It would sort out any timewasters as if they were a fake or timewaster they wouldn't open themselves to the risk of a bad review by clicking on 'agreed meet' button. With a bit of tweaking and thought something like this might work?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Good idea!! There will always be some who will use and abuse anything or any system really .. and it would be difficult to do ... but yeah ... Good idea!!

Re: What about a system where if you get to a point where you both agree to meet you click on a bit of their profile and it only shows up if both parties click on the other committing to a meet. Only at this point are you then open to the 'argos' style review so people can't give you bad reviews if you just annoy them in a msg. Like ebay used to you can also have tge option of one response message to any negative feedback to put your side across and then future potential people can then make their own mind up. It would sort out any timewasters as if they were a fake or timewaster they wouldn't open themselves to the risk of a bad review by clicking on 'agreed meet' button. With a bit of tweaking and thought something like this might work?

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By *cottishrichMan
over a year ago

Here and there


"What about a system where if you get to a point where you both agree to meet you click on a bit of their profile and it only shows up if both parties click on the other committing to a meet. Only at this point are you then open to the 'argos' style review so people can't give you bad reviews if you just annoy them in a msg. Like ebay used to you can also have tge option of one response message to any negative feedback to put your side across and then future potential people can then make their own mind up. It would sort out any timewasters as if they were a fake or timewaster they wouldn't open themselves to the risk of a bad review by clicking on 'agreed meet' button. With a bit of tweaking and thought something like this might work? "

But a true fake or time waster wouldn't have a problem with negative feedback, they'd simply make a new profile and start again.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Good point!!!! x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Like I said ... we are NOT new to the scene ... I think it's the luck of the draw!! lol .... Some people are very convincing liars lol ... then when the crunch comes ...... they can't see it through

Believe me ... I'm not naieve lol .. and hubby certainly isn't!!

He is more laid back about it though xxx

But this post has certainly got people expressing their views ... which is good!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

wont make a difference

fakes n time wasters is a way of life for this site

just block n move on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have not had a problem with getting let down on here and we both feel the systems in place here already work perfectly well. If more things were added it would mean higher costs and having to vet more admin. It's up to us as well as admin and the site owners to police the site, have you reported all these time wasters?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We have not had a problem with getting let down on here and we both feel the systems in place here already work perfectly well. If more things were added it would mean higher costs and having to vet more admin. It's up to us as well as admin and the site owners to police the site, have you reported all these time wasters? "

We're the same, haven' really been bothered with timewasters but we usually meet for a social meet first to see the other couple, hang out for a bit, see if we like them personally as well as physically and take it from there. Just our own personal choice of course.

Genuine last minute cancellations can happen as well. We had to cancel last weekend as J came home from work with a cold sore and we felt terrible about it. The other couple were fantastic about it but i can see how they could have also been pissed off but because we'd met them socially beforehand, they knew we were genuine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

never met a timewaster yet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its all part of the game..

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo


"Thanks for your response ... and we take on board what you say .... but I (fem) seriously doubt that people would be 'sick enough' to post untruths about a fellow member just for the sake of it!!

"

Don't you believe it, there are some nasty and vindictive people about and probably why Admin have said there will never be a name and shame option.

The best thing to do is report anything untoward and let Admin take a look for you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

have reported nasty people on here but yet still on site an posting away

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo


"have reported nasty people on here but yet still on site an posting away "

If their posts don't break rules they can still post.

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By *j_markCouple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Totteridge/Whetstone

Loads of good reasons why we don't have name + shame which have been done to death on the forums many times.

If you've arranged a meet and someone doesn't turn up, report the profile. Ditto if you see a profile you think is fake and needs looking at

Admin x

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