FabSwingers.com forum: Agree meet button

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I've been thinking about all the threads and comments on the forums regarding timewasters and no shows...

Could an option be implemented so that two profiles could agree a meet with each other before they actually meet, so that if there was then a no show, someone would be able to post this feedback without the system being open to abuse.

Not sure if I have explained myself well, but that is the basic jist of it...

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

It has been suggested before many times. I think the problem is people can press 'agree meet' when one hasn't been agreed by both parties.

Anyway, you can report someone as a no show, which strikes me as adequate.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think the problem is people can press 'agree meet' when one hasn't been agreed by both parties."

I meant that, after verbally agreeing it only takes one person to initiate it and then the other has to accept..

"Anyway, you can report someone as a no show, which strikes me as adequate."

I did not know this, which kind of makes the idea moot I guess anyway!

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"Anyway, you can report someone as a no show, which strikes me as adequate.

I did not know this, which kind of makes the idea moot I guess anyway!"

You've obviously never been stood up, which is kinda sweet.

Yes, you can hit report and one of the options is 'arranged meet, didn't show'. I have no idea what the result of hitting it is, but it made me feel better.

As for your suggestion, what happens if the car blows up/budgies aunt dies/thermonuclear war breaks out? Might need some tweaking.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Anyway, you can report someone as a no show, which strikes me as adequate.

I did not know this, which kind of makes the idea moot I guess anyway!

You've obviously never been stood up, which is kinda sweet.

Yes, you can hit report and one of the options is 'arranged meet, didn't show'. I have no idea what the result of hitting it is, but it made me feel better.

As for your suggestion, what happens if the car blows up/budgies aunt dies/thermonuclear war breaks out? Might need some tweaking.

how about a code on your email to agree which the other party is giving then when they go home and log on line they punch in the code and your added as meet happended

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you know what I think and this is just me , all these ideas about what we should do and shouldn't do would to me be a right pain in the fooking arse.

Why can't people just admit that there are going to be timewasters but it is up to us to to our homework before hand. If we do get had by a time waster ffs put it down to experience move the fook on and stop blooming moaning about them. No one has I don't think ever died from coming across a time waster.

Sorry rant over , as you were

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By *issBehavingxxWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Do you know what I think and this is just me , all these ideas about what we should do and shouldn't do would to me be a right pain in the fooking arse.

Sorry rant over , as you were "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do you know what I think and this is just me , all these ideas about what we should do and shouldn't do would to me be a right pain in the fooking arse.

Sorry rant over , as you were "

Christ go girl

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always keep the confirmation message of agreed meet, then if it's a no show I report straight from the message so admin can see the proof for themselves

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"I think the problem is people can press 'agree meet' when one hasn't been agreed by both parties.

I meant that, after verbally agreeing it only takes one person to initiate it and then the other has to accept..

But what if you agree to a meet and then they do or say something you don't like so you tell them you won't be meeting them after all?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do you know what I think and this is just me , all these ideas about what we should do and shouldn't do would to me be a right pain in the fooking arse.

Sorry rant over , as you were "

Sorry but we have to disagree with you. This forum (site feedback) is for people to suggest ways in which to try and improve the experience for everyone.

From the text by the original OP, he wasn't moaning at all, just trying to come up with suggestions to help everyone along.

What is more annoying is people complaining when people are shot down for suggestions, as usually happens in the forums now.

If there was no point in trying to come up with an idea to cut down on timewasters, equally there is no point in the verification system either, as both are equally open to abuse.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always keep the confirmation message of agreed meet, then if it's a no show I report straight from the message so admin can see the proof for themselves

And THAT is a great idea, don't know why we didn't think of it before!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always keep the confirmation message of agreed meet, then if it's a no show I report straight from the message so admin can see the proof for themselves

That's all well and good but what I want to know is how the fook do admin know that you are telling the truth ? Perhaps they told you they would have to cancel or even postpone then you get hump and report as a time waster.

I am not saying this is what happened at all just using it as an example.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always keep the confirmation message of agreed meet, then if it's a no show I report straight from the message so admin can see the proof for themselves

I am not saying this is what happened at all just using it as an example. "

Very true, but then what is the point of reporting anything to admin?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always keep the confirmation message of agreed meet, then if it's a no show I report straight from the message so admin can see the proof for themselves

I am not saying this is what happened at all just using it as an example.

Very true, but then what is the point of reporting anything to admin?"

Exactly ! Put it down to experience move on and allow admin to do other things to improve the site without having to babysit those who can't run their own lives.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always keep the confirmation message of agreed meet, then if it's a no show I report straight from the message so admin can see the proof for themselves

That's all well and good but what I want to know is how the fook do admin know that you are telling the truth ? Perhaps they told you they would have to cancel or even postpone then you get hump

and report as a time waster.

I am not saying this is what happened at all just using it as an example.

"
if they messaged to cancel or postpone, there's nothing to report

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always keep the confirmation message of agreed meet, then if it's a no show I report straight from the message so admin can see the proof for themselves

That's all well and good but what I want to know is how the fook do admin know that you are telling the truth ? Perhaps they told you they would have to cancel or even postpone then you get hump

and report as a time waster.

I am not saying this is what happened at all just using it as an example.

if they messaged to cancel or postpone, there's nothing to report

How do admin know they have done that if messages have been deleted ? Like I said someone could get hump and report from the confirmation message after deleting any others.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always keep the confirmation message of agreed meet, then if it's a no show I report straight from the message so admin can see the proof for themselves

I am not saying this is what happened at all just using it as an example.

Very true, but then what is the point of reporting anything to admin?

Exactly ! Put it down to experience move on and allow admin to do other things to improve the site without having to babysit those who can't run their own lives. "

As we previously stated, this forum is for suggestions to try and improve the site. It was said earlier that this subject has been brought up before so it is a legitimate concern for some users and although it may not affect you directly, others have the right to post their opinions. To suggest that admin have better things to do than babysit users who have concerns is not helpful to anyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always keep the confirmation message of agreed meet, then if it's a no show I report straight from the message so admin can see the proof for themselves

I am not saying this is what happened at all just using it as an example.

Very true, but then what is the point of reporting anything to admin?

Exactly ! Put it down to experience move on and allow admin to do other things to improve the site without having to babysit those who can't run their own lives.

I give in , I really do. If admin do implement anything along these lines to help those that can't help themselves then I hope it is an opt in feature because I for one would not use it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I give in , I really do. If admin do implement anything along these lines to help those that can't help themselves then I hope it is an opt in feature because I for one would not use it. "

I have no idea why you are getting so worked up over a suggestion in a suggestion part of the forum.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I give in , I really do. If admin do implement anything along these lines to help those that can't help themselves then I hope it is an opt in feature because I for one would not use it.

I have no idea why you are getting so worked up over a suggestion in a suggestion part of the forum."

We agree. Every other part of FAB is opt in, such as verifications, showing pictures, even the "Who's looked at me" part.

Perhaps another way of looking at it is not so much to identify the people who some class as timewasters, more to identify those who aren't.

If such a feature existed, and we had to choose between 2 similar people, we would be more likely to choose someone who has a proven record of showing up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think as soon as you agree to meet someone from admin should turn up,wrap you in cotton wool so you don't have any mishaps or unfortunate disasters and then they deliver you in one happy perfect piece to the meet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think as soon as you agree to meet someone from admin should turn up,wrap you in cotton wool so you don't have any mishaps or unfortunate disasters and then they deliver you in one happy perfect piece to the meet

What an absolutely fan dabby dozey idea , why didn't I think of that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Or alternatively when users post suggestions, mods can remove any sarcastic comments that try to patronise other users?

Just a thought.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What an absolutely fan dabby dozey idea , why didn't I think of that

"
im confused as to why your so highly strung about this, your profile clearly states you don't meet anyway!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What an absolutely fan dabby dozey idea , why didn't I think of that

im confused as to why your so highly strung about this, your profile clearly states you don't meet anyway! "

So because I'm not meeting I'm not allowed an opinion ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What an absolutely fan dabby dozey idea , why didn't I think of that

im confused as to why your so highly strung about this, your profile clearly states you don't meet anyway!

So because I'm not meeting I'm not allowed an opinion ? "

So when you state your beliefs its your opinion but when the OP posted his query he was moaning?

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Ok maybe let's get back to the OP.

Thanks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok maybe let's get back to the OP.

Thanks

Thanks!

We posted something along the same lines a few weeks ago and it was shot down as well.

Our idea was a "meet agreed" button. If both parties clicked it then they committed to the meet. Nothing shows on the profile apart from how many meets were agreed and how many were actually attended.

We realise there will be genuine reasons why meets have to be cancelled, and our idea was more of a guideline really.

We would be much happier to agree to meet someone who had, say, agreed 6 meets and attended 4 rather than someone who had agreed 10 and not shown for one.

We think this would actually help single guys out because we are as guilty as anyone else now of just breezing through the profiles and finding it difficult to identify a potential meet.

We know it is not failsafe by any means but we think it would help to build a bigger picture along with photo-verify, verifications, and suchlike.

Anyway, it seems to be a bit like marmite. Love it or hate it. As we said earlier, even if it was a system you could opt out from, that would also help to decide if you wanted to meet or not.

That is our opinion, and we are sticking to it lol!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I offered my suggestion as to what I do, admin gave us the tools to report a "no show" so admin obviously thought it was needed and presumably trust people not to abuse it.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Was it shot down or people just thought it wasn't a good idea?

I have asked a question of what would happen if we changed our mind before the meet went ahead ( we have done this before now ) on this thread and your thread but I didn't get an answer on either I don't think.

Things like this will never be foolproof so we go with if we get let down we would put it down to experience and move onto the next one.

We don't need mollycoddling as to how we use the site and things like this can be abused anyway

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Ah yes you did answer on the other one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Was it shot down or people just thought it wasn't a good idea?

Things like this will never be foolproof so we go with if we get let down we would put it down to experience and move onto the next one.

We don't need mollycoddling as to how we use the site and things like this can be abused anyway

Well this existing thread shows the type of comments the suggestion created which were similar to comments on our own thread.

We know and accept that everyone has a valid opinion on the site, and we realise that opinion will always be divided.

It is really unhelpful though when suggestions are posted and the comments quickly become of a patronising and personal nature rather than just stating your own opinion.

We are pretty sure some of the existing features on the site are as of a result of previous suggestions, but if users continue to feel like their opinion is less valid than any other it will make people think twice before posting.

With regards to if a meet was agreed then withdrawn, then surely it wouldn't be too much of a stretch to add that as a feature too. It would also ensure thet the other person was aware and could be used if there was a dispute over No Shows. It takes a second to Fab and Unfab a pic, so we are sure it could be possible.

Anyway, we have made our opinion known, so there is no point in prolonging this discussion.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

The OP is in the right place for suggestions

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok maybe let's get back to the OP.

Thanks

Thanks!

We posted something along the same lines a few weeks ago and it was shot down as well.

We realise there will be genuine reasons why meets have to be cancelled, and our idea was more of a guideline really.

We would be much happier to agree to meet someone who had, say, agreed 6 meets and attended 4 rather than someone who had agreed 10 and not shown for one.

We think this would actually help single guys out because we are as guilty as anyone else now of just breezing through the profiles and finding it difficult to identify a potential meet.

We know it is not failsafe by any means but we think it would help to build a bigger picture along with photo-verify, verifications, and suchlike.

Anyway, it seems to be a bit like marmite. Love it or hate it. As we said earlier, even if it was a system you could opt out from, that would also help to decide if you wanted to meet or not.

That is our opinion, and we are sticking to it lol!"

The problem with saying you could opt in and out is that by opting out ultimatly you are likely to be accused of having something to hide.

I think saying that suggestions on this topic get shot down is a fair observation but the reason is because it has been done to death and even the site owners publically state that any such system is open to abuse.

Personally I agree with MoodyMoo that people need to accept that timewasters are, to a degree at least an inevitability on a site like this and make sure that they find a meet process that works for them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok maybe let's get back to the OP.

Thanks

Thanks!

We posted something along the same lines a few weeks ago and it was shot down as well.

We realise there will be genuine reasons why meets have to be cancelled, and our idea was more of a guideline really.

We would be much happier to agree to meet someone who had, say, agreed 6 meets and attended 4 rather than someone who had agreed 10 and not shown for one.

We think this would actually help single guys out because we are as guilty as anyone else now of just breezing through the profiles and finding it difficult to identify a potential meet.

We know it is not failsafe by any means but we think it would help to build a bigger picture along with photo-verify, verifications, and suchlike.

Anyway, it seems to be a bit like marmite. Love it or hate it. As we said earlier, even if it was a system you could opt out from, that would also help to decide if you wanted to meet or not.

That is our opinion, and we are sticking to it lol!

The problem with saying you could opt in and out is that by opting out ultimatly you are likely to be accused of having something to hide.

Thank you. We do understand that timewasters are an "occupational hazard" but when the user you mentioned tells people to stop moaning and also refers to users needing to be babysat, it is hardly helpful to any debate, regardless on whether the subject has been posted for the 1st or the hundredth time.

We are all supposed to be adults and should be able to have a healthy debate, each voicing their own opinions and treating each other with respect.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

While no system is infallible, similar systems are used on other sites for similar problems (eBay for an example) and do a good job of regulating things. It is just an extension of the feedback system really.

Of course any opinions are/were welcome on it should they be constructive.

I could have probably guessed it would have been suggested 100 times before had I thought about it, I just thought it would be worth bringing up having read two threads at the weekend where both ladies were stood up; one in a bar and one in a field.

I'd like to express that I wasn't and am not 'pushing' for such a change, am not complaining about the functionality of the site at present, nor being a victim of a timewaster. I just thought it may be a good feature, seeing as this is a mostly free site and will attract a certain amount of timewasters and something like this may help as a deterrent.

Obviously, using common sense and vetting people is a good and arguable the best way but once again, no system is infallible.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We never knew you could report a no show meet either, ?? Guess if lots of people report the same person admin post anote too them? x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We never knew you could report a no show meet either, ??"

Well at least something useful has come of this thread.

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