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Verifying interests

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By *ympho6969 OP   Woman
5 days ago

glasgow

I can't be the only one here tired of finding out during conversations that people blatantly lie about their interests on their profiles.

I really wish there was a way to verify if people are genuine with safe sex.

To me, it doesn't matter if they're only safe with me. Cos accidents happen and I want that risk to be as low as possible. Testing and condoms only do so much

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
5 days ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

How would you do that?

Surely the only way to verify someone will wear a condom with you is to watch them put it on when you're about to have sex with them? 🤔🤷‍♂️

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By *ympho6969 OP   Woman
5 days ago

glasgow


"How would you do that?

Surely the only way to verify someone will wear a condom with you is to watch them put it on when you're about to have sex with them? 🤔🤷‍♂️"

Or they straight up tell me they don't wear them before a meet?

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By *urvyBunnyWoman
4 days ago

Suffolk

I feel like it's so common now, I don't remember it being this bad. It's frustrating and telling these people that I only play safe has caused them to become quite verbally aggressive, so it just shows me who they really are

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By *assionate_touchMan
4 days ago

edinburgh

Hey, I totally get where you're coming from—it’s frustrating when people aren’t upfront about things that really matter, especially when it comes to safety and honesty. You’re absolutely right, accidents can happen, and being cautious is just smart. It’s refreshing to see someone who’s so clear and responsible about their boundaries. If more people thought like you, the world would be a much better place. Respect for keeping it real and looking out for yourself—and others. 😊

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By *WBiOnlyCoupleCouple
4 days ago

St Helens

Even as a couple who are happy playing BB, we hate men who lie about it to others. We've had men message us just openly telling us "ignore the bit about safe sex, it's just that some people only want people who only play safe, I love BB!". It's disgusting. It's guaranteed to get an angry reply from me (Mrs) and a block. I will never get over how they don't see what they're doing as a violation of boundaries and consent gained by coercion.

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By *teveanddebsCouple
3 days ago

Norwich

Just because someone list an interest doesn't mean they have to do it on every meet.

It just that, a list of things they are interested in.

Not a to-do list.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
2 days ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Fisting really would benefit from having receiving and giving as options. I'd love to know how often people have turned up with lube, boxing glove and high expectations, only to meet the other party who are similarly equipped

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By *litterbabeWoman
2 days ago

hiding from cock pics.


"Fisting really would benefit from having receiving and giving as options. I'd love to know how often people have turned up with lube, boxing glove and high expectations, only to meet the other party who are similarly equipped "

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
2 days ago

Central

Any 'verification' would only be good for the specific moment in time that it would supposedly be given. It would be unfair and inaccurate to award something based on a static point, surely? Just as STI tests have a lag, before results are meaningful, from the time of having sex. And even then, nothing is 100% accurate.

Like most things, there are probably many ways to achieve your goals. Fab could list bareback and safer sex options, so users could select what's relevant to them. It wouldn't stop lies.

But if this post is solely about safer sex, then you can only really take responsibility in the moment, for each and every activity. It's on each of us to police our own sexual activity.

There's no tracking facility that gives 24/7 monitoring. It's all on us. People get others to monitor in group meetings, such as a partner or friends. We have to assume there's a risk each time with everything and determine our approach. There are things we can do to mitigate the level of risk but I don't see this suggestion being it.

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