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Could CD TV & TS be in separate categories

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By *ndyBishop OP   Man
9 weeks ago

Sevenoaks

Hello.

I’m not certain of the correct wording, so if I offend, please educate me.

Is it possible for cross dressing people, and transexual people to be searchable in different categories. So, I am interested in meeting feminine, women, with a penis. I’m not interested in meeting men who cross dress.

Again if I’ve used the wrong terminology please let me know.

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By *amantha_NiteTV/TS
9 weeks ago

The Lake District

This one,again ??


"

Is it possible for cross dressing people, and transexual people to be searchable in different categories. So, I am interested in meeting feminine, women, with a penis. I’m not interested in meeting men who cross dress.

"

And who would police every profie and decided which class every individual and their profile should be in ?

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By (user no longer on site)
9 weeks ago

People keep asking for this and for some reason the Admin won’t do it

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By *uliette500Woman
8 weeks ago

Hull


"This one,again ??

Is it possible for cross dressing people, and transexual people to be searchable in different categories. So, I am interested in meeting feminine, women, with a penis. I’m not interested in meeting men who cross dress.

And who would police every profie and decided which class every individual and their profile should be in ?"

Why would it need policing? Most people in this merged category would prefer them to be separated. A cross dresser, transvestite and a trans man or woman are not the same and I don't see why they should all be in one category.

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By *eresa_cdslutTV/TS
8 weeks ago

Bodmin

I just read the profile. From the information provided I decide whom I want to meet. I do not want anyone else or an AI robot filtering out people I might like. Unfortunately, despite all the good advice contained in the forum, an awful lot of profiles fail to give much information and shows lack of images and interest.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
8 weeks ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

This keeps getting raised and rejected.

Presumably because it would be impossible for admin to police who belongs in which category. Unlike the existing categories.

This would be a definite problem, as on other sites, like Chix, I know people personally who are not Ts, but who have chosen that category, anyway.

This is a swinging site and people have a right to expect people to be in their correct category. This is why admin are so hot on taking action against single males pretending to be couples, etc

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By (user no longer on site)
8 weeks ago


"

Chix has all sorts on and frankly I'm not keen on your 'I I do not want to be associated with CDs' it sounds rather unpleasant. "

Sorry but a man dressing in women’s lingerie as a fetish is not the same as a trans person in any respect, and so many CDs perform a deeply misogynistic idea of women as submissive and slutty.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
8 weeks ago

Titz Towers, North Notts


"

Sorry but a man dressing in women’s lingerie as a fetish is not the same as a trans person in any respect, and so many CDs perform a deeply misogynistic idea of women as submissive and slutty."

That just comes across as very blinkered and resentful of others.

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By *issalignedTV/TS
8 weeks ago

London

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By (user no longer on site)
8 weeks ago


"

That just comes across as very blinkered and resentful of others. "

I have every right to be resentful of misogyny

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By *issalignedTV/TS
8 weeks ago

London

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
8 weeks ago

Titz Towers, North Notts


"

That just comes across as very blinkered and resentful of others.

I have every right to be resentful of misogyny"

Ever thought that you could be demonstrating misogyny to others?

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By (user no longer on site)
8 weeks ago


"

Ever thought that you could be demonstrating misogyny to others?"

How so? CDs are men

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By *emma StonesTV/TS
8 weeks ago

Crewe

Well this has gone well.

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By *issalignedTV/TS
8 weeks ago

London

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
8 weeks ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Bigotry is never nice to encounter.

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By (user no longer on site)
8 weeks ago


"Bigotry is never nice to encounter."

How is it bigotry? If there are CDs who are trans or non-binary but are unable to come out of the closet due to societal stigma, and find crossdressing an outlet for their gender identity, then I sympathise with them.

But there are CDs who identify as men and entirely hold onto their male privilege in society, and dress because they consider feminine clothing as sexualised. That group are not oppressed in any respect, moreover they perpetuate the patriarchal notion that to be feminine is to be a sex object.

I appreciate there’s nuance here and I’m certainly not suggesting that all CDs are bad people. And if I’m mistaken then explain why, I’m happy to admit when I’m wrong. But I guess it’s easier to just accuse me of bigotry or roll your eyes rather than have a discussion.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
8 weeks ago

Titz Towers, North Notts


"Bigotry is never nice to encounter.

How is it bigotry? If there are CDs who are trans or non-binary but are unable to come out of the closet due to societal stigma, and find crossdressing an outlet for their gender identity, then I sympathise with them.

But there are CDs who identify as men and entirely hold onto their male privilege in society, and dress because they consider feminine clothing as sexualised. That group are not oppressed in any respect, moreover they perpetuate the patriarchal notion that to be feminine is to be a sex object.

I appreciate there’s nuance here and I’m certainly not suggesting that all CDs are bad people. And if I’m mistaken then explain why, I’m happy to admit when I’m wrong. But I guess it’s easier to just accuse me of bigotry or roll your eyes rather than have a discussion."

CDs are not men.

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By (user no longer on site)
8 weeks ago


"CDs are not men. "

You’re going to have to explain what you mean? I understand that some CDs identify as trans or non-binary but surely the whole point of crossdressing is that you take it off and go back to being men? Otherwise how is it cross dressing?

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By *eavenscentitCouple
8 weeks ago

barnstaple


"Bigotry is never nice to encounter.

How is it bigotry? If there are CDs who are trans or non-binary but are unable to come out of the closet due to societal stigma, and find crossdressing an outlet for their gender identity, then I sympathise with them.

But there are CDs who identify as men and entirely hold onto their male privilege in society, and dress because they consider feminine clothing as sexualised. That group are not oppressed in any respect, moreover they perpetuate the patriarchal notion that to be feminine is to be a sex object.

I appreciate there’s nuance here and I’m certainly not suggesting that all CDs are bad people. And if I’m mistaken then explain why, I’m happy to admit when I’m wrong. But I guess it’s easier to just accuse me of bigotry or roll your eyes rather than have a discussion.

CDs are not men. "

How so? What would you say they are

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
8 weeks ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Whilst they a CD is presenting as female, they are female and deserve to be treated as such.

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By *ndyBishop OP   Man
8 weeks ago

Sevenoaks

I apologise for causing any offence, or people to be upset.

When I wrote this request, I really did think it would be helpful.

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By (user no longer on site)
8 weeks ago


"Whilst they a CD is presenting as female, they are female and deserve to be treated as such."

Therefore do away with the TV/TS category entirely and just have Female and Male options?

~Transgender people are people whose internal knowledge of their gender is different from the gender people thought they were when they were born. “Trans” is a shorter word meaning transgender.

A transgender woman lives as a woman today but was thought to be male when she was born. A transgender man lives as a man today but was thought to be female when he was born.

Some transgender people identify as neither male nor female, or they may identify as both. There are a variety of terms that people who aren't entirely male or entirely female use to describe their gender identity, like non-binary, non-conforming, queer, and genderqueer.~ from a popular app’s gender identity FAQ

My suggestion would be to have have a feature/option where people can further define what their identity is

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By *BaileyxTV/TS
8 weeks ago

St Neots

And this is the problem with making everything fucking binary

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
8 weeks ago

Titz Towers, North Notts


"And this is the problem with making everything fucking binary

"

Too right.

I'm just waiting for someone to demand HPW or 'shemale like in the pornos' categories

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By *eavenscentitCouple
8 weeks ago

barnstaple


"Whilst they a CD is presenting as female, they are female and deserve to be treated as such."

I disagree, they are not female. Ms

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By *inkOasisWoman
8 weeks ago

Wolves


"Whilst they a CD is presenting as female, they are female and deserve to be treated as such.

I disagree, they are not female. Ms"

I agree. A crossdresser is not female ( unless they are a female cross dressing as a male)

CD/TV should be one category.

Transgender is a separate category .

As I’m legally female , I’m rightly in my correct category.

I don’t go around looking like dame Edna

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
8 weeks ago

Titz Towers, North Notts


"

I don’t go around looking like dame Edna "

Nice of you to punch down on others.

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By (user no longer on site)
8 weeks ago


"Whilst they a CD is presenting as female, they are female and deserve to be treated as such."

So do you consider yourself genderfluid or do you consider yourself female all the time?

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By (user no longer on site)
8 weeks ago


"

I don’t go around looking like dame Edna

Nice of you to punch down on others. "

It’s really strange you see it as punching down, like trans women have any societal privilege.

Surely that’s the reason TV/CDs don’t present as female in their every day life? They know the societal repercussions for doing so, the societal repercussions that trans women experience every day.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
8 weeks ago

Central

No. It's inappropriate to force people to have to disclose to others what may be distressing and invasive medical interventions, including when they don't have the desired outcome.

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By *BaileyxTV/TS
8 weeks ago

St Neots

The attempt to force everyone in a neat box on this thread is cringey and will never be resolved.

If you find someone attractive or unattractive, will a label on here change that?

The swinging lifestyle used to be closely linked to open mindedness and exploring honest fantasies in an open environment. Let's not lose that.

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By (user no longer on site)
8 weeks ago


"The attempt to force everyone in a neat box on this thread is cringey and will never be resolved.

If you find someone attractive or unattractive, will a label on here change that?

The swinging lifestyle used to be closely linked to open mindedness and exploring honest fantasies in an open environment. Let's not lose that."

Thing is the box that’s currently there isn’t fit for purpose, as clearly demonstrated. I don’t see how giving people more options to correctly describe themselves would be a bad thing. Apart from anything people assume that TV/TS means AMAB and femme presenting, so where are trans men and non-binary people supposed to go?

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By *BaileyxTV/TS
8 weeks ago

St Neots


"The attempt to force everyone in a neat box on this thread is cringey and will never be resolved.

If you find someone attractive or unattractive, will a label on here change that?

The swinging lifestyle used to be closely linked to open mindedness and exploring honest fantasies in an open environment. Let's not lose that.

Thing is the box that’s currently there isn’t fit for purpose, as clearly demonstrated. I don’t see how giving people more options to correctly describe themselves would be a bad thing. Apart from anything people assume that TV/TS means AMAB and femme presenting, so where are trans men and non-binary people supposed to go?"

It's the attempts from people to force their judgements onto others I'm referring to.

It's incredibly complex and should have more options but also incredibly difficult to get right as we don't all fit in neat boxes.

I've given up trying to find my box and just say gender fluid.

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By *ileen_cdTV/TS
7 weeks ago

Dublin

This is why ^^^

People start arguing about terms and insulting each other, instead of either supporting this simple idea or putting reasons why the idea is not good.

Personally, I think the separation would be good. Nobody needs to police it, FabSwingers is not a registry office, *you* declare who are and you deal with the good and bad consequences.

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By *4thfloorTV/TS
7 weeks ago

Dublin


"

This is a swinging site and people have a right to expect people to be in their correct category.

"

Precisely why there needs to actually *be* accurate categories for people.

I know fab is an oldschool site (and that's a big part of what I love about it) but I'm amazed that in this day and age anyone is still seriously trying to defend conflating crossdressing with being trans.

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By *aydeTV/TS
7 weeks ago

Motherwell

Totally agree

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By *artfordBlokeMan
7 weeks ago

Dartford


"

Surely that’s the reason TV/CDs don’t present as female in their every day life? They know the societal repercussions for doing so, the societal repercussions that trans women experience every day."

Here's a radical concept for you,some people who cross dress do it for the sexual thrill it gives them, not because they feel they are in the wrong body, or wish to be like myself, I'm not feminine in any way, except perhaps my long hair, I have no interest in changing my gender or dressing outside of a sexual encounter.

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By *4thfloorTV/TS
7 weeks ago

Dublin


"

Surely that’s the reason TV/CDs don’t present as female in their every day life? They know the societal repercussions for doing so, the societal repercussions that trans women experience every day.

Here's a radical concept for you,some people who cross dress do it for the sexual thrill it gives them, not because they feel they are in the wrong body, or wish to be like myself, I'm not feminine in any way, except perhaps my long hair, I have no interest in changing my gender or dressing outside of a sexual encounter. "

You do you, live and let live, and this is precisely we need the separate categories!

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By *ackbydemandMan
7 weeks ago

Leicester


"This is why ^^^

People start arguing about terms and insulting each other, instead of either supporting this simple idea or putting reasons why the idea is not good.

Personally, I think the separation would be good. Nobody needs to police it, FabSwingers is not a registry office, *you* declare who are and you deal with the good and bad consequences. "

This is spot on, it's almost like people aren't interested in finding what someone likes, they just want to start an argument.

There's so many infinite variations people just need to meet up, see if they vibe and if they do then go for it.

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By (user no longer on site)
7 weeks ago


"

Here's a radical concept for you,some people who cross dress do it for the sexual thrill it gives them, not because they feel they are in the wrong body, or wish to be like myself, I'm not feminine in any way, except perhaps my long hair, I have no interest in changing my gender or dressing outside of a sexual encounter. "

Lol I literally said this and was told off by some other CDs in the thread, who said they wanted to be treated as female and didn’t consider themselves men. You all need to make your mind up (or I suspect the CDs who do actually want to be female need to stop calling themselves CDs and transition)

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By *ndyBishop OP   Man
7 weeks ago

Sevenoaks

I’m really sorry for starting a thread that seems to have caused offence/frustration/anger, that was not my intent. I’m sorry if anyone’s been upset by this. It was a well meant query about how the site could be improved.

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By *4thfloorTV/TS
7 weeks ago

Dublin


"I’m really sorry for starting a thread that seems to have caused offence/frustration/anger, that was not my intent. I’m sorry if anyone’s been upset by this. It was a well meant query about how the site could be improved. "

Very clear that you meant well, and it's an improvement that the majority of us seem to want. It’s just a sore point for us trans people and very frustrating when other people start speaking over us and acting like we're being unreasonable.

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By *exi-tvTV/TS
7 weeks ago

Chichester

Discussions like this give you a clear idea of who to block.

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