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Deposit for a meet

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By *he James gang OP   Couple
over a year ago

NEWTOWNABBEY

Due to increasing number of fantasists who no show without a cancellation message, what can be done? What about a deposit paid to a holding facility (fab), only returned if cancelled up to a certain amount of hours before scheduled meet. Or at least a method of checking a register of persistent no shows. It can't be a one off that they don't show. I had to turn down a few takers for our party because we had enough confirmed attendees until the meet arrived, no show, no message, no excuse. I'm not saying they need a sick note but at least a message saying they can't make it. If we had a club here, fab would be redundant. Anyone any other ideas.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Once sex becomes a transaction, people might as well go to a different kind of service. If you want a guarantee I suggest you connect with people in the real world and don't put all your faith into strangers.

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By *wo for luckCouple
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Just meet verified only.

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By *olden PoleMan
over a year ago

Kent

Nothing can really be done to prevent the no shows….if it’s going to happen it’s going to happen sadly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Just meet verified only. "

It's stíll no guarantee the person will show up

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By *onyjoCouple
over a year ago

Peterborough

I agree somthing needs to be done, but not sure what.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Due to increasing number of fantasists who no show without a cancellation message, what can be done? What about a deposit paid to a holding facility (fab), only returned if cancelled up to a certain amount of hours before scheduled meet. Or at least a method of checking a register of persistent no shows. It can't be a one off that they don't show. I had to turn down a few takers for our party because we had enough confirmed attendees until the meet arrived, no show, no message, no excuse. I'm not saying they need a sick note but at least a message saying they can't make it. If we had a club here, fab would be redundant. Anyone any other ideas."

That's the most ridiculous idea I have ever read on the forum in my 9 years on Fab.

People are allowed to change their minds and not want to have sex with other people if they want to...

You are lowering fun sex into a pimp type arrangement with that suggestion.

How about you stop expecting people to drop their knickers or pants and provide you with sex

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *andi_kinkygramTV/TS
over a year ago

Edinburgh

I suppose the best thing is to have low expectations, then if an enjoyable meeting happens it's a bonus. Sometimes I feel a live video chat helps filter out timewasters before meeting but nothing is guaranteed.

tc

Cx

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By *he James gang OP   Couple
over a year ago

NEWTOWNABBEY


"Due to increasing number of fantasists who no show without a cancellation message, what can be done? What about a deposit paid to a holding facility (fab), only returned if cancelled up to a certain amount of hours before scheduled meet. Or at least a method of checking a register of persistent no shows. It can't be a one off that they don't show. I had to turn down a few takers for our party because we had enough confirmed attendees until the meet arrived, no show, no message, no excuse. I'm not saying they need a sick note but at least a message saying they can't make it. If we had a club here, fab would be redundant. Anyone any other ideas.

That's the most ridiculous idea I have ever read on the forum in my 9 years on Fab.

People are allowed to change their minds and not want to have sex with other people if they want to...

You are lowering fun sex into a pimp type arrangement with that suggestion.

How about you stop expecting people to drop their knickers or pants and provide you with sex

"

So, you've never seen gangbangs arranged in a hotel where participants are charged to cover costs! I said a returnable deposit if they have the manners to let you know they won't be attending. A simple I/we won't be attending is sufficient. These are from meet verified, phone numbers exchanged and confirmation of attendance the day before. This is all on the back of multiple messages. Aha, the old don't invite strangers nugget of advice from some. So everyone you meet you know? As I said, we've no clubs here, so everyone is a stranger, if it's your first time meeting. Any better ideas?

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By *he James gang OP   Couple
over a year ago

NEWTOWNABBEY


"Once sex becomes a transaction, people might as well go to a different kind of service. If you want a guarantee I suggest you connect with people in the real world and don't put all your faith into strangers. "

And this real world you talk about, is where? People meet strangers every day on fab, it's why they have a 'meets' section! So, in this real world, how does it work?

Clubs only, not practical for us.

Meet verified ??

Have talked on phone ??

Conformation of attending the day before, when they are asking for address details ??

If one of your friends asked you to a vanilla party, I'd bet you'd let them know if you couldn't make it. No one has en expectation of sex at a meet, that is a given on fab. It's common curtesy, manners, decency to inform non attendance but obviously you think that's fine. Says a lot.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Due to increasing number of fantasists who no show without a cancellation message, what can be done? What about a deposit paid to a holding facility (fab), only returned if cancelled up to a certain amount of hours before scheduled meet. Or at least a method of checking a register of persistent no shows. It can't be a one off that they don't show. I had to turn down a few takers for our party because we had enough confirmed attendees until the meet arrived, no show, no message, no excuse. I'm not saying they need a sick note but at least a message saying they can't make it. If we had a club here, fab would be redundant. Anyone any other ideas.

That's the most ridiculous idea I have ever read on the forum in my 9 years on Fab.

People are allowed to change their minds and not want to have sex with other people if they want to...

You are lowering fun sex into a pimp type arrangement with that suggestion.

How about you stop expecting people to drop their knickers or pants and provide you with sex

So, you've never seen gangbangs arranged in a hotel where participants are charged to cover costs! I said a returnable deposit if they have the manners to let you know they won't be attending. A simple I/we won't be attending is sufficient. These are from meet verified, phone numbers exchanged and confirmation of attendance the day before. This is all on the back of multiple messages. Aha, the old don't invite strangers nugget of advice from some. So everyone you meet you know? As I said, we've no clubs here, so everyone is a stranger, if it's your first time meeting. Any better ideas?"

It seems like you've covered all bases, exchanged numbers and had plenty of communication, meet verified isn't all it's cracked up to be.

It's just people, if only they'd let you know a few hours in advance, or even just let you know last minute if they got cold feet it's better than nothing.

I feel you pain

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *entle_lover_xMan
over a year ago

Great Dunmow


"Due to increasing number of fantasists who no show without a cancellation message, what can be done? What about a deposit paid to a holding facility (fab), only returned if cancelled up to a certain amount of hours before scheduled meet. Or at least a method of checking a register of persistent no shows. It can't be a one off that they don't show. I had to turn down a few takers for our party because we had enough confirmed attendees until the meet arrived, no show, no message, no excuse. I'm not saying they need a sick note but at least a message saying they can't make it. If we had a club here, fab would be redundant. Anyone any other ideas.

That's the most ridiculous idea I have ever read on the forum in my 9 years on Fab.

People are allowed to change their minds and not want to have sex with other people if they want to...

You are lowering fun sex into a pimp type arrangement with that suggestion.

How about you stop expecting people to drop their knickers or pants and provide you with sex

"

This is both a bad idea and a good idea in some form. Very unlikely Fab would get involved and feels very strange for one on one meets. Sadly no shows will happen and people will change minds. Just got to do your best to minimise the chances using veris etc.

However, if you dimisss it out of hand probably never arranged a party or event especially one with a numbers limit. Last minute no shows really can screw things up and very common for people to pay to attend to help cover costs. Fab won't get involved but no reason why you can't do this yourself if arranging something. We've arranged and charged before - funny how attitudes change when it comes time to send the money. Some immediate and some faff around and becomes clear not serious. We don't want to arrange events with a fee now as too much pressure and expectation but might ask for a deposit via Paypal to confirm attendance and promise to give it back if they attend. This would be no guarantee of course but would eliminate the complete dreamers and if people really have a genuine reason and communicate early enough then can give them back the money even if they can't make it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Due to increasing number of fantasists who no show without a cancellation message, what can be done? What about a deposit paid to a holding facility (fab), only returned if cancelled up to a certain amount of hours before scheduled meet. Or at least a method of checking a register of persistent no shows. It can't be a one off that they don't show. I had to turn down a few takers for our party because we had enough confirmed attendees until the meet arrived, no show, no message, no excuse. I'm not saying they need a sick note but at least a message saying they can't make it. If we had a club here, fab would be redundant. Anyone any other ideas."

Is this for real. Hahaha

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By *ust JuicyWoman
over a year ago

east london

Had a couple of no shows and at the time it’s really annoying mainly because of the wasted effort etc

But then I think thank god they didn’t turn up, if they are the type of people who lack such basic common decency, they wouldn’t be someone I would want to meet so lucky me

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Patience always works gives you time to suss out

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Unfortunately, it's just one of the risks that's part of this game.

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

I wouldn't got as far as a sick note but a letter from their parents a must

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By *otandpepperCouple
over a year ago

wolverhampton

I would never pay a deposit into any strangers account…. So many scammers around

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By *ightNWet69Woman
over a year ago

dark side of the moon


"Due to increasing number of fantasists who no show without a cancellation message, what can be done? What about a deposit paid to a holding facility (fab), only returned if cancelled up to a certain amount of hours before scheduled meet. Or at least a method of checking a register of persistent no shows. It can't be a one off that they don't show. I had to turn down a few takers for our party because we had enough confirmed attendees until the meet arrived, no show, no message, no excuse. I'm not saying they need a sick note but at least a message saying they can't make it. If we had a club here, fab would be redundant. Anyone any other ideas.

That's the most ridiculous idea I have ever read on the forum in my 9 years on Fab.

People are allowed to change their minds and not want to have sex with other people if they want to...

You are lowering fun sex into a pimp type arrangement with that suggestion.

How about you stop expecting people to drop their knickers or pants and provide you with sex

"

Agree with this. I would NEVER put or expect anyone else to put down a deposit to secure a meet. There are plenty of other sites/apps if that's the road you want to go down, Fab isn't on that road.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Due to increasing number of fantasists who no show without a cancellation message, what can be done? What about a deposit paid to a holding facility (fab), only returned if cancelled up to a certain amount of hours before scheduled meet. Or at least a method of checking a register of persistent no shows. It can't be a one off that they don't show. I had to turn down a few takers for our party because we had enough confirmed attendees until the meet arrived, no show, no message, no excuse. I'm not saying they need a sick note but at least a message saying they can't make it. If we had a club here, fab would be redundant. Anyone any other ideas.

That's the most ridiculous idea I have ever read on the forum in my 9 years on Fab.

People are allowed to change their minds and not want to have sex with other people if they want to...

You are lowering fun sex into a pimp type arrangement with that suggestion.

How about you stop expecting people to drop their knickers or pants and provide you with sex

Agree with this. I would NEVER put or expect anyone else to put down a deposit to secure a meet. There are plenty of other sites/apps if that's the road you want to go down, Fab isn't on that road. "

Totally agree… not something that comes across well at all

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By *awg-mo-thoinWoman
over a year ago

Belfast

This is the most insane suggestion I’ve ever read on here. What happens if an hour before your meet they get an aura of a migraine coming on (chronic sufferer here!)? Or their childminder texts to say their child is unwell? Or they get called into work on an emergency? Or… craziest of all… they simply get cold feet or change their mind?

People are allowed to cancel or no show for any reason at all and while I appreciate the frustration, I don’t think holding deposits hostage to try and FORCE people to attend a meet they might have otherwise bailed on is the right approach.

And the “common courtesy” line that gets rolled out here again and again… this is not every day life and communication, different rules and social etiquettes apply here. You might not like it but it is what it is.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"This is the most insane suggestion I’ve ever read on here. What happens if an hour before your meet they get an aura of a migraine coming on (chronic sufferer here!)? Or their childminder texts to say their child is unwell? Or they get called into work on an emergency? Or… craziest of all… they simply get cold feet or change their mind?

People are allowed to cancel or no show for any reason at all and while I appreciate the frustration, I don’t think holding deposits hostage to try and FORCE people to attend a meet they might have otherwise bailed on is the right approach.

And the “common courtesy” line that gets rolled out here again and again… this is not every day life and communication, different rules and social etiquettes apply here. You might not like it but it is what it is. "

I injured myself and landed in hospital for nearly two weeks, the day before my first ever meet.

Of course I was widely accused of being a fake. (Anyone I'd been talking to who responded with anything other than hostility, got photographic evidence. So there's that)

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By *eandmrsjones69Couple
over a year ago

Middle England

Whilst I feel your pain, it's so easy to set up a profile on here. A person with a no show profile would just set up a new one. There are probably as many UNLOS than actual profiles on here.

If the site was going to do as per your suggestion they might as well try to enforce profile verification so people can't set up profiles on a whim but that's not going to happen.

It might be worth seeing how viable it would be to get to a club, even for an away day. Failing that unless you can come up with a solution that works for you, it's probably something you'll have to deal with.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think common courtesy and respect for other people's time is important but then shit does happen.

I myself would feel weird paying a deposit for a meet I think. I can understand why where maybe a gangbang or other event was organised which in turn creates cost, for a normal one on one meet that wouldn't be for me.

I don't know really if there is a solution people will drop out for all sorts of reasons.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I think common courtesy and respect for other people's time is important but then shit does happen.

I myself would feel weird paying a deposit for a meet I think. I can understand why where maybe a gangbang or other event was organised which in turn creates cost, for a normal one on one meet that wouldn't be for me.

I don't know really if there is a solution people will drop out for all sorts of reasons.

"

I absolutely split costs with people I know and trust. With people I don't? I just make it lower cost/stakes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think this suggestion will actually have the opposite effect of it's intention and simply kill meets stone dead.

I can certainly understand tge frustration and I've certainly had my share of no-shows in the past, but if the site required a payment that would not be returned if you were unable to attend a meet due to unforseen circumstances and beyond our control, I'm pretty sure nobody would make arrangements to meet anyone.

Or, they'd simply take communication of site - as it seems an increasing number do anyway.

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By *orthyorkypairCouple
over a year ago

North Yorkshire

lets face it "thats life" we been here 16 years and only had 2 no shows! primarily we think because we try to get to know people before we arrange to meet

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

O o O oo

We had a meet planned once with a man who didn't turn up at the pub we were meeting at. We read in the local paper a few weeks later of a young man who had had a Motorcycle accident and was lucky to be alive and realised it was him from the picture, turned out it was the same day we were meant to be meeting him.

If this was in place he not only would have had lots of broken bones but would have lost his fiver too !!

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By *he James gang OP   Couple
over a year ago

NEWTOWNABBEY


"I think this suggestion will actually have the opposite effect of it's intention and simply kill meets stone dead.

I can certainly understand tge frustration and I've certainly had my share of no-shows in the past, but if the site required a payment that would not be returned if you were unable to attend a meet due to unforseen circumstances and beyond our control, I'm pretty sure nobody would make arrangements to meet anyone.

Or, they'd simply take communication of site - as it seems an increasing number do anyway.

"

Everyone is missing my point. Money would be returned if they send a message cancelling. A simple, sorry can't make it is alls that's required. Nobody is going to gain anything except you wouldn't be sitting around, all dolled up for sweet fa.

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By *hropshireGentMan
over a year ago

Shropshire

Now I personally only meet verified users. I think a good way to stop the time wasters on the site would be for members to be invited to join only.

If you know someone then you can send them a e-mail link. It’s would stop the problem but after all fab is a business, the more members it gets that pay for membership the more money it makes. So it will not happen.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think this suggestion will actually have the opposite effect of it's intention and simply kill meets stone dead.

I can certainly understand tge frustration and I've certainly had my share of no-shows in the past, but if the site required a payment that would not be returned if you were unable to attend a meet due to unforseen circumstances and beyond our control, I'm pretty sure nobody would make arrangements to meet anyone.

Or, they'd simply take communication of site - as it seems an increasing number do anyway.

Everyone is missing my point. Money would be returned if they send a message cancelling. A simple, sorry can't make it is alls that's required. Nobody is going to gain anything except you wouldn't be sitting around, all dolled up for sweet fa."

Who’s going to hold the deposit? FAB certainly won’t do it. Suspect you’d need some sort of license to hold third party funds. Total non starter of an idea I’m afraid.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We had a meet planned once with a man who didn't turn up at the pub we were meeting at. We read in the local paper a few weeks later of a young man who had had a Motorcycle accident and was lucky to be alive and realised it was him from the picture, turned out it was the same day we were meant to be meeting him.

If this was in place he not only would have had lots of broken bones but would have lost his fiver too !! "

Poor guy, some would've called him a time waster because he couldn't let you know, and to be fair he was probably not in the right mindset for a while to be thinking of a meet when he nearly died.

Was it in the days of the internet as you mentioned the local paper.

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

Anything I go to,a house party or a social I normally pay for a ticket to help spread the cost of the event and that way the organiser is covered

Even if I had to cancel I wouldn't expect any refund

Once the organiser isn't out of pocket the the problem becomes no shows creating an imbalance at the event which is a completely different problem

I read somewhere previously that single men are the main type of no shows so the best thing to do is allow 50% more than you need

Is the problem single men at your parties

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By *otbeefandonionsCouple
over a year ago

Bathgate

If someone asked me to pay a deposit before a meet, the block button would be used before I even replied.

I understand its frustrating but maybe you need to take a wee step back from things a wee bit if you feel your life is so affected by a no show meet that people should financially suffer.

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By *inkForLifeCouple
over a year ago

North Shields


"Due to increasing number of fantasists who no show without a cancellation message, what can be done? What about a deposit paid to a holding facility (fab), only returned if cancelled up to a certain amount of hours before scheduled meet. Or at least a method of checking a register of persistent no shows. It can't be a one off that they don't show. I had to turn down a few takers for our party because we had enough confirmed attendees until the meet arrived, no show, no message, no excuse. I'm not saying they need a sick note but at least a message saying they can't make it. If we had a club here, fab would be redundant. Anyone any other ideas."

You can report no shows from their profile.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I think this suggestion will actually have the opposite effect of it's intention and simply kill meets stone dead.

I can certainly understand tge frustration and I've certainly had my share of no-shows in the past, but if the site required a payment that would not be returned if you were unable to attend a meet due to unforseen circumstances and beyond our control, I'm pretty sure nobody would make arrangements to meet anyone.

Or, they'd simply take communication of site - as it seems an increasing number do anyway.

Everyone is missing my point. Money would be returned if they send a message cancelling. A simple, sorry can't make it is alls that's required. Nobody is going to gain anything except you wouldn't be sitting around, all dolled up for sweet fa."

I see your point.

I think it's an insanely terrible idea.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

O o O oo


"We had a meet planned once with a man who didn't turn up at the pub we were meeting at. We read in the local paper a few weeks later of a young man who had had a Motorcycle accident and was lucky to be alive and realised it was him from the picture, turned out it was the same day we were meant to be meeting him.

If this was in place he not only would have had lots of broken bones but would have lost his fiver too !!

Poor guy, some would've called him a time waster because he couldn't let you know, and to be fair he was probably not in the right mindset for a while to be thinking of a meet when he nearly died.

Was it in the days of the internet as you mentioned the local paper. "

There are still local papers about now

The state he was in he probably wasn't capable enough to cancel the meet

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By *lleyCat1969Man
over a year ago

Folkestone

Fast forward a few months and this idea has been made Fab policy.

What happens if I turn up, we all have a good time but for some reason the other party decides to say I'm a no-show? I lose my deposit, but who gets it? The person who says I didn't turn up? Fabs keep it?

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By *ethnmelvCouple
over a year ago

Cardiff

Arrange to meet at Clubs, if no show then no issue. If they show and things work out then organise another sesh elsewhere once you know each other better. This works for us, but everyone has their own approach. Happy Fab’ing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Due to increasing number of fantasists who no show without a cancellation message, what can be done? What about a deposit paid to a holding facility (fab), only returned if cancelled up to a certain amount of hours before scheduled meet. Or at least a method of checking a register of persistent no shows. It can't be a one off that they don't show. I had to turn down a few takers for our party because we had enough confirmed attendees until the meet arrived, no show, no message, no excuse. I'm not saying they need a sick note but at least a message saying they can't make it. If we had a club here, fab would be redundant. Anyone any other ideas.

That's the most ridiculous idea I have ever read on the forum in my 9 years on Fab.

People are allowed to change their minds and not want to have sex with other people if they want to...

You are lowering fun sex into a pimp type arrangement with that suggestion.

How about you stop expecting people to drop their knickers or pants and provide you with sex

So, you've never seen gangbangs arranged in a hotel where participants are charged to cover costs! I said a returnable deposit if they have the manners to let you know they won't be attending. A simple I/we won't be attending is sufficient. These are from meet verified, phone numbers exchanged and confirmation of attendance the day before. This is all on the back of multiple messages. Aha, the old don't invite strangers nugget of advice from some. So everyone you meet you know? As I said, we've no clubs here, so everyone is a stranger, if it's your first time meeting. Any better ideas?"

I don't attend gangbangs, that is not my scene.

I have never had a no show in 9 years on Fab, all the men I have arranged to meet have turned up. So no deposits needed here

Your idea of a deposit held by Fab is completely ludicrous.

I am not missing the point at all.

I do have a better idea for you ..open your own club for your gangbangs.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *he James gang OP   Couple
over a year ago

NEWTOWNABBEY


"Due to increasing number of fantasists who no show without a cancellation message, what can be done? What about a deposit paid to a holding facility (fab), only returned if cancelled up to a certain amount of hours before scheduled meet. Or at least a method of checking a register of persistent no shows. It can't be a one off that they don't show. I had to turn down a few takers for our party because we had enough confirmed attendees until the meet arrived, no show, no message, no excuse. I'm not saying they need a sick note but at least a message saying they can't make it. If we had a club here, fab would be redundant. Anyone any other ideas.

That's the most ridiculous idea I have ever read on the forum in my 9 years on Fab.

People are allowed to change their minds and not want to have sex with other people if they want to...

You are lowering fun sex into a pimp type arrangement with that suggestion.

How about you stop expecting people to drop their knickers or pants and provide you with sex

So, you've never seen gangbangs arranged in a hotel where participants are charged to cover costs! I said a returnable deposit if they have the manners to let you know they won't be attending. A simple I/we won't be attending is sufficient. These are from meet verified, phone numbers exchanged and confirmation of attendance the day before. This is all on the back of multiple messages. Aha, the old don't invite strangers nugget of advice from some. So everyone you meet you know? As I said, we've no clubs here, so everyone is a stranger, if it's your first time meeting. Any better ideas?

I don't attend gangbangs, that is not my scene.

I have never had a no show in 9 years on Fab, all the men I have arranged to meet have turned up. So no deposits needed here

Your idea of a deposit held by Fab is completely ludicrous.

I am not missing the point at all.

I do have a better idea for you ..open your own club for your gangbangs.

"

kinda hard to open a club in this part of the world, when the one that did open was set on fire. Not to mention the 'Sunday world' trying to expose the sexual shenanigans by infiltrating anything fledgling in the casual sex world. We go to chams a few times a year and would you believe it ?? success rate. This talk of oh, what do you expect when meeting strangers. Good advice that considering everyone is a stranger when you join.

My idea of a deposit was a throw in the wind line, just to see if there's any better ideas out there and discuss.

Any action taken against no shows, was based on no one having the courtesy to cancel. That's all.

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By *awg-mo-thoinWoman
over a year ago

Belfast


"Everyone is missing my point. Money would be returned if they send a message cancelling. A simple, sorry can't make it is alls that's required. Nobody is going to gain anything except you wouldn't be sitting around, all dolled up for sweet fa."

It’s not that people are missing your point, they disagree with it. What’s the cut off time by which people are allowed to cancel before their pockets get hurt? You say it’s to avoid getting dolled up for nothing - what about if it takes someone 4 hours to get ready but another person only 1 hour? The same person could cancel 1 hour before the meet but it would affect those two people very differently. There is no universal way to do this that makes sense.

Plus, would it really make you feel that much better to instead have people actively cancelling? I get that it’s the lack of notice that you are upset about, but to be frank the real crux of the issue is the disappointment from thinking you were in for a fun evening and now you’re not. Being actively notified of the cancellation isn’t going to alleviate that. Before long there would be a follow up thread on what we should do with about the people who cancel even per policy.

I would echo what someone else said above which is that if no shows are bothering you so much that you would like to see people financially punished, maybe it’s time to take a break and reassess things.

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By *londebiguyMan
over a year ago

Southport


"Due to increasing number of fantasists who no show without a cancellation message, what can be done? What about a deposit paid to a holding facility (fab), only returned if cancelled up to a certain amount of hours before scheduled meet. Or at least a method of checking a register of persistent no shows. It can't be a one off that they don't show. I had to turn down a few takers for our party because we had enough confirmed attendees until the meet arrived, no show, no message, no excuse. I'm not saying they need a sick note but at least a message saying they can't make it. If we had a club here, fab would be redundant. Anyone any other ideas."

Arranging to meet someone is not a binding contract.

It's a choice and either party should have the choice to change their minds at any time.

Paying is a whole different thing.

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By *nonymous95-2Woman
over a year ago

Northwich

Do both people pay? Or just the person who was asked? I wouldn't meet anyone if money was on the line. I don't even meet people if they want to book a hotel or travel far for the costs. It would deter so many people wanting to meet and would ruin the point of the meet.

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By *ister_ee_1981Man
over a year ago

Sunniest Exeter...


"Do both people pay? Or just the person who was asked? I wouldn't meet anyone if money was on the line. I don't even meet people if they want to book a hotel or travel far for the costs. It would deter so many people wanting to meet and would ruin the point of the meet."

This, and also, who defines who turned up. Let's say both parties turn up, but one party, the next morning decides "no, they didnt" who decides whose telling the truth?

I see the idea, to try to solve a problem, and I'll be honest, I don't know what the solution is, but this is not it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Once sex becomes a transaction, people might as well go to a different kind of service. If you want a guarantee I suggest you connect with people in the real world and don't put all your faith into strangers. "

Well said

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"Due to increasing number of fantasists who no show without a cancellation message, what can be done? What about a deposit paid to a holding facility (fab), only returned if cancelled up to a certain amount of hours before scheduled meet. Or at least a method of checking a register of persistent no shows. It can't be a one off that they don't show. I had to turn down a few takers for our party because we had enough confirmed attendees until the meet arrived, no show, no message, no excuse. I'm not saying they need a sick note but at least a message saying they can't make it. If we had a club here, fab would be redundant. Anyone any other ideas.

That's the most ridiculous idea I have ever read on the forum in my 9 years on Fab.

People are allowed to change their minds and not want to have sex with other people if they want to...

You are lowering fun sex into a pimp type arrangement with that suggestion.

How about you stop expecting people to drop their knickers or pants and provide you with sex

So, you've never seen gangbangs arranged in a hotel where participants are charged to cover costs! I said a returnable deposit if they have the manners to let you know they won't be attending. A simple I/we won't be attending is sufficient. These are from meet verified, phone numbers exchanged and confirmation of attendance the day before. This is all on the back of multiple messages. Aha, the old don't invite strangers nugget of advice from some. So everyone you meet you know? As I said, we've no clubs here, so everyone is a stranger, if it's your first time meeting. Any better ideas?

I don't attend gangbangs, that is not my scene.

I have never had a no show in 9 years on Fab, all the men I have arranged to meet have turned up. So no deposits needed here

Your idea of a deposit held by Fab is completely ludicrous.

I am not missing the point at all.

I do have a better idea for you ..open your own club for your gangbangs.

kinda hard to open a club in this part of the world, when the one that did open was set on fire. Not to mention the 'Sunday world' trying to expose the sexual shenanigans by infiltrating anything fledgling in the casual sex world. We go to chams a few times a year and would you believe it ?? success rate. This talk of oh, what do you expect when meeting strangers. Good advice that considering everyone is a stranger when you join.

My idea of a deposit was a throw in the wind line, just to see if there's any better ideas out there and discuss.

Any action taken against no shows, was based on no one having the courtesy to cancel. That's all."

In your case, have you considered finding someone in your group to host the gangbangs? Private hosts were far from unheard of when I was active in that part of the scene. Holding it at someone's house removes some of the risks involved in no shows

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By *XZRMan
over a year ago

Highland


"Do both people pay? Or just the person who was asked? I wouldn't meet anyone if money was on the line. I don't even meet people if they want to book a hotel or travel far for the costs. It would deter so many people wanting to meet and would ruin the point of the meet.

This, and also, who defines who turned up. Let's say both parties turn up, but one party, the next morning decides "no, they didnt" who decides whose telling the truth?

I see the idea, to try to solve a problem, and I'll be honest, I don't know what the solution is, but this is not it."

Judge Judy.

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By *entle_lover_xMan
over a year ago

Great Dunmow


"Due to increasing number of fantasists who no show without a cancellation message, what can be done? What about a deposit paid to a holding facility (fab), only returned if cancelled up to a certain amount of hours before scheduled meet. Or at least a method of checking a register of persistent no shows. It can't be a one off that they don't show. I had to turn down a few takers for our party because we had enough confirmed attendees until the meet arrived, no show, no message, no excuse. I'm not saying they need a sick note but at least a message saying they can't make it. If we had a club here, fab would be redundant. Anyone any other ideas.

That's the most ridiculous idea I have ever read on the forum in my 9 years on Fab.

People are allowed to change their minds and not want to have sex with other people if they want to...

You are lowering fun sex into a pimp type arrangement with that suggestion.

How about you stop expecting people to drop their knickers or pants and provide you with sex

So, you've never seen gangbangs arranged in a hotel where participants are charged to cover costs! I said a returnable deposit if they have the manners to let you know they won't be attending. A simple I/we won't be attending is sufficient. These are from meet verified, phone numbers exchanged and confirmation of attendance the day before. This is all on the back of multiple messages. Aha, the old don't invite strangers nugget of advice from some. So everyone you meet you know? As I said, we've no clubs here, so everyone is a stranger, if it's your first time meeting. Any better ideas?

I don't attend gangbangs, that is not my scene.

I have never had a no show in 9 years on Fab, all the men I have arranged to meet have turned up. So no deposits needed here

Your idea of a deposit held by Fab is completely ludicrous.

I am not missing the point at all.

I do have a better idea for you ..open your own club for your gangbangs.

kinda hard to open a club in this part of the world, when the one that did open was set on fire. Not to mention the 'Sunday world' trying to expose the sexual shenanigans by infiltrating anything fledgling in the casual sex world. We go to chams a few times a year and would you believe it ?? success rate. This talk of oh, what do you expect when meeting strangers. Good advice that considering everyone is a stranger when you join.

My idea of a deposit was a throw in the wind line, just to see if there's any better ideas out there and discuss.

Any action taken against no shows, was based on no one having the courtesy to cancel. That's all."

Just to say again OP think it is good idea for parties/group events and not far off what happens in many cases. You just need to arrange it yourself. Just paid a deposit on a party myself this morning. It doesn't guarantee anything of course but does get rid of the complete time wasters. I think a lot of people replying here are in the mindset of one one meets for which I think it is not a good idea but for groups yep bring it on.

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By *aria_dreamgirlTV/TS
over a year ago

stockport

If a guy books a room and sends me a confirmation I will definitely meet up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Due to increasing number of fantasists who no show without a cancellation message, what can be done? What about a deposit paid to a holding facility (fab), only returned if cancelled up to a certain amount of hours before scheduled meet. Or at least a method of checking a register of persistent no shows. It can't be a one off that they don't show. I had to turn down a few takers for our party because we had enough confirmed attendees until the meet arrived, no show, no message, no excuse. I'm not saying they need a sick note but at least a message saying they can't make it. If we had a club here, fab would be redundant. Anyone any other ideas.

That's the most ridiculous idea I have ever read on the forum in my 9 years on Fab.

People are allowed to change their minds and not want to have sex with other people if they want to...

You are lowering fun sex into a pimp type arrangement with that suggestion.

How about you stop expecting people to drop their knickers or pants and provide you with sex

So, you've never seen gangbangs arranged in a hotel where participants are charged to cover costs! I said a returnable deposit if they have the manners to let you know they won't be attending. A simple I/we won't be attending is sufficient. These are from meet verified, phone numbers exchanged and confirmation of attendance the day before. This is all on the back of multiple messages. Aha, the old don't invite strangers nugget of advice from some. So everyone you meet you know? As I said, we've no clubs here, so everyone is a stranger, if it's your first time meeting. Any better ideas?

I don't attend gangbangs, that is not my scene.

I have never had a no show in 9 years on Fab, all the men I have arranged to meet have turned up. So no deposits needed here

Your idea of a deposit held by Fab is completely ludicrous.

I am not missing the point at all.

I do have a better idea for you ..open your own club for your gangbangs.

kinda hard to open a club in this part of the world, when the one that did open was set on fire. Not to mention the 'Sunday world' trying to expose the sexual shenanigans by infiltrating anything fledgling in the casual sex world. We go to chams a few times a year and would you believe it ?? success rate. This talk of oh, what do you expect when meeting strangers. Good advice that considering everyone is a stranger when you join.

My idea of a deposit was a throw in the wind line, just to see if there's any better ideas out there and discuss.

Any action taken against no shows, was based on no one having the courtesy to cancel. That's all.

Just to say again OP think it is good idea for parties/group events and not far off what happens in many cases. You just need to arrange it yourself. Just paid a deposit on a party myself this morning. It doesn't guarantee anything of course but does get rid of the complete time wasters. I think a lot of people replying here are in the mindset of one one meets for which I think it is not a good idea but for groups yep bring it on. "

The OP was suggesting that "Fab" handle these deposits.

They did not state group sex only, the suggestion was for Fab in general. They say a deposit for "meets".

If the OP wants to charge deposits, they should do it themselves via another site. It's against Fab rules to ask for any monies.

It is preferable to force people to have sex because they have paid a deposit, rather than accept people change their minds? All sounds very sordid and not fun at all .

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By *exanthemMan
over a year ago

North

GBs arranged in the hotel there is always a few beneficiaries of the deposits or entry fee, it’s not just to pay the room rent. It is against the Fab policy, so they won’t entertain it.

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By *entle_lover_xMan
over a year ago

Great Dunmow


"Due to increasing number of fantasists who no show without a cancellation message, what can be done? What about a deposit paid to a holding facility (fab), only returned if cancelled up to a certain amount of hours before scheduled meet. Or at least a method of checking a register of persistent no shows. It can't be a one off that they don't show. I had to turn down a few takers for our party because we had enough confirmed attendees until the meet arrived, no show, no message, no excuse. I'm not saying they need a sick note but at least a message saying they can't make it. If we had a club here, fab would be redundant. Anyone any other ideas.

That's the most ridiculous idea I have ever read on the forum in my 9 years on Fab.

People are allowed to change their minds and not want to have sex with other people if they want to...

You are lowering fun sex into a pimp type arrangement with that suggestion.

How about you stop expecting people to drop their knickers or pants and provide you with sex

So, you've never seen gangbangs arranged in a hotel where participants are charged to cover costs! I said a returnable deposit if they have the manners to let you know they won't be attending. A simple I/we won't be attending is sufficient. These are from meet verified, phone numbers exchanged and confirmation of attendance the day before. This is all on the back of multiple messages. Aha, the old don't invite strangers nugget of advice from some. So everyone you meet you know? As I said, we've no clubs here, so everyone is a stranger, if it's your first time meeting. Any better ideas?

I don't attend gangbangs, that is not my scene.

I have never had a no show in 9 years on Fab, all the men I have arranged to meet have turned up. So no deposits needed here

Your idea of a deposit held by Fab is completely ludicrous.

I am not missing the point at all.

I do have a better idea for you ..open your own club for your gangbangs.

kinda hard to open a club in this part of the world, when the one that did open was set on fire. Not to mention the 'Sunday world' trying to expose the sexual shenanigans by infiltrating anything fledgling in the casual sex world. We go to chams a few times a year and would you believe it ?? success rate. This talk of oh, what do you expect when meeting strangers. Good advice that considering everyone is a stranger when you join.

My idea of a deposit was a throw in the wind line, just to see if there's any better ideas out there and discuss.

Any action taken against no shows, was based on no one having the courtesy to cancel. That's all.

Just to say again OP think it is good idea for parties/group events and not far off what happens in many cases. You just need to arrange it yourself. Just paid a deposit on a party myself this morning. It doesn't guarantee anything of course but does get rid of the complete time wasters. I think a lot of people replying here are in the mindset of one one meets for which I think it is not a good idea but for groups yep bring it on.

The OP was suggesting that "Fab" handle these deposits.

They did not state group sex only, the suggestion was for Fab in general. They say a deposit for "meets".

If the OP wants to charge deposits, they should do it themselves via another site. It's against Fab rules to ask for any monies.

It is preferable to force people to have sex because they have paid a deposit, rather than accept people change their minds? All sounds very sordid and not fun at all .

"

Yes and I said not a good idea for Fab and do it yourself. OP also referred to parties/groups.

Not sure on Fab rules regarding parties and groups and asking for money. If it against rules then a huge number of party organisers are in trouble as it is VERY common and openly advertised. Ditto for groups socials as well. It seems they perhaps you have not experienced that world so perhaps keep an open mind. Paying a deposit or paying to attend is not forcing anybody to have sex. It is way of ensuring people are semi-serious about attending and so not left with lack of people and also if some costs are involved that organisers are not left with big loss.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Aim to not hold Fab or anyone else responsible but yourself and the people who fail to turn up.

A site could potentially have a 2 way agreed commitment to meet, so it would have something to track and confirmation, that all parties understood what was agreed to.

Otherwise, take on board what you can control. Who and how you're arranging things. Don't repeat systems that don't work.

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By *oveToLickJuicypussyMan
over a year ago

Wigan

Not fair on us non verified though wed never get chance to be verified

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Not fair on us non verified though wed never get chance to be verified "

Go to a club or go on Cam to get verified

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By *_the_impalerMan
over a year ago

canterbury

Surely you don’t give them a verification!!

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By *iger4uWoman
over a year ago

In my happy place

Don't host.

Go out to play.

Simple.

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