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Online indicators

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By *ntilogically OP   Man
over a year ago

Somewhere between Newport and Cardiff

I try to message the women on here when I can see that they're online, because I know they have a huge volume of messages to sort through when they get online, and I don't want to be at the bottom of pile. I'm getting really frustrated though by the inconsistency of those blue dot indicators. Time and time again I've been checking a member's profile page to see that they're online when I press send, and then once I do the site returns me to a profile showing they've been offline for 5-10 mins.

I have separate windows open. One to message, and the other to refresh the profile page, how there be a 10 minute difference?

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ed-monkeyCouple
over a year ago

Hailsham

I guess it's just a matter of the refresh rate between the last activity by the user in question and the online/offline status

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *penbicoupleCouple
over a year ago

Northampton


"I try to message the women on here when I can see that they're online...

I have separate windows open. One to message, and the other to refresh the profile page, how there be a 10 minute difference? "

I'm not gonna lie, that sounds creepy af!

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If every guy thinks like you then women will be bombarded soon as they appear online.. just send your message and if you get a reply bingo if not move on

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *penbicoupleCouple
over a year ago

Northampton


"If every guy thinks like you then women will be bombarded soon as they appear online.."

We are!

Hate coming online and getting extra messages all of a sudden. Makes me want to go offline immediately.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If every guy thinks like you then women will be bombarded soon as they appear online..

We are!

Hate coming online and getting extra messages all of a sudden. Makes me want to go offline immediately."

Exactly..

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ntilogically OP   Man
over a year ago

Somewhere between Newport and Cardiff

[Removed by poster at 03/12/22 18:35:21]

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ntilogically OP   Man
over a year ago

Somewhere between Newport and Cardiff


"I try to message the women on here when I can see that they're online...

I have separate windows open. One to message, and the other to refresh the profile page, how there be a 10 minute difference?

I'm not gonna lie, that sounds creepy af! "

And that's another thing I hate.

All I'm trying to do is increase the chances that a message will be read. If it is read and I get no answer I move on, even blocking them so I'm not tempted again. For a site used by supposedly open minded people it's amazing how judgmental some can be

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ntilogically OP   Man
over a year ago

Somewhere between Newport and Cardiff

Everyone totally missing the fucking point

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By *udeNTw1stedMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

.......

Not sure people are missing the point.

You are right, single females and also couples can get lot's of messages per day.

But that doesn't always mean messages get lost because of the amount received.

Messages generally don't get responded to for a number of reasons.

Some look at a profile without opening the message. So may not think the profile they read fits what they want.

Some see the start of a message without opening it and think the person is not for them.

Some may read the message then click the button that would show the message unread as again the person might not be for them.

Alot of people would rather have an option to remove the show online bit. So they can come on and browse themselves without having tons of messages being sent just because they are online.

What you have to think is everyone uses the site differently and to their own needs.

So just because someone is online when you view their profile doesn't mean they want to receive more messages than what they already have.

Send a message whether they are online or offline. Chances are if you peek their interest they will respond regardless of where that message ends up in their inbox.

Online or not, if your message/profile doesn't fit what they want. They would delete it anyway.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No need to swear, your missing the point from a womans point of view, if you think women get 100s of mails and you wanna be on top so do 100s of other guys so they will message too so youll likely be down the list again

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *penbicoupleCouple
over a year ago

Northampton


"Everyone totally missing the fucking point"

You're the one missing the point.

You explained a behaviour you engage in to try to jump the queue and I explained how that can seem creepy and makes things here uncomfortable for many of us.

Maybe take that as a learning experience. Or get all hurt and dismiss it as 'judgment.' Either way, the method you are employing is ineffective and annoying.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ntilogically OP   Man
over a year ago

Somewhere between Newport and Cardiff


"Not sure people are missing the point.

You are right, single females and also couples can get lot's of messages per day.

But that doesn't always mean messages get lost because of the amount received.

Messages generally don't get responded to for a number of reasons.

Some look at a profile without opening the message. So may not think the profile they read fits what they want.

Some see the start of a message without opening it and think the person is not for them.

Some may read the message then click the button that would show the message unread as again the person might not be for them.

Alot of people would rather have an option to remove the show online bit. So they can come on and browse themselves without having tons of messages being sent just because they are online.

What you have to think is everyone uses the site differently and to their own needs.

So just because someone is online when you view their profile doesn't mean they want to receive more messages than what they already have.

Send a message whether they are online or offline. Chances are if you peek their interest they will respond regardless of where that message ends up in their inbox.

Online or not, if your message/profile doesn't fit what they want. They would delete it anyway.

"

Why show if someone is online or not then?

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle


"I try to message the women on here when I can see that they're online...

I have separate windows open. One to message, and the other to refresh the profile page, how there be a 10 minute difference?

I'm not gonna lie, that sounds creepy af! "

Totally agree

Once they've gone through their list of messages would eventually come across its more like stalking behaviour in a strange way

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *udeNTw1stedMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

.......

OP. It's how the site works.

It isn't a green light to message someone.

As I say, regarless of whether they are online or not when you message.

If your message interests them. They will reply.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ntilogically OP   Man
over a year ago

Somewhere between Newport and Cardiff


"Everyone totally missing the fucking point

You're the one missing the point.

You explained a behaviour you engage in to try to jump the queue and I explained how that can seem creepy and makes things here uncomfortable for many of us.

Maybe take that as a learning experience. Or get all hurt and dismiss it as 'judgment.' Either way, the method you are employing is ineffective and annoying."

The point was about the way the site fails to update the online status, which only one person has actually commented on. I wasn't asking for advice on how to message people, and the so called advice I am getting seems to ignore the fact that every list is ordered according to WHEN users were last online.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ntilogically OP   Man
over a year ago

Somewhere between Newport and Cardiff


"I try to message the women on here when I can see that they're online...

I have separate windows open. One to message, and the other to refresh the profile page, how there be a 10 minute difference?

I'm not gonna lie, that sounds creepy af!

Totally agree

Once they've gone through their list of messages would eventually come across its more like stalking behaviour in a strange way "

How can a single attempt to message be considered stalking?

Stalking is a criminal act, and falsely accusing someone of such an act could itself be punishable in certain circumstances

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ntilogically OP   Man
over a year ago

Somewhere between Newport and Cardiff


"Everyone totally missing the fucking point

You're the one missing the point.

You explained a behaviour you engage in to try to jump the queue and I explained how that can seem creepy and makes things here uncomfortable for many of us.

Maybe take that as a learning experience. Or get all hurt and dismiss it as 'judgment.' Either way, the method you are employing is ineffective and annoying."

I read profiles. I know how many messages women get. I also know how disrespectful they often are.

You're assuming I'm one of those, judging by the rhetoric you're using. Don't.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle


"I try to message the women on here when I can see that they're online...

I have separate windows open. One to message, and the other to refresh the profile page, how there be a 10 minute difference?

I'm not gonna lie, that sounds creepy af!

Totally agree

Once they've gone through their list of messages would eventually come across its more like stalking behaviour in a strange way

How can a single attempt to message be considered stalking?

Stalking is a criminal act, and falsely accusing someone of such an act could itself be punishable in certain circumstances "

please read back what you originally commented it says a long the line time and time again which would indicate more than once

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ntilogically OP   Man
over a year ago

Somewhere between Newport and Cardiff


"I try to message the women on here when I can see that they're online...

I have separate windows open. One to message, and the other to refresh the profile page, how there be a 10 minute difference?

I'm not gonna lie, that sounds creepy af!

Totally agree

Once they've gone through their list of messages would eventually come across its more like stalking behaviour in a strange way

How can a single attempt to message be considered stalking?

Stalking is a criminal act, and falsely accusing someone of such an act could itself be punishable in certain circumstances

please read back what you originally commented it says a long the line time and time again which would indicate more than once "

Please engage a brain cell, read back my original comment, and realise I was referring to my experience of messaging DIFFERENT profiles. In fact there's no reason to think otherwise, unless you have some kind of prejudice and you're actively looking for a reason to attack someone

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle


"I try to message the women on here when I can see that they're online...

I have separate windows open. One to message, and the other to refresh the profile page, how there be a 10 minute difference?

I'm not gonna lie, that sounds creepy af!

Totally agree

Once they've gone through their list of messages would eventually come across its more like stalking behaviour in a strange way

How can a single attempt to message be considered stalking?

Stalking is a criminal act, and falsely accusing someone of such an act could itself be punishable in certain circumstances

please read back what you originally commented it says a long the line time and time again which would indicate more than once

Please engage a brain cell, read back my original comment, and realise I was referring to my experience of messaging DIFFERENT profiles. In fact there's no reason to think otherwise, unless you have some kind of prejudice and you're actively looking for a reason to attack someone "

Good luck pal

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

To answer what I think you’re asking - there’s always been a 5/10 minute delay where you’re offline but still show as online. I can go on joint profile and single one still shows online for a while after I’ve come off.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *penbicoupleCouple
over a year ago

Northampton


" You're assuming I'm one of those, judging by the rhetoric you're using. Don't. "

One of those what? What are you referring to?

Please don't tell me what to assume or not assume. I was in fact assessing your actions based on the description and motivations of that behaviour, which you provided. So, no assumption at all.

You state you know how many messages women get, but apparently you simply want to add to that by jumping the queue and messaging the second they come on.

A number here have told you how they don't like that behaviour and how it effectively makes them feel harrassed the second they arrive on fab. I'm genuinely puzzled why you would not choose to learn from that.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ldbutrandyMan
over a year ago

West Midlands

This post reinforces , not that it needs it . That too many guys are looking for something there's not enough of for them, couples / women.

Women and couples get too many unwanted messages, sometimes multiple ones, even after stating no interest.

Frustration all round.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

I wish there was actually a way to hide that dot that shows that I'm online. I don't know why anyone needs to know that someone is anyhow.I know I get messages at times when I'm online and it doesn't make me look at them any faster and I have tight filters so I get very few messages anyhow . So it's not increasing your chances at all messaging when someone is online op. There are lots of reasons people don't read messages getting them when offline is pretty far down the list I would think.

In answer to your question not everyone logs out I know I don't and the blue dot stays on until 5 minutes after there has been no activity on the account. That's why you see an inconsistency.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich


"

Why show if someone is online or not then?"

It's so if someone sends you a random fr you can accept it when they are offline, perve their friends only pics and then remove them from your friends list so they can't see yours.

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