FabSwingers.com forum: Gender definitions

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I think the site needs to review their gender definitions.

Or at least update or split a few

TV and TS are not the same.

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By *ittyandtheboyCouple
over a year ago

Behind the bike shed!

"I think the site needs to review their gender definitions.

Or at least update or split a few

TV and TS are not the same. "

Seconded

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By *iss Sassy PantsWoman
over a year ago

Nottingham

TS's should change to female.

Ends the discussion nicely in our favour. If you're TS, it implies youre on a transition pathway, so you're probably already identifying as a woman so do the good thing and live that here.

...like myself.

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By *amantha TSWoman
over a year ago

Swindon

But TV and CD are not the same. Agree the current system is not perfect, but unless you're going to go into fully granular detail including non-binary, gender fluid et al, the current system (though it is blunt) keeps things simple.

As for all TS changing to women - not all TS are male to female? Would have thought someone on their own journey might have been a bit more considerate for those on the opposite path?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"TS's should change to female.

Ends the discussion nicely in our favour. If you're TS, it implies youre on a transition pathway, so you're probably already identifying as a woman so do the good thing and live that here.

...like myself."

You're not "a woman" you're a transexual.

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By *ittyandtheboyCouple
over a year ago

Behind the bike shed!

"TS's should change to female.

Ends the discussion nicely in our favour. If you're TS, it implies youre on a transition pathway, so you're probably already identifying as a woman so do the good thing and live that here.

...like myself."

100% agree!

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By *iss Sassy PantsWoman
over a year ago

Nottingham

In law, I am.

Thanks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"TS's should change to female.

Ends the discussion nicely in our favour. If you're TS, it implies youre on a transition pathway, so you're probably already identifying as a woman so do the good thing and live that here.

...like myself."

I have to agree with another poster here, you’re a trans woman.

You’ll never have a period, never give birth, never experience the menopause... you’re different, not in any negative sense but biologically and through life experience there’s big differences, especially in the eyes of many females.

It seems contradictory that so many people of the trans spectrum demand divides and sub categories within our own community but then preach about their entitlement to be absolutely integrated into a grouping that birth never afforded them.

Why people can’t be proud of the person they are I don’t get tbh.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"TS's should change to female.

Ends the discussion nicely in our favour. If you're TS, it implies youre on a transition pathway, so you're probably already identifying as a woman so do the good thing and live that here.

...like myself.

I have to agree with another poster here, you’re a trans woman.

Why people can’t be proud of the person they are I don’t get tbh.

That's a bit harsh to be honest.

Why can't people just leave other people alone and let them identify as they want.

There are women that cannot give birth, have periods, go through the menopause ect. Does that make them not women too.

Yes a trans woman was born a man but please don't knock them in this way, it sounds very J.K. Rowling.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"TS's should change to female.

Ends the discussion nicely in our favour. If you're TS, it implies youre on a transition pathway, so you're probably already identifying as a woman so do the good thing and live that here.

...like myself.

I have to agree with another poster here, you’re a trans woman.

Why people can’t be proud of the person they are I don’t get tbh.

That's a bit harsh to be honest.

Why can't people just leave other people alone and let them identify as they want.

There are women that cannot give birth, have periods, go through the menopause ect. Does that make them not women too.

Yes a trans woman was born a man but please don't knock them in this way, it sounds very J.K. Rowling.

It’s not harsh at all... it’s just a fact.

There’s zero said in that about rights, that’s the important element. The bottom line is trans women are different, we have to accept that and more importantly embrace and celebrate the people we are.

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By *iss Sassy PantsWoman
over a year ago

Nottingham

Wow! Just wow. Transphobia from within! Few posts leave me truly speechless,

Biological essentialism is horrific.

My cis girlfriend, born female didn’t have periods, didn’t have the necessary to have them so guess that doesn’t make her a woman either.

Vaginal agenisis didn’t make her less of a woman either i guess…

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By *ream2972TV/TS
over a year ago

newquay

"Wow! Just wow. Transphobia from within! Few posts leave me truly speechless,

Biological essentialism is horrific.

My cis girlfriend, born female didn’t have periods, didn’t have the necessary to have them so guess that doesn’t make her a woman either.

Vaginal agenisis didn’t make her less of a woman either i guess…"

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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago

Dudley

"Wow! Just wow. Transphobia from within! Few posts leave me truly speechless,

Biological essentialism is horrific.

My cis girlfriend, born female didn’t have periods, didn’t have the necessary to have them so guess that doesn’t make her a woman either.

Vaginal agenisis didn’t make her less of a woman either i guess…"

Tbf, aren't you the one that said all TS's should be changed to women? What about female to male?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think the site needs to review their gender definitions.

Or at least update or split a few

TV and TS are not the same. "

Agreed x

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By *inkywife1981Couple
over a year ago

A town near you

Can one not simply create a profile and select Female as the gender if that's how they identify?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

why is the human race and the site so hell bent on giving everyone tags,

we have a brain and the power to decide who and what we are and who or what we meet.

cd is different to others I agree but instead of argueing the statement Trans covers everything but we should remove the Male female tags also

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By *nliveneTV/TS
over a year ago

Selby

"Can one not simply create a profile and select Female as the gender if that's how they identify?

Completely agree with you , i myself i'm pre op transgender woman , my ID legally shows my gender as woman and i live my life as my gender full time , the way i choosed to setup my profile is and was my choice.

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By *unmatt888Man
over a year ago

Duns

I think it’s a bit of a minefield, but at least one more option might be useful - along with transmen.

I think if you’re going down that road though then it’s also worth looking at couples, as there are no specific options for TV/TS members of couples.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Reading with interest, throwing transphobia out there does not end a conversation nor does citing jkr. I am supporting a friend female to male I have very mixed views, questions, and yet there seems no space to have an open dialogue without being people being deemed transphobic or a non crime crime.

I'd love to discuss things openly, I'd like to hear differing views and insights. This helps people to understand. To think about things.

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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago

Dudley

"Reading with interest, throwing transphobia out there does not end a conversation nor does citing jkr. I am supporting a friend female to male I have very mixed views, questions, and yet there seems no space to have an open dialogue without being people being deemed transphobic or a non crime crime.

I'd love to discuss things openly, I'd like to hear differing views and insights. This helps people to understand. To think about things."

Totally agree.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In law, I am.

Thanks."

I second that !

Legally , passport , driving licence …..no ducument says “Trans woman” or “Transgender”.

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By *an CraigMan
over a year ago

Keith

"TS's should change to female.

Ends the discussion nicely in our favour. If you're TS, it implies youre on a transition pathway, so you're probably already identifying as a woman so do the good thing and live that here.

...like myself."

That's all well and good post op but if I was chatting to a woman turned up for a meet and found a biological male in a skirt waiting for me I'd be pretty pissed off.

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By *usic TrishTV/TS
over a year ago

Kelty

"I think the site needs to review their gender definitions.

Or at least update or split a few

TV and TS are not the same. "

I'm transgender. I'm a transwomen. I agree totally that there needs to be a change in terms used.

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By *usic TrishTV/TS
over a year ago

Kelty

"In law, I am.

Thanks."

In law I'm a woman as well. My NHS number is female, my passport and driving licence is female. We're female. To say we're not is what feeds prejudice and stirs up police JK Rowling to write against us.

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By *ogerBottomsMan
over a year ago

Aberdare

"TS's should change to female.

Ends the discussion nicely in our favour. If you're TS, it implies youre on a transition pathway, so you're probably already identifying as a woman so do the good thing and live that here.

...like myself."

Well, you can identify as a woman on here if you want to, as you prove. Others might choose to identify as TV or TS. I agree that the classification should be divided.

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By *ogerBottomsMan
over a year ago

Aberdare

"That's all well and good post op but if I was chatting to a woman turned up for a meet and found a biological male in a skirt waiting for me I'd be pretty pissed off."

We've all had meets where things aren't as expected. Some people choose to identify as non-smokers with no tattoos, and when you arrive, there's a full ashtray and a sleeve going on. It's up to you then whether it's an issue and whether you stay or go.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This subject has been done to death on the forums and always descends into arguments.

If Fab haven’t changed the genders so far then it’s unlikely to happen.

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By *an CraigMan
over a year ago

Keith

"That's all well and good post op but if I was chatting to a woman turned up for a meet and found a biological male in a skirt waiting for me I'd be pretty pissed off.

I think finding out that someone smokes or has a tattoo is slightly different to finding out they have a cock

a smoker could choose to not smoke before a meet, fresh clothes and not stink of smoke and if a tattoo really offended someone it could be covered. Not quite the same when it comes to 9 inches of "hey, I've been looking forward to you coming over"

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By *nvincible ButterflyWoman
over a year ago

LEEDS

Wow at the amount of transphobia on this post! It's 2021 fabsters and we are supposed to be an open minded community. Some swingers need a head wobble before they start making judgy comments like "you aren't a woman". You can be any thing you want to be in this day and age.

There's over multiple gender identities now and fab should be reflecting that. TV/TS doesn't cover everyone who isn't cisgendered.

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By *an CraigMan
over a year ago

Keith

"Wow at the amount of transphobia on this post! It's 2021 fabsters and we are supposed to be an open minded community. Some swingers need a head wobble before they start making judgy comments like "you aren't a woman". You can be any thing you want to be in this day and age.

There's over multiple gender identities now and fab should be reflecting that. TV/TS doesn't cover everyone who isn't cisgendered."

Rejecting people's rights to self identify isn't the issue for me. Honestly it's none of my business what people want to call themselves and I couldn't care less, right up until the point where a "woman" and I are arranging to meet and I find out that she is a biological male.

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By *nvincible ButterflyWoman
over a year ago

LEEDS

There's over multiple gender identities now and fab should be reflecting that. TV/TS doesn't cover everyone who isn't cisgendered.

If she's fully transitioned and had the gender reassignment then should it be an issue?

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By *an CraigMan
over a year ago

Keith

If she's fully transitioned and had the gender reassignment then should it be an issue?"

Personally I would still want to know beforehand but if all the female parts were there and she looked good then no it probably wouldn't be an issue.

My issue is when everything says female and you find out they still have a cock, and the "pussy" they want to get fucked in is actually just an arsehole.

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By *tace 309TV/TS
over a year ago

durham

If she's fully transitioned and had the gender reassignment then should it be an issue?

Personally I would still want to know beforehand but if all the female parts were there and she looked good then no it probably wouldn't be an issue.

My issue is when everything says female and you find out they still have a cock, and the "pussy" they want to get fucked in is actually just an arsehole."
i dont think there are that many tvs or pre op ts that make the claim to be fully female. If you are, looking at the, tv /ts category on here then surely you must realise you aren't getting the real deal.

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By *nvincible ButterflyWoman
over a year ago

LEEDS

If she's fully transitioned and had the gender reassignment then should it be an issue?

Personally I would still want to know beforehand but if all the female parts were there and she looked good then no it probably wouldn't be an issue.

My issue is when everything says female and you find out they still have a cock, and the "pussy" they want to get fucked in is actually just an arsehole. i dont think there are that many tvs or pre op ts that make the claim to be fully female. If you are, looking at the, tv /ts category on here then surely you must realise you aren't getting the real deal. "

This

Once a trans woman is post op then she's a woman and can be a woman on here. It shouldn't be the issue some make it out to be

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By *jorkishMan
over a year ago

Seaforth

I agree that it should be divided. But a pre op trans woman or man should I hope be honest with anyone they are planning to meet with then that person has the choice. If they aren't honest and the person turns up and find they have a cock or a vagina then they should expect the person to walk away, hopefully, with any abuse

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The OP makes a completely valid point in the first message.

Gender categories should be reflective of the law. Where a person describes themselves as non binary (as should be an option) it can then be a discussion between them and any potential people wishing to meet, as to what the details are.

The moderators should be checking this thread for any trans phobic comments and taking appropriate action where necessary, some of which I'm worried by. For people to believe that birth gender is definitive, is an amazing ignorance.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is clearly no pleasing everyone on this topic and I have to wonder if the people that take issue are having a hard time arranging the meets they want or is it more of a political statement?

If fully transitioned MTF for example and you identify more as female then register as female, it's easy to put 'trans female' in your profile header and make it clear to others that you're not biologically female from the get go, if you're not comfortable with that then stay registered as tv/ts and describe yourself in your profile.

Forgive me if anything I've said has offended thee, it seems no matter what we say or do surrounding this topic it offends someone somewhere and I'm tired of walking on eggshells, this is more harmful than anything! I've been corrected before and told by those who aren't even trans that I'm offending them by not being pc enough. Fuck that shit! Call me what you like and we'll get on just fine, we are people of all shades, being trans is a very small part of my life x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There is clearly no pleasing everyone on this topic and I have to wonder if the people that take issue are having a hard time arranging the meets they want or is it more of a political statement?

I do find it amusing when someone who isnt one of "us" tells me what I should be offended by

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There is clearly no pleasing everyone on this topic and I have to wonder if the people that take issue are having a hard time arranging the meets they want or is it more of a political statement?

I do find it amusing when someone who isnt one of "us" tells me what I should be offended by"

I know right, it's like we don't get a say because we're not as willing to go scream down the houses of Parliament as the ones who end up seen and heard, of which I believe are a minority

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By *inkywife1981Couple
over a year ago

A town near you

Just to complicate things I'm sure there are plenty of straight heterosexual males with female profiles on here

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By *i KinkyThorntonCouple
over a year ago

THORNTON-CLEVELEYS

"TS's should change to female.

Ends the discussion nicely in our favour. If you're TS, it implies youre on a transition pathway, so you're probably already identifying as a woman so do the good thing and live that here.

...like myself.

I have to agree with another poster here, you’re a trans woman.

Why people can’t be proud of the person they are I don’t get tbh.

"
We couldn't of put it better ourselves so many different points of view but at end of day

I Lucy will always be a trans woman doesn't mean I look differently at anyone on the spectrum and will never judge

But harsh truth there will always be some divide in the community

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By *i KinkyThorntonCouple
over a year ago

THORNTON-CLEVELEYS

"I think it’s a bit of a minefield, but at least one more option might be useful - along with transmen.

I think if you’re going down that road though then it’s also worth looking at couples, as there are no specific options for TV/TS members of couples. "

Yes very true we struggle with this

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By *himp_KittenCouple
over a year ago

Preston

We can't offer much in the way of opinion on gender definitions, we haven't walked that path. All we can say is no matter what you identify as you're all beautiful people and be proud of who you are x

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