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"This whole thread is just designed to wind people up and frankly the subject has been done to death." My intentions are noble, and I resent your attitude. If you say that the topic had been done to death, pray tell what was the revolution? Was there a resolution, or were there just needless insults and pointless yawns? Now you have wound me up. Doing that often here? | |||
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"This whole thread is just designed to wind people up and frankly the subject has been done to death. My intentions are noble, and I resent your attitude. If you say that the topic had been done to death, pray tell what was the revolution? Was there a resolution, or were there just needless insults and pointless yawns? Now you have wound me up. Doing that often here?" See the point I raised…if a TS is now a woman or man pre or post op, why even have a TS tag at all ? They now live or actually are the sex they feel they are, so can categories themselves as that sex. | |||
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" See the point I raised…if a TS is now a woman or man pre or post op, why even have a TS tag at all ? They now live or actually are the sex they feel they are... " Thank you for the question. I can see where you are going, but this would be a matter of a completely separate discussion. It is not for you or I to decide which category other people want to use for themselves. All I want is the freedom to chose between the categories, not force anybody to conform to any of the categories. | |||
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"I have met & had fun with TVs & TS pre & post op , why worry about trying to fit people into exact categories? " Because most folks who are TS would rather not be labelled and categorised as a cross dresser. TS’s should en masse chsnge their gender market in Fab to their new gender and ditch the TV//CD association | |||
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"People say that tv/ts is fine and encompasses us all. The vast majority of people here actively looking for tv/ts are looking for a girl/woman with the horrid term of “a little bit extra” and ……" Sorry missed the end of that train of thought …..when they find out that’s long gone , they’re not longer interested | |||
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"I love these conversations. Have a look back through these conversations and see how many times it’s the same people that are saying from the top of their lungs that there’s no need for it. Then go onto see whether these people are from the group that are actually asking for more representative description. Hmm , many of them ? People say that we should put in our profile and let others work it out. We all know people don’t read profiles. People say that tv/ts is fine and encompasses us all. The vast majority of people here actively looking for tv/ts are looking for a girl/woman with the horrid term of “a little bit extra” and People say we should join as a woman. The large majority of males looking in that category do not entertain the idea of being with a post op woman. And just FYI, although I am a woman , I also very proud of my trans past, I don’t want to hide that , it’s part of what makes me , me . People say we shouldn’t label ourselves. Fab requires us to label ourselves as part of registration to the site. People tell us …….. hang on, has anyone actually listened to our experiences and what we would like to happen rather than trying to tell us what how we should feel and that our experiences here are invalid ? As always, listening to those that it affects and learning from others people’s experiences will always lead to respect and understanding " Sorry I've just read your post and do tend to agree with you. If there was a separate category would you no longer class yourself as a woman? Not trying to be awful just curious to know which you would prefer x | |||
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"I could be wrong but it appears some of the women commenting are trans women who now categorise them selves as "women". So why don't transwomen just do this. Trans is a wide spectrum especially on here, are we going to have sub categories like TV, CD etc. " Thank you for perfectly highlighting my post, another person trying to tell transwomen what to do without listening to them as they try to explain their experiences | |||
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"I have met & had fun with TVs & TS pre & post op , why worry about trying to fit people into exact categories? Because most folks who are TS would rather not be labelled and categorised as a cross dresser. TS’s should en masse chsnge their gender market in Fab to their new gender and ditch the TV//CD association " transition takes some people a long time & a lot of that time they are not physically that much different from a tv or cd | |||
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"I could be wrong but it appears some of the women commenting are trans women who now categorise them selves as "women". So why don't transwomen just do this. Trans is a wide spectrum especially on here, are we going to have sub categories like TV, CD etc. Thank you for perfectly highlighting my post, another person trying to tell transwomen what to do without listening to them as they try to explain their experiences " I hadn't read you post when I first replied. Please look at my second post after I had. If there was a category for Trans woman would you no longer class yourself as a woman on here? Be genuinely interested to know which you would prefer. I do accept there is a huge difference with women like yourself who have fully transitioned. Personally I think a separate category would work if you don't feel comfortable under the "Woman" category (obviously referring to Fab only). | |||
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"Let's not keep rehashing this subject " I'm sick to death of this topic. We don't need separate groups. This group is small enough anyway. Now can we bin it once and for all before all hell breaks loose. Let's just get on with our lives, x | |||
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"I hadn't read you post when I first replied. Please look at my second post after I had. If there was a category for Trans woman would you no longer class yourself as a woman on here? Be genuinely interested to know which you would prefer. I do accept there is a huge difference with women like yourself who have fully transitioned. Personally I think a separate category would work if you don't feel comfortable under the "Woman" category (obviously referring to Fab only)." Upon reading back my post, it came across as far more bitchy than I had intended, my sincere apologies for that As for me, I have had “tv/ts” and I have had “woman” as my profile. For me “woman” is the best choice of what’s available but I’m so proud of my trans background too so yes, as far as a swinger site is concerned I probably would choose “transwoman” if it was available. I think for me, the main point is that it’s always important to listen to those who are trying to express their experiences on both sides of the fence. I would absolutely love to hear the experiences of those who this would negatively affect so that I could understand their views better but it seems to be the same old arguments without any real insight. For those that feel negatively about it please do say how it would affect you without resorting to “there’s too many choices”, “why label yourselves”, “no one wants it” , we’ve heard those before and why are more choices a bad thing, when labels are mandatory why would it be bad to have more appropriate labels available and finally the frequency with which this comes up should make it obvious people do want it | |||
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"Let's not keep rehashing this subject I'm sick to death of this topic. We don't need separate groups. This group is small enough anyway. Now can we bin it once and for all before all hell breaks loose. Let's just get on with our lives, x" You maybe sick of it because it’s not important to you, to others it is and they are sick of not having a more relevant option . Should they just shut up and put up? | |||
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"I hadn't read you post when I first replied. Please look at my second post after I had. If there was a category for Trans woman would you no longer class yourself as a woman on here? Be genuinely interested to know which you would prefer. I do accept there is a huge difference with women like yourself who have fully transitioned. Personally I think a separate category would work if you don't feel comfortable under the "Woman" category (obviously referring to Fab only). Upon reading back my post, it came across as far more bitchy than I had intended, my sincere apologies for that As for me, I have had “tv/ts” and I have had “woman” as my profile. For me “woman” is the best choice of what’s available but I’m so proud of my trans background too so yes, as far as a swinger site is concerned I probably would choose “transwoman” if it was available. I think for me, the main point is that it’s always important to listen to those who are trying to express their experiences on both sides of the fence. I would absolutely love to hear the experiences of those who this would negatively affect so that I could understand their views better but it seems to be the same old arguments without any real insight. For those that feel negatively about it please do say how it would affect you without resorting to “there’s too many choices”, “why label yourselves”, “no one wants it” , we’ve heard those before and why are more choices a bad thing, when labels are mandatory why would it be bad to have more appropriate labels available and finally the frequency with which this comes up should make it obvious people do want it " Personally I don't think it would matter to me. I would consider myself on the trans spectrum but I'm not fulltime and have no plans to transition. I would consider myself different to some one who dresses purely for sex and definitely to some hairy bloke who puts on his wife panties and calls himself a TV. I would also accept there is a difference between someone in my position and someone who lives fulltime and may have gone through transition. I can also see your point about having to explain your situation to a potential meet if you are in the woman category. Maybe a Transwoman category for people like yourself is the answer. I can also see why some would prefer to be in the "woman" group. That extra group would offer a choice and wouldn't be difficult for Fab to sort x | |||
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"….thanks for speaking for all of us. We need this subject ending via negotiation and a site wide poll" I wasn't speaking for anyone other than myself while I was having a discussion with another member. Bit strange you want discussion but don't want other peoples opinions. | |||
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"….thanks for speaking for all of us. We need this subject ending via negotiation and a site wide poll I wasn't speaking for anyone other than myself while I was having a discussion with another member. Bit strange you want discussion but don't want other peoples opinions. " The way you’d worded it sounded, shall we say, … was assumptive. | |||
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"….thanks for speaking for all of us. We need this subject ending via negotiation and a site wide poll I wasn't speaking for anyone other than myself while I was having a discussion with another member. Bit strange you want discussion but don't want other peoples opinions. The way you’d worded it sounded, shall we say, … was assumptive. " I think we shouldn't assume anything. However I did note you telling all TSs to move themselves into the female category. Perhaps you feel only your opinion counts. | |||
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"I know this is has been an ongoing debate on here but yes I think they should be separated. As the OP says, there's a big difference between TV and TS. There's no reason why Fab shouldn't separate them x" Issue is how do you police it? A guy cant say there a woman on here or they get banned correct? So wouldnt it be the same if i was to put myself in the TS catagory? I look in reality no different to a pre op TS... Will fab start asking for proof of your goverment issued gender, like a driving lisence? I think alot of you seem to fall for the typical Tranny Tiers that seems to be about, were TS's look down on TV's. It's well known within the community. My guess is alot of TV's see threads like this and feel its the same shit as that | |||
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"Maybe the transsexuals should either accept the current situation on here or just jump ship.Sick and tired of this subject keep being brought up Absolutely nothing against TS as opposed to TV but the subject is getting rather tedious. " So in Pride season a member of the lgbt community is telling another in that community that they shouldn’t fight for something they believe in and accept the status quo for the happiness of others. To not rock the boat. Errr okay , forgive me while I quietly shake my head and weap in the corner. And as for how do we police it…. for real ? All we’re talking about is having other options to help people express their authentic selves, no ones talking about identity theft here. Nothing at present stops a man creating a female profile and you’re concerned about someone misrepresenting where the fall on the trans spectrum? Another argument I saw was about the “hierarchy” of transness. No one here is suggesting that any one section of the spectrum is more valid or worthwhile or better than any other, just that there are inherent differences in what it means when meeting sexually for each of us. Once again I ask how can it possibly be bad to have more options to allow people to express themselves fully ? | |||
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" Regardless of what we all think its highly unlikely that Fab will do anything about it though." This is the ultimate irony isn’t it. I totally 100% believe that there enough interest and need for more categories but I also 100% believe that this site will never make the change. I totally get why it’s frustrating to see the topic come up time and again and there being no hope for it ever to happen. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t blame the site owners or mods for not making the change , it’s a product of the site being free to join. It’s not exactly an eye popping feast of ultra modern web design but then again it’s also not massively commercial either. So the site kinda sits here and does what it’s always done because if it ain’t broke why fix it. That’s just my realist side coming out. I’m sure the argument will rave on for sometime more and we’ll see the same faces come out with the same arguments why not to and whilst I realistically know it’s not going to happen, I fully believe it should and I’ll defend that position against people who think we should just shut up and put up. After all we never make progress in the lgbt community just by staying with the status quo and not opening up for discussion | |||
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"I have met & had fun with TVs & TS pre & post op , why worry about trying to fit people into exact categories? " It's beyond tedious. These people trying to categorise people into more & more boxes. | |||
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"Leave it as is. Works fine. " … in your view. Many other people have said it isn’t | |||
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"Maybe the transsexuals should either accept the current situation on here or just jump ship.Sick and tired of this subject keep being brought up Absolutely nothing against TS as opposed to TV but the subject is getting rather tedious. So in Pride season a member of the lgbt community is telling another in that community that they shouldn’t fight for something they believe in and accept the status quo for the happiness of others. To not rock the boat. Errr okay , forgive me while I quietly shake my head and weap in the corner. And as for how do we police it…. for real ? All we’re talking about is having other options to help people express their authentic selves, no ones talking about identity theft here. Nothing at present stops a man creating a female profile and you’re concerned about someone misrepresenting where the fall on the trans spectrum? Another argument I saw was about the “hierarchy” of transness. No one here is suggesting that any one section of the spectrum is more valid or worthwhile or better than any other, just that there are inherent differences in what it means when meeting sexually for each of us. Once again I ask how can it possibly be bad to have more options to allow people to express themselves fully ? " Quit your whining. Ultra Tedious | |||
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"Quit your whining. Ultra Tedious" So trans rights and trying to accommodate the feelings and experiences of everyone on the spectrum is tedious ? What a forward thinking response | |||
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"Hi Forumers, Would you think that the separation of TV (crossdresser) and TS (transsexual) categories is a good idea? Currently there is one category TV/TS, but there is a considerable difference between those who have or are transitioning to another gender and people who crossdress. " So let’s cut to the chase... there are now over 20 terms to describe the many and varied people making up the trans spectrum. Yes 20+ Nevermind your dilemma... what does a women who identifies as a man do on fab? Add to this fact that actually the majority of these terms govern a state of mind, not a physical change etc. So, What is this split for? Some kind of elitist bollox by people not wishing to bundled with to quote a number of girls views “HPW’s” despite the fact that inevitably that’s exactly the stage those same girls will have travelled in the past. If you split out TS... are we going to further split them part time/full time, are we going to separate out HRT, Pre op, post op. As people further transition will we shift them up and down groupings? I like women and men... not all but in general a number of each sex. I don’t need categories of prettiness, skin tone, weight, boob job, no boob job etc to make my choices... I look at them all and message or wink the ones I personally like, seeing ones that aren’t for me does not cause any mortal offence. What’s the issue with those browsing tv/ts from doing exactly the same? My hint... if you don’t feel your profile properly represents you... re-write the fucker. There’s a massive text box to get all your character and sexual identity across so use it. Trans people in general need to spend less fucking time demanding rights and a bit more effort integrating and finding acceptance through demonstration of our worth. It’s no co-incidence Trans is the last taboo when we sit and feel outraged by this type of nothing to be honest. | |||
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", after all I often see a hairy bloke in his wife's knickers claiming to be a TV." What kind of cockend statement is that? That person who you without any thought rubbish is a member of the trans community. That person could in 10 years time be living as a full time woman, you have zero right to speak down to them. I’ve lived this life for nearly 30 years, in the early 90’s I was beaten up, on one occasion stabbed, I was arrested twice whilst the police tried to fabricate charges as is was under 21 the then age of consent for gay sex. Throughout that time I attended Pride, not a glorious flag waving celebration but the “listen to us, give us our rights” protest. I can’t describe how sad it is after living through that age to see what a so called ‘sister’ does with the greater acceptance she now enjoys through others efforts... you chose to judge and be hateful, seriously you really should be fucking ashamed. | |||
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"Put simply, the request needs to be put to a vote." A democratic solution... I here that... " I'd personally recommend all those trans girls who are in some form of transition, to ID as female on here. Kills the topic overnight" Totally... " At times, we need to listen to the trans community and heed their views. If a splitting is required, it should be made that way" Absolutely... "Lets not forget who pays for this site. " Men.... Ps. Love what you do xx | |||
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"I think we T girls should be grateful to be even on the fringes of FAB classification. FAB after all is primarily for swinging couples, not single men, gay men, t-girls, etc ... couples! T-girls do pretty well thank you very much, so I say dont rock the boat x" I don’t think it’s just for couples. If singles weren’t meant to be here then we wouldn’t be able to be here. I don’t think T Girls need to be grateful, you should feel as welcome here as anyone. You definitely don’t need to keep quiet. | |||
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"Why should anyone be labelled were all here for the same thing. " It’s make it quite difficult to find what you’re looking for is there weren’t any categories at all. | |||
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"Quit your whining. Ultra Tedious So trans rights and trying to accommodate the feelings and experiences of everyone on the spectrum is tedious ? What a forward thinking response " Yes. Because the spectrum is never ending. Boring frankly. It's fine as it is. Explain to the guys as you chat your ts What's the big problem? | |||
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" I'd like to see Male, Female and Non-Binary as gender options, with an additional, optional tick box for TS, TV and CD to show the general personal preference. This sort of approach is used on modelling and escort sites and seems to work well. How would everyone feel about that?" That is a very good idea actually. | |||
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"I think we T girls should be grateful to be even on the fringes of FAB classification. FAB after all is primarily for swinging couples, not single men, gay men, t-girls, etc ... couples! T-girls do pretty well thank you very much, so I say dont rock the boat x" Exactly! | |||
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" I'd like to see Male, Female and Non-Binary as gender options, with an additional, optional tick box for TS, TV and CD to show the general personal preference. This sort of approach is used on modelling and escort sites and seems to work well. How would everyone feel about that? That is a very good idea actually." Non Binary THuman here. Hi. It’s a tricky thing. Putting yourself in a box. There probably needs to be a few more boxes but you’ll never please everyone. I know those who identify as men and call themselves HPWs. Now you can’t put them in a box with those who think of themselves as male CDs because there’s a huge difference. The TV box is also very generic. And problematic. Personally I don’t like it. ‘Tranny’ is associated and has been used at me in mostly derogatory ways on many occasions. Some even violent ones. And so I like TGirl or the non binary version THuman. It’s complicated. Ultimately I don’t want to be in a box. I hope my profile and how I communicate, gets across who I am and there’s no worry about boxes! I hope everyone is well and looking forward to life after Covid. | |||
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"I know this is has been an ongoing debate on here but yes I think they should be separated. As the OP says, there's a big difference between TV and TS. There's no reason why Fab shouldn't separate them x Issue is how do you police it? A guy cant say there a woman on here or they get banned correct? So wouldnt it be the same if i was to put myself in the TS catagory? I look in reality no different to a pre op TS... Will fab start asking for proof of your goverment issued gender, like a driving lisence? I think alot of you seem to fall for the typical Tranny Tiers that seems to be about, were TS's look down on TV's. It's well known within the community. My guess is alot of TV's see threads like this and feel its the same shit as that " Here lies the admin problem, Asking for such proof could be unlawful under the EA 2010 so it just ought to engage with the trans community and garner a view that we as patrons, request | |||
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"Don't most pre op and post op trans girls change Thier category to woman on here anyway ? So trying to find those people is even more difficult than if tvts Just saying " Yes. Exactly. | |||
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"I'd like this too. I was winked by a TV/TS. When I referred to her in a message as a TV, she was most indignant. Received a terse message and not heard more since. Separate categories would eliminate this kind of faux-pas." did you read her profile before writing her msg ? | |||
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"I think we T girls should be grateful to be even on the fringes of FAB classification. FAB after all is primarily for swinging couples, not single men, gay men, t-girls, etc ... couples! T-girls do pretty well thank you very much, so I say dont rock the boat x I don’t think it’s just for couples. If singles weren’t meant to be here then we wouldn’t be able to be here. I don’t think T Girls need to be grateful, you should feel as welcome here as anyone. You definitely don’t need to keep quiet. " Swinging IS by definition for couples.. and of | |||
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"As others state, it has been discussed in extensive depth ad nauseum since Fab started. It should only be a matter for those within the legally protected characteristic to concern themselves with. Not for the convenience of others etc. When you have reviewed and accepted the valid points from the hundreds of posts about this of the last decade, then try finding something new to add to it. The current system is the correct one and prevents the unnecessary pressure on people to self-disclose what are highly personal, frequently upsetting and intrusive personal details, to the world. That is more than enough to keep the status quo. As an individual, you have the freedom to provide others with whatever personal information that you wish to. But you should not expect that you can impose what is your wish on to others as a very demanding and troubling outing of people, who may not share your excessive expectations of themselves in a fully public arena. For the conversation of others, it is absolutely not a consideration that should be thought about. Do what is right for you. " Well said! | |||
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"I find it strange that on most other websites people are free to call themselves Trans, Gender Fluid, Non Binary etc, yet here having more choice is a problem? The key word here is choice. I'm cisgendered so I'm avoiding speaking on the behalf of anyone who has/is transitioning... But what's wrong with more choice so we can better describe who we are? " Cos it's BOLLOX. Like the tedious term "cisgendered' hardly anyone uses. Stop the incessant labeling. | |||
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"Why should anyone be labelled were all here for the same thing. It’s make it quite difficult to find what you’re looking for is there weren’t any categories at all. " I think labels are important as they help you understand and come to terms with yourself, rather than keeping you in a state of confusion or delusion. Also by hiding who or what you truly are, whatever your gender/ sexuality etc, you are taking away the free choice of others who have a right to preferences in who they have sex with. | |||
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"Cos it's BOLLOX. Like the tedious term "cisgendered' hardly anyone uses. Stop the incessant labeling." It's not a tedious term. I was born male and I identify as a man. There are people who don't identify as the biological sex they were born as, so what's wrong with having an option for them that allows them to better describe themself (if they wish)? We're all different and we should acknowledge and celebrate that. This doesn't cause division anywhere else, so why is it different on fab? | |||
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"Hi Forumers, Would you think that the separation of TV (crossdresser) and TS (transsexual) categories is a good idea? Currently there is one category TV/TS, but there is a considerable difference between those who have or are transitioning to another gender and people who crossdress. " Then again do we need to separate into pre-op and post-op? | |||
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"It's been said before that transsexuals identify as women so why people can't just read profiles is beyond me." exactly so I don't see what all the fuss is about | |||
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"It's been said before that transsexuals identify as women so why people can't just read profiles is beyond me." This is your opinion, it might be right, or it might be wrong. Certainly I would prefer that people decide for themselves how that want to identify. And not conform to other's opinion of who they should be. | |||
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"It's been said before that transsexuals identify as women so why people can't just read profiles is beyond me. This is your opinion, it might be right, or it might be wrong. Certainly I would prefer that people decide for themselves how that want to identify. And not conform to other's opinion of who they should be. " I totally agree with the sentiment here, however as the majority of people here are here to meet others, and your profile is essentially an advert, being able to be found easily by those you want to meet is probably the number one aim. Having lots of choice and being to identify as you wish is great, but will that make it easier for people to find you? I agree the current, broad idea of lumping everyone who doesn't identify as cisgender into one category is restrictive. But how granular should we go, while keeping it simple enough for everyone who uses the site to understand? | |||
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