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"I went to a BBW night at Chams in the past and had no issues but a woman there who is slim said she had some rude comments. We would like to go and admire BBW women but want no stress. I recently saw a thread on here from a lady complaining about slim women at these events. What do people think? Surely all club nights should be inclusive as we are members. " I'm fairly sure that I know the situation you're talking about and I think the rude lady was spoken to by the club staff. The bbw nights are for larger ladies and their admirers, whoever complained on here about it needs to look at what the night is actually for. Go along, ignore the miserable people and enjoy yourself, you're as entitled to be there as the bbw's. | |||
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"I have found the customers at these events can be far from the normal type of clientele you would normally expect in a club. It has been obvious that they got in on a guest list and were not paid up members who value their membership ! With a lack of manners and etiquette from both males and females. Whilst I accept that a bbw event is just that a club should still cater for its bread and butter members. " I love larger women, my partner is a big woman so you'd think we'd love bbw nights? But we don't like them, for a lot for the reasons you state. We find there often is a real lack of respect by some of the visitors for women, for etiquette and for the facilities. Men who just think they can help themselves and just throw used condoms anywhere. Seen a pair of young girls throwing beer can into dungeon and heckling at the people playing in there. We are often at it till the end and we never see the club in such as state as it is at the end of bbw night. We been to 2 (2nd by accident as we didn't realise, just fancied sunday in the club). I'm really not sure if we'd go again because there is just so much disrespect. Which is a real shame because of course the majority of people there are great. And to be fair there is always a great selection of all shapes and sizes on a normal club night so we don't need bbw night. | |||
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"I know some bigger girls who are self conscious dressing down if there are slim women at a party, which is why they go to the BBW events. But you can’t impose a size/weight criteria can you? How would that work?! ‘Sorry you’re too slim, you can’t come in’. People have to be more realistic. People can go to whichever party they like. " I’m quite surprised women would feel self conscious at events such as these, where the purpose is surely to celebrate women of a larger size who feel proud and confident? That was my assumption anyways, perhaps I’m wrong ... | |||
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"I have found the customers at these events can be far from the normal type of clientele you would normally expect in a club. It has been obvious that they got in on a guest list and were not paid up members who value their membership ! With a lack of manners and etiquette from both males and females. Whilst I accept that a bbw event is just that a club should still cater for its bread and butter members. " We love Chams but I won't go to bbw events for this reason. Had some not so pleasant experiences with non-members behaving like they're in a brothel. | |||
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"I know some bigger girls who are self conscious dressing down if there are slim women at a party, which is why they go to the BBW events. But you can’t impose a size/weight criteria can you? How would that work?! ‘Sorry you’re too slim, you can’t come in’. People have to be more realistic. People can go to whichever party they like. I’m quite surprised women would feel self conscious at events such as these, where the purpose is surely to celebrate women of a larger size who feel proud and confident? That was my assumption anyways, perhaps I’m wrong ... " Maybe I didn’t word it well. What I meant is that some bigger girls seek out these events as they feel uncomfortable at others. If then the BBW nights are still full of slim/thin ladies then some don’t like it. Comparison is a big thing for some people I think. | |||
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"I know some bigger girls who are self conscious dressing down if there are slim women at a party, which is why they go to the BBW events. But you can’t impose a size/weight criteria can you? How would that work?! ‘Sorry you’re too slim, you can’t come in’. People have to be more realistic. People can go to whichever party they like. I’m quite surprised women would feel self conscious at events such as these, where the purpose is surely to celebrate women of a larger size who feel proud and confident? That was my assumption anyways, perhaps I’m wrong ... Maybe I didn’t word it well. What I meant is that some bigger girls seek out these events as they feel uncomfortable at others. If then the BBW nights are still full of slim/thin ladies then some don’t like it. Comparison is a big thing for some people I think. " Ahh ok, yes makes sense | |||
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"We did go and everyone was friendly. There were women of all sizes " Glad you had a good time. Fingers crossed the problems from the past have all be sorted out. It is a cracking club and should be enjoyed by all irrespective of a themed evening. | |||
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"Perhaps body image isn't always accurate?" Using FAB's definitions, if a Bulgarian women's shot-putter is an athlete, is that what's meant in these definitions? And if someone says that Angelina Jolie has a fabulous figure, is that what's meant here? FAB needs a new scale of sizes, that include men as well as women. Then at least there'll be one standard that everyone can refer to, and not just leave it to the immagination. | |||
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"[Removed by poster at 28/10/19 19:27:10]" are you saying im not normal clientele in a club and rude and and bad mannered. I am a bbw by the way.. .. And what do you define as clubs bread and butter?????? | |||
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"It's an illustration of the very real assumption that it's OK to body shame and exclude slim women" Exactly! It's been going on here for years, it seems that slim women are fair game, and I will admit it pisses me off, but what can you do? | |||
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"I know some bigger girls who are self conscious dressing down if there are slim women at a party, which is why they go to the BBW events. But you can’t impose a size/weight criteria can you? How would that work?! ‘Sorry you’re too slim, you can’t come in’. People have to be more realistic. People can go to whichever party they like. Well said I’m quite surprised women would feel self conscious at events such as these, where the purpose is surely to celebrate women of a larger size who feel proud and confident? That was my assumption anyways, perhaps I’m wrong ... Maybe I didn’t word it well. What I meant is that some bigger girls seek out these events as they feel uncomfortable at others. If then the BBW nights are still full of slim/thin ladies then some don’t like it. Comparison is a big thing for some people I think. " | |||
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"Personally we'd not have a problem, as long as they are there to swing and not just stand the the corner and chat. Definitely no need to be rude though. But I kinda get it as a bbw I'd not go to a slim night. As a non kinkster I'd not go to a BDSM night. Agree with this I wasn't BI I'd not go to a BI night." | |||
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"[Removed by poster at 28/10/19 19:27:10] are you saying im not normal clientele in a club and rude and and bad mannered. I am a bbw by the way.. .. And what do you define as clubs bread and butter?????? " By normal clientele I mean people who enjoy the swinging lifestyle . A club should be just that a place where people of all shapes, sizes and orientation can meet to have fun while showing others the respect and manners they deserve. If a club has a specialist night then all the better and is a great way to promote all aspects of the lifestyle. My point (and that raised by others in the thread) was that an open event can attract people who do not share the lifestyle and just see it as was put by others as a cheap brothel. By bread and butter I meant the above respectful members who show respect and understanding to others. | |||
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"Jealousy can often result in abuse which is not really acceptable. " Jealousy in what sense? | |||
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"Personally we'd not have a problem, as long as they are there to swing and not just stand the the corner and chat. Definitely no need to be rude though. But I kinda get it as a bbw I'd not go to a slim night. As a non kinkster I'd not go to a BDSM night. I wasn't BI I'd not go to a BI night." TBH neither would I, I would only attend somewhere where I felt included | |||
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"The bbw (Big Beautiful women) nights can be a good thing as Scarlett would confirm herself she has suffered a few issues that were guys/girls who have made comment about her size and shape. The lady who made the comment has merely said what was on a lot of people’s minds as we have said that no one should be made to feel uncomfortable or excluded from an event, however if ladies who feel “body confident” for none bbw (Big Beautiful women) nights then they should be helping the people who go to BBW nights that they attend. On a plus note we are glad that you _otcouple65 had a good night all in all Hunter xx" 100% | |||
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"No not at all, the comment was made and last night there was a flurry of conversation about “slim” women who go to BBW nights ( Big Beautiful Women) 1, You are too big to be at this event to one beautiful lady, (the lady in question was a PLUS size or BBW) 2, We only come to have a giggle at the fatties. Was a comment over heard by another plus size lady or BBW. 3, I have been mad to feel ashamed of my body at the event by slim ladies and their friends was said by another larger sized guy. We are meant to be adults this is an adult environment but certain people who at these nights act like school bullies. It is never right to body shame anyone what ever their shape!!! " I was the lady that made the first comment I was at chams bbw over a year ago and 2 men were laughing at me, nudging each other and staring at me. They told me I was too fat to be there. I said I’m a bbw and what did they think a bbw was. They pointed to a woman who was around a size 12/14 and said she was a bbw I was gobsmacked I’ve attended another private bbw party and was called a ‘whale’ by a very very slender lady - I left the party, got in my car and cried most of the way home. I stopped going out to clubs/parties for a while. I have been excluded from a few clubs and parties due to being a bbw. So a couple have set up a private party that caters for size 18+ ladies only which frankly I rejoice at. I’ve been and felt so comfortable knowing I wasn’t being judged for my size. The lady accused of causing trouble last year was made a scapegoat for another woman’s poisonous attitude. I’m not sure why she was brought up being it was a year ago either????? If you’re a regular member at Chams then surely you see the events board and/or on the website/app? The issues surrounding condoms etc; ANY large party has these issues. Regular club nights it’s different but large parties mean overflowing bins and lots of people A lot of these are non swingers or just have no etiquette ! On a different post there was a comment stating that most of slim ladies that go the bbw party are going for their chocolate fix Something they can get at a lot of other places and parties that are meant for all sizes. After all certain parties have specific criteria which has to be adhered to to attend Bi night at VA you HAVE to have that you’re bi or bi curious on your fab profile to go. | |||
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"Well I’m not going to lie, I attended having travelled from Sussex and can honestly say I felt like I had attended a normal club night. Obviously I’d seen the original comments on the thread, up to the build up of the event and this certainly made me more aware of who was around me. That thread made me pay attention more last night and I’ll be honest I didn’t feel like I was at a BBW event x" Are you talking about last night at Chams? | |||
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"I was the one that commented on the event thread. My intention was not to body shame in the slightest. I wouldn't want it done to myself so wouldn't do it to someone else. My "opinion" which I was entitled to share was that there were people putting their names down who were of the svelter nature who weren't coming to appreciate the more voluptuous nature as their profile clearly says straight and only meets black men. The event is being treated as an interracial event when there are already plenty of them! There were other people who expressed there opinions too about how they feel uncomfortable at an event they once did. Yet my comment has been the only one jumped on!!!" To be fair snow, yours was the original comment. I don't feel that it was 'jumped' on but as the organiser I felt I had to respond. I was perfectly polite and have had s few personal responses thanking me for it. No one has said you are not entitled to your opinion but equally you can't expect that opinion to go unchallenged, especially when aired so publically. | |||
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"Well I’m not going to lie, I attended having travelled from Sussex and can honestly say I felt like I had attended a normal club night. Obviously I’d seen the original comments on the thread, up to the build up of the event and this certainly made me more aware of who was around me. That thread made me pay attention more last night and I’ll be honest I didn’t feel like I was at a BBW event x" Well said hun xx | |||
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"I was the one that commented on the event thread. My intention was not to body shame in the slightest. I wouldn't want it done to myself so wouldn't do it to someone else. My "opinion" which I was entitled to share was that there were people putting their names down who were of the svelter nature who weren't coming to appreciate the more voluptuous nature as their profile clearly says straight and only meets black men. The event is being treated as an interracial event when there are already plenty of them! There were other people who expressed there opinions too about how they feel uncomfortable at an event they once did. Yet my comment has been the only one jumped on!!! To be fair snow, yours was the original comment. I don't feel that it was 'jumped' on but as the organiser I felt I had to respond. I was perfectly polite and have had s few personal responses thanking me for it. No one has said you are not entitled to your opinion but equally you can't expect that opinion to go unchallenged, especially when aired so publically. " Hun the even you organise is wonderful it’s just a shame some guests just attend for the wrong reasons hun xx | |||
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"So a slim girl attends an event for bigger girls and one bigger girl doesn't like it. If there was a white guy at a BBC event would I be unhappy? In short no. I think it would be a bit unusual. Would I feel he shouldn't be there? No. Its his choice and his choice is absolutely nothing to do with me. Would I be concerned that he was a better lover than me? No because I would be way too busy doing my thing to worry about his thing. I understand how some big beautiful women would be uncomfortable. But that would only be because they forgot who or what they are BBW. So I'm just going to remind those of you who have forgotten. Your big beautiful women!!! Cuddly, charming and full of character. In my most humble opinion. This is a big fuss over a nothing There ends the matter. Play nice people. " I think if you read it it wasn't just one bigger girl | |||
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"I know some bigger girls who are self conscious dressing down if there are slim women at a party, which is why they go to the BBW events. But you can’t impose a size/weight criteria can you? How would that work?! ‘Sorry you’re too slim, you can’t come in’. People have to be more realistic. People can go to whichever party they like. " Well clubs do it the other way round! I'm not saying it's right but it happens to us larger ladies all the time. | |||
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"I have found the customers at these events can be far from the normal type of clientele you would normally expect in a club. It has been obvious that they got in on a guest list and were not paid up members who value their membership ! With a lack of manners and etiquette from both males and females. Whilst I accept that a bbw event is just that a club should still cater for its bread and butter members. I love larger women, my partner is a big woman so you'd think we'd love bbw nights? But we don't like them, for a lot for the reasons you state. We find there often is a real lack of respect by some of the visitors for women, for etiquette and for the facilities. Men who just think they can help themselves and just throw used condoms anywhere. Seen a pair of young girls throwing beer can into dungeon and heckling at the people playing in there. We are often at it till the end and we never see the club in such as state as it is at the end of bbw night. We been to 2 (2nd by accident as we didn't realise, just fancied sunday in the club). I'm really not sure if we'd go again because there is just so much disrespect. Which is a real shame because of course the majority of people there are great. And to be fair there is always a great selection of all shapes and sizes on a normal club night so we don't need bbw night." I'm exactly the same obviously you guys have met me at the attic so know I'm a big girl but I only ventured once to the BBW night at chams. It was not my cup of tea at all. Guys (and girls) thought they could grab me without permission. Some girl was having bare sex in the hot tub with lots of random guys and I felt so uncomfortable I have never been back. But as a BBW (hate that term) girl I would have no issue with slimmer ladies being there | |||
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"I know some bigger girls who are self conscious dressing down if there are slim women at a party, which is why they go to the BBW events. But you can’t impose a size/weight criteria can you? How would that work?! ‘Sorry you’re too slim, you can’t come in’. People have to be more realistic. People can go to whichever party they like. Well clubs do it the other way round! I'm not saying it's right but it happens to us larger ladies all the time. " I’m a big girl too and I’ve never been refused entry anywhere. But I would be horrified if it happened. | |||
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"Can I ask if any of those who have had issues with comments from guests ever raised it with the staff or me? This is the first I've ever heard of these problems and I honestly feel like they are being made to discredit the event. The cynic in me wonders if it's to boost interest in events that set entry criteria but I'd like to think I'm wrong on that. I was much more alert to the size of guests at the club last night and perhaps I was looking in the wrong places but I have to say it's like we were at 2 different clubs. I would say there was a handful of 'slim' people in my opinion. Like I said in the reply on the guest list thread. We don't have sole use of the club, we never have. I remember attending one before I took over the running of them and saw a man looking lost at the bar. I asked if he knew it was a BBW night, he said no and he didn't really like BBW nights....told he'd shit out then hadn't he! I really do hope we can move on from all of this. I hadn't planned on commenting further after my reply on the guest list thread but I couldn't let some of these comments go unanswered. I have no intention of setting entry criteria for the BBW nights. I'm sorry if that disappoints some of you. But I will ask that if you do experience any nastiness you report it to me or to the club or ideally both. There is nothing j can do about something that happened a year ago which is only being bought up now. I'm not saying there's much I can do anyway but I will try. " I was off alone at one point and Scarlett had an issue at the bus stop! She has just told me and wouldn’t tell me at the event as she knows how I’d react. However my own body view of myself is I don’t give a fuck if you don’t like what you see then look the other fucking way, and if you find it funny then good on you but I’m good the way I am ta ( that’s the way I think as I walk around lol) But your event has helped Scarlett no end xx | |||
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"I have found the customers at these events can be far from the normal type of clientele you would normally expect in a club. It has been obvious that they got in on a guest list and were not paid up members who value their membership ! With a lack of manners and etiquette from both males and females. Whilst I accept that a bbw event is just that a club should still cater for its bread and butter members. I love larger women, my partner is a big woman so you'd think we'd love bbw nights? But we don't like them, for a lot for the reasons you state. We find there often is a real lack of respect by some of the visitors for women, for etiquette and for the facilities. Men who just think they can help themselves and just throw used condoms anywhere. Seen a pair of young girls throwing beer can into dungeon and heckling at the people playing in there. We are often at it till the end and we never see the club in such as state as it is at the end of bbw night. We been to 2 (2nd by accident as we didn't realise, just fancied sunday in the club). I'm really not sure if we'd go again because there is just so much disrespect. Which is a real shame because of course the majority of people there are great. And to be fair there is always a great selection of all shapes and sizes on a normal club night so we don't need bbw night. I'm exactly the same obviously you guys have met me at the attic so know I'm a big girl but I only ventured once to the BBW night at chams. It was not my cup of tea at all. Guys (and girls) thought they could grab me without permission. Some girl was having bare sex in the hot tub with lots of random guys and I felt so uncomfortable I have never been back. But as a BBW (hate that term) girl I would have no issue with slimmer ladies being there " I agree people shouldn't be grabbing anyone without consent. But the bare in the hot tub thing you can find anywhere. I've seen it happen in many clubs | |||
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" I agree people shouldn't be grabbing anyone without consent. But the bare in the hot tub thing you can find anywhere. I've seen it happen in many clubs " | |||
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"I know some bigger girls who are self conscious dressing down if there are slim women at a party, which is why they go to the BBW events. But you can’t impose a size/weight criteria can you? How would that work?! ‘Sorry you’re too slim, you can’t come in’. People have to be more realistic. People can go to whichever party they like. Well clubs do it the other way round! I'm not saying it's right but it happens to us larger ladies all the time. I’m a big girl too and I’ve never been refused entry anywhere. But I would be horrified if it happened. " La boudoir won't except larger women. Iv been told my a couple in a club once that I would be pretty if I was thinner. | |||
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"I know some bigger girls who are self conscious dressing down if there are slim women at a party, which is why they go to the BBW events. But you can’t impose a size/weight criteria can you? How would that work?! ‘Sorry you’re too slim, you can’t come in’. People have to be more realistic. People can go to whichever party they like. Well clubs do it the other way round! I'm not saying it's right but it happens to us larger ladies all the time. I’m a big girl too and I’ve never been refused entry anywhere. But I would be horrified if it happened. La boudoir won't except larger women. Iv been told my a couple in a club once that I would be pretty if I was thinner. " My mum tells me that all the time. | |||
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"I know some bigger girls who are self conscious dressing down if there are slim women at a party, which is why they go to the BBW events. But you can’t impose a size/weight criteria can you? How would that work?! ‘Sorry you’re too slim, you can’t come in’. People have to be more realistic. People can go to whichever party they like. Well clubs do it the other way round! I'm not saying it's right but it happens to us larger ladies all the time. I’m a big girl too and I’ve never been refused entry anywhere. But I would be horrified if it happened. La boudoir won't except larger women. Iv been told my a couple in a club once that I would be pretty if I was thinner. My mum tells me that all the time. " My Mum too. | |||
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"I went to a BBW night at Chams in the past and had no issues but a woman there who is slim said she had some rude comments. We would like to go and admire BBW women but want no stress. I recently saw a thread on here from a lady complaining about slim women at these events. What do people think? Surely all club nights should be inclusive as we are members. I'm fairly sure that I know the situation you're talking about and I think the rude lady was spoken to by the club staff. The bbw nights are for larger ladies and their admirers, whoever complained on here about it needs to look at what the night is actually for. Go along, ignore the miserable people and enjoy yourself, you're as entitled to be there as the bbw's. " I've been to a few of these nights in the past with various lady friends of varying sizes and shapes. I'm not sure at what point a lady graduates from curvy to b.b.w? It's a shame when anyone is negative in any public event and fortunately have never come across it. Follow others advice and ignore them and carry on enjoying whatever positive things happen, It's usually such a friendly atmosphere. ?? | |||
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"I went to a BBW night at Chams in the past and had no issues but a woman there who is slim said she had some rude comments. We would like to go and admire BBW women but want no stress. I recently saw a thread on here from a lady complaining about slim women at these events. What do people think? Surely all club nights should be inclusive as we are members. I'm fairly sure that I know the situation you're talking about and I think the rude lady was spoken to by the club staff. The bbw nights are for larger ladies and their admirers, whoever complained on here about it needs to look at what the night is actually for. Go along, ignore the miserable people and enjoy yourself, you're as entitled to be there as the bbw's. I've been to a few of these nights in the past with various lady friends of varying sizes and shapes. I'm not sure at what point a lady graduates from curvy to b.b.w? It's a shame when anyone is negative in any public event and fortunately have never come across it. Follow others advice and ignore them and carry on enjoying whatever positive things happen, It's usually such a friendly atmosphere. ??" She goes not. She can be big but not curvy, or curvy but not fat. | |||
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"So a slim girl attends an event for bigger girls and one bigger girl doesn't like it. If there was a white guy at a BBC event would I be unhappy? In short no. I think it would be a bit unusual. Would I feel he shouldn't be there? No. Its his choice and his choice is absolutely nothing to do with me. Would I be concerned that he was a better lover than me? No because I would be way too busy doing my thing to worry about his thing. I understand how some big beautiful women would be uncomfortable. But that would only be because they forgot who or what they are BBW. So I'm just going to remind those of you who have forgotten. Your big beautiful women!!! Cuddly, charming and full of character. In my most humble opinion. This is a big fuss over a nothing There ends the matter. Play nice people. " White guys do go to events mostly aimed at black men. So do Asian guys. | |||
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"I’ve been rejected from a few private parties and a particular club in London All stated that I am an unsuitable size, one went further to say I was also too old. I’m 51 . Didn’t think I was last it lol. " And we all know the name of that club. | |||
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"I’ve been rejected from a few private parties and a particular club in London All stated that I am an unsuitable size, one went further to say I was also too old. I’m 51 . Didn’t think I was last it lol. " This is my point, people don't seem to have an issue not letting larger people in but the minute you say it's for larger people everyone gets all bent out shape. | |||
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"I’ve been rejected from a few private parties and a particular club in London All stated that I am an unsuitable size, one went further to say I was also too old. I’m 51 . Didn’t think I was last it lol. This is my point, people don't seem to have an issue not letting larger people in but the minute you say it's for larger people everyone gets all bent out shape. " People do have a problem. Search killing kittens or le boudoir threads on here and you'll see a lot of people saying how they don't approve | |||
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"I’ve been rejected from a few private parties and a particular club in London All stated that I am an unsuitable size, one went further to say I was also too old. I’m 51 . Didn’t think I was last it lol. This is my point, people don't seem to have an issue not letting larger people in but the minute you say it's for larger people everyone gets all bent out shape. People do have a problem. Search killing kittens or le boudoir threads on here and you'll see a lot of people saying how they don't approve " Yes some don't, but many do. | |||
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"I know some bigger girls who are self conscious dressing down if there are slim women at a party, which is why they go to the BBW events. But you can’t impose a size/weight criteria can you? How would that work?! ‘Sorry you’re too slim, you can’t come in’. People have to be more realistic. People can go to whichever party they like. Well clubs do it the other way round! I'm not saying it's right but it happens to us larger ladies all the time. I’m a big girl too and I’ve never been refused entry anywhere. But I would be horrified if it happened. La boudoir won't except larger women. Iv been told my a couple in a club once that I would be pretty if I was thinner. " I'm a larger girl and we are members at le boudoir. | |||
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"There’s no need to be rude but as a BBW I’d probably be upset by straight slim women attending but I’d never be rude about it or say anything.." What is the problem with being straight? | |||
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"I have found the customers at these events can be far from the normal type of clientele you would normally expect in a club. It has been obvious that they got in on a guest list and were not paid up members who value their membership ! With a lack of manners and etiquette from both males and females. Whilst I accept that a bbw event is just that a club should still cater for its bread and butter members. " men? | |||
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"There’s no need to be rude but as a BBW I’d probably be upset by straight slim women attending but I’d never be rude about it or say anything.." Upset? What’s there to be upset about? | |||
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"There’s no need to be rude but as a BBW I’d probably be upset by straight slim women attending but I’d never be rude about it or say anything.. What is the problem with being straight?" Guessing it's cause they aren't there to appreciate the bigger women just play with the men. I could be wrong tho | |||
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"There’s no need to be rude but as a BBW I’d probably be upset by straight slim women attending but I’d never be rude about it or say anything.. Upset? What’s there to be upset about? " Additionally, like some BBWs I’d feel additionally self conscious about my appearance | |||
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"We have found that BBW parties attract more black men than white - this then attracts ‘all white’ couples because they want a black bull for the wife/gf. There are plenty of interracial parties for all sizes. 99% of these slim ladies are NOT there to admire/play with BBWs. There are plenty of parties that don’t let me in because I’m a BBW so give us a break " So surely the problem is the black men who play with the slim ladies at BBW parties? | |||
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"We have found that BBW parties attract more black men than white - this then attracts ‘all white’ couples because they want a black bull for the wife/gf. There are plenty of interracial parties for all sizes. 99% of these slim ladies are NOT there to admire/play with BBWs. There are plenty of parties that don’t let me in because I’m a BBW so give us a break " Yes, but logically if that happens then these events attract more black men compared to white than regular nights BECAUSE more black men tend to prefer a large lady to a slimmer one? Therefore also logically the black men present are likely to prefer fun with the rounder lady over the slim one. So whilst the slim white ladies and their partners may not be BBW admirers then their presence won't really affect your potential playmate possibilities anyway as the black men present would choose fun with yourself over the slim lady? So I can't see why that would cause you any issue whatsoever. B | |||
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"We have found that BBW parties attract more black men than white - this then attracts ‘all white’ couples because they want a black bull for the wife/gf. There are plenty of interracial parties for all sizes. 99% of these slim ladies are NOT there to admire/play with BBWs. There are plenty of parties that don’t let me in because I’m a BBW so give us a break So surely the problem is the black men who play with the slim ladies at BBW parties?" Evie do you think this whole issue is a problem? It seems somewhat blown out of proportion. | |||
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"Wow, great thread Here are the facts:- The majority of men are attracted to slim, tall women, it’s a fact and just look at nearly every rich or powerful man in the world, they have their pick of ladies and generally pick tall, slim ladies. The reality is for a slim tall girl attending a BBW night is that the MAJORITY of men will want to play with her rather than a BBW, hence many BBW’s not liking slim tall girls at BBW events, that is what this whole thread boils down to. I’m a short arse btw....." I totally disagree with this.. see my post above. I last year had got my weight right down.. and at BBW bash found that I struggled to get attention as a slimmer girl there. At BBW events I'm Not sure normal rules apply | |||
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"Wow, great thread Here are the facts:- The majority of men are attracted to slim, tall women, it’s a fact and just look at nearly every rich or powerful man in the world, they have their pick of ladies and generally pick tall, slim ladies. The reality is for a slim tall girl attending a BBW night is that the MAJORITY of men will want to play with her rather than a BBW, hence many BBW’s not liking slim tall girls at BBW events, that is what this whole thread boils down to. I’m a short arse btw.....I totally disagree with this.. see my post above. I last year had got my weight right down.. and at BBW bash found that I struggled to get attention as a slimmer girl there. At BBW events I'm Not sure normal rules apply" At 5ft 3 you are not tall, just going on our own club experiences xx | |||
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"I went to a BBW night at Chams in the past and had no issues but a woman there who is slim said she had some rude comments. We would like to go and admire BBW women but want no stress. I recently saw a thread on here from a lady complaining about slim women at these events. What do people think? Surely all club nights should be inclusive as we are members. " Go and admire them for the glories godetias they are | |||
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"I know some bigger girls who are self conscious dressing down if there are slim women at a party, which is why they go to the BBW events. But you can’t impose a size/weight criteria can you? How would that work?! ‘Sorry you’re too slim, you can’t come in’. People have to be more realistic. People can go to whichever party they like. I’m quite surprised women would feel self conscious at events such as these, where the purpose is surely to celebrate women of a larger size who feel proud and confident? That was my assumption anyways, perhaps I’m wrong ... Maybe I didn’t word it well. What I meant is that some bigger girls seek out these events as they feel uncomfortable at others. If then the BBW nights are still full of slim/thin ladies then some don’t like it. Comparison is a big thing for some people I think. " I would feel self conscious in this situation. But since swinging I've realised i am some people's cup of tea. And from all your comments i just need to remember, if I'm ever in this club situation, that we BBWs are there to be admired. | |||
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"Wow, great thread Here are the facts:- The majority of men are attracted to slim, tall women, it’s a fact and just look at nearly every rich or powerful man in the world, they have their pick of ladies and generally pick tall, slim ladies. The reality is for a slim tall girl attending a BBW night is that the MAJORITY of men will want to play with her rather than a BBW, hence many BBW’s not liking slim tall girls at BBW events, that is what this whole thread boils down to. I’m a short arse btw....." With respect I think you are talking about rich men in the northern hemisphere. Those rich men in the northern hemisphere may not actually want items/women they find attractive but want those items/women that reinforce their status. Hence all those luxury items whose worth is based not upon attraction but exclusiveness. In the northern hemisphere tall slim women are seen as a status symbol, and that is different from being attracted to them for their innate sexiness. This ties in to the debate about having standards, where people's desires are tied to perceptions of status rather than sexiness or attraction. | |||
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"Wow, great thread Here are the facts:- The majority of men are attracted to slim, tall women, it’s a fact and just look at nearly every rich or powerful man in the world, they have their pick of ladies and generally pick tall, slim ladies. The reality is for a slim tall girl attending a BBW night is that the MAJORITY of men will want to play with her rather than a BBW, hence many BBW’s not liking slim tall girls at BBW events, that is what this whole thread boils down to. I’m a short arse btw....." I'd have to disagree with this to a point (and my OH whilst she is fairly slim out-shortarses you! ) as at BBW events the men who attend do so generally because they particularly love BBWs. If I went to a specific BBC event would I expect to play much? No, because the ladies that do attend tend to prefer black gentlemen and I'm white? But I don't go to those events anyway so it doesn't really matter. Likewise men who attend BBW events, unlike these rich and powerful people you allude to, go because they're fans of BBWs so I'd imagine like women at BBC events would turn down slim ladies to play with BBWs all night long? The only man who may prefer the more slender ladies would be a bloke who had mistakenly wandered in on the wrong night, who would be in a minority anyway? So I really can't understand why any BBWs should give a toss about slim ladies attending as on these nights they're the most desired ladies in there? B | |||
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"Wow, great thread Here are the facts:- The majority of men are attracted to slim, tall women, it’s a fact and just look at nearly every rich or powerful man in the world, they have their pick of ladies and generally pick tall, slim ladies. The reality is for a slim tall girl attending a BBW night is that the MAJORITY of men will want to play with her rather than a BBW, hence many BBW’s not liking slim tall girls at BBW events, that is what this whole thread boils down to. I’m a short arse btw..... With respect I think you are talking about rich men in the northern hemisphere. Those rich men in the northern hemisphere may not actually want items/women they find attractive but want those items/women that reinforce their status. Hence all those luxury items whose worth is based not upon attraction but exclusiveness. In the northern hemisphere tall slim women are seen as a status symbol, and that is different from being attracted to them for their innate sexiness. This ties in to the debate about having standards, where people's desires are tied to perceptions of status rather than sexiness or attraction. " I have lived in China, Korea , Thailand, Japan Vietnam, Sweden, London, Paris, Mexico City , and NYC..... I have yet to see any rich or famous person in the media without someone beautiful..... Now the only exceptions I have seen the standard of beauty change is in some African countries and the pacific islands.... But the universal standard of beauty..... symmetrical face , with high cheekbones still stand in 99.9% of the world..... | |||
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"Wow, great thread Here are the facts:- The majority of men are attracted to slim, tall women, it’s a fact and just look at nearly every rich or powerful man in the world, they have their pick of ladies and generally pick tall, slim ladies. The reality is for a slim tall girl attending a BBW night is that the MAJORITY of men will want to play with her rather than a BBW, hence many BBW’s not liking slim tall girls at BBW events, that is what this whole thread boils down to. I’m a short arse btw..... With respect I think you are talking about rich men in the northern hemisphere. Those rich men in the northern hemisphere may not actually want items/women they find attractive but want those items/women that reinforce their status. Hence all those luxury items whose worth is based not upon attraction but exclusiveness. In the northern hemisphere tall slim women are seen as a status symbol, and that is different from being attracted to them for their innate sexiness. This ties in to the debate about having standards, where people's desires are tied to perceptions of status rather than sexiness or attraction. I have lived in China, Korea , Thailand, Japan Vietnam, Sweden, London, Paris, Mexico City , and NYC..... I have yet to see any rich or famous person in the media without someone beautiful..... Now the only exceptions I have seen the standard of beauty change is in some African countries and the pacific islands.... But the universal standard of beauty..... symmetrical face , with high cheekbones still stand in 99.9% of the world..... " This will have more of an element of truth to it as facial symmetry has been well documented as appealing to more people. Though in the case of a BBW, they may possess higher cheekbones and have facial symmetry, so as such it wouldn't really affect the ones for whom it applied? B | |||
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"Wow, great thread Here are the facts:- The majority of men are attracted to slim, tall women, it’s a fact and just look at nearly every rich or powerful man in the world, they have their pick of ladies and generally pick tall, slim ladies. The reality is for a slim tall girl attending a BBW night is that the MAJORITY of men will want to play with her rather than a BBW, hence many BBW’s not liking slim tall girls at BBW events, that is what this whole thread boils down to. I’m a short arse btw..... With respect I think you are talking about rich men in the northern hemisphere. Those rich men in the northern hemisphere may not actually want items/women they find attractive but want those items/women that reinforce their status. Hence all those luxury items whose worth is based not upon attraction but exclusiveness. In the northern hemisphere tall slim women are seen as a status symbol, and that is different from being attracted to them for their innate sexiness. This ties in to the debate about having standards, where people's desires are tied to perceptions of status rather than sexiness or attraction. I have lived in China, Korea , Thailand, Japan Vietnam, Sweden, London, Paris, Mexico City , and NYC..... I have yet to see any rich or famous person in the media without someone beautiful..... Now the only exceptions I have seen the standard of beauty change is in some African countries and the pacific islands.... But the universal standard of beauty..... symmetrical face , with high cheekbones still stand in 99.9% of the world..... " What about wayne Rooney? | |||
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"Wow, great thread Here are the facts:- The majority of men are attracted to slim, tall women, it’s a fact and just look at nearly every rich or powerful man in the world, they have their pick of ladies and generally pick tall, slim ladies. The reality is for a slim tall girl attending a BBW night is that the MAJORITY of men will want to play with her rather than a BBW, hence many BBW’s not liking slim tall girls at BBW events, that is what this whole thread boils down to. I’m a short arse btw..... With respect I think you are talking about rich men in the northern hemisphere. Those rich men in the northern hemisphere may not actually want items/women they find attractive but want those items/women that reinforce their status. Hence all those luxury items whose worth is based not upon attraction but exclusiveness. In the northern hemisphere tall slim women are seen as a status symbol, and that is different from being attracted to them for their innate sexiness. This ties in to the debate about having standards, where people's desires are tied to perceptions of status rather than sexiness or attraction. I have lived in China, Korea , Thailand, Japan Vietnam, Sweden, London, Paris, Mexico City , and NYC..... I have yet to see any rich or famous person in the media without someone beautiful..... Now the only exceptions I have seen the standard of beauty change is in some African countries and the pacific islands.... But the universal standard of beauty..... symmetrical face , with high cheekbones still stand in 99.9% of the world..... This will have more of an element of truth to it as facial symmetry has been well documented as appealing to more people. Though in the case of a BBW, they may possess higher cheekbones and have facial symmetry, so as such it wouldn't really affect the ones for whom it applied? B" 100% ...... | |||
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"I went to a BBW night at Chams in the past and had no issues but a woman there who is slim said she had some rude comments. We would like to go and admire BBW women but want no stress. I recently saw a thread on here from a lady complaining about slim women at these events. What do people think? Surely all club nights should be inclusive as we are members. " I was there and heard the conversation too. Plus another lady who said that a few guys had said she was too big for the event I couldn't care less the shape and size of those who attend these events, however I do object those feel the need to comment on others Absolutely no need for it. | |||
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"Had a bad experience at a bi night in one club. Openly advertised as bi night but because chris was sucking another cock this offended one couple. Not been since " You dont get that problem at the Chameleons bi nights!! | |||
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"Wow, great thread Here are the facts:- The majority of men are attracted to slim, tall women, it’s a fact and just look at nearly every rich or powerful man in the world, they have their pick of ladies and generally pick tall, slim ladies. The reality is for a slim tall girl attending a BBW night is that the MAJORITY of men will want to play with her rather than a BBW, hence many BBW’s not liking slim tall girls at BBW events, that is what this whole thread boils down to. I’m a short arse btw....." You’re totally wrong. At a specific BBW event, the majority of men attending would be there for that reason, because they love Big Beautiful Women. They would therefore NOT prefer to play with the tall slim girl that you refer to. There are lots of men out there who actively look for bigger and more curvaceous women. Surely it’s about the whole package anyway? A face, a smile, sparkly eyes, a naughty laugh, a sexy clever funny personality ? Some tall, slim women have faces like a bag of spanners, as do some short, fat girls !!!! I agree that society as a whole might revere the typical model look, but believe me, I am the queen at a BBW event !!!!! | |||
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"Wow, great thread Here are the facts:- The majority of men are attracted to slim, tall women, it’s a fact and just look at nearly every rich or powerful man in the world, they have their pick of ladies and generally pick tall, slim ladies. The reality is for a slim tall girl attending a BBW night is that the MAJORITY of men will want to play with her rather than a BBW, hence many BBW’s not liking slim tall girls at BBW events, that is what this whole thread boils down to. I’m a short arse btw..... You’re totally wrong. At a specific BBW event, the majority of men attending would be there for that reason, because they love Big Beautiful Women. They would therefore NOT prefer to play with the tall slim girl that you refer to. There are lots of men out there who actively look for bigger and more curvaceous women. Surely it’s about the whole package anyway? A face, a smile, sparkly eyes, a naughty laugh, a sexy clever funny personality ? Some tall, slim women have faces like a bag of spanners, as do some short, fat girls !!!! I agree that society as a whole might revere the typical model look, but believe me, I am the queen at a BBW event !!!!! " Yes..... what this beautiful lady said | |||
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"I know some bigger girls who are self conscious dressing down if there are slim women at a party, which is why they go to the BBW events. But you can’t impose a size/weight criteria can you? How would that work?! ‘Sorry you’re too slim, you can’t come in’. People have to be more realistic. People can go to whichever party they like. I’m quite surprised women would feel self conscious at events such as these, where the purpose is surely to celebrate women of a larger size who feel proud and confident? That was my assumption anyways, perhaps I’m wrong ... Maybe I didn’t word it well. What I meant is that some bigger girls seek out these events as they feel uncomfortable at others. If then the BBW nights are still full of slim/thin ladies then some don’t like it. Comparison is a big thing for some people I think. I would feel self conscious in this situation. But since swinging I've realised i am some people's cup of tea. And from all your comments i just need to remember, if I'm ever in this club situation, that we BBWs are there to be admired. " I’m a big girl, I’m tall and very broad and curvy. I’ve been going to parties for just over a year and I’ve learned that I’m a bit like marmite and men seem to either be really into me or not at all. But I’ve also realised that I don’t fancy everyone that I see either. In fact quite the opposite. So it’s absolutely ok if not everyone fancies me and whoever else is there makes no difference to that. No point feeling self conscious, just to do your thing and don’t give who else is there a second thought, it really will make no difference. Everyone in a club is there to be admired regardless of how they look, there’s someone for everyone. | |||
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"I have found the customers at these events can be far from the normal type of clientele you would normally expect in a club. It has been obvious that they got in on a guest list and were not paid up members who value their membership ! With a lack of manners and etiquette from both males and females. Whilst I accept that a bbw event is just that a club should still cater for its bread and butter members. I love larger women, my partner is a big woman so you'd think we'd love bbw nights? But we don't like them, for a lot for the reasons you state. We find there often is a real lack of respect by some of the visitors for women, for etiquette and for the facilities. Men who just think they can help themselves and just throw used condoms anywhere. Seen a pair of young girls throwing beer can into dungeon and heckling at the people playing in there. We are often at it till the end and we never see the club in such as state as it is at the end of bbw night. We been to 2 (2nd by accident as we didn't realise, just fancied sunday in the club). I'm really not sure if we'd go again because there is just so much disrespect. Which is a real shame because of course the majority of people there are great. And to be fair there is always a great selection of all shapes and sizes on a normal club night so we don't need bbw night." We saw the same as you, Rosie wanted to go to the bbw event to see what it was like as she's a bbw, we will never go again, told Mark and zoe behind the bar, if that had been our first experience of the club we would never come back, we was absolutely disgusted by the level of disrespect of people and the club, rudeness off people with their actions and manners, | |||
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"My objections are not really so much about the skinny woman and more about me. As a BBW you go your whole life being compared to slim people and as a newbie swinger (or at least someone who’s had a decade of weight gain since the last visit) I would be mentally comparing myself because I’m new and insecure. I wouldn’t, however suggest that a slim woman shouldn’t be there! That’s just rudeness " | |||
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"I know some bigger girls who are self conscious dressing down if there are slim women at a party, which is why they go to the BBW events. But you can’t impose a size/weight criteria can you? How would that work?! ‘Sorry you’re too slim, you can’t come in’. People have to be more realistic. People can go to whichever party they like. " Very true, you can't descriminate against any body shape it's just not acceptable, if you don't fancy playing with someone don't but there's no need to be rude | |||
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"What's next? Black guys being made to feel uncomfortable on standard club nights because the white guys feel intimidated by tall, well built, well hung black guys? Or black guys feeling uncomfortable when white guys go to night's aimed at black guys because they feel intimidated by men with beer bellies and average cocks?!" Ehm... The former may have already happened. Although I have met black men with beer bellies and we'll-built white men. | |||
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"Do big beautiful men feel as threatened by average weight guys at club nights for big beautiful men?" No such club night exists except in the gay scene for "bears" | |||
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"Thanks for comments I agree club nights should be all inclusive whatever label is put on them and people should be respectful regardless of sexuality, age or size. Will give it a go and hopefully will be a good night." We found it very cliquey the one time we went and some people were rude so we haven't been to one since. | |||
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"Do big beautiful men feel as threatened by average weight guys at club nights for big beautiful men? No such club night exists except in the gay scene for "bears" " I wonder why not? | |||
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"We have found that BBW parties attract more black men than white - this then attracts ‘all white’ couples because they want a black bull for the wife/gf. There are plenty of interracial parties for all sizes. 99% of these slim ladies are NOT there to admire/play with BBWs. There are plenty of parties that don’t let me in because I’m a BBW so give us a break So surely the problem is the black men who play with the slim ladies at BBW parties? Evie do you think this whole issue is a problem? It seems somewhat blown out of proportion. " Honestly....no, not at all. I'm the god knows how many years I have been arranging these nights I have never restricted who can attend....not by size, gender, sexuality etc and I never will. They have and remain very popular and great fun. | |||
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