FabSwingers.com forum: First club experience as single guy

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I've been to a club before as part of a couple and last night went on my own for the first time. Maybe it's because I'm new to the whole 'swinging' malarkey or because I'm not pushy but I just felt so awkward stood around most of the night by myself as couples stuck together. There were max 3 girls who weren't part of a couple. Just wondering what people would give as advice to single guys at clubs, are they even wanted there? I really doubt I'll be going on my own to one again

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By *layful Couple For YouCouple
over a year ago

Lust

We know it can be difficult to initially approach people but we’ve found a simple “Hi, I’m _____, is it ok to join you for a drink”. Then commence with a little small talk, it’ll soon become apparent if they’re interested in things going further

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We know it can be difficult to initially approach people but we’ve found a simple “Hi, I’m _____, is it ok to join you for a drink”. Then commence with a little small talk, it’ll soon become apparent if they’re interested in things going further

Okay ill try that, thanks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've been to a club before as part of a couple and last night went on my own for the first time. Maybe it's because I'm new to the whole 'swinging' malarkey or because I'm not pushy but I just felt so awkward stood around most of the night by myself as couples stuck together. There were max 3 girls who weren't part of a couple. Just wondering what people would give as advice to single guys at clubs, are they even wanted there? I really doubt I'll be going on my own to one again"
get in Jacuzzi chat

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

I was going to suggest the Jacuzzi too. So much easier to start a conversation in there. Or stand near the pool table and chat to the people playing. Also don't just look for single ladies. Couples often want a single man to join them. Good luck.

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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago

Stoke area

I don't know why you don't chat to couples. They may be there to find a chap for the lady to play with. But I really think there is no harm in chatting to everyone at club's. Making friends, getting verifications, you may get future party invites.

Don't just chat to single girls in future !

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don't know why you don't chat to couples. They may be there to find a chap for the lady to play with. But I really think there is no harm in chatting to everyone at club's. Making friends, getting verifications, you may get future party invites.

Don't just chat to single girls in future !"

Yeh I think I will next time. Was pretty nervous and just stood there like a lemon haha

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By *iversong321Woman
over a year ago

Preston/Merseyside

Don't just chat to single girls in future !

Yeh I think I will next time. Was pretty nervous and just stood there like a lemon haha"

Maybe that is why people weren't chatting to you. Smile. Do small talk and work the room. No good in social situations? Practice small talk when in other social scenarios - at the supermarket, at the petrol station. Anywhere.

Why people think that they are going to be successful if they just stand there amazes me. You need to make an effort. If not go to a sex club where a fuck is guaranteed.

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By *atEvolutionCouple
over a year ago

Hot WIVES 01 March

Ask the hosts to assist you with introductions - they will most likely know who you are best approaching.

You sometimes hear complaints from people saying 'that club was no good because nobody was playing' - more often than not it means 'nobody was playing with me'. Get involved. get chatting, and keep trying . . . it takes time . . . accepted faces have better results than random ones . . .

Though the host/s may help . . . you have to do some work yourself

Cat X

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By *ngeluk69Woman
over a year ago

Near enough

Always smile, say hi, make small talk... even do the whole ‘this is my first time here, have you been before, do you recommend any other clubs’ etc etc. Even if the people you talk to aren’t interested in playing, you’re interacting and as you go to places you’ll be recognised.

One thing I always like is a good aftershave on a guy, good excuse to strike up a conversation (cheesy I know!!), ‘oh wow you smell good, what is that?’ It’s a positive first impression and I’ve been known to grab a friend and say ‘omg smell this guy’ and we’ve ended up having some great fun.

Just don’t do the holding your drink, stood in the corner looking sorry for yourself thing... you won’t catch anyone’s eye that way

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By *ll 4 herCouple
over a year ago

Bury/Bolton

The above is some great advice.

We are one of the couples who go to clubs looking for single guys to join us, we still find it amazing that every time we go it is incredibly rare that a single guy approaches us or even says so much as hello.

But they'll follow us the second we go to a room in the hope we'll invite them, similarly if we play anywhere open they're stood there cock in hand.

Both the above scenarios rule out any possibility we'll invite them or engage with them in the future because it tells us they have no understanding of how it works, and are just expecting she'll open her legs for them at their minimal effort.

The Moral :- speak to people, the worst you'll hear is no thanks.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

This is great advice guys thanks. I'm not the best in social situations but I'll try the nice cologne and say hi to as many people as possible without the view of being invited back with them just to make friends

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By *orticiaWoman
over a year ago

Wirral

All good advice above ... also, look for an event that you think will suit you. If couples aren’t your thing, try a party night where there are a bigger number of singles. There are all sorts of different nights at most clubs, such as BBW nights, cougar nights, under 40’s nights, bi nights, play nights, social nights, greedy girls events ... Find the one that floats you boat the most!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"All good advice above ... also, look for an event that you think will suit you. If couples aren’t your thing, try a party night where there are a bigger number of singles. There are all sorts of different nights at most clubs, such as BBW nights, cougar nights, under 40’s nights, bi nights, play nights, social nights, greedy girls events ... Find the one that floats you boat the most!"

I would love to find a cougar night but none of the clubs near me seem to do them

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By *achoCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

Hey, this is all great advice to couples as well ! We can all be a bit shy and awkward going into these places....

Nacho

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Camden

"Hey, this is all great advice to couples as well ! We can all be a bit shy and awkward going into these places....

Nacho

I’ll second that; being on your own in one of these places is immensely daunting, at least a couple has their partner to ‘lean on’. In future, if a couple sees a guy on his own, looking a bit lost, please say ‘Hi’, you may just stop him leaving because nobody else has spoken to him all night

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