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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

We are sure this has been covered before but always good to re-cover things, fresh viewpoints, changing opinions etc....

We visited a club we have not been to before last night, superb place, excellent rooms, facilities etc.

We were shown round, made to feel very welcome by the staff and at first thought "yes we are in for a superb night".

Went to the bar area, had a sit down and unlike at other clubs people didn't seem to mingle outside their own group and there was lots of couples sat alone etc.

We had a mooch around and went to each of the about 10-11 separate rooms/areas and in each one people were talking and having conversations that were not sexually based.

Now I know this is a club but we mean in the play areas. Can understand in the bar, hot tub, sauna etc but people were having conversations about what breed of dog they have, their aches and pains, and the car they are thinking of getting next year (actual conversations) whilst people were trying to play and have fun/sex.

We were pretty unmotivated to start stripping down and get things going ourselves with all the random chat killing the mood so went and chilled back at the bar.

We went back around with an hour to go till close and was the same, lots of random loud normal chat going on.

I know people will maybe say "tell the staff" etc but it was in pretty much every room and unfortunately all private rooms were taken.

I don't think we were being over sensitive but it did spoil what we initially anticipated to be a superb night at an amazing venue.

We eventually went into a room settled into our play and a guy started talking to his partner about all sorts of random gibberish which completely put us off.

Nobody said anything so being the "newbies" decided just to leave the room and as it was almost the end of the night decided to head off.

Any thoughts?

We are a pretty laid back, chilled pair so can take a bit of criticism if people think we should "accept" it's just the way it is, but having been to other venues it wasn't like this.

Amazing club, strange ambience.

Not going to discuss which club etc as think this would be unfair on an otherwise fantastic place with great staff and facilities.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Iv only been to one club and I didn't experience that sort of thing in the play areas. There was the bar, jacuzzi and even a lounge for that sort of chat.

Maybe put it down to a funny night and try again another time, if not enjoy the usual clubs you go and this doesn't happen

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Yeah we did say in car in way home "maybe it was just one of those nights".

Definately go again as great place but will monopolise one of the private rooms early

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By *he Queen of TartsWoman
Forum Mod
over a year ago

My Own Little World

I find this irritating, there are plenty of social areas, bugger off and socialise there. Or when they stand right outside the playroom chatting and laughing....grrrr. I have been known to yell at them through the door to shut up or fuck off. They did

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is happening more and more in clubs sadly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lots of clubs have "one of those nights" at some point or another. Unfortunately you just can't ever gauge how it's going to go. Some nights there are mental orgys going on in all the rooms, other nights it's a mothers meeting. It's the way of the world unfortunately and it's not an accurate reflection on the club or its members, best advice is go again a few more times and see what the atmosphere is like. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It has always happened, l think of number of couples see it as a night out for a social catch up that extends into the play area.

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By *indandfireCouple
over a year ago

ashbourne

It does kill the mood. For me even having those conversations in the bar drives me mad. I don't feel like having sex with someone who has been telling me about their kids school, the dog at the vets and their broken down van!!!!?

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London

Sort of related .... I hate those clubs that say you have to be 'dressed to play' (by their standards) in order to enter the playrooms .... not sure if it is because I dislike being told what to do or because if I am dressed, that is how I like to be dressed. Maybe not all clubs suit everyone, we certainly haven't found one we really clicked with ...

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

We're glad this hasn't been taken as a "moan thread".

It felt really like a social night out with fewer clothes last night, but we will try again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes OP people engaged in small talk in or near play areas is a problem, some people have no idea how off putting it can be, when we play we like to get in the zone and nothing more off putting than inane chat.

Secondly people staying in there own groups is very common at clubs, EVERY club has these people, generally regulars or better known as "The Clique" don't worry about it, they are better left alone, you are not missing a thing, many people arrange to specifically meet others at a club and this causes people to stay within there little group too.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Seems the longer you are on the swinging scene, the more sociable you become, like a kid in a sweet shop to begin with, then it all gets a bit "meh". Been there, teeshirt etc.

Maybe I'm just getting old. But as said before, no 2 nights will be the same.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Seems the longer you are on the swinging scene, the more sociable you become, like a kid in a sweet shop to begin with, then it all gets a bit "meh". Been there, teeshirt etc.

Maybe I'm just getting old. But as said before, no 2 nights will be the same. "

2 1/2 years swinging we hope we never get like that

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By *ndykinkyMan
over a year ago

STOKE-ON-TRENT


"Yes OP people engaged in small talk in or near play areas is a problem, some people have no idea how off putting it can be, when we play we like to get in the zone and nothing more off putting than inane chat.

Secondly people staying in there own groups is very common at clubs, EVERY club has these people, generally regulars or better known as "The Clique" don't worry about it, they are better left alone, you are not missing a thing, many people arrange to specifically meet others at a club and this causes people to stay within there little group too....."

Not necessarily a clique, just friends catching up with each other. It can be difficult to get to know people especially if newbies go and sit in a corner away from everyone.Try to stay near the bar that way you have the bar staff to chat to and a chance to chat to others as they get drinks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Seems the longer you are on the swinging scene, the more sociable you become, like a kid in a sweet shop to begin with, then it all gets a bit "meh". Been there, teeshirt etc.

Maybe I'm just getting old. But as said before, no 2 nights will be the same.

2 1/2 years swinging we hope we never get like that "

Get back to me in 6 months lol.......my mojo left after 3 years. Some happy memories, great times.

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London


"Seems the longer you are on the swinging scene, the more sociable you become, like a kid in a sweet shop to begin with, then it all gets a bit "meh". Been there, teeshirt etc.

Maybe I'm just getting old. But as said before, no 2 nights will be the same.

2 1/2 years swinging we hope we never get like that "

We've got like that and we think it's a good there Ng because we get more from each other than we could ever get rom anyone else. I do think it has a shelf life and when you are in a relationship, that relationship should come first. To find swinging doesn't hit all the spots and your relationship does is hardly a bas thing, surely?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Seems the longer you are on the swinging scene, the more sociable you become, like a kid in a sweet shop to begin with, then it all gets a bit "meh". Been there, teeshirt etc.

Maybe I'm just getting old. But as said before, no 2 nights will be the same.

2 1/2 years swinging we hope we never get like that

We've got like that and we think it's a good there Ng because we get more from each other than we could ever get rom anyone else. I do think it has a shelf life and when you are in a relationship, that relationship should come first. To find swinging doesn't hit all the spots and your relationship does is hardly a bas thing, surely?"

No its a great thing to find someone that makes you happy and content in every way, definitely a shelf life, and I think I'm out of date,

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London


"Seems the longer you are on the swinging scene, the more sociable you become, like a kid in a sweet shop to begin with, then it all gets a bit "meh". Been there, teeshirt etc.

Maybe I'm just getting old. But as said before, no 2 nights will be the same.

2 1/2 years swinging we hope we never get like that

We've got like that and we think it's a good there Ng because we get more from each other than we could ever get rom anyone else. I do think it has a shelf life and when you are in a relationship, that relationship should come first. To find swinging doesn't hit all the spots and your relationship does is hardly a bas thing, surely?

No its a great thing to find someone that makes you happy and content in every way, definitely a shelf life, and I think I'm out of date, "

I think we are too .... but much happier like this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Seems the longer you are on the swinging scene, the more sociable you become, like a kid in a sweet shop to begin with, then it all gets a bit "meh". Been there, teeshirt etc.

Maybe I'm just getting old. But as said before, no 2 nights will be the same.

2 1/2 years swinging we hope we never get like that

We've got like that and we think it's a good there Ng because we get more from each other than we could ever get rom anyone else. I do think it has a shelf life and when you are in a relationship, that relationship should come first. To find swinging doesn't hit all the spots and your relationship does is hardly a bas thing, surely?

No its a great thing to find someone that makes you happy and content in every way, definitely a shelf life, and I think I'm out of date,

I think we are too .... but much happier like this. "

Just can't keep off the forums, I love the arguments lol.....addictive stuff.

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London


"Seems the longer you are on the swinging scene, the more sociable you become, like a kid in a sweet shop to begin with, then it all gets a bit "meh". Been there, teeshirt etc.

Maybe I'm just getting old. But as said before, no 2 nights will be the same.

2 1/2 years swinging we hope we never get like that

We've got like that and we think it's a good there Ng because we get more from each other than we could ever get rom anyone else. I do think it has a shelf life and when you are in a relationship, that relationship should come first. To find swinging doesn't hit all the spots and your relationship does is hardly a bas thing, surely?

No its a great thing to find someone that makes you happy and content in every way, definitely a shelf life, and I think I'm out of date,

I think we are too .... but much happier like this.

Just can't keep off the forums, I love the arguments lol.....addictive stuff. "

That's me too (can you guess) although Mr still likes talking to people and occasional male male meet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Seems the longer you are on the swinging scene, the more sociable you become, like a kid in a sweet shop to begin with, then it all gets a bit "meh". Been there, teeshirt etc.

Maybe I'm just getting old. But as said before, no 2 nights will be the same.

2 1/2 years swinging we hope we never get like that

We've got like that and we think it's a good there Ng because we get more from each other than we could ever get rom anyone else. I do think it has a shelf life and when you are in a relationship, that relationship should come first. To find swinging doesn't hit all the spots and your relationship does is hardly a bas thing, surely?

No its a great thing to find someone that makes you happy and content in every way, definitely a shelf life, and I think I'm out of date,

I think we are too .... but much happier like this.

Just can't keep off the forums, I love the arguments lol.....addictive stuff.

That's me too (can you guess) although Mr still likes talking to people and occasional male male meet"

That's fair enough, I just can't be bothered anymore with clubs or parties, believe me, i/we had some great times, even did our own parties, but since I met this random guy in may, I've become a totally different person, never expected it, right out the blue, but still loving it. I think we have deviated a bit from the ops post lol.

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London


"Seems the longer you are on the swinging scene, the more sociable you become, like a kid in a sweet shop to begin with, then it all gets a bit "meh". Been there, teeshirt etc.

Maybe I'm just getting old. But as said before, no 2 nights will be the same.

2 1/2 years swinging we hope we never get like that

We've got like that and we think it's a good there Ng because we get more from each other than we could ever get rom anyone else. I do think it has a shelf life and when you are in a relationship, that relationship should come first. To find swinging doesn't hit all the spots and your relationship does is hardly a bas thing, surely?

No its a great thing to find someone that makes you happy and content in every way, definitely a shelf life, and I think I'm out of date,

I think we are too .... but much happier like this.

Just can't keep off the forums, I love the arguments lol.....addictive stuff.

That's me too (can you guess) although Mr still likes talking to people and occasional male male meet

That's fair enough, I just can't be bothered anymore with clubs or parties, believe me, i/we had some great times, even did our own parties, but since I met this random guy in may, I've become a totally different person, never expected it, right out the blue, but still loving it. I think we have deviated a bit from the ops post lol. "

Slightly, but that's what posting is all about. When we met, two years ago, we talked about where to go next after you've been so extreme ....sort of hit us out of the blue too, where we have ended up ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Seems the longer you are on the swinging scene, the more sociable you become, like a kid in a sweet shop to begin with, then it all gets a bit "meh". Been there, teeshirt etc.

Maybe I'm just getting old. But as said before, no 2 nights will be the same.

2 1/2 years swinging we hope we never get like that

We've got like that and we think it's a good there Ng because we get more from each other than we could ever get rom anyone else. I do think it has a shelf life and when you are in a relationship, that relationship should come first. To find swinging doesn't hit all the spots and your relationship does is hardly a bas thing, surely?

No its a great thing to find someone that makes you happy and content in every way, definitely a shelf life, and I think I'm out of date,

I think we are too .... but much happier like this.

Just can't keep off the forums, I love the arguments lol.....addictive stuff.

That's me too (can you guess) although Mr still likes talking to people and occasional male male meet

That's fair enough, I just can't be bothered anymore with clubs or parties, believe me, i/we had some great times, even did our own parties, but since I met this random guy in may, I've become a totally different person, never expected it, right out the blue, but still loving it. I think we have deviated a bit from the ops post lol.

Slightly, but that's what posting is all about. When we met, two years ago, we talked about where to go next after you've been so extreme ....sort of hit us out of the blue too, where we have ended up ... "

Lol, it's a strange old world, one minute gang bangs, group sex, mad sex, then the next, very, extremely happy with this guy who is as vanilla as they come. We are even talking about getting married!!!!!!! If you had told me a year ago, this would of happened, I would not have believed you, life can turn around in a blink of an eye.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I enjoy chatting to people when at a club so i am one of those people that would annoy you lol.

I can't and don't play with anyone that we havn't chatted to first. I have to have a connection with the person we are playing with. Mainly i chat about football too which often suprises people.

My fav club is City Celts in Leicester and hubby and i have great fun there and part of that fun is chatting with people in the hot tub and also chatting with Judith, the owner, and others in the bar area.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I enjoy chatting to people when at a club so i am one of those people that would annoy you lol.

I can't and don't play with anyone that we havn't chatted to first. I have to have a connection with the person we are playing with. Mainly i chat about football too which often suprises people.

My fav club is City Celts in Leicester and hubby and i have great fun there and part of that fun is chatting with people in the hot tub and also chatting with Judith, the owner, and others in the bar area."

Chatting is fine in the social areas we love a good chin wag but not in the play areas.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I enjoy chatting to people when at a club so i am one of those people that would annoy you lol.

I can't and don't play with anyone that we havn't chatted to first. I have to have a connection with the person we are playing with. Mainly i chat about football too which often suprises people.

My fav club is City Celts in Leicester and hubby and i have great fun there and part of that fun is chatting with people in the hot tub and also chatting with Judith, the owner, and others in the bar area.

Chatting is fine in the social areas we love a good chin wag but not in the play areas."

It totally puts me off and gets me out of 'the zone' very quickly. Some inconsiderate folk about.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 02/10/16 18:26:38]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can't be bothered to reply so deleted it !

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By *hoenixcouplexxCouple
over a year ago

Leicestershire

We've had this on occasion too. I think some clubs are worse than others for it as it's excepted as 'the norm' at some places. But generally it is more the luck of the draw on who is in on any given night.

It really does put us off our stride though. Same as fully clothed people walking in and treating it like a viewing gallery in the play areas. At least go down to underwear do you don't like so out of place people!

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London


"We've had this on occasion too. I think some clubs are worse than others for it as it's excepted as 'the norm' at some places. But generally it is more the luck of the draw on who is in on any given night.

It really does put us off our stride though. Same as fully clothed people walking in and treating it like a viewing gallery in the play areas. At least go down to underwear do you don't like so out of place people!"

Although I get this, I play with clothes on, not underwear .... and the sight of naked bodies just reminds we of being on the beach (growing up her the seaside not that they were naked on the beach, just exposing lots of flesh). I don't find nakedness in clubs sexy at all, nor do I find people prancing about in their underwear or dictating that I should wear mine sexy. Maybe if people don't want an audience, they should go into a private room? I don't go into any of the play areas in clubs because there's nothing to see there of any interest, too vanilla for me, so may as well have a chat about the price of fish

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By *hoenixcouplexxCouple
over a year ago

Leicestershire


"We've had this on occasion too. I think some clubs are worse than others for it as it's excepted as 'the norm' at some places. But generally it is more the luck of the draw on who is in on any given night.

It really does put us off our stride though. Same as fully clothed people walking in and treating it like a viewing gallery in the play areas. At least go down to underwear do you don't like so out of place people!

Although I get this, I play with clothes on, not underwear .... and the sight of naked bodies just reminds we of being on the beach (growing up her the seaside not that they were naked on the beach, just exposing lots of flesh). I don't find nakedness in clubs sexy at all, nor do I find people prancing about in their underwear or dictating that I should wear mine sexy. Maybe if people don't want an audience, they should go into a private room? I don't go into any of the play areas in clubs because there's nothing to see there of any interest, too vanilla for me, so may as well have a chat about the price of fish"

Not all clubs have lockable private rooms and if they are not lockable people just come in anyway! If the club rules state underwear, towels or naked in the play rooms then I don't think it is unfair at all to expect the patrons to abide by the rules of the club.

On the other hand if you don't go into play areas in clubs because they are to vanilla for you why would it bother you what other people do in there?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No issue with asking people to help us out on a play room by politely asking them to be considerate. Also no issue with gently speaking to people quietly is there is a scene going on.

If you do it in the right way most people are grateful for the help. As sometimes people don't realise.

Sharing good etiquette, is good etiquette.

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

some clubs are like this

some nights are like this

i try places more than once and try to experience different 'themes'

there are a couple of clubs i wouldnt go to as a single..but one one i wouldnt go to again, unless i was dragged there by a very good friend, for a very good reason.

keep trying, there is a club out there for you, where you will feel perfectly at home, you just got to find it xxx

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London


"We've had this on occasion too. I think some clubs are worse than others for it as it's excepted as 'the norm' at some places. But generally it is more the luck of the draw on who is in on any given night.

It really does put us off our stride though. Same as fully clothed people walking in and treating it like a viewing gallery in the play areas. At least go down to underwear do you don't like so out of place people!

Although I get this, I play with clothes on, not underwear .... and the sight of naked bodies just reminds we of being on the beach (growing up her the seaside not that they were naked on the beach, just exposing lots of flesh). I don't find nakedness in clubs sexy at all, nor do I find people prancing about in their underwear or dictating that I should wear mine sexy. Maybe if people don't want an audience, they should go into a private room? I don't go into any of the play areas in clubs because there's nothing to see there of any interest, too vanilla for me, so may as well have a chat about the price of fish

Not all clubs have lockable private rooms and if they are not lockable people just come in anyway! If the club rules state underwear, towels or naked in the play rooms then I don't think it is unfair at all to expect the patrons to abide by the rules of the club.

On the other hand if you don't go into play areas in clubs because they are to vanilla for you why would it bother you what other people do in there?"

It doesn't bother me, I don't even notice most of the time

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By *herealdeal90Man
over a year ago

Huddersfield

You gotta remember just because you're in a swingers club people are just the ordinary people you'll meet in everyday life. So will talk about the football, cars, etc. I agree though shouldn't do it in the play rooms: it's abit off putting. But in the bar, sauna it's all good

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