FabSwingers.com forum: Firist time kestrels / abfabs

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi thete how is everyone good i hope.

First time me wrting in a forum so hope this goes ok.

I am looking to try kestels for the first time during the day time and was wondering if i can tips or adivce please.

Many thanks in advance

Asianmale

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By *lovisMan
over a year ago

Twickenham

This question comes up regularly so search the forum and you'll find lots of advice.

My 2 tips

1. Take flip-flops

2. don't be a dick

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By *ty31Man
over a year ago

NW London

My tip.

1. Chat to people and make the effort to be the one to instigate conversations.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My tip

Not everybody will want to talk to you. For some people it is a place for them to go for fun with specific people. If they do not appear to be actively seeking company, leave them be. They may also have noticed you already and decided you are not what they are seeking, that is their choice and it should be respected.

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By *emel9Man
over a year ago

West Midlands

It's easy.

Take food and drink for the fridge.

Take Flip Flops to walk around in.

Don't EXPECT anything..be happy if it does happen.

Chat and be friendly, not just pervy.

No Thank You means No Thank You.

Chill and enjoy.

I typically, weekdays, find Monday's and Wednesday's the busiest. Remember although Monday is Bi Night, there does tend to be more bi people around in the day too. If this isn't for you then the usual rules apply, a polite no thanks.

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By *u and DuCouple
over a year ago

gosport

"This question comes up regularly so search the forum and you'll find lots of advice.

My 2 tips

1. Take flip-flops

2. don't be a dick

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take something warm to wear if you go during the day, a dressing gown for example.

It can be bloody cold at times.

Don't follow couples or single ladies around.

Smile, chat and just enjoy the facilities.

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By *ecretlyASoftieWoman
over a year ago

Hull but travel regularly

Say hi and be friendly but be aware some just go to chill out and may not be interested in random chat. Don't touch without asking. It's a great place if you approach it with the right attitude

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By *lovisMan
over a year ago

Twickenham

1. Dont just talk about sex and swinging.

2. Don't just talk about yourself.

3. Engage with the male and female equally.

4. If you're going to masturbate underwater do it subtly - don't churn the water up (unless you're in the hot tub where it will matter less)

5. Don't try and cop a feel

6. Don't be a dick

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By *lovisMan
over a year ago

Twickenham

Vital one...

Put the locker key on your wrist of your non wanking hand.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

4. If you're going to masturbate underwater do it subtly - don't churn the water up (unless you're in the hot tub where it will matter less)

Yuck!

Just keep your bodily fluids to yourself, especially in the hot tub.

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By *lovisMan
over a year ago

Twickenham

Unless someone else is involved in which case its fine (and inevitable) to blow your load in the pool or hot tub

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Vital one...

Put the locker key on your wrist of your non wanking hand."

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By *ecretlyASoftieWoman
over a year ago

Hull but travel regularly

Oh and from an experience the other week, don't sit by the side of the pool wanking while intently watching the one person in the pool just chilling out floating in the pool. Very creepy

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By *lovisMan
over a year ago

Twickenham

"Oh and from an experience the other week, don't sit by the side of the pool wanking while intently watching the one person in the pool just chilling out floating in the pool. Very creepy

That happens to me all the time..

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By *ecretlyASoftieWoman
over a year ago

Hull but travel regularly

"Oh and from an experience the other week, don't sit by the side of the pool wanking while intently watching the one person in the pool just chilling out floating in the pool. Very creepy

That happens to me all the time.. "

Happens to all us sexy peeps

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Unless someone else is involved in which case its fine (and inevitable) to blow your load in the pool or hot tub"

Well in my opinion solo or partnered it is not fine or inevitable to dump your body fluids in communal pools or hot tubs.

I am surprised such actions are condoned by the clubs management and if it is will certainly effect my view of this club from now on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If your going expecting an out and out swingers club this is not the place to go. I've been to 5 clubs now and this is defo the least aligned to swinging granted I've not been at weekends. The main thing to note is what others have said. Be nice, be respectful and defo don't go with the notion you will have sex. I look at kestrels as a place where woman pay £10 to swim naked. That's life and maybe a little gripe. But for a place to chill it's top notch! Just don't expect any fun

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By *ecretlyASoftieWoman
over a year ago

Hull but travel regularly

"If your going expecting an out and out swingers club this is not the place to go. I've been to 5 clubs now and this is defo the least aligned to swinging granted I've not been at weekends. The main thing to note is what others have said. Be nice, be respectful and defo don't go with the notion you will have sex. I look at kestrels as a place where woman pay £10 to swim naked. That's life and maybe a little gripe. But for a place to chill it's top notch! Just don't expect any fun "

I seem to have plenty thanks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I seem to have plenty thanks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I seem to have plenty thanks

"
I know you have plenty! But your a swinger! You're the real deal! I that came across negative!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi there everyone.

sorry for the delay in a response to all the messages, was at work.

I would like to say many thanks for all your advices and help, I am truly grateful them and will take them on board.

regarding the comment on sitting by the pool side I don't think that will be I am to shy for that..

Plus this is my first every time going to a naturist spa being totally need in front of total strangers, I am out of my comfort zone but I am very curious.

Many thanks again everyone..

Ps I am thinking of going today will leave a message on thread if I do go unless I chicken out..

Many thanks again

Dee

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So I went to Kestrel's

First would like to give a review on them but not sure where to place it..

I have to say as a single male I was very nervous, but when I arrived at the reception desk they were so friendly and made me feel at ease.

I was given a tour of the place to very nice and very big wow.

I was left to go and venture on my own while there I saw a lovely lady she was getting a spanking in the dungeon at first it felt odd actually being a voyeur but nice to.

asked if I could come in tot the room I was given then just seeing Lady N get spanked was amazing, wont say any more there lol but if there are on here would like to verify them.

I have to say for a first time experience in coming out of my comfort zone kinda all in one was scary but fun.

Thank you kestrels.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Excellent - well done you! Sounds like you had the perfect introduction to the place. Glad you had a great time.

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By *ecretlyASoftieWoman
over a year ago

Hull but travel regularly

Glad you had fun and a great first experience

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By *requent_FerryersCouple
over a year ago

Norwich to Great Yarmouth

"Unless someone else is involved in which case its fine (and inevitable) to blow your load in the pool or hot tub

Well in my opinion solo or partnered it is not fine or inevitable to dump your body fluids in communal pools or hot tubs.

I am surprised such actions are condoned by the clubs management and if it is will certainly effect my view of this club from now on."

We are heading there for our first visit this weekend with friends.

This has completely put us off going now. If we do go, we will NOT be getting anywhere near the pool or hot-tub!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be fair I have never seen this happen so wonder if it is more a bit of a "humorous throwaway line" by the poster.

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By *emel9Man
over a year ago

West Midlands

It's my understanding that you aren't supposed to do that at all. There is "fun" in the pools, but that is a no no.

The staff also check the pool, and hot tubs, several times a day; performing all sorts of checks on the water.

The hot tubs can sometimes be closed for a while as they go through a routine cleaning cycle too.

In my own opinion it's very clean.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Unless someone else is involved in which case its fine (and inevitable) to blow your load in the pool or hot tub

Well in my opinion solo or partnered it is not fine or inevitable to dump your body fluids in communal pools or hot tubs.

I am surprised such actions are condoned by the clubs management and if it is will certainly effect my view of this club from now on.

We are heading there for our first visit this weekend with friends.

This has completely put us off going now. If we do go, we will NOT be getting anywhere near the pool or hot-tub!!

When I went I did not see anything like that, tbh, when I did speak to anyone there they were very friendly, for someone like me going first time and nervous was really happy with the day I had.

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By *emel9Man
over a year ago

West Midlands

"When I went I did not see anything like that, tbh, when I did speak to anyone there they were very friendly, for someone like me going first time and nervous was really happy with the day I had. "

Good for you....hopefully not your first and last visit.

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By *requent_FerryersCouple
over a year ago

Norwich to Great Yarmouth

We will see..

Still not going near any water though!! Eeeew!

You see what a "playful" comment will do? Completely destroy the perception of a club?

We hope we are going to have a good time... But we doubt t now!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Unless someone else is involved in which case its fine (and inevitable) to blow your load in the pool or hot tub

Well in my opinion solo or partnered it is not fine or inevitable to dump your body fluids in communal pools or hot tubs.

I am surprised such actions are condoned by the clubs management and if it is will icertainly effect my view of this club from now on.

We are heading there for our first visit this weekend with friends.

This has completely put us off going now. If we do go, we will NOT be getting anywhere near the pool or hot-tub!!

"
i was there last thurs i didnt see anyone wanking in the pool or jacuzzi i saw a guy wanking in a room while watching porn dont let anyone put u off they are spotless clean there x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We will see..

Still not going near any water though!! Eeeew!

You see what a "playful" comment will do? Completely destroy the perception of a club?

We hope we are going to have a good time... But we doubt t now!"

Good to see you're going with such an open mind.

There will be lots of people in the water having a good time.

I guess you never swim in public or hotel pools?

Here's some numbers for you

The pool at Kestrels holds about 25,000 gallons of water. The average male ejaculates 3-5 cc of fluid. If one bloke comes in the pool that equals 0.0000044% of the contents or 1/22,720,000 if fractions are more your thing.

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By *ecretlyASoftieWoman
over a year ago

Hull but travel regularly

"We will see..

Still not going near any water though!! Eeeew!

You see what a "playful" comment will do? Completely destroy the perception of a club?

We hope we are going to have a good time... But we doubt t now!

Good to see you're going with such an open mind.

There will be lots of people in the water having a good time.

I guess you never swim in public or hotel pools?

Here's some numbers for you

Love such a precise mathematical response. That's horny. Clothes and intelligence appear to turn me on of late. I'm getting weird in my old age :D

Oh and the pool and hot tub were both spotlessly clean when I left them an hour ago

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By *lovisMan
over a year ago

Twickenham

"We will see..

Still not going near any water though!! Eeeew!

You see what a "playful" comment will do? Completely destroy the perception of a club?

We hope we are going to have a good time... But we doubt t now!

Good to see you're going with such an open mind.

There will be lots of people in the water having a good time.

I guess you never swim in public or hotel pools?

Here's some numbers for you

Love such a precise mathematical response. That's horny. Clothes and intelligence appear to turn me on of late. I'm getting weird in my old age :D

Oh and the pool and hot tub were both spotlessly clean when I left them an hour ago

As the other poster said I'd be more wary in a hotel pool where kids are peeing and pooping (albeit into nappies) than I would be at Kestrels.

You are getting weird....

So it would take the entire male population of Spain having a wank to fill up the pool?

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By *requent_FerryersCouple
over a year ago

Norwich to Great Yarmouth

"We will see..

Still not going near any water though!! Eeeew!

You see what a "playful" comment will do? Completely destroy the perception of a club?

We hope we are going to have a good time... But we doubt t now!

Good to see you're going with such an open mind.

There will be lots of people in the water having a good time.

I guess you never swim in public or hotel pools?

Here's some numbers for you

We have cancelled going to AbFabs.

Thank you for making our decision easier! xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's a pity that you have been put off especially as it may well have been a club that you could have a great time at.

I hope you find a fun alternative and have an enjoyable time.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So this was the first time I have written in a forum like this, for me not to easy, at the same time first time ever going to kestrels to yes I had concerns, but I would suggest just go during the day time and relax staff very friendly and they keep every thing to notch standards, and you can tell they pride themselves on that. I do feel bad that I started this and you have kinda got a bad impression from it to which was not the intention... it was started so I can get advice

- what to do

- what not to

- what is accepted

- what is not accepted

and it did help, and I am just very greatful with all the advice was given, many thanks to everyone that commented.

Just would like to say if we are at Kestrels at the same time at any point I would like to come say hi and thanks for the advice..

Asianmale

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By *ecretlyASoftieWoman
over a year ago

Hull but travel regularly

You are getting weird...

So it would take the entire male population of Spain having a wank to fill up the pool? "

That's a fetish and fantasy for some equally weird people of the other end of the scale. I like to think I'm middling with a liking for a more intimate bukkake

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This post hasn't put everyone off.

I'm considering my first trip there next month.

Very nervous, but reassuring to read the positive contributions.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We love Ab Fabs! Its one of the best clubs in our opinion.. well worth the 400 mile round trip when we visit!

If people are put off by a bit of swingers humour then they are missing out!

April x

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By *aucy tiggerWoman
over a year ago

Back where I belong

I regularly visit kestrels / ab Fabs and it is ALWAYS spotlessly clean and the people friendly.

To be honest if you're put off by any of the comments then would suggest you find a club without hot tubs or pool or try the Bristol Gardens.

All the clubs I've been to have had people Playing ' in the tubs and pools or better still buy your own and stay at home if you're that concerned

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This post hasn't put everyone off.

I'm considering my first trip there next month.

Very nervous, but reassuring to read the positive contributions."

Really, there's nothing to be worried about. You should slot in just fine. I appreciate that it can be a bit nervous the first time you consider going anywhere - I was the same with Kestrels. However, I had nothing to worry about. It is a very friendly place and it is very easy to just settle in.

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By *requent_FerryersCouple
over a year ago

Norwich to Great Yarmouth

"I regularly visit kestrels / ab Fabs and it is ALWAYS spotlessly clean and the people friendly.

To be honest if you're put off by any of the comments then would suggest you find a club without hot tubs or pool or try the Bristol Gardens.

All the clubs I've been to have had people Playing ' in the tubs and pools or better still buy your own and stay at home if you're that concerned "

Well, for the first part, we did not take the sequence of posts as humour. For the second part, we have noted your comment as a regular at AbFabs and decided to follow your advice. So we are going to Tease2 this weekend instead.

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By *aucy tiggerWoman
over a year ago

Back where I belong

"I regularly visit kestrels / ab Fabs and it is ALWAYS spotlessly clean and the people friendly.

To be honest if you're put off by any of the comments then would suggest you find a club without hot tubs or pool or try the Bristol Gardens.

All the clubs I've been to have had people Playing ' in the tubs and pools or better still buy your own and stay at home if you're that concerned

And I'm sure you'll find something to complain about there to xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I regularly visit kestrels / ab Fabs and it is ALWAYS spotlessly clean and the people friendly.

To be honest if you're put off by any of the comments then would suggest you find a club without hot tubs or pool or try the Bristol Gardens.

All the clubs I've been to have had people Playing ' in the tubs and pools or better still buy your own and stay at home if you're that concerned

And I'm sure you'll find something to complain about there to xx"

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By *requent_FerryersCouple
over a year ago

Norwich to Great Yarmouth

"I regularly visit kestrels / ab Fabs and it is ALWAYS spotlessly clean and the people friendly.

To be honest if you're put off by any of the comments then would suggest you find a club without hot tubs or pool or try the Bristol Gardens.

All the clubs I've been to have had people Playing ' in the tubs and pools or better still buy your own and stay at home if you're that concerned

And I'm sure you'll find something to complain about there to xx"

Quite the opposite! We have been before and think it is a great place. Had the most amazing time in the cinema room with three other couples!

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By *ecretlyASoftieWoman
over a year ago

Hull but travel regularly

"I regularly visit kestrels / ab Fabs and it is ALWAYS spotlessly clean and the people friendly.

To be honest if you're put off by any of the comments then would suggest you find a club without hot tubs or pool or try the Bristol Gardens.

All the clubs I've been to have had people Playing ' in the tubs and pools or better still buy your own and stay at home if you're that concerned

And I'm sure you'll find something to complain about there to xx

Quite the opposite! We have been before and think it is a great place. Had the most amazing time in the cinema room with three other couples!

Hope you avoided all bodily fluids

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By *requent_FerryersCouple
over a year ago

Norwich to Great Yarmouth

Hope you avoided all bodily fluids

Thank you for that input, I am sure I didn't!

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By *ecretlyASoftieWoman
over a year ago

Hull but travel regularly

Hope you avoided all bodily fluids

Thank you for that input, I am sure I didn't!"

What, pure unadulterated bodily fluids and not diluted to the nth degree like Abfabs? Be careful it's a dangerous spunky world out there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hope you avoided all bodily fluids

Thank you for that input, I am sure I didn't!

What, pure unadulterated bodily fluids and not diluted to the nth degree like Abfabs? Be careful it's a dangerous spunky world out there

Wouldnt 'Spunky World ' be a great name for a swingers theme park?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hope you avoided all bodily fluids

Thank you for that input, I am sure I didn't!

What, pure unadulterated bodily fluids and not diluted to the nth degree like Abfabs? Be careful it's a dangerous spunky world out there

Wouldnt 'Spunky World ' be a great name for a swingers theme park?"

Careful... name might put people off!! heheh x

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By *ecretlyASoftieWoman
over a year ago

Hull but travel regularly

Hope you avoided all bodily fluids

Thank you for that input, I am sure I didn't!

What, pure unadulterated bodily fluids and not diluted to the nth degree like Abfabs? Be careful it's a dangerous spunky world out there

Wouldnt 'Spunky World ' be a great name for a swingers theme park?

Careful... name might put people off!! heheh x "

Not for some of us filthy bitches. It's catchy. I like it

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By *aucy tiggerWoman
over a year ago

Back where I belong

Hope you avoided all bodily fluids

Thank you for that input, I am sure I didn't!

What, pure unadulterated bodily fluids and not diluted to the nth degree like Abfabs? Be careful it's a dangerous spunky world out there

Wouldnt 'Spunky World ' be a great name for a swingers theme park?

Careful... name might put people off!! heheh x

Not for some of us filthy bitches. It's catchy. I like it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm thinking of going this weekend, do you think I should wear a full body condom in the pool or hot tubs just to be on the safe side?

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By *ecretlyASoftieWoman
over a year ago

Hull but travel regularly

"I'm thinking of going this weekend, do you think I should wear a full body condom in the pool or hot tubs just to be on the safe side?

Depends...will it interfere with the mandatory flip flop rule?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm thinking of going this weekend, do you think I should wear a full body condom in the pool or hot tubs just to be on the safe side?

Depends...will it interfere with the mandatory flip flop rule?

I was thinking of wearing waders too to be doubly safe

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By *aucy tiggerWoman
over a year ago

Back where I belong

"I'm thinking of going this weekend, do you think I should wear a full body condom in the pool or hot tubs just to be on the safe side?

Depends...will it interfere with the mandatory flip flop rule?

Not sure they do full body condoms in my size and how will that work was the, you have to be naked rule?

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By *aucy tiggerWoman
over a year ago

Back where I belong

"I'm thinking of going this weekend, do you think I should wear a full body condom in the pool or hot tubs just to be on the safe side?

Depends...will it interfere with the mandatory flip flop rule?

I was thinking of wearing waders too to be doubly safe

Now you're just being kinky lol xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We will see..

Still not going near any water though!! Eeeew!

You see what a "playful" comment will do? Completely destroy the perception of a club?

We hope we are going to have a good time... But we doubt t now!

Good to see you're going with such an open mind.

There will be lots of people in the water having a good time.

I guess you never swim in public or hotel pools?

Here's some numbers for you

We have cancelled going to AbFabs.

Thank you for making our decision easier! xx"

Thank you so much for making it a better experience for the rest of us x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm thinking of going this weekend, do you think I should wear a full body condom in the pool or hot tubs just to be on the safe side?

Depends...will it interfere with the mandatory flip flop rule?

I was thinking of wearing waders too to be doubly safe

Now you're just being kinky lol xx"

Naked in waders? Sounds like an HDZ outfit!

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By *aucy tiggerWoman
over a year ago

Back where I belong

"We will see..

Still not going near any water though!! Eeeew!

You see what a "playful" comment will do? Completely destroy the perception of a club?

We hope we are going to have a good time... But we doubt t now!

Good to see you're going with such an open mind.

There will be lots of people in the water having a good time.

I guess you never swim in public or hotel pools?

Here's some numbers for you

We have cancelled going to AbFabs.

Thank you for making our decision easier! xx

Thank you so much for making it a better experience for the rest of us x"

My thoughts exactly xx

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By *ecretlyASoftieWoman
over a year ago

Hull but travel regularly

"I'm thinking of going this weekend, do you think I should wear a full body condom in the pool or hot tubs just to be on the safe side?

Depends...will it interfere with the mandatory flip flop rule?

I was thinking of wearing waders too to be doubly safe

Now you're just being kinky lol xx

Naked in waders? Sounds like an HDZ outfit! "

See all you kinky bitches in your waders and full rubber spunky world combat outfits week tomorrow

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By *aucy tiggerWoman
over a year ago

Back where I belong

"I'm thinking of going this weekend, do you think I should wear a full body condom in the pool or hot tubs just to be on the safe side?

Depends...will it interfere with the mandatory flip flop rule?

I was thinking of wearing waders too to be doubly safe

Now you're just being kinky lol xx

Naked in waders? Sounds like an HDZ outfit!

See all you kinky bitches in your waders and full rubber spunky world combat outfits week tomorrow

Not me I'm off to Xtasia xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm thinking of going this weekend, do you think I should wear a full body condom in the pool or hot tubs just to be on the safe side?

Depends...will it interfere with the mandatory flip flop rule?

I was thinking of wearing waders too to be doubly safe

Now you're just being kinky lol xx

Naked in waders? Sounds like an HDZ outfit!

See all you kinky bitches in your waders and full rubber spunky world combat outfits week tomorrow

Not me I'm off to Xtasia xx"

I'd love to visit there sometime. Is it safe to go?

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By *ecretlyASoftieWoman
over a year ago

Hull but travel regularly

"I'm thinking of going this weekend, do you think I should wear a full body condom in the pool or hot tubs just to be on the safe side?

Depends...will it interfere with the mandatory flip flop rule?

I was thinking of wearing waders too to be doubly safe

Now you're just being kinky lol xx

Naked in waders? Sounds like an HDZ outfit!

See all you kinky bitches in your waders and full rubber spunky world combat outfits week tomorrow

Not me I'm off to Xtasia xx

I'd love to visit there sometime. Is it safe to go?

It's even worse....they have FOAM parties

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm thinking of going this weekend, do you think I should wear a full body condom in the pool or hot tubs just to be on the safe side?

Depends...will it interfere with the mandatory flip flop rule?

I was thinking of wearing waders too to be doubly safe

Now you're just being kinky lol xx

Naked in waders? Sounds like an HDZ outfit!

See all you kinky bitches in your waders and full rubber spunky world combat outfits week tomorrow

Not me I'm off to Xtasia xx

I'd love to visit there sometime. Is it safe to go?

It's even worse....they have FOAM parties

I'm not going unless I have a hazmat suit on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm thinking of going this weekend, do you think I should wear a full body condom in the pool or hot tubs just to be on the safe side?

Depends...will it interfere with the mandatory flip flop rule?

I was thinking of wearing waders too to be doubly safe

Now you're just being kinky lol xx

Naked in waders? Sounds like an HDZ outfit!

See all you kinky bitches in your waders and full rubber spunky world combat outfits week tomorrow

Not me I'm off to Xtasia xx

I'd love to visit there sometime. Is it safe to go?

It's even worse....they have FOAM parties

I'm not going unless I have a hazmat suit on

How am I supposed to calculate semen to foam ratios??!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

heading ab fab next month.. just time to get our matching full length ponchos! x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm thinking of going this weekend, do you think I should wear a full body condom in the pool or hot tubs just to be on the safe side?

Depends...will it interfere with the mandatory flip flop rule?

I was thinking of wearing waders too to be doubly safe

Now you're just being kinky lol xx

Naked in waders? Sounds like an HDZ outfit!

See all you kinky bitches in your waders and full rubber spunky world combat outfits week tomorrow

Not me I'm off to Xtasia xx

I'd love to visit there sometime. Is it safe to go?

It's even worse....they have FOAM parties

I'm not going unless I have a hazmat suit on

How am I supposed to calculate semen to foam ratios??!!!"

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By *lovisMan
over a year ago

Twickenham

"I'm thinking of going this weekend, do you think I should wear a full body condom in the pool or hot tubs just to be on the safe side?

Depends...will it interfere with the mandatory flip flop rule?

I was thinking of wearing waders too to be doubly safe

Now you're just being kinky lol xx

Naked in waders? Sounds like an HDZ outfit!

See all you kinky bitches in your waders and full rubber spunky world combat outfits week tomorrow

Not me I'm off to Xtasia xx

I'd love to visit there sometime. Is it safe to go?

It's even worse....they have FOAM parties

I'm not going unless I have a hazmat suit on

How am I supposed to calculate semen to foam ratios??!!!

It's a well known fact you can fall pregnant by inhaling spermicide.

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By *requent_FerryersCouple
over a year ago

Norwich to Great Yarmouth

Thank you so much for making it a better experience for the rest of us x"

Someone pass the milk!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank you so much for making it a better experience for the rest of us x

Someone pass the milk!

Thats not milk....

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By *aucy tiggerWoman
over a year ago

Back where I belong

"I'm thinking of going this weekend, do you think I should wear a full body condom in the pool or hot tubs just to be on the safe side?

Depends...will it interfere with the mandatory flip flop rule?

I was thinking of wearing waders too to be doubly safe

Now you're just being kinky lol xx

Naked in waders? Sounds like an HDZ outfit!

See all you kinky bitches in your waders and full rubber spunky world combat outfits week tomorrow

Not me I'm off to Xtasia xx

I'd love to visit there sometime. Is it safe to go?

I'll tell you when I get back, if I survive lol x

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By *aucy tiggerWoman
over a year ago

Back where I belong

Thank you so much for making it a better experience for the rest of us x

Someone pass the milk!

Thats not milk.... "

Pmsl - oops stand back everybody - bodily fluid on the floor xx

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By *requent_FerryersCouple
over a year ago

Norwich to Great Yarmouth

Thank you so much for making it a better experience for the rest of us x

Someone pass the milk!

Thats not milk....

Pmsl - oops stand back everybody - bodily fluid on the floor xx"

Really don't know how to take you. Humour or bitchiness? (Yes bring on the FAB Police and ban me for a couple of days).

Why are you always so aggressive?

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By *ecretlyASoftieWoman
over a year ago

Hull but travel regularly

Thank you so much for making it a better experience for the rest of us x

Someone pass the milk!

Thats not milk....

Pmsl - oops stand back everybody - bodily fluid on the floor xx

Really don't know how to take you. Humour or bitchiness? (Yes bring on the FAB Police and ban me for a couple of days).

Why are you always so aggressive? "

No need to ban you for asking. You reacted pretty strangely to a throw away comment by someone. You'll find Abfab are very heavy on health and safety (I wasn't joking about the flip flop rule) so for those of us know who the club well, we know your concerns are unfounded. That you changed your mind not to go just seems ridiculous when you'll come in contact with undiluted bloody fluids elsewhere! You didn't come across well and look silly to those of us who know what measures they take to ensure the safety of pool and hot tub facilities. You'll find Abfab regulars love the place and will defend it from critics and we'll do that with humour..,and get bitchy the more ridiculous someone gets. You're missing out on one of the best clubs in the country. But enjoy yourself at tease 2

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By *aucy tiggerWoman
over a year ago

Back where I belong

My profile does warn people, that I don't do tact and diplomacy, but I do sarcasm!

You really should give Ab Fabs a go, it'll be your loss if you don't x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank you so much for making it a better experience for the rest of us x

Someone pass the milk!

Thats not milk....

Pmsl - oops stand back everybody - bodily fluid on the floor xx

Really don't know how to take you. Humour or bitchiness? (Yes bring on the FAB Police and ban me for a couple of days).

Why are you always so aggressive? "

I think this is a massive over reaction nobody has denied doing it. Everyone's jumping on this poor couples back to be fair it would put me off too. But hey single men wonder why they get know where on this site and its a prime example when they start to bitch with others on here about others. Time to grow up people, if this couple have been put off they have been put off there's no need to abuse them like a school playground we are all adults.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank you so much for making it a better experience for the rest of us x

Someone pass the milk!

Thats not milk....

Pmsl - oops stand back everybody - bodily fluid on the floor xx

Really don't know how to take you. Humour or bitchiness? (Yes bring on the FAB Police and ban me for a couple of days).

Why are you always so aggressive?

Totally agree with you. The staff at Kestrels Abfabs are absolutely the best. Very professional and take the job of making this club one of the best around very seriously. Also, those of us that are regular visitors always respect others by clearing up after ourselves too and aren't afraid to ask others to do the same. Looking forward to seeing you there soon J......

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By *ortia71Woman
over a year ago

Richmond

I don't usually post messages but wanted to reassure everyone that we test the pool and hotubs every two hours religiously and if we ask you to vacate for 15 minutes so we can add chlorine etc. It is to keep them scrupulously clean as is for the must of wearing flipflops - so enjoy your day/evening with us without any dirty worries! x

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By *requent_FerryersCouple
over a year ago

Norwich to Great Yarmouth

"I don't usually post messages but wanted to reassure everyone that we test the pool and hotubs every two hours religiously and if we ask you to vacate for 15 minutes so we can add chlorine etc. It is to keep them scrupulously clean as is for the must of wearing flipflops - so enjoy your day/evening with us without any dirty worries! x"

Thank you!!

Your professional message is well received!

See you tomorrow! xxxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can attest to that today by being very politely requested to vacate one of the hot tubs for 15 mins to permit water treatment. Wasn't an issue... We just moved on to one of the scrupulously clean private rooms.....

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

This thread has really made me smile..

It has always been clean when I have been it is a real over reaction to cancel. (enjoy your 2nd choice)

I imagine rolling round on beds with several couples bodily fluids would be far worse than being in a pool.

The wankers are always in the shallow end anyway. I always swim widths in the deep end.

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By *requent_FerryersCouple
over a year ago

Norwich to Great Yarmouth

Well,

We went along anyway! Despite all the encouragement from other posters to this thread... lol

Always been the rebellious ones!

We had a great time! Yes we did stay out of the pool and hot-tub, but that was perhaps because we were enjoying the other extensive areas far too much?

It is a great club and therefore we can sort of empathise with those of you who love it so much and are perhaps a little too vigorous in your defence of your favourite venue?

We have already planned our next visit with friends and just ask those of you who suggested that your experience of the club would be "enriched by our staying away" to give us a wide berth as we sincerely do not want to spoil your enjoyment of an excellent club!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lol just been reading this thread Really made me chuckle, love this club and a regular there . Club is always immaculate and always a pleasure . For the newbees wait till you see it when it's summer it's fantastic and you will love the pool

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well,

We went along anyway! Despite all the encouragement from other posters to this thread... lol

Always been the rebellious ones!

We had a great time! Yes we did stay out of the pool and hot-tub, but that was perhaps because we were enjoying the other extensive areas far too much?

It is a great club and therefore we can sort of empathise with those of you who love it so much and are perhaps a little too vigorous in your defence of your favourite venue?

Well done you - for giving it a go despite your misgivings. I'm also glad you had a great time. At least you have found why we like it so much there!

Look forward to maybe bumping into you some day...

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By *emel9Man
over a year ago

West Midlands

"This thread has really made me smile..

It has always been clean when I have been it is a real over reaction to cancel. (enjoy your 2nd choice)

I imagine rolling round on beds with several couples bodily fluids would be far worse than being in a pool.

The wankers are always in the shallow end anyway. I always swim widths in the deep end.

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By *emel9Man
over a year ago

West Midlands

"Lol just been reading this thread Really made me chuckle, love this club and a regular there . Club is always immaculate and always a pleasure . For the newbees wait till you see it when it's summer it's fantastic and you will love the pool

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By *emel9Man
over a year ago

West Midlands

"Well,

We went along anyway! Despite all the encouragement from other posters to this thread... lol

Always been the rebellious ones!

We had a great time! Yes we did stay out of the pool and hot-tub, but that was perhaps because we were enjoying the other extensive areas far too much?

It is a great club and therefore we can sort of empathise with those of you who love it so much and are perhaps a little too vigorous in your defence of your favourite venue?

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By *aucy tiggerWoman
over a year ago

Back where I belong

Glad you gave it a go, it really is the best club around xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agree with that!

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By *harliebluestockingsCouple
over a year ago

london

We actually had a good chuckle over most the msgs on this thread. Funny and informative! Isn't that what we are on here for? C&S

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

"Well,

We went along anyway! Despite all the encouragement from other posters to this thread... lol

Always been the rebellious ones!

We had a great time! Yes we did stay out of the pool and hot-tub, but that was perhaps because we were enjoying the other extensive areas far too much?

It is a great club and therefore we can sort of empathise with those of you who love it so much and are perhaps a little too vigorous in your defence of your favourite venue?

Glad you gave it a go.

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