FabSwingers.com forum: Domestic in club

By *r.Blonde OP Man
over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

Recently had a couple I started playing with and 5 mins in the guy stormed off, I stopped play removed myself from the situation saw the lady at the bar about 15 mins later asked if she was ok, man half of the couple came over like 20 seconds later wasn't happy said to his Mrs knew you would be here by him, should I of just left alone completely?

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

No easy answer, you did what you thought was right at the time. Don't overanalyse the situation

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

"No easy answer, you did what you thought was right at the time. Don't overanalyse the situation "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Very awkward situation,Did he tell you what was bothering him or did you just leave them to it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No easy answer, you did what you thought was right at the time. Don't overanalyse the situation "
this

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By *r.Blonde OP Man
over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

"Very awkward situation,Did he tell you what was bothering him or did you just leave them to it? "
just looked at each other funny during play and he stormed off, think they were removed from the club had been drinking though

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

Having been involved in clubs, the dramas I saw between couples was unbelievable

That demon drink

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By *umpleteazerWoman
over a year ago

Flintshire

"Very awkward situation,Did he tell you what was bothering him or did you just leave them to it? just looked at each other funny during play and he stormed off, think they were removed from the club had been drinking though"

I hate d*unk people in clubs. It was horrible of them to put you in that situation. I don't see what you could have done differently. As others have said, try not to over think it and forget it. Don't let it put you off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can never understand why people get d*unk in swinging clubs. Apart from it affecting performance, it's a place you do really need to.keep your wits about you, there could be all sorts of problems, like the arguments, issues of consent, etc

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By *ortheastcoupleukCouple
over a year ago

easington were the sun dont shine

seen quite a few domestics in clubs usually get sorted str8 away some ive seen empty the club

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By *r.Blonde OP Man
over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

Think it must have been the drink the week before I met them we had a good time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You did the right thing at the time. That's why it's so hard to get the right couple to play with. Add alcohol and it changes everything. The main reason why I play in clubs only. Not fun being in the middle of a couple that hasn't discussed boundaries before hand. When it works it's lots of fun tho.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Problem can be you stick up for one half of the couple against their partner and the partner you are sticking up for can turn on you.

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

Sounds like you handled it really well.

Glad I don't meet couples

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By *raceytvcdTV/TS
over a year ago

mansfield

Its the demon drink,nothing you did x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you did the right thing especially given you'd met with them before. Would you have had more misgivings if you hadn't asked?

Her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Seen a few teary angry conversations in the social areas before at clubs. Makes me sad because I often wonder if in that scenario there may be some pressure put on people. Hope not.

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By *r.Blonde OP Man
over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

Sorry been out, just wanted to know of she was ok but not sure whether that is stepping over boundaries in that situation an whether I should of just left her alone completely

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By *osieWoman
over a year ago

Wembley

I stay out of other people's business. The most I would do is to let the staff know of any concerns I may have but I won't play agony aunt

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you did the right thing in checking the lady was ok. But it's a tough call.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry been out, just wanted to know of she was ok but not sure whether that is stepping over boundaries in that situation an whether I should of just left her alone completely "

The other route would be to ask a lady staff member to go chat and assess the situation.

That said in some clubs it's the club owners having a domestic! !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By *aveandkate35Couple
over a year ago

telford

"Think it must have been the drink the week before I met them we had a good time."

You missed this nugget out in the original post. Sometimes it's the suggestion of "more to it" that can cause issues.

Some guys are terrible the go home and have sex with their partners and love to hear their partner repeat how sexy it was fucking another guy... All great.... Until they see the same guy, have a few drinks and then it could be anything - a moan, a glint in the eye... Throw in a few drinks and the paranoia sets in. Poor girl is then being accused of all sorts.... Couple that with him going off to the loo and then finding you together at the bar is the emotional equivalent of carching your wife texting a guy at work.

I'd suggest the couple needs to talk a bit more and drink a bit less.

I'd suggest you don't worry about it. Act respectfully with meets, but you can't control their dynamic.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ah yes, the old green eyed monster. You read and hear of so many men spouting BS about how they want to see their partner boned by another guy but just let it happen and they get all pissed off about it. A mate of mine keeps spouting the same shite. I offered to ream his wife and he bottled it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Recently had a couple I started playing with and 5 mins in the guy stormed off, I stopped play removed myself from the situation saw the lady at the bar about 15 mins later asked if she was ok, man half of the couple came over like 20 seconds later wasn't happy said to his Mrs knew you would be here by him, should I of just left alone completely?"
its the green eyed monster imagine its pretty common in the club scene

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some people shouldn't drink on an empty head.

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By *ushandkittyCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

Probably chavs and not the usual high class clientèle the club seeks to attract."

How can you possibly pass a comment like this? Is it only chavs that drink alcohol? Or have a disagreement with their partner?

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By *ovis69 and green eyesMan
over a year ago

valleys

"Think it must have been the drink the week before I met them we had a good time."

Maybe female told male that she fancied you or you were better than him.

The male ego may not have been able to take it.

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By *osco78Man
over a year ago

Sheffield

"Sorry been out, just wanted to know of she was ok but not sure whether that is stepping over boundaries in that situation an whether I should of just left her alone completely

The other route would be to ask a lady staff member to go chat and assess the situation.

I can think of a club I've seen this more than once!

That said in some clubs it's the club owners having a domestic! !!"

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By *ancs MinxWoman
over a year ago

Burnley

"Having been involved in clubs, the dramas I saw between couples was unbelievable

That demon drink

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I made a big mistake in playing with a lady in a club who was d*unk. I never go with anyone in vanilla life who is d*unk and same applies in clubs. She was very frosty in the morning after we shared a hotel room. She was too d*unk to drive home. Not your fault. You began to play after they'd agreed. Avoid them in future and anyone under the influence. Good luck.

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By *r.Blonde OP Man
over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

Some good advice thanks, i think you have to kind of be emotionless as a single male

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I can never understand why people get d*unk in swinging clubs. Apart from it affecting performance, it's a place you do really need to.keep your wits about you, there could be all sorts of problems, like the arguments, issues of consent, etc "

If people need alcohol to have sex with someone, surely there's something wrong.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If people need alcohol to have sex with someone, surely there's something wrong. "
yes I never drink before sex maybe one

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By *xdirtyboyxxMan
over a year ago

chorley

After years of experience at clubs you should have Left well alone

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London

"Think it must have been the drink the week before I met them we had a good time.

Maybe female told male that she fancied you or you were better than him.

The male ego may not have been able to take it."

This situation is interesting to me, as a couple, and I have to comment, even though we aren't what you might call a traditional swinging couple as we hot together on the scene and Mr is bi. I could not imagine any random single guy, even one I played with two weeks in a row (or a single anyone, male or female who either of us played with) being able to replace or outdo my partner in any way. Surely someone who thinks that they can replace one or the other partner (not to the poster above or OP specifically, but there does seem to be an underlying theme of that from some single guys) hasn't got to grips with that swinging is really about. We often play separately as well as together in clubs, but what we also have a whole life outside of the scene. So, for any couple having a domestic in a club, I would liken it to a domestic in a supermarket over what eggs to buy, I dont think it necessarily goes any deeper than that. Yes, it may indicts that boundaries have not been agreed or that both partners may not be totally ofey with the situation, but most couples would be able to iron that out, surely. Being a couple is about being grown up about dealing with such things, surely? That said, I usually quite intuitive and can see many partners in couples who clearly dont want to be there ... and are only doing it to please the other. Now I have contradicted myself entirely. A thought provoking topic, op, and as much an indication of hour own attitude towards couples as anything else ..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've seen several domestics in clubs, largely involving fuck bud couples, and largely by the female of that fb couple getting jealous because male is playing with others.

That's not to say all fb couples are like that, just from what I have personally witnessed a lot are like that

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By *angbang junkieCouple
over a year ago

Ilkeston

It doesn't *sound" like you did anything wrong. Some couples just have insecurities and just shouldn't really be in the swinging game at all.

Have seen a few men get jealous halfway through a session, never a good sign.

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By *cduck and Blue eyesCouple
over a year ago

nr chester

"Recently had a couple I started playing with and 5 mins in the guy stormed off, I stopped play removed myself from the situation saw the lady at the bar about 15 mins later asked if she was ok, man half of the couple came over like 20 seconds later wasn't happy said to his Mrs knew you would be here by him, should I of just left alone completely?"
. Hmm I remembered you from your ' couples meeting single guys thread'

If that thread is anything to go by, and it was the same couple or your general attitude towards the male of the couple, I can see why you may cause discontent, also this is your side of a story, and as we all know often the truth is not always spoken when people give their account and we never find out the other side of the story

if it's the club I am thinking it is I would also imagine that the club owners would not like the idea of the club being discussed in this way if this story is not quite as the op describes

Mrs cmy

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By *orthwest_cplCouple
over a year ago

Stretford

Got to love the little green arrow. Maybe the guy didn't like being 'zoned out' a second time?

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By *osieWoman
over a year ago

Wembley

Ah yes, now I see the problem, I should have checked that little arrow earlier

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By *cduck and Blue eyesCouple
over a year ago

nr chester

"Got to love the little green arrow. Maybe the guy didn't like being 'zoned out' a second time?"
. Ah see I remembered him from the other thread but yeah sometimes it's good to check out the green arrow as I often find things are not always what they seem

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By *cduck and Blue eyesCouple
over a year ago

nr chester

"Ah yes, now I see the problem, I should have checked that little arrow earlier"
. Yeah it's quite easy to see when reading the other thread that all maybe not what it seems

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By *ancs MinxWoman
over a year ago

Burnley

"Ah yes, now I see the problem, I should have checked that little arrow earlier"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Some good advice thanks, i think you have to kind of be emotionless as a single male"
you can only be emotionless if you are emotionless

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By *r.Blonde OP Man
over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

For your information the couple liked me a lot an were very impressed with my friendliness on there first visit an asked when I was going again to set up another meet, the other thread has no relation to this, I have just been curious ab asked for honest opinions but everyone so easily offended

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By *cduck and Blue eyesCouple
over a year ago

nr chester

"For your information the couple liked me a lot an were very impressed with my friendliness on there first visit an asked when I was going again to set up another meet, the other thread has no relation to this, I have just been curious ab asked for honest opinions but everyone so easily offended"
. Mmm well as we don't have the other side of the story then I shall reserve judgement but I will say as I know the club you attend then I shall certainly refrain from attending at the same time, as for the couple, if you truly are the lovely person you seem to make yourself out to be then surely you would respect the couple had a problem that ngt and not air it on here, after all what advice is really needed as the situation you alleged took place was clearly dealt with and you moved on

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By *angbang junkieCouple
over a year ago

Ilkeston

Don't really see the problem - he is asking for peoples thoughts, and has named neither the venue of the couple.

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By *cduck and Blue eyesCouple
over a year ago

nr chester

"Don't really see the problem - he is asking for peoples thoughts, and has named neither the venue of the couple."
. I don't have a problem as such, other than from a previous thread it would seem to me that the situation was not as innocent as the op expressed and that he possibly played a part in the male half storming off, as we don't have the _iew of the couple we will never know, as for advice it happened and is over what advice is needed, and as for not naming, well if your local to the op then you would know the club, and if your regular then you may know the couple, I just feel things that happen just happen and don't always need to be aired and to be fair after this and the previous thread I wouldn't feel comfortable attending the same nights, but no biggy as we can always check the ngts that we may attend

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By *r.Blonde OP Man
over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

"Don't really see the problem - he is asking for peoples thoughts, and has named neither the venue of the couple.. I don't have a problem as such, other than from a previous thread it would seem to me that the situation was not as innocent as the op expressed and that he possibly played a part in the male half storming off, as we don't have the _iew of the couple we will never know, as for advice it happened and is over what advice is needed, and as for not naming, well if your local to the op then you would know the club, and if your regular then you may know the couple, I just feel things that happen just happen and don't always need to be aired and to be fair after this and the previous thread I wouldn't feel comfortable attending the same nights, but no biggy as we can always check the ngts that we may attend

"
well your having a biased opinion off another thread, don't worry I wouldn't talk to you anyway

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By *cduck and Blue eyesCouple
over a year ago

nr chester

well your having a biased opinion off another thread, don't worry I wouldn't talk to you anyway"
. I think you will find I am having an informed opinion off another thread as much of what you said is my reason for making my opinion, and as you seem to attract trouble that would be my reason for not wanting to be at a club the same time as you, we are very new to this scene and only had our first club visit recently, we actually had an amazing time but if I had seen your last thread or indeed this one before going then I actually think it would have put me off going, but as I didn't then I will enjoy our next time attending but as i said I certainly won't be attending if your on the guest list

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By *angbang junkieCouple
over a year ago

Ilkeston

Read the other threads, still don't see a problem...

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By *cduck and Blue eyesCouple
over a year ago

nr chester

"Read the other threads, still don't see a problem..."
. Mmm well each to there own really, not so much of a problem as an opinion and well that's mine

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By *r.Blonde OP Man
over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

"Read the other threads, still don't see a problem..."
thank you

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By *r.Blonde OP Man
over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

well your having a biased opinion off another thread, don't worry I wouldn't talk to you anyway. I think you will find I am having an informed opinion off another thread as much of what you said is my reason for making my opinion, and as you seem to attract trouble that would be my reason for not wanting to be at a club the same time as you, we are very new to this scene and only had our first club visit recently, we actually had an amazing time but if I had seen your last thread or indeed this one before going then I actually think it would have put me off going, but as I didn't then I will enjoy our next time attending but as i said I certainly won't be attending if your on the guest list

"
complete overreaction read my verifications, never assume

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

complete overreaction read my verifications, never assume"

I think you need to block each other and move on.

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By *r.Blonde OP Man
over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

"
just humour me an pinpoint exactly what I said that was so offensive that would make you not go a club if I was there? which seems extreme

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By *ownhouseTwosomeCouple
over a year ago

Birkenhead/Liverpool

Ok, I think it's about time I said something here.

This incident happened at Townhouse and I have no problem with saying that.

I have already had a chat with the OP about his 'approach' in the club and it has been dealt with.

The couple in question weren't actually that d*unk. Yes they had been drinking but I feel that their domestic was deeper than an MMF that went sour.

The couple had a massive argument in the bar and we're asked to leave as we cannot accept that sort of behaviour on our premises.

The couple have since apologised profusely and have sorted out their differences.

Shit happens guys.

We're talking about trust, having sex with other people and emotion. The fantasy doesn't always match the reality and this can be the result.

It was dealt with on the night. Move on FFS

Thank you xx

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By *r.Blonde OP Man
over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

"Ok, I think it's about time I said something here.

This incident happened at Townhouse and I have no problem with saying that.

I have already had a chat with the OP about his 'approach' in the club and it has been dealt with.

The couple in question weren't actually that d*unk. Yes they had been drinking but I feel that their domestic was deeper than an MMF that went sour.

The couple had a massive argument in the bar and we're asked to leave as we cannot accept that sort of behaviour on our premises.

The couple have since apologised profusely and have sorted out their differences.

Shit happens guys.

We're talking about trust, having sex with other people and emotion. The fantasy doesn't always match the reality and this can be the result.

It was dealt with on the night. Move on FFS

Thank you xx "
well said, no more posts for me keep my big gob shut and opinions to myself from now on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Jealousy does not belong in swinging or in a club end of x

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