FabSwingers.com forum: Poor experience in a club

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Have you gone to a club for the first time had a poor experience and decided it was not for you?

Love to hear your thoughts

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My first experience was very very positive and have had great times since

When I meet first timers at a club I always say that they should give it at least one more go .......

What are the views of others ?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *utzzCouple
over a year ago

wrexham

We've always had great times at clubs, we always go along with the mindset of meeting people - old friends & new - and playing is a bonus not a necessity.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not at a club but at a party

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've Had some experiences at clubs that Had they been my first time I wouldn't have gone back

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've always had really positive experiences when I go to a new club, but then I've always gone with no expectations.... Even now I go with the mindset that I'm going to have a chat and meet new people, I sometimes find the ones that have a bad time are the ones that go expecting a massive free for all orgy, woman with open legs or expect to be treated like royalty because they're new, you make the night, not other people

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Our first visit to a club was disappointing not due to expectations of a sex fest as a previous poster has stated but due largely to us not knowing what to expect and what to do.

We went to Chams at Darlaston booked a room for the night dressed for the occasion and really looked forward to it.

We had several conversations with very nice people but no one seemed to know how to begin so there were lots of couples sat around all looking at other couples hoping for inspiration.

It then got worse as everyone became aware of 3 or 4 single guys who would follow and try and pounce on any couples who appeared to be going to have some fun and this would immediately kill the mood.

So this evening it was more like a social drink than a swingers club.

Luckily it didnt put us off and we have been a few more times and had great fun

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The attitude of some single guys is sometimes off putting. For some reason some feel every woman attending is there for them. Or that they need to just follow women or couples about all night to get lucky?

We are all different... Maybe some women and / or couples like that and its worked for them previously? Far better to come and say hello.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I never been a club as feel it uneasy for a single male or are they made to feel welcome im not 1 who wld follow round or think they all for me

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *not69Man
over a year ago

Lancashire

"I never been a club as feel it uneasy for a single male or are they made to feel welcome im not 1 who wld follow round or think they all for me "

As a single male, whatever club Ive been to in the North West, Ive alwsay been made to feel welcome.

if you do go to a club, treat it like your going into a new local for the first time. Dont have any expectations that your going to "get anything", just go with the mind set that your going to meet new people and make new friends, If you get to play thats a bonus. Fnd a club you like and become a regular, get your face known and when people realise your a decent guy then more doors will open for you.

Try Cupids or Amour in manchester, very friendly staff who will welcome and look after you. Also try No3 Club in Chorley, they have a social on Thursday night so new people can pop along for a look. Mary is lovely and will look after you. Or alternatively, find a lady to go with

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've Had some experiences at clubs that Had they been my first time I wouldn't have gone back "

We wnt to a club at the end of last year that was too crowded, overrun with single guys and the club didn't enforce it's own dress code. The amount of playruns was wholly inadequate for the capacity. It was a crap night and had we not known that it was the exception and not the norm for clubs we'd never have ventured back.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My first time was awful...pushy men who almost forced them self on me and Ifelt iI couldn't say no coz of where I was. I'm a regular now and would always say no and tell the staff immediately

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My first time was awful...pushy men who almost forced them self on me and Ifelt iI couldn't say no coz of where I was. I'm a regular now and would always say no and tell the staff immediately "

Yeah you need to be strong a secretive know what you want and relax then can enjoy,too d*unk hey lol x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My first visit to a club (chams) was very positive. I have been many many times since then and most have been good times although there have been a few negative vivist which would have put me off if they had been my first visit there !

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have you gone to a club for the first time had a poor experience and decided it was not for you?

Love to hear your thoughts "

A few weeks ago we tried a new club not too far from us as our local club closed down .

We won't name it here , but we won't be going back !

We love clubs but this on was everything we don't like and we couldn't get out quickly enough

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have only been to 3 clubs and all the first visits were fantastic. We have our favourite but don't discount visiting the others.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Need to defiantly give the club a second chance... Its not the club that makes it; its the people that attend... I frequent clubs regularly and my local more then any other... You never know what to expect each time you go.. And that's what i like about it... The same club offers such variety.. Would i go back somewhere If i was to have a bad experience?? Hell yes... Everything deserves a second chance

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I love clubs. My first experience was shocking but a real inspiration. Never looked back.

Had a few slow nights but you have to be proactive. I'd give it another try, or try a different club. Some are fantastic fun.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ifferent69Man
over a year ago

BRIGHTON, UK

Reading some experiences some couples have had at clubs can see why single guys get a poor rap.

Even as a single guy myself I find the aspect of following around, and not taking a hint disturbing.

Though it is a dilema.., as a couple you have someone there for moral support.The very nature of club ensures everyone, s is extra sensitive with a sense of exspectation.

Not all single guys are like that I hope but I empathise the very fact of self conciousness even if not outwardly showing they may be feeling.

Ladies you must understand equally it is not easy approaching / introducing yourself as a single guy.Especially if persons are as of a couple, even if its purely platonic

you feel your being judged even assessed.

Hounding , following and pesting is simply not acceptable.

But although we are attending as singles we do have feelings .. ...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *not69Man
over a year ago

Lancashire

"Reading some experiences some couples have had at clubs can see why single guys get a poor rap.

Even as a single guy myself I find the aspect of following around, and not taking a hint disturbing.

Though it is a dilema.., as a couple you have someone there for moral support.The very nature of club ensures everyone, s is extra sensitive with a sense of exspectation.

Not all single guys are like that I hope but I empathise the very fact of self conciousness even if not outwardly showing they may be feeling.

Ladies you must understand equally it is not easy approaching / introducing yourself as a single guy.Especially if persons are as of a couple, even if its purely platonic

you feel your being judged even assessed.

Hounding , following and pesting is simply not acceptable.

But although we are attending as singles we do have feelings .. ... "

I agree with all of that

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Went to a club on my own. A gaggle of ladies there were very unfriendly. It was clear I wasn't welcome so I left early. Not the club's fault, the staff realised what was happening and said they hoped I'd come back another time.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham

Most of my experiences going to clubs as part of a couple have been good. However, the one and only time I went as a single female, I had a disastrous experience at the hands of a nasty single bloke - if it had been my first time at a club it would've been my last. I guess you can't judge club visits in general based on a single experience.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

It's down to a combination if the venue and the clientele. Neither of which you can ever control.

A great club can be let down by it's guests - an average (or even pretty crap!) venue can make for an enjoyable night with the right company.

If people make judgements about clubs make sure which your judgement is based on. If it's the venue your best option is feedback to the club as to why you would/wouldn't return - clubs are businesses, need custom to survive and will generally be open to constructive criticism. If it's the clientele - unless there's been a specific incident involving a guest then it'll either be a case of 'the wrong night' (even good clubs have off nights!) or the customer base isn't for you.

Either way - saying nothing helps nobody. Not the club, the clientele or anyone considering that club in the future.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It's down to a combination if the venue and the clientele. Neither of which you can ever control.

A great club can be let down by it's guests - an average (or even pretty crap!) venue can make for an enjoyable night with the right company.

Either way - saying nothing helps nobody. Not the club, the clientele or anyone considering that club in the future.

Very good points but actually on the one occasion we critiqued a club via the owners we were told to go elsewhere, your not wanted at our club x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I never been a club as feel it uneasy for a single male or are they made to feel welcome im not 1 who wld follow round or think they all for me "

I agree 100% hence the reason I avoid clubs

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"It's down to a combination if the venue and the clientele. Neither of which you can ever control.

A great club can be let down by it's guests - an average (or even pretty crap!) venue can make for an enjoyable night with the right company.

Either way - saying nothing helps nobody. Not the club, the clientele or anyone considering that club in the future.

Very good points but actually on the one occasion we critiqued a club via the owners we were told to go elsewhere, your not wanted at our club x"

I'd still class that as a useful experience.

It would cement the knowledge that I'd never wish to return!

Views on clubs and experiences are very individual. We all have different tastes. But a response like that, if given to anyone giving such feedback would soon kill repeat business and would be likely to be spread via word of mouth and reviews.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hatHappensNextCouple
over a year ago

Essex, near basildon

We have only ever been to the Vanilla Alternative on couples nights and always had a great time. On our first occasion we did not play but had a great night, we never go with an expectation of playing with others and simply see how we feel as the night progresses and if there is anyone we click with

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

"Have you gone to a club for the first time had a poor experience and decided it was not for you?

Love to hear your thoughts "

We have tried a couple of clubs and while we haven't had a poor or bad experience, knew they were just not for us.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Had 1st club experience and loved it going bk again very soon

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *atelotmanMan
over a year ago

Chatham

I when to a club here in the south east a few years ago and never felt more unwelcomed in my life,the so called gate staff treated me as some sort of dirty old perv.Never got futher then the car park just turned around an left.Ive been to swingers clubs all over the world an never been spoken to like this place.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

[Removed by poster at 01/09/14 15:37:31]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

I did ... Didn't go back for 6 months and now it's one of my favourites and I go regularity!

I'm glad I took a chance and went back just to try it again.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I did ... Didn't go back for 6 months and now it's one of my favourites and I go regularity!

I'm glad I took a chance and went back just to try it again."

A very good point, anywhere can have an off night it's always worth giving somewhere a second chance x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he Queen of TartsWoman
Forum Mod
over a year ago

My Own Little World

I have been to 4 clubs and 3 I have returned to on a regular basis. The 4th I won't return to, purely because the club wasn't to my taste. A beautiful club, nice staff but I like to choose a private room on occasions which wasn't an option here. I didn't have a bad night, I just didn't have a good one.

I have never bad mouthed this club and if anyone asks about it I tell them what I have written above.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I when to a club here in the south east a few years ago and never felt more unwelcomed in my life,the so called gate staff treated me as some sort of dirty old perv.Never got futher then the car park just turned around an left.Ive been to swingers clubs all over the world an never been spoken to like this place."

In the UK we have no idea about customer service, free all your a paying customer right?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think some got o clubs as first timers with too much expectations so are disappointed , I think you should always try at least twice before you decide , weve been about 40/50 times, still undecided so another visit is on the cards hee hee

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *az_1976Man
over a year ago

Peterborough/Huntingdon

Only been twice but loved it both times

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *atelotmanMan
over a year ago

Chatham

In the UK we have no idea about customer service, free all your a paying customer right? "

Ive found a club a few miles away from the other one where I am made to feel very welcome every time I go.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We hated the first club we ever went to, it was just as I'd imagined...grubby, seedy and even though we tried, nobody would speak to us. Then, despite it apparently being a social, everyone disappeared to the play rooms. Luckily, we'd unexpectedly run into friends there and ended up having a great night back at ours...Once we'd unpeeled our feet from the sticky carpet...

Luckily, we ended up becoming friends with someone far more experienced in the club scene and she guided us to places that were much more to our taste...We gave clubs a second chance and have had some amazing times, but we won't return to the first place, ever and there have been some others that we won't be trying again...I'm glad I was persuaded to be more open minded, I imagined some kind of Dante's inferno. None have been like that. But some haven't been as clean as I like places to be.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Went to a club first time Friday after Newport social absolutely loved it! I can't wait to go again. No issue with single guys all respected my wishes and I had a great time running around the place in heels looking for adventures

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aveandkate35Couple
over a year ago

telford

No, our first night was a blast.

That being said there have been 1 or 2 nights where we've seen new couples being shown around and we've said - if this was our first night we may not have come back! Not because anything was wrong but it may have been a little quiet or too much of a single demographic etc.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andyMooCouple
over a year ago

bedford

We had a bad night at a club we visited for the first time and never went back.

To be honest it wasn't the clubs fault. I think our expectations were too high. We go regularly to a local club and never fail to have a good time. I think we expected the same from the new place. Not all clubs have the same atmosphere or facilities.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We had a bad night at a club we visited for the first time and never went back.

Every club is different with different facilities and atmosphere, sometimes if all you do us mainly go to one club where you've made lots of friends, going to another club feels very different

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread