FabSwingers.com forum: Traffic light bands at swinger clubs ? ;o) x

By *axlf079 OP Man
over a year ago

cambridge

Just a bit of research Would everyone like traffic light bands at swinger clubs ?

Green = play

Amber = maybe play

Red = social

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've a better idea...it involves making real life conversation with actual people and asking them lol...why would you need bands at all???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Could work .

Would the cost differ ?

Band given on entry if one pays online ?

But what if you change your mind later ?

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

No because people can change their minds, then some may be stuck with a social when they have decided they want more...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Awful idea, just because we go out clubbing with the intention to play doesn't mean that we'll play with anyone or at all.

As others have said, communication and talking is a far better option

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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest

I use a silver crucifix, holy water, a sharpened stake and garlic to indicate to them whether Im interested in playing or not.

Seems to work fine.

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By *axlf079 OP Man
over a year ago

cambridge

I know people who get the hump if they play at clubs that's why they prefer arranged meets, this isn't me might I add ;o) x

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By *axlf079 OP Man
over a year ago

cambridge

Lol good idea Jezebel hehe ;o) x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I use a silver crucifix, holy water, a sharpened stake and garlic to indicate to them whether Im interested in playing or not.

Seems to work fine."

Pmsl

great method!!

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham

I agree with the socialising thing - the only time I can see it as being useful is on a bi night (especially for guys) where increasing numbers of straight blokes are attending as it's cheaper. We now seem to spend a significant amount of time establishing whether guys are bi only to find yet another straight single looking for a woman to play with

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By *hole Lotta RosieWoman
over a year ago

Deviant City

I've been to a club that use bands and found that its helped some guys make conversation. They were optional to use, so dont see it as a problem.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just a bit of research Would everyone like traffic light bands at swinger clubs ?

Green = play

Amber = maybe play

Red = social

I like this idea

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Awful idea, just because we go out clubbing with the intention to play doesn't mean that we'll play with anyone or at all.

As others have said, communication and talking is a far better option"

Exactly. Just because you're wearing a green band saying that you want to play, it doesn't mean that you want to play with everyone. People seem to be losing the art of conversation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just a bit of research Would everyone like traffic light bands at swinger clubs ?

Green = play

Amber = maybe play

Red = social

Townhouse in the Wirral have these at the moment should you wish to use them

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By *aveandkate35Couple
over a year ago

telford

"I use a silver crucifix, holy water, a sharpened stake and garlic to indicate to them whether Im interested in playing or not.

Seems to work fine."

post of the week.

And no, it's a bad idea.

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By *iss-PinkWoman
over a year ago

Gloucester

I can see some merit in bands as to who you are/ what you're looking for - sometimes identifying single guys/ females isn't the easiest thing. But - with a memory like mine - I'd need colour coding guidelines in poster formats on the walls so I could decipher them lol!

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By *luemeanie69Man
over a year ago

north/south

Went to one club where they had bands indicating what they were looking for. One band was orange meaning single men aren't allowed to even talk to them or approach them. Only problem was that night there was only three couples in, all wearing orange bands, and quite a few single me. Everyone sat around no talking to anyone else (singles banned from even approaching the couples) whilst the poor music played. Terrible night.

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By *entaur_UKMan
over a year ago

Cannock

I think its a good idea, and they seem to use this system a lot in German swingers clubs from what i've heard, so it's not new. I got chatting to a German couple when i was in a swingers club in Ibiza and they told me about it. Seems to work over there so don't see why it would'nt work here in the uk.

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By *axlf079 OP Man
over a year ago

cambridge

Thanks for your input everyone all has been noted ;o) x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No good for me i am colour blind

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Better still different coloured bands for bifem couples or straight couples.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I know people who get the hump if they play at clubs that's why they prefer arranged meets, this isn't me might I add ;o) x"

I'm still trying to make sense of this particular post. Confused.I.am

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By *alphy187Man
over a year ago

cambridge

I do think it would be beneficial as I find it frustrating as a single guy not knowing if a lady who is part of a couple, MIGHT play with single guys.

I appreciate people don't like being pestered by single guys at clubs. At the moment unless we chat to them, we don't know if they are interested and could be seen as pestering them.

I feel this could improve guys reputations and make clubs nicer for all concerned.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I go to chameleons and its great coz as we all know they change colour frequently and I for 1 wouldnt like to look like a 70s disco

but I do find talking to people and I dont mean walking up to them and saying wanna play is a great way of getting a shag

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By *quirtandsprayWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham

A few of us have had said this before but to do with what type of people you are looking for ie single, couples, bi so you still have to do the chatting and social side of things to see if you like that person first

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By *ity Slickers PartiesCouple (MM)
over a year ago

Milan, Italy

A colour coded wristband does give a clear idea on what you are looking for out of the evening and can only enhance a night out at a club.

There are women who require some space from single guys and/or who do not like to be inundated with requests while at the same time there are greedy girls who specifically go to a club to meet many guys and would feel 'not attractive enough" if they were not approached by single guys so... How can you tell which is which if a woman is on her own?

From a single guy point of view there is an etiquette to respect, you are there to meet women but you do not want to appear to be the 'pushy" type and therefore a colour wristband can infact be a good icebreaker

We introduced the colour coded wristband at our parties some 4 years ago now and it works well for us, it is not compulsory but it's an additional choice we offer to differentiate girls personal preferences

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By *lackCherryCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

"Awful idea, just because we go out clubbing with the intention to play doesn't mean that we'll play with anyone or at all.

As others have said, communication and talking is a far better option"

Agreed

I'm not sure why there is a need to distil the club experience down to the nth degree now. We could never decide on a band at the start of a night as we go with the intention of having a good night and that will change as the night progresses. Lets view a club night as a social experience and not a meat market might help us all have better nights

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm on the fence with this as I think its quite a good idea especially if not compulsory, on the other hand I wouldn't want to be followed round all night by all the single guys for wearing a green band

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The trouble is I would need all three bands. For some people I would be social, some I would want to play with and some I wouldn't know until we had chatted. I'd end up getting very very confused

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like the idea of 'I am a bi woman' band and think that would work. In fact I think it should be compulsory everywhere

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've a better idea...it involves making real life conversation with actual people and asking them lol...why would you need bands at all???

Agreed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ridiculous idea in my view just another excuse for folk not to actually chat to each other bit likethe bacefook effect folk now actually talk less because if convo cant end in lol they are screwed.

Someone mentioned ettiquete and not wanting to appear pushy.

If you are not a pushy person in life then be normal folk will like or dislike.

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By *aveandkate35Couple
over a year ago

telford

Just reading this through again.....

It's still a bad idea, however if people think it's a good idea nothing stopping you doing it yourself.

The issue I see is that the people liking this idea keep saying you that you then know someone's intentions - and that's the problem. " most" people go to the club without expectation or intention of doing "x".

The same thing happens on here, people get annoyed because someone has listed say, "gangbang" in their interests but denied an offer to attend one - frustrations then kick in. It's happened to us!

I guarantee if you have a band on saying your essentially up for fun it's only a matter if time before there is a disagreement in a club where one party is saying "yeah but your up for it what's your problem?"

How many times do we see "this is supposed to be a swinging site yet no one wants to fuck me" threads. I just think to those morons this would be fuel. "This is a swingers club, you're wearing a band saying you want to play but your stood at the bar?? And don't want to fuck quazimodo?? - Dreamers!!"

We both enjoy being approached in clubs, anyone with any personal skills can soon tell if they should hang around or not.

Cheers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just a bit of research Would everyone like traffic light bands at swinger clubs ?

Green = play

Amber = maybe play

Red = social

This would appear to be a lazy way to get around club etiquette. Conversation is so underrated these days

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By *ussypussWoman
over a year ago

South Birmingham waiting for the bf to come back after crimbo

"I like the idea of 'I am a bi woman' band and think that would work. In fact I think it should be compulsory everywhere

I'm not so sure about compulsory but this wristband might be a good idea - I'd be prepared to wear one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've a better idea...it involves making real life conversation with actual people and asking them lol...why would you need bands at all???

That's our answer also.

We don't go with something specific in mind, we go to see

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just a bit of research Would everyone like traffic light bands at swinger clubs ?

Green = play

Amber = maybe play

Red = social

Have you been watching Fresh Meat again?

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By *axlf079 OP Man
over a year ago

cambridge

It's just a easier way for everyone to get what they want out of their swinger club experience but don't worry there will be no pushy people I assure you that ;o)

Thanks again everyone all input is noted ;o) x

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By *axlf079 OP Man
over a year ago

cambridge

Anymore input on traffic light bands ? ;o) x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's just a easier way for everyone to get what they want out of their swinger club experience but don't worry there will be no pushy people I assure you that ;o)

Thanks again everyone all input is noted ;o) x"

There is a party in London that uses writsbands. They claim it makes people feel safer and protects the women from pushy men. They also hark on about how exclusive their nights are...

The way to avoid pushy people is nothing to do with wristbands.

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By *axlf079 OP Man
over a year ago

cambridge

"It's just a easier way for everyone to get what they want out of their swinger club experience but don't worry there will be no pushy people I assure you that ;o)

Thanks again everyone all input is noted ;o) x

There is a party in London that uses writsbands. They claim it makes people feel safer and protects the women from pushy men. They also hark on about how exclusive their nights are...

The way to avoid pushy people is nothing to do with wristbands."

A couple who has more experience in the scene than I told me about this club after I made this thread

I thought it was a good idea because some people like the social side of the scene and won't play until they get to know the person or group more which I understand entirely ;o) x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But your missing the point, you don't need wristbands you make conversation, in addition clubs have ettiquate that people that go are made aware of. Wristbands may be an idea to show sexual orientation but the art of conversation will soon let you know if they want to play.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I use a silver crucifix, holy water, a sharpened stake and garlic to indicate to them whether Im interested in playing or not.

Seems to work fine."

Silver crucfix, Holy water, a Sharpened stake and Garlic

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By *aveandkate35Couple
over a year ago

telford

"It's just a easier way for everyone to get what they want out of their swinger club experience ...."

But that's just the point - for a lot of swingers attending clubs it's about going without any preconception of the experience they want....

I don't want to decide when I go in what I'll be doing, or at 9:00pm, or at 4:00 am....

It actually stifles free play more than it encourages it.

If it works for some - then fair enough, I, personally would struggle with it.

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By *ornybobBuilderMan
over a year ago

Sheffield

"I've a better idea...it involves making real life conversation with actual people and asking them lol...why would you need bands at all???

"
100% behind you with this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Awful idea, just because we go out clubbing with the intention to play doesn't mean that we'll play with anyone or at all.

As others have said, communication and talking is a far better option"

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By *lassyandadventurousMan
over a year ago

England and Wales

[Removed by poster at 19/02/14 19:03:16]

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By *lassyandadventurousMan
over a year ago

England and Wales

Eye contact and a nice conversation are the best ways to move things along...not forgetting a cheeky smile lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

conversation works ok even if you don't hit it off just nice to chat ,

however some band maybe useful to let you know if they are soft swing, full swap bi, fem only ect, optional of course and if you change your mind just remove it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Eye contact and a nice conversation are the best ways to move things along...not forgetting a cheeky smile lol"

Just good old fashioned people skills. I reckon you've got something there!

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By *angbang junkieCouple
over a year ago

Ilkeston

Nope. Not required, and confusing with other systems that other daft places use.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

what's wrong with good old fashion conversation ? having wristbands would cause more problems than they solved especially as there is no problem in the first place. any female with a play band would be surrounded then called a time waster if she didn't play, anyone with a social band would be told they were not real swingers and told they can go down the pub for a chat ! and so on basically all the usual things levelled at people on here but in a club. just go to a club talk to people and take it from there.

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham

The ideal of course but take a couple of situations that occurred last Monday at abfabs bi night - a guy approaches us in the lounge and starts chatting. Fine. We get along OK and after about 15 minutes, play looks like it may be on the cards. I ask if he's bi... He says 'no' very firmly with a look of horror on his face. He asks if zed is - we nod and he leaves in scalded cat mode. Same thing happened later too with another guy who wished we were into 'playing with straight guys'. We were at a bi night looking for bi men. The night ends at midnight so it would be great to be able to identify any bi men there without wasting time chatting to the straight ones who attend a bi night to chance their arm. Yes, we could start every conversation with 'are you bi?' but that does come across as a bit crass.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Exactly. Any single guy who goes to AbFab on a Monday should know it's bi night, and should also know what to expect.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

so what stops a straight guy getting a bi band but then turning down all offers for bi play in the hope some straight play will come his way ? or does he have to suck some cock in order to receive his said " bi band ". it's full of flaws for people to exploit if they chose.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you go to a club and talk to someone and it turns out they are looking for something different so what you have had a chat and possibly a laugh and even been sociable and met someone new. we went to a club and were chatting to a guy for half an hour had a really good laugh and learnt a few new things only to find out he was there to pick up his girlfriend who worked behind the bar, !!! what how dare he waste 30 mins of our lives forget the fact we have met someone new who we have spoken to a few times since and is a really nice man, he should clearly have been wearing a hi viz vest with visitor on the back so people could recognise the fact he should not be approached or spoken to as he was not there to play !!

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By *ity Slickers PartiesCouple (MM)
over a year ago

Milan, Italy

Some interesting comments in here but then again why do we go to swinger clubs for? I mean we could go to a bar to socialise, make some new friends and ask them if they are in wife swapping... is it not how it all started?

The secret of a good night out is never to expect too much and go with an open mind, but in a swinger club you are more likely to meet with likeminded people.

I cannot understand why some people associate a wristband with an anti-social behaviour when it is optional and it can give an additional information on what you are looking for out of the evening

The concept is to mingle with like-minded people and to offer an additional selection.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Some interesting comments in here but then again why do we go to swinger clubs for? I mean we could go to a bar to socialise, make some new friends and ask them if they are in wife swapping... is it not how it all started?"

Here in lies the problem for a lot of people just because you go to a swingers club doesn't mean you swap or play with others some some go to play with others, some just to socialise with like minded people and others are voyeurs and performers. like you said go with a open mind with no expectations and see what happens, if we go wanting to play and get a play band, then decide that we don't want to for whatever reason and only socialise or play for others to watch are we then time wasters ? if you go to a bar do you have to drink ? or do you have to dance at a disco ?

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By *ity Slickers PartiesCouple (MM)
over a year ago

Milan, Italy

I think we are confusing issues here. Naturally the basic rule “no” means NO still applies at all times in NSA fun, wristband or no wristband… not to mention manners and respect is paramount

I cannot comment on how some clubs are using such wristbands but can only describe from our experience that we use a colour coded wristband at the discretion of those women who for example are newbies and need introducing in the scene gradually, a PINK wristband tells those single guys “Hey take it easy with me, please give me some space, I will come to you in I want you” but also if they are only looking for Girl on Girl fun… on the other hand some women are clearly more experienced and by using a YELLOW wristband gives the message that indeed they know what they want and who are “single guys friendly” suitable for those Greedy Girls BUT this is for socialising purposes, regardless if they want to play or not!

Recently at a private party I learned the meaning of “Queen of Spades Tattoo” for those women who express their preference for black men… WOW how interesting is that? We never stop to learn something new every day. Life is great because we have choices and we should feel privileged.

The colour coded wristband we use at our parties was born thru carefully listening to our members needs and requests and it has proved to work well for us, but also single guys need to be introduced by an existing female member or a couple who attends our parties in order to avoid pollution of any sort that could spoil a party. Some of our male members have also suggested a BLUE wristband for those who are bi-sexual and we may consider applying that in the future.

Let us not forget that the basic rule – No means NO – was first introduced by the Gay scene and what a good idea this is with regards to open mindedness and respect?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I understand the whole principle of the band system and agree it does work to a degree but like anything will have its draw backs and for some it may appeal and for others it will be a deterrent. for us personally we would not wear a band and if was compulsory then would not attend the club or event, as we would find the whole thing slightly contrived and less dynamic but it's only personal preference.

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By *bony in IvoryCouple
over a year ago

Black&White Utopia

"It's just a easier way for everyone to get what they want out of their swinger club experience but don't worry there will be no pushy people I assure you that ;o)

Thanks again everyone all input is noted ;o) x

There is a party in London that uses writsbands. They claim it makes people feel safer and protects the women from pushy men. They also hark on about how exclusive their nights are...

The way to avoid pushy people is nothing to do with wristbands."
exactly!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bands are very useful.

It gives an indication of what people are looking for. There are many different people, who like many different things and have preferences.. bands help to find your type of people to play with.

BUT

That should never stop general etiquette and social interaction.

If people who are there just to play and love to play with whoever.. it works well for them to see who is playing.

For those that like to get to know people by chatting and time spent with them, to see if they like to play it works for them too.

Many time we have gone somewhere to realise we are chatting to people that just like to "get to it" when we like to talk to others and get to know them and feel a "click" before playing of any type.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's just a easier way for everyone to get what they want out of their swinger club experience but don't worry there will be no pushy people I assure you that ;o)

Thanks again everyone all input is noted ;o) x"

And how can you assure that there will be no pushy people?

I for one think conversation is only way, not silly coded wrist bands

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By *bony in IvoryCouple
over a year ago

Black&White Utopia

"what's wrong with good old fashion conversation ? having wristbands would cause more problems than they solved especially as there is no problem in the first place. any female with a play band would be surrounded then called a time waster if she didn't play, anyone with a social band would be told they were not real swingers and told they can go down the pub for a chat ! and so on basically all the usual things levelled at people on here but in a club. just go to a club talk to people and take it from there. "
totaly agree! We go to clubs because we love the whole vibe! We socialize, talk to people and play hard... When and if the mood takes us! We like the easy flow of things and being "found" by a band we wearing, would take away the build up, the flirting, etc ( which we love!) got visions off all just marching around looking at wrist bands all eve! And conversing with only those who the right colour band! Then finding out a colour not as clear cut as it seems! What about Bi? Are so many variations on that alone! Would end up needing every colour there is ... Plus a board up explaining all!! Deff not appealing to us!

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham

We wouldn't want a band system to be compulsory but in our case, if there were a 'bi man' band available then zed would probably wear it to let the straight guys who attend a bi night for reasons known only to themselves that we're a bi COUPLE not just a couple with a bi fem (which is what I think the single straight guys are hoping for).

We have no swingers club close by so Abfabs is our closest - an hour's drive away. Plus the bi night is on a Monday so we can't go often because of work. So when we DO go, we go to play. Spending 15 minutes over and over socialising with straight guys just to watch them scuttle off at the prospect of some guy on guy action is just plain frustrating.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We wouldn't want a band system to be compulsory but in our case, if there were a 'bi man' band available then zed would probably wear it to let the straight guys who attend a bi night for reasons known only to themselves that we're a bi COUPLE not just a couple with a bi fem (which is what I think the single straight guys are hoping for).

so do you have to be bi to attend a bi night ? and therefore be straight to attend a non bi night ?

how do you know these supposedly straight men are scuttling off at the thought of some mm play ? could it just be after chatting they thought you were not for them ? and a band will avoid this how ?

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By *lovisMan
over a year ago

Twickenham

I've got really thick wrists and these bands tend to cut off circulation

And for that reason - I'm out

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By *ex.IncCouple
over a year ago

Castleford

The bands are a good way to get ostracised. Some people looking to play more than likely would not waste their time with the red band wearers.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I use a silver crucifix, holy water, a sharpened stake and garlic to indicate to them whether Im interested in playing or not.

Seems to work fine."

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"The bands are a good way to get ostracised. Some people looking to play more than likely would not waste their time with the red band wearers."

and thats why it feels like this whole thread is like trying to "re-invent the wheel".... cool, lets create a solution for a issue that actually doesn't really exist.... but actually in the bigger sence creates a larger problem....

I think what this shows is how people are using talking in clubs, where is some are using conversation as a means to an end... and some are using conversation merely for the fact of conversation

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think what this shows is how people are using talking in clubs, where is some are using conversation as a means to an end... and some are using conversation merely for the fact of conversation

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham

so do you have to be bi to attend a bi night ? and therefore be straight to attend a non bi night ?

how do you know these supposedly straight men are scuttling off at the thought of some mm play ? could it just be after chatting they thought you were not for them ? and a band will avoid this how ? "

I never at any time said straight guys should not attend a bi night - but recently more and more are attending as it's cheaper for a single guy on a bi night so they go in the hope of playing with a fem. We have no problem with that. But they aren't what we're looking for and in the cases I mentioned, both guys approached US and were chatty and 'interested' UNTIL we mentioned zed was bi and we only play with bi men. One actually said 'I wish you'd play with straight guys' so it wasn't a case of the not being interested - just not interested in male bi play. We wouldn't necessarily expect other guys to wear bracelets if they were available but zed would probably wear one so straight guys wouldn't waste their and our time 'chatting us up' and flirting when nothing was ever going to come of it. It would also be useful to us to see straight away if a guy was bi - especially in a situation such as the cinema where not a lot of verbal interaction goes on before approaching. We wouldn't want to cause offence.

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By *ity Slickers PartiesCouple (MM)
over a year ago

Milan, Italy

Having said that wristbands are not compulsory BUT simply a significant preference for some people… Are you trying to say that such freedom should be denied and that everyone should be enforced the process through a few minutes conversation as if it was a speed dating in order to find out which preference suits you best? And also in the case of those girls that DO NOT want single guys should either stand on the table and shout: - Hey everybody I am not interested in single guys – OR attend couples only night?

I think that’s rather selfish.

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By *axlf079 OP Man
over a year ago

cambridge

Me personalally think its a good idea and would wear a amber band as I like to socialise but also like to play (if I'm invited to play as I like to be invited by the woman or couple to avoid any embarrassing rejection me being a non pushy gent) ;o) x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank god for the Fab Forum on what is quiet Sunday afternoon. I do giggle when people get animated over a nonsensical issue such as this post. As if any club owner would allow patrons to be preference tagged as the entered the establishment!

As I say nonsensical and a waste of every respondents time in taking the time to answer..................ooops I have answered! In that case I would go for fork iron branding on the buttocks to categorise sexual preference and intent. All the BDSM exponents can have a branding on each cheek as they would feel discriminated against!

Next!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Having said that wristbands are not compulsory BUT simply a significant preference for some people… Are you trying to say that such freedom should be denied and that everyone should be enforced the process through a few minutes conversation as if it was a speed dating in order to find out which preference suits you best? And also in the case of those girls that DO NOT want single guys should either stand on the table and shout: - Hey everybody I am not interested in single guys – OR attend couples only night?

I think that’s rather selfish.

I think your kidding yourself if you think that a band for single ladies who don't want single men will stop them being approached my men, does the preference system on here stop messages ? as for a newbie band that will just show them as "fresh meat " to certain people and a band for single bi women please , you just as well stick a unicorn horn on their head and stand back and wait for the stampede !!!

nobody said people should be denied it we were merely expressing a view point on how it would not interest the fact it works for your select parties is great but we don't think it would work everywhere but happy to be wrong.

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By *axlf079 OP Man
over a year ago

cambridge

It's not compulsory just a way to indicate what your looking for that particular night.

I no some times I come out with a load of bollocks (dont every one lol) but I genuinely think its a good idea and would not be forced upon people.

Just a fun way to indicate what people are after that particular night. ;o) x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

surely what they are looking for can be quite dynamic during the night depending on who is at the club and who they chat to ? we wouldn't go looking for a single male but are happy to chat to them and if we did chat to one and he was a really great bloke and it felt right and all parties were happy then we would play. so what band do we have ?

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By *bony in IvoryCouple
over a year ago

Black&White Utopia

"surely what they are looking for can be quite dynamic during the night depending on who is at the club and who they chat to ? we wouldn't go looking for a single male but are happy to chat to them and if we did chat to one and he was a really great bloke and it felt right and all parties were happy then we would play. so what band do we have ? "

exactly! The variations are huge! and depend on individuals, mood etc... We prefer to go with the flow and see where the eve takes us

open minded and obligation free!

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By *axlf079 OP Man
over a year ago

cambridge

Think you would wear a amber band too but you don't have to wear them if you don't want too it's only fun at the end of the day if your not comfortable wearing a band you don't have to you can go with the flow if you want too ;o) x

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

I think that’s rather selfish.

and just because I am chatting to someone, it:

a) doesnt mean I am doing it because I want to jump their bones...

b) would be rather sad if someone thought I was doing it in order to get into knickers...

two different mindsets going on.... your actual intention, and your percieved intention...

I'll chat to anyone... there is no M.O if I go up to anyone and say hi.. I just want to know they are okay.... it doesn't have to be the most in-depth conversation, for example, people are new and it is okay to say "hey we know what its like, we were all new once!"

and because we are now over-analysing conversation, and bringing a more paranoid and cynical element to it.. you are talking some of the innocence out of it....

I would hate to think I couldn't talk to someone merely because they have some sort of band on... because most conversations in clubs are not sexual at all!!

I don't think "ooh... right band for me... i'm in there!!!".... and you would still TALK to people anyway...

what the band in effect does is it says to people "if you aren't our type... then any convesation is wasted conversation! "

sad message to send

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By *axlf079 OP Man
over a year ago

cambridge

exactly! The variations are huge! and depend on individuals, mood etc... We prefer to go with the flow and see where the eve takes us

open minded and obligation free! "

Think everyone should go to a club with a open mind and no expectations that way you will be happy if you played or not sometimes its good just to make new friends ;o) x

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By *bony in IvoryCouple
over a year ago

Black&White Utopia

[Removed by poster at 23/02/14 16:04:23]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's not compulsory just a way to indicate what your looking for that particular night.

I no some times I come out with a load of bollocks (dont every one lol) but I genuinely think its a good idea and would not be forced upon people.

Just a fun way to indicate what people are after that particular night. ;o) x

Out of interest what clubs have you been too that you feel this system would enhance the experience for attendees?

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By *bony in IvoryCouple
over a year ago

Black&White Utopia

I think that’s rather selfish.

and just because I am chatting to someone, it:

a) doesnt mean I am doing it because I want to jump their bones...

b) would be rather sad if someone thought I was doing it in order to get into knickers...

two different mindsets going on.... your actual intention, and your percieved intention...

and because we are now over-analysing conversation, and bringing a more paranoid and cynical element to it.. you are talking some of the innocence out of it....

I would hate to think I couldn't talk to someone merely because they have some sort of band on... because most conversations in clubs are not sexual at all!!

I don't think "ooh... right band for me... i'm in there!!!".... and you would still TALK to people anyway...

what the band in effect does is it says to people "if you aren't our type... then any convesation is wasted conversation! "

sad message to send

"
totaly Agree

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By *bony in IvoryCouple
over a year ago

Black&White Utopia

exactly! The variations are huge! and depend on individuals, mood etc... We prefer to go with the flow and see where the eve takes us

open minded and obligation free!

Think everyone should go to a club with a open mind and no expectations that way you will be happy if you played or not sometimes its good just to make new friends ;o) x"
yeap! And wrist bands would not be worn by us... At all! Lol

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By *axlf079 OP Man
over a year ago

cambridge

"It's not compulsory just a way to indicate what your looking for that particular night.

I no some times I come out with a load of bollocks (dont every one lol) but I genuinely think its a good idea and would not be forced upon people.

Just a fun way to indicate what people are after that particular night. ;o) x

Out of interest what clubs have you been too that you feel this system would enhance the experience for attendees?"

I just thought It would be a good idea to indicate what people are after that night

Try look at it in a positive way a positive mind always helps ;o) x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's not compulsory just a way to indicate what your looking for that particular night.

I no some times I come out with a load of bollocks (dont every one lol) but I genuinely think its a good idea and would not be forced upon people.

Just a fun way to indicate what people are after that particular night. ;o) x

Out of interest what clubs have you been too that you feel this system would enhance the experience for attendees?

I just thought It would be a good idea to indicate what people are after that night

Try look at it in a positive way a positive mind always helps ;o) x"

to look at it in a positive light surely there must be something positive In the proposal ?

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By *axlf079 OP Man
over a year ago

cambridge

"It's not compulsory just a way to indicate what your looking for that particular night.

I no some times I come out with a load of bollocks (dont every one lol) but I genuinely think its a good idea and would not be forced upon people.

Just a fun way to indicate what people are after that particular night. ;o) x

Out of interest what clubs have you been too that you feel this system would enhance the experience for attendees?

I just thought It would be a good idea to indicate what people are after that night

Try look at it in a positive way a positive mind always helps ;o) x

to look at it in a positive light surely there must be something positive In the proposal ?

Might look cool in the dark room lol ;o) x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

but when we arrived we were looking to play with couples and fems not single men , so we chose a band to reflect this the outstanding man then chose not to talk to us because of our band choice and the upshot being we didn't get the amazing experience it could have been !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's not compulsory just a way to indicate what your looking for that particular night.

I no some times I come out with a load of bollocks (dont every one lol) but I genuinely think its a good idea and would not be forced upon people.

Just a fun way to indicate what people are after that particular night. ;o) x

Out of interest what clubs have you been too that you feel this system would enhance the experience for attendees?

I just thought It would be a good idea to indicate what people are after that night

Try look at it in a positive way a positive mind always helps ;o) x"

You are trying to fix something that isn't broken. And judging by that response isn't something you've not even got first hand experience of.

I've been to six different swinging clubs and a fair few fet clubs with couples rooms and have never felt that any of them needed something like this in place.

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By *axlf079 OP Man
over a year ago

cambridge

"It's not compulsory just a way to indicate what your looking for that particular night.

I no some times I come out with a load of bollocks (dont every one lol) but I genuinely think its a good idea and would not be forced upon people.

Just a fun way to indicate what people are after that particular night. ;o) x

Out of interest what clubs have you been too that you feel this system would enhance the experience for attendees?

I just thought It would be a good idea to indicate what people are after that night

Try look at it in a positive way a positive mind always helps ;o) x

You are trying to fix something that isn't broken. And judging by that response isn't something you've not even got first hand experience of.

I've been to six different swinging clubs and a fair few fet clubs with couples rooms and have never felt that any of them needed something like this in place."

Sorry but you just seem really negative about everything I have to say on these forums I'm not trying to fix anything just trying to create some thing new (well not so new) and exciting.

Guess negative minds will always put some down aye

When ever I meet negative people in person I always try and change their mindset as it can't be good having a negative way of thinking and always putting people down I believe in treat people how you would like to be treated ;o) x