FabSwingers.com forum: Wristband scheme

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I've heard of clubs having coloured wristbands to identify what they are looking for. What are people's views on this? How does it work in your club? Does it help or hinder?

My club has just started using 4 different coloured bands.

Red - social only/not playing

Yellow - soft swap/looking for female

Green - full play/couples

Pink - looking for men

I remember them now but couldn't remember last night! I suppose it was a good talking point. But not many seemed to participate...

Is there any other ideas like this that clubs have?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

think this will stop a lot of social interaction tbh..

we go with the flow in a club so may spend half the night swapping wristbands

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've heard of clubs having coloured wristbands to identify what they are looking for. What are people's views on this? How does it work in your club? Does it help or hinder?

My club has just started using 4 different coloured bands.

Red - social only/not playing

Yellow - soft swap/looking for female

Green - full play/couples

Pink - looking for men

I remember them now but couldn't remember last night! I suppose it was a good talking point. But not many seemed to participate...

Is there any other ideas like this that clubs have?"

I think it would run the risk of limiting your options or giving the idea that certain things are a requirement or compulsory rather like people see the preferences and interests on here...

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By *r OreoMan
over a year ago

Croydon

some might well walk past looking like a christmas tree if they arent sure what they want from the night!

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By *uietlykinkymeWoman
over a year ago

kinky land

I'd be a christmas tree, as I go and see, I dont go with expectations or a 'to do list'

Actually If I was told I had to decide on entry I'd leave

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"some might well walk past looking like a christmas tree if they arent sure what they want from the night!"

Lol!

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By *otlovefun42Couple
over a year ago

Costa Blanca Spain...

These wristbands are very common in German clubs, and the meaning of the colours can vary from club to club. So much so that one night we both wore green which usually means (as in green light) open to pretty much everything. At this club though it meant (as in greenhorn) that we were first timers.

We soon realised our mistake and changed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They need on for..."Up for anything"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Prior to my first visit to a swingers event...last year, I'd decided I would simply watch from afar..

That intention lasted about an hour before a very beautiful lady (i was seriously punching above my weight that night!!) convinced that I, alongside her husband, will be her plaything for the night.

Had I worn a 'watching only' wristband...I would never have experienced the most sensual snog and a spanking of a lifetime!! X

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By *ownhouseTwosomeCouple
over a year ago

Birkenhead/Liverpool

The wristband scheme is working really well at Townhouse. It is not compulsory at all but people like to wear the bands as a bit of fun

For those who are 'up for anything' they where all the colours!! haha...they are very colourful! It's been a great talking point and a brilliant ice breaker! So for those who don't fancy wearing a band then that's fine, but those who want a giggle then they take one..or more! One guy was wearing one as a cock ring the other night!!! hahahaha

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

It seems the wristbands could have benefits and complications, but as it's not compulsory then it could be a great success. Those couples who don't want any unwanted attention can chose they're wristband.

I'm still curious as to other schemes in clubs too....

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By *ity Slickers PartiesCouple (MM)
over a year ago

Brighton & Hove

We have been using two colour coded wristbands since we started promoting parties to safeguard and/or encourage more girls to attend our parties:

PINK: Girls make the rules and only Girls break the rules focusing on those newbies or even girls who are only seeking for girl on girl fun so Guys are not even allowed to approach them ar all.

YELLOW: Girls who are experienced in the scene, know what they want and/or are at the party specifically to meet guys (suit those greedy girls)

Of course girls can decide to be neutral and players will have to find out but in any case NO means 'no' and women are always in charge which seems to work well for us.

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham

The only wristbands we'd be interested in would be a coloured one that denoted the guy was bi. Even on a bi night it's not easy to ascertain if the male half of a couple (or even a single guy) is up for some fun without the direct approach of 'are you bi?' (which we do but it's a bit of a passion killer).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agreed, wish we had some sort of wristband/colour scheme on fab to help with that very same search.

"The only wristbands we'd be interested in would be a coloured one that denoted the guy was bi. Even on a bi night it's not easy to ascertain if the male half of a couple (or even a single guy) is up for some fun without the direct approach of 'are you bi?' (which we do but it's a bit of a passion killer)."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What if you want to soft swing with a bi man?

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

"What if you want to soft swing with a bi man?"

Oooh watching men snog, yummy!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The wristband scheme is working really well at Townhouse. It is not compulsory at all but people like to wear the bands as a bit of fun

Sounds like a good idea, something that we had considered before as a good idea. Good to know how it was received. Thanks

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By *ity Slickers PartiesCouple (MM)
over a year ago

Brighton & Hove

Yes funny you say so but we have had a few requests for bi men too and are considering to introduce a BLUE wristband for men.

I have always encouraged or assumed our parties for straight men while most women who frequent our parties are almost all bisexual

The main purpose of the differentiation of a wristband for women was specifically created to give some space to those newbies who could easily feel suffocated by single guys and to allow those Greedy Girls not to feel ignored which is indeed an embarrassing position to be for single guys at the beginning of the party and the coded wristband is a good icebreaker

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Terrible idea. I ended up in a club on Saturday night, but my aims and intentions changed during the course of the night. I'd also want it to be more stylish than something that looks like it belongs at the municipal swimming baths.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You should be able to get a job lot of yellow one now that Armstrong has been found out lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I think that no matter what wristband colour your wearing, if you decide to wear it, it shouldn't kill the social conversation. If I'm sat next to anyone ant the bar, be it a single or couple, I'd still say hi and have a chat.

I think it does make a good conversation starter and intentions clearer. If you change your mind, change your wristband.

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By *ity Slickers PartiesCouple (MM)
over a year ago

Brighton & Hove

I could not agree with you more, however as a party organizer while giving the option to welcome selected single guys, it can be rather embarrassing situation, for example:

a) a single girl is on her own and guy goes and talk to her and she points out that she is quite happy on her own for the time being. The guys politely moves on but the single girl she is on her own again... after 3 or 4 attempts if she is not experienced in the scene she might feel pressurized...

b) on the other hand if a guy is too polite and does not go to socialize with the right type of women i.e. Greedy Girls, they might get offended: - Why nobody is not coming to talk to me? - and might think they are not attractive enough...

A colour coded wristband can be just the answer to the problem

At our parties we also have "under cover" security, a man and a woman who, by being involved with the party also keep a closer eye and make sure that the wristband code is respected.

We introduced the wristband some 3 years ago and we have noticed that other clubs are now using it too

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"I think that no matter what wristband colour your wearing, if you decide to wear it, it shouldn't kill the social conversation. If I'm sat next to anyone ant the bar, be it a single or couple, I'd still say hi and have a chat.

I think it does make a good conversation starter and intentions clearer. If you change your mind, change your wristband. "

I actually think the exact opposite... to be honest I would refuse to wear it.

if people want to find out what I may or may not be after, there is a really simple way of finding out... they can come over to me, have a conversation and ask...

I think it will stilt conversation by pigeon-holing people...

I'll say hello and chat to anyone in a club, because there is no alterior motive to it.. and putting a wristband into that could make it look that way...

when I go to a club I go to meet nice people and chat with nice people, be that male, female, couples ect...

I think too many people overthink and overanalyse, and in a club which is suppose to be an all encompassing , you are splitting people apart as soon as you enter..

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By *uietlykinkymeWoman
over a year ago

kinky land

I think it does make a good conversation starter and intentions clearer. If you change your mind, change your wristband.

I actually think the exact opposite... to be honest I would refuse to wear it.

if people want to find out what I may or may not be after, there is a really simple way of finding out... they can come over to me, have a conversation and ask...

I think it will stilt conversation by pigeon-holing people...

I'll say hello and chat to anyone in a club, because there is no alterior motive to it.. and putting a wristband into that could make it look that way...

when I go to a club I go to meet nice people and chat with nice people, be that male, female, couples ect...

I think too many people overthink and overanalyse, and in a club which is suppose to be an all encompassing , you are splitting people apart as soon as you enter.."

Looks like you, tina & i would be better off elsewhere

Any club using this idea will not be one i visit.

Swinging for me is social & if it goes well sexual.

I see this as distracting from the normal chats & social interaction so its definitely not for me at all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

there seems to be pros and cons on this subject , maybe a band scheme could be optional for thos who want it,

we get loads of guys follow us in clubs and can spend time saying no thanks, we don't mind chatting to anyone but if you chat to some guys they automaticly think your up for more and follow you expecting more,the bands would let them know from the start,

also were not the best at reading people so a hint of whos looking for what may help us too

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By *ity Slickers PartiesCouple (MM)
over a year ago

Brighton & Hove

I think it does make a good conversation starter and intentions clearer. If you change your mind, change your wristband.

I actually think the exact opposite... to be honest I would refuse to wear it.

if people want to find out what I may or may not be after, there is a really simple way of finding out... they can come over to me, have a conversation and ask...

I think it will stilt conversation by pigeon-holing people...

I'll say hello and chat to anyone in a club, because there is no alterior motive to it.. and putting a wristband into that could make it look that way...

when I go to a club I go to meet nice people and chat with nice people, be that male, female, couples ect...

I think too many people overthink and overanalyse, and in a club which is suppose to be an all encompassing , you are splitting people apart as soon as you enter.."

OK but you are a guy, the wristband is supposed to protect the girls as we want to encourage the female attendance to a party whether beginners, experienced and/or needing introducing gradually, not everyone is the same!

For example the first few hours at a party it’s very important to socialise, there are indeed newbies or girls who may want to play with other girls only, but could equally be so sexy and play a major part in warming up the atmosphere of the party and why should they be pushed away? On the other hand there are well experienced women and/or Greedy Girls who are there because they want to meet as many guys as possible in very little time

not to mention those cuckold couples who want to see their wife be used and abused so... how would you differentiate?

Of course there is the option to be neutral if you so wish and people will have to find out, but at our parties the wristband is supposed to give some space to those girls who prefer to be on their own yet attend a party of adult nature.

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By *uietlykinkymeWoman
over a year ago

kinky land

Wow & 'women' buy that

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By *ity Slickers PartiesCouple (MM)
over a year ago

Brighton & Hove

"Wow & 'women' buy that

Yes we have had an increase of single girls coming on their own as young as 18 and even on their early 20's who are tempted to deep their toes in the water rather than pressured to and discourage from attending again... we get girls dancing wearing very little clothes and who enjoy feeling sexy without being jumped on which is a great addition to a party. Why should they not be free to do as they wish and be the one to chose the guys?

Naturally more experience women know what they want and are well capable to look after themselves but not everyone is the same.

Well it works for us anyway

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

protect women from what... you make it sound like men are preditory creatures... oh quick... lets jump the newbies!! fresh meat!!!

if that is the case of the men that go to your parties, then I am really tempted to say pick the guys at your parties better.....

I know that if my local club saw guys doing that, they would be out sharpish

not to mention those cuckold couples who want to see their wife be used and abused so... how would you differentiate?"

simple... talking! you are making it all a lot more complicated than it needs to be.... different bands for every single piegon hole you can imagine...

so can I have one for being black, one for being straight, one for being a big hefty dude, one for being a hippy and driving an electric car, one for drinking non-alcoholic beer and cider in clubs... and on and on and on...

see... I would find that out in the natural flow of a conversation... but it seems the difference is I dont see chatting to someone who may be looking for something different from me as wasted conversation.... and that is why I think you are in effect playing into that generalisation by using the example above

the object of chatting to me is to be sociable, I know I am going to have a good night regardless for meeting new people and old friends.. not using it as step 1 of some sort of mission

any good club will keep an eye on newbies... and any good club goer will know when to give people a bit of space... but for me sitting in a corner by yourselves as a single or a couple makes you stand out even more.... sometimes a simple "hello" is the most friendly thing you can do.... because we were all new once....

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By *uietlykinkymeWoman
over a year ago

kinky land

"Wow & 'women' buy that

Naturally more experience women know what they want and are well capable to look after themselves but not everyone is the same.

Well it works for us anyway

good for you, but Fabio has a point, a very very valid point.

So I wont be attending your parties.

People men/women/couples in this scene need to be confident and honest about what they are looking for, mature in a word. I like my playmates mature, and confident.

I'll gloss over the 18 year old girls thing

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By *hatHappensNextCouple
over a year ago

Essex, near basildon

We would not like this as not sure what we fancy when we go to a club, just like to see how things work out and take it from there

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By *oodies4GirlsCouple (FF)
over a year ago

Carshalton Beeches

Funny that those who pro lame to be confident and mature women seems to hide themselves in a profile with no public photos!!!

Console yourselves (both of you) for you have to be invited to attend our parties

Do think also to those women who are only interested in Girl on Girl fun for example, would they have to waste their evening out to explain to every Tom, Dick and Harry that they are not interested in guys?

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By *hatHappensNextCouple
over a year ago

Essex, near basildon

Sorry, was that a comment on us or a general one, not used to these forums x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've heard of clubs having coloured wristbands to identify what they are looking for. What are people's views on this? How does it work in your club? Does it help or hinder?

My club has just started using 4 different coloured bands.

Red - social only/not playing

Yellow - soft swap/looking for female

Green - full play/couples

Pink - looking for men

I remember them now but couldn't remember last night! I suppose it was a good talking point. But not many seemed to participate...

Is there any other ideas like this that clubs have?"

I initially thought great idea... But then I thought you may go only wanting to do this, this or this... Then once there change yr mind.

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By *hatHappensNextCouple
over a year ago

Essex, near basildon

Exactly, that's how we fewl

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By *oodies4GirlsCouple (FF)
over a year ago

Carshalton Beeches

"Sorry, was that a comment on us or a general one, not used to these forums x"

Apologies it was a comment to Angel Pants and her friend Fabio which I thought evident.

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By *hatHappensNextCouple
over a year ago

Essex, near basildon

Sorry, just rubbish at forum threads, and wine of course lol

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By *oodies4GirlsCouple (FF)
over a year ago

Carshalton Beeches

"Sorry, just rubbish at forum threads, and wine of course lol"

That's quite allright sweetie

my point is simply that I am not interested in guys as I have a husband who allows me to play with girls

Occasionally I attend to City Slickers Parties wear a Pink Wristband and I can happlily waive it in the air to show that I am only interested in girls and that guys respect that.

I am sick and tired to explain to every bloke the reason why and trying to be introduce to something different instead. I can assure you that I know what I want.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

i just think its interesting to see how "friends" of people come in to defend their pals without actallly engaging in the conversation.....

i thought the whole point of a forum was that not everyone was going to agree with people.... rather than just going in for personal attacks......

it just looks petty.....

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By *anSusieCouple
over a year ago

Midlothian

i think it would be a good idea to wear a wrist band to denote whether you are Bi or straight. Very often when I ask a man if he is Bi or straight, before we will play with him, I get the answer of...depends or both

How can you be both?? ...My answer is....if you have to think about it then you are Bi and NO we will not play with you!!

Wrist bands will stop all this pissing about! (Dan)

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By *hatHappensNextCouple
over a year ago

Essex, near basildon

Controversial here but was the essence of swinging not about couples?

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By *oodies4GirlsCouple (FF)
over a year ago

Carshalton Beeches

"i just think its interesting to see how "friends" of people come in to defend their pals without actallly engaging in the conversation.....

i thought the whole point of a forum was that not everyone was going to agree with people.... rather than just going in for personal attacks......

it just looks petty....."

I am engaging in a conversation

Fabswingers allows profiles to block single guys. Well if I have to chose a party where I feel safe I much prefer to have the choice to wear a Pink Wristband at City Slickers if you do not mind.

It doesn't look petty when your friends support you views does it?

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

The way I see it is that before started being mute and just apparently waving wristbands people actually talked.... And in most clubs they still use this radical talking concept

So it is as if people are trying to reinvent the wheel.... Creating a solution for an issue which isn't really existent to the point for most good clubs...

If people in one club are talking to people in a club for the sake of talking... And in the other club people are waving wristbands... I could take a wild guess at which ppl would say is the more socialable...

In using the beloved bands... You do take out an element of that social factor, you are not talking to people as much for the conversation but for the purpose of getting you closer to some goal

And it is the really socialable ppl who may object the most

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By *oodies4GirlsCouple (FF)
over a year ago

Carshalton Beeches

"The way I see it is that before started being mute and just apparently waving wristbands people actually talked.... And in most clubs they still use this radical talking concept

So it is as if people are trying to reinvent the wheel.... Creating a solution for an issue which isn't really existent to the point for most good clubs...

In using the beloved bands... You do take out an element of that social factor, you are not talking to people as much for the conversation but for the purpose of getting you closer to some goal

And it is the really socialable ppl who may object the most"

But some women do not want to talk to you can you not appreciate that and respect othe point of view or its all about you?

Thinking about reinventing the wheel swinging was for wifes swapping and yes specifically designed for couples only...

Now that should cut you out straight away or are things changing and if they are what's wrong in accomodating some rules to please most people?

Perhaps we should all ask Fsbio's opinion or are we not in a democratic country?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is all this redundant if you are colour blind??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We have been using two colour coded wristbands since we started promoting parties to safeguard and/or encourage more girls to attend our parties:

PINK: Girls make the rules and only Girls break the rules focusing on those newbies or even girls who are only seeking for girl on girl fun so Guys are not even allowed to approach them ar all.

YELLOW: Girls who are experienced in the scene, know what they want and/or are at the party specifically to meet guys (suit those greedy girls)

Of course girls can decide to be neutral and players will have to find out but in any case NO means 'no' and women are always in charge which seems to work well for us."

Not that I will be attending any clubs but I like to read the different forum subjects. So pink means girl is in charge of what happens but guys are not allowed to approach or speak to her?

If you are a newbie to it, then I would want some conversation with people so is there a colour for that, indicating you would like to chat but not go further as you were seeing what it was like?

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By *oodies4GirlsCouple (FF)
over a year ago

Carshalton Beeches

"Is all this redundant if you are colour blind??

Love it! That would get you full marks at a party

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

Perhaps we should all ask Fsbio's opinion or are we not in a democratic country?"

Funny enough the thing about a democracy is that you are allowed differing opinions...

The funny thing is the difference between a democracy and a dictatorship...

One you get attacked for having a differing opinion... The other you get to explain the differing opinion

Up until someone lit the fuse it was and interesting conversation with viewpoints on both sides

Do I think you owe the lady you irrationally attacked an apology... Yep

Do I think they will get one....

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By *oodies4GirlsCouple (FF)
over a year ago

Carshalton Beeches

"We have been using two colour coded wristbands since we started promoting parties to safeguard and/or encourage more girls to attend our parties:

PINK: Girls make the rules and only Girls break the rules focusing on those newbies or even girls who are only seeking for girl on girl fun so Guys are not even allowed to approach them ar all.

YELLOW: Girls who are experienced in the scene, know what they want and/or are at the party specifically to meet guys (suit those greedy girls)

Of course girls can decide to be neutral and players will have to find out but in any case NO means 'no' and women are always in charge which seems to work well for us.

Not that I will be attending any clubs but I like to read the different forum subjects. So pink means girl is in charge of what happens but guys are not allowed to approach or speak to her?

If you are a newbie to it, then I would want some conversation with people so is there a colour for that, indicating you would like to chat but not go further as you were seeing what it was like?

First of all it is not compulsory but a choice providing a safer environment for women

In principle girls wearing a Pink Wristband should benefit from some space and they should make the first move choosing the guy they wish to speak to. At times it can be suffocating if you are a sexy girl and attending a party of this kind for the first time and you could be easily put off the scene altogether.

This kind of protection it does not mean I am unsociable, but rather take it easy with me I am a beginner

It is a fact that because some women feel safer, given some space the happen to be much naughtier than those well experienced and more often they end up doing things they never dreamed of...

Such system may not agree with everyone but than again there is so much choice of clubs and private parties to go to... Happy Days is all I can say.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is all this redundant if you are colour blind??

Love it! That would get you full marks at a party

I had to scroll through the lot to make sure my smartypants remark would hit the spot!

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By *oodies4GirlsCouple (FF)
over a year ago

Carshalton Beeches

"Is all this redundant if you are colour blind??

Love it! That would get you full marks at a party

I had to scroll through the lot to make sure my smartypants remark would hit the spot!"

It comes as no surprise that charming people like you are most welcome at City Slickers

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By *oodies4GirlsCouple (FF)
over a year ago

Carshalton Beeches

Perhaps we should all ask Fsbio's opinion or are we not in a democratic country?

Funny enough the thing about a democracy is that you are allowed differing opinions...

The funny thing is the difference between a democracy and a dictatorship...

One you get attacked for having a differing opinion... The other you get to explain the differing opinion

Up until someone lit the fuse it was and interesting conversation with viewpoints on both sides

Do I think you owe the lady you irrationally attacked an apology... Yep

Do I think they will get one...."

And for what? For being so confident to the point that she cannot even show how sexy she looks in her public photos or for having supported your point of view?

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By *uietlykinkymeWoman
over a year ago

kinky land

As a single mum of 3 i show those i want my face pics.

I make no apologies for that.

I also attend clubs & my veris show that.

Do i want my village labelling my children or myself no i do not.

Am i antisocial no. Its MY profile. I do fine thanks, despite having never met _abio.

As i said the whole theory goes against basic swinging & manners in swinging.

When people don't have to talk to each other or believe swinging is full of 18 year old pole dancing girls with no fear!!

I can see the threads now

This site allows many things; its a social interaction site but using the forums to get round a block & complain about my lack of pics

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There are good reasons argued here for and against wristbands.

I can see the point that it can kill the art of socialising.

I can also see that it can make people, especially newbies, feel a bit more secure by keeping away unwanted attention.

At the end of the day the wristbands are purely optional and guests are expected to respect the scheme. But it hasn't killed conversation in our club. People still chat and say hi!