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Definitive Club Etiquette

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By *tasia OP   Couple
over a year ago

West Bromwich

We’d like to post a newcomers guide to “Club Etiquette” on our walls to assist newcomers within the club scene.

What points do you think should be covered and how should they be worded?

Help appreciated in advance.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No means No!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Id rather know all first timers had been spoken to rather than left to read something.

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By *iss kitty glosWoman
over a year ago

gloucester

When single guys approach a couple don't just speak to the female half !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All First timers to a club, whether single male, single female or couples, make the effort to chat to other people, don't just sit in a corner/stand at the bar and expect everyone to come to you. You only get back the effort that you put in!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Id rather know all first timers had been spoken to rather than left to read something. "

But it's also good to give those that do bother to read before going to a club for the first time a good and informed guide to etiquette in clubs, as well as being told the same whilst being given a tour of the club on thier first visit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Id rather know all first timers had been spoken to rather than left to read something. "

Theres nothing saying they wont be spoken to as well, its something a little extra to give them an idea about clubs and what to expect etc

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By *oubleDsCouple
over a year ago

Manchester

tell sngle guys the ladies toilets are for ladies only.we were in a mcr club on friday night mrs d walked into the ladies to find an ethnic guy peeing in there claimed he didnt understand lol thats after he was given the tour and after i (mr d) caught him peering round the door 10 minutes earlier and told him he was out of order.

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By *ub bbwWoman
over a year ago

oldbury

respect boundaries and limits, dont folow people aimlessly around wiggling your tackle or fumbling when just saying hello to people, Check before trying to jump in to a group situation that you are welcome And most people play safely so dont just jump in bareback to some one who is possibly a little preoccupied (we witnessed this in a club in the last week a guy started pounding away in to a girl who was a little busy and when she asked if he had any protection he said no and she went mental on him rightly so )

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By *kmale421Man
over a year ago

wirral

Speaking from personal experience of Xtasia, and from speaking to a lady friend of mine who lives in USA it seems the issues of making contact with each other is often fraught with difficulties.

For example, I've often tried to make conversation with people around the bar area at Xtasia and while sometimes successful, it can be difficult to get a couple to engage in a conversation. My friend in the states has said that she and her hubby have often spotted a guy they want to play with but she's been waiting for him to make the approach. Funnily enough, it's so often drummed into single guys heads not to make a false move at a club, an unwelcome approach etc., that speaking as a single guy whom does like to play, your often waiting for a clear sign or invitation from a couple/lady for the person or group to join in.

Having a slightly radical thought for a second, I think that clubs could do more to break the ice to help people feel included. A club will often put a party on but then leave everyone to their own devises. Now while it wouldn't suit everyone, finding a few things that would involve people early on in the evening such as party games, forfeits or maybe even a version of speed dating (Speed swinging perhaps)could work and break down peoples natural inhibitions

I've copied this off the No 3 clubs website but in essence while you may wish to change a few things I'd say it gives a pretty good idea to any first timer.

First Time Visitors

If you are a couple it is helpful if you and your partner discuss your limits or intentions. If you have just come to watch or for atmosphere that is fine. If you are approached a polite "No" will see that you are left alone.

If you are a couple looking for another couple, it is quite normal for you to sit and chat to other couples and during conversation, mention your interests or visit the "Couples Only" Room.

If you are a couple and are looking for a single to join you, then this is the easiest scenario. Single guys are most eager to oblige and not offended in the least if you approach them.

If you are approached by a single, he will not get right to the point, but will normally engage you in small talk conversation, but you can rest assured he is interested in joining you. If you are interested, ask him if he would like to join you in a private room.

Serious swingers can have the time of their lives in our club. Just enter the open rooms for serious attention from anyone in there, but most will not begin until they get the indication that you require their attention.

Looking for bi ladies? lots of couples have bi ladies looking for the same, just mention in conversation that the lady in your partnership is bi and is looking for the same.

Couples who come for the first time who just sit and expect to be approached without any input from yourselves may not enjoy their night, as regulars do not know what you are into; also they do not like to offend. The best approach is to give eye contact or make the effort to chat to others. It is normal to sit next to other people and introduce yourself, starting with with normal everyday conversation. If you find that they are regulars, ask them questions about the club and the best way to go about things, you will find them eager to help guide you in the right direction.

In a nutshell, be friendly, polite and things will happen as everyone in the club are open-minded and are there to swing. Whatever their preferences, just relax and enjoy your evening.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"tell sngle guys the ladies toilets are for ladies only.we were in a mcr club on friday night mrs d walked into the ladies to find an ethnic guy peeing in there claimed he didnt understand lol thats after he was given the tour and after i (mr d) caught him peering round the door 10 minutes earlier and told him he was out of order."

I fail to see why you need to comment on his ethnicty?

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By *occosboysCouple (MM)
over a year ago

Manchester


"When single guys approach a couple don't just speak to the female half ! "

At a Greedy Girl Club event that a fem had invited me too I thought I'd go and chat to a couple sitting on the sidelines..

"Can't you see we're having a private conversation" barked the man...

Thing is they hadn't said a word for ages...

Club etiquette lessons for couples maybe....

TBH I didn't really give a toss BUT was taken back by his rudeness, when a simple no thanks would have been OK. miserable so and so, maybe they had come in on the wrong day...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Id rather know all first timers had been spoken to rather than left to read something.

But it's also good to give those that do bother to read before going to a club for the first time a good and informed guide to etiquette in clubs, as well as being told the same whilst being given a tour of the club on thier first visit. "

The way i read the original post was that this was something to read at the club.

To me I would hope all clubs have something on their website like has been copied above. To me, all clubs should have rules and more general advice on line so people can digest it. And a tour should cover that too. Reading up on how to behave once you are inside is too late in my opinion.

I think it is the lodge tgat's insists on first timers attending a social and I'd encourage that sort of initiative over this as it ensures an understanding that this doesn't.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 13/05/13 15:28:31]

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By *tasia OP   Couple
over a year ago

West Bromwich


"Id rather know all first timers had been spoken to rather than left to read something.

But it's also good to give those that do bother to read before going to a club for the first time a good and informed guide to etiquette in clubs, as well as being told the same whilst being given a tour of the club on thier first visit.

The way i read the original post was that this was something to read at the club.

To me I would hope all clubs have something on their website like has been copied above. To me, all clubs should have rules and more general advice on line so people can digest it. And a tour should cover that too. Reading up on how to behave once you are inside is too late in my opinion.

I think it is the lodge tgat's insists on first timers attending a social and I'd encourage that sort of initiative over this as it ensures an understanding that this doesn't. "

Sorry but was looking for positive input from people rather than negatives at each stage. All we are trying to obtain is a good etiquette guide, for where-ever we may wish to use it, a web site, a wall, another club that hadn't thought about it at all, etc. It was aimed for open discussion to answer the point and maybe come up with something lots of places could utilise.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Id rather know all first timers had been spoken to rather than left to read something.

But it's also good to give those that do bother to read before going to a club for the first time a good and informed guide to etiquette in clubs, as well as being told the same whilst being given a tour of the club on thier first visit.

The way i read the original post was that this was something to read at the club.

To me I would hope all clubs have something on their website like has been copied above. To me, all clubs should have rules and more general advice on line so people can digest it. And a tour should cover that too. Reading up on how to behave once you are inside is too late in my opinion.

I think it is the lodge tgat's insists on first timers attending a social and I'd encourage that sort of initiative over this as it ensures an understanding that this doesn't.

Sorry but was looking for positive input from people rather than negatives at each stage. All we are trying to obtain is a good etiquette guide, for where-ever we may wish to use it, a web site, a wall, another club that hadn't thought about it at all, etc. It was aimed for open discussion to answer the point and maybe come up with something lots of places could utilise. "

Would also advise newbies to speak up if they feel rules are being bent or they are unhappy about something.

Some people take liberties with newbies. There should be clear rules about "everybodys" conduct at a club and what people should do if they feel it's not being adhered to.

With regard to input - i think _tasias (spelling?) website is probably the best for advise to newbies we've seen - dont think you really need input tbh!

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By *it of fun cplCouple
over a year ago

village between York and Hull

For single guys we would say try to be sociable and chat in the bar area etc do not stand around the rooms etc.

For couples be polite if a single guy trys to start a conversation if not your type or not into singles tell them politely.

For everyone .. do not drink too much!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Heres some Signs that just Dont Work

PLEASE Put used Condoms in the Bins

Please Wipe the Beds and clean up your used Tissues etc, after yourselves.

No Mobile Phones

No Chewing Gum

PLEASE put Cigarette Butts in the Receptacles Provided Not on the Floor

We Aim to Please your AIM will Help

Do NOT Throw tissues in the Urinals

Please DO NOT Throw Paper Hand Towels, or Wet Wipes, Condoms in the Toilets.

Please do not throw our re usable Glasses in the Bins.

And the worst one

PLEASE LADIES NO HEELS ON THE BEDS

As we know you can lead a horse to water but you cant make it drink

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By *tasia OP   Couple
over a year ago

West Bromwich


"Heres some Signs that just Dont Work

PLEASE Put used Condoms in the Bins

Please Wipe the Beds and clean up your used Tissues etc, after yourselves.

No Mobile Phones

No Chewing Gum

PLEASE put Cigarette Butts in the Receptacles Provided Not on the Floor

We Aim to Please your AIM will Help

Do NOT Throw tissues in the Urinals

Please DO NOT Throw Paper Hand Towels, or Wet Wipes, Condoms in the Toilets.

Please do not throw our re usable Glasses in the Bins.

And the worst one

PLEASE LADIES NO HEELS ON THE BEDS

As we know you can lead a horse to water but you cant make it drink"

PMSL, good to know you have the same problems Think if we ask them to do all of these, they'll stop??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

could well do ,

if you do find a solution please share lol

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By *tasia OP   Couple
over a year ago

West Bromwich


"could well do ,

if you do find a solution please share lol "

Slippers??

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By *MFC PartiesWoman
over a year ago

Here, There & Everywhere


"Heres some Signs that just Dont Work

PLEASE Put used Condoms in the Bins

Please Wipe the Beds and clean up your used Tissues etc, after yourselves.

No Mobile Phones

No Chewing Gum

PLEASE put Cigarette Butts in the Receptacles Provided Not on the Floor

We Aim to Please your AIM will Help

Do NOT Throw tissues in the Urinals

Please DO NOT Throw Paper Hand Towels, or Wet Wipes, Condoms in the Toilets.

Please do not throw our re usable Glasses in the Bins.

And the worst one

PLEASE LADIES NO HEELS ON THE BEDS

As we know you can lead a horse to water but you cant make it drink"

Still giggling here!! ..

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By *heWolfMan
over a year ago

warwickshire

Men:

1. Put your cock away...for now.

2. This isn't the Promised Land of Pussy. Just because you have paid your entrance fee, it doesn't mean you are guaranteed sex.

3. If you do have success, don't stand around loudly comparing notes with other men. Asking "how many have you had?" might seem clever to you, but many people find it offensive.

Don't have a right old laugh discussing "that old bird/slut/fat chick/slapper" you have been trying to persuade to blow you. It will carry across the club, and you WILL be overheard by the subject or their friends sooner or later. The management accepts no responsibility for kickings or snapped penii dealt out to loudmouths.

4. If people are playing in public, it doesn't mean "Come and get some". Keep your hands to yourself until you are invited. Similarly, shut the fuck up when others are playing. No-one wants to hear you talking about your clutch pedal with your mate, it puts people off their stroke.

If it's a BDSM scene you are viewing, don't wince loudly, discuss how terrible it looks, or how you can't understand how anyone likes that sort of thing. If you don't like it, fuck off. Quietly.

5. Don't run round like a dog with two dicks. You aren't missing anything that hasn't happened before or won't happen again. Calm down, there will be plenty to see and perhaps do if you aren't panting in the corner like you have just sprinted for the last bus.

Desperation isn't attractive and people aren't going to jump back onto each other just because you weren't there to see it.

Have patience though, and you might be in the right place at the right time when something else sparks off.

Ladies.

You are going to be hit on again and again and again. If you want to use the sauna, alone, don't huff and puff when you are joined by lots of new man friends ( some of whom won't speak to you, just sit their rubbing their cocks). If you want peace and quiet, the municipal sports centre is down the road.

Couples.

If a single man approaches you, don't scowl at him because you'd rather meet a single bi fem who looks like Elle McPherson. He would too.

Be realistic. Not all men have 9" cocks and bodies like Brad Pitt. (Except me) Middle age spread and Male Pattern Baldness are not crimes (yet), so don't sneer at those who are afflicted - they have feelings too. When insulted, they may retaliate by mentioning your wife's jelly-belly, and you know how that brings the curtain crashing down on a night of sexy fun, don't you?

Etc Etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is an absolute minefield lol !!!

The one thing that immediately springs to mind regarding rules etc is that their are people who just wont respect them regardless of whether they are a couple or a single. On this basis there should be a one strike rule ( behave or leave simple )

You may think this is harsh but in our experience people will take the piss and enforcing the rules sends a clear message that mis behaviour will not be tolerated. Swinging clubs are not the same as normal clubs / pubs no matter what anyone says.

The unwritten rules and etiquette are different and whilst you can treat it like a pub/club in the social sense the underlying theme is to play therefore that will be in everyones minds, so sending a clear message to all attendee's is paramount whether newbies or seasoned swingers.

Newbies attending for a first time should preferably be given a full tour and explained by the owners / hosts of the rules and guidelines and putting a poster up by the entrance with guidelines is a great idea as well putting it on the website

This is just our opinion but based on experience would work

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By *otlovefun42Couple
over a year ago

Costa Blanca Spain...


"Men:

1. Put your cock away...for now.

2. This isn't the Promised Land of Pussy. Just because you have paid your entrance fee, it doesn't mean you are guaranteed sex.

3. If you do have success, don't stand around loudly comparing notes with other men. Asking "how many have you had?" might seem clever to you, but many people find it offensive.

Don't have a right old laugh discussing "that old bird/slut/fat chick/slapper" you have been trying to persuade to blow you. It will carry across the club, and you WILL be overheard by the subject or their friends sooner or later. The management accepts no responsibility for kickings or snapped penii dealt out to loudmouths.

4. If people are playing in public, it doesn't mean "Come and get some". Keep your hands to yourself until you are invited. Similarly, shut the fuck up when others are playing. No-one wants to hear you talking about your clutch pedal with your mate, it puts people off their stroke.

If it's a BDSM scene you are viewing, don't wince loudly, discuss how terrible it looks, or how you can't understand how anyone likes that sort of thing. If you don't like it, fuck off. Quietly.

5. Don't run round like a dog with two dicks. You aren't missing anything that hasn't happened before or won't happen again. Calm down, there will be plenty to see and perhaps do if you aren't panting in the corner like you have just sprinted for the last bus.

Desperation isn't attractive and people aren't going to jump back onto each other just because you weren't there to see it.

Have patience though, and you might be in the right place at the right time when something else sparks off.

Ladies.

You are going to be hit on again and again and again. If you want to use the sauna, alone, don't huff and puff when you are joined by lots of new man friends ( some of whom won't speak to you, just sit their rubbing their cocks). If you want peace and quiet, the municipal sports centre is down the road.

Couples.

If a single man approaches you, don't scowl at him because you'd rather meet a single bi fem who looks like Elle McPherson. He would too.

Be realistic. Not all men have 9" cocks and bodies like Brad Pitt. (Except me) Middle age spread and Male Pattern Baldness are not crimes (yet), so don't sneer at those who are afflicted - they have feelings too. When insulted, they may retaliate by mentioning your wife's jelly-belly, and you know how that brings the curtain crashing down on a night of sexy fun, don't you?

Etc Etc "

Excellent

I would add for the single guys though.

By all means try to break the ice and chat to a couple, but chat to the COUPLE. Don't stand staring for half an hour then wait for the male half to go to the toilet then hit on the lady while she is alone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't have too much to drink a d*unk woman is nearly as bad as a d*unk single guy and always ask ... What's the worst a couple can say to a single guy when he asks "do you want some company ?" No thanks !!! Pick your ego up and move on .... Clubs are amazing places and every night is a new experience have fun xx lee

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im agreeing with _hewolf but he missed the bit about simple respect. Simply respect everyone or respectfully fuck off

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By *oubleDsCouple
over a year ago

Manchester

I fail to see why you need to comment on his ethnicty

purely because "he" played on it he spoke excellent english when he arrived but later on when caught claimed in broken english he didnt understand .

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By *hoenixcouplexxCouple
over a year ago

Leicestershire


"could well do ,

if you do find a solution please share lol

Slippers?? "

Branded slippers!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think we are gonna go with "BEDSOX"

Pink for Ladies

Blue for Da Boys

for that lil bit o shiek Look

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Respect...

1) the club

2) the rules

3) each other

4) yourselves

no touching without permission (anywhere)

no means no

don't be a random towel tugger.

join in conversation politely.

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