FabSwingers.com forum: The ‘wanking dead’: can we abandon this description?

By *orzag OP Man
over a year ago

Colchester

The phrase ‘The Wanking Dead’ is often used in these forums to describe the single guys who attend clubs like Silverleigh, Eureka, etc. As a single guy myself I find it unpleasant and unfair. Certainly there are many singletons who are pushy, insensitive and misogynistic but the majority of us are just men whose sexuality is basically voyeuristic. None of us can choose how our sexuality functions, we can only deal with it. I count myself fortunate that this is how I work because it is surely the safest form of polyamorous consensual sex you can have and I know that there are couples whose sexuality expresses itself as pleasure in being watched just as mine is in the pleasure of watching. And those couples can rest assured that we voyeurs know that ‘no’ means ‘no’ and will accept that answer without demur. I usually ask if it’s ok for me to watch and have been lucky enough to have had some hugely sexy experiences without laying a finger on anyone (except myself, obv!)

So please, have some sympathy and empathy for those whose sexuality is different to yours

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By *hades Of GreyMan
over a year ago

Leeds

The phrase 'The Wanking Dead' refers to those men in a towel that wander around, after anything looking remotely like a female, with a hand inside the towel attempting to raise the 'dead'. I've seen hundreds of them in my time at clubs and it's not a good look, couples must find it a turn off.

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By *iss DevilWoman
over a year ago

Bedford

"The phrase 'The Wanking Dead' refers to those men in a towel that wander around, after anything looking remotely like a female, with a hand inside the towel attempting to raise the 'dead'. I've seen hundreds of them in my time at clubs and it's not a good look, couples must find it a turn off.

This, as well as the ones that just whip their cocks out without even saying "hello" and either start playing with themselves or expect to be invited to play just because they have a cock.

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By *leasureseekers123Couple
over a year ago

Heathrow

This, as well as the ones that just whip their cocks out without even saying "hello" and either start playing with themselves or expect to be invited to play just because they have a cock. "

Exactly this!

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By *assy MissWoman
over a year ago

Sent to Coventry

As everyone else has said, not all single men are ‘wanking dead’.

I actually think that’s a very apt phrase for those irritating single men who have no idea how to behave in a club

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By *g1979Man
over a year ago

bexley

The wanking dead make it impossible to go to places like silverleigh as part of a couple.

You go into the steam room and suddenly there's 10 guys trying to get in the room with you tugging on themselves. You get up and leave and they follow you to the sauna. You go to a play room and lock the door and they keep knocking. It's locked for a reason.

When they tell you to fuck off they don't like it.

These men are not outliers

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By *iss LovelyWoman
over a year ago

Here and There

I think there’s a huge difference between respectfully watching someone play and standing a little too close to the action with your dick out, wanking and grunting, clearly hoping to join in.

I don’t think anyone considers all single men to be the wanking dead. It’s behaviour that dictates that moniker.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

I use the wanking dead to describe the wanking dead.

A single male isn't a wanking dead if he doesn't act like it.

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By *rozac_fairyCouple
over a year ago

Tamworth

Can it ever be abandoned when it perfectly describes a good portion of single guys who don't know how to act though?

The thing is, if you're not one of them, it isn't describing you. You know how you behave, how you approach people etc.

If you feel it doesn't apply to you, then you've nothing to worry about with other people choosing to use a phrase that encompasses the behaviour from men who can't take no as an answer in clubs, who follow women and couples around like lost lambs, who slob their nob out at the very hint of a woman in the room etc

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By *p4fun60Couple
over a year ago

Hampshire

Don't take the term to heart OP if you don't behave like that, but even today at kestrels we experienced the wanking dead & as a couple we know not to tar all single guys with the same brush - & that's why we often play in the cinema room with guys who are non pushy & respectful of us sharing ourselves with them & the others who are full of expectations, constantly follow us around & often just decide to sit next to us & start playing with their cocks get a swift "fuck off" are just a turn off

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By *otInventedHereMan
over a year ago

West Midlands

As a single male visitor to clubs I have no problem with the term and use it myself, it shouldn't be seen as an offensive label for any man that isn't behaving like that. It's very easy for everyone to tell the difference between men who are friendly, respectful and sociable vs men acting like a pack of meercats every time a woman is near.

They do annoy the hell out of me though, I am generally very sociable but if there are guys like that around I will modify my own behaviour to actually avoid the hot tub, sauna etc even when I want to use it, purely because I don't want women or couples to feel I am only in there because they are!

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West

I love it.

I got to clubs and play purposely to be watched and think it’s a compliment if people are playing round you.

Of course, with the expectation of club etiquette.

Don’t understand why people play in public if they don’t want people watching, IMO, that’s what the private rooms are for.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have been to a few clubs and to be honest there are wanking dead there ,they are annoying and often don’t take no as an answer

They spoil clubs for us

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By *iss DevilWoman
over a year ago

Bedford

"I love it.

I got to clubs and play purposely to be watched and think it’s a compliment if people are playing round you.

Of course, with the expectation of club etiquette.

Don’t understand why people play in public if they don’t want people watching, IMO, that’s what the private rooms are for. "

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West

"I love it.

I got to clubs and play purposely to be watched and think it’s a compliment if people are playing round you.

Of course, with the expectation of club etiquette.

Don’t understand why people play in public if they don’t want people watching, IMO, that’s what the private rooms are for.

As I said, with the expectation of club etiquette

I thought that would cover that

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By *eathrow pineappleCouple
over a year ago

West London

"I love it.

I got to clubs and play purposely to be watched and think it’s a compliment if people are playing round you.

Of course, with the expectation of club etiquette.

Don’t understand why people play in public if they don’t want people watching, IMO, that’s what the private rooms are for.

There is people watching others play from a respectful distance, and there is people watching others play with their dicks out millimeters from your face. I have absolutely not a problem with the respectful ones. "
we've had to tell people to go away as they've got to close for our liking. I've not got a problem with taking actions in to my own hands. (and I don't mean his cock)

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

It's not a term fixed to all men, just some of them. Those who choose to behave a certain way are the ones that fit the description.

Others can keep on doing their good stuff

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By *iss LovelyWoman
over a year ago

Here and There

"I love it.

I got to clubs and play purposely to be watched and think it’s a compliment if people are playing round you.

Of course, with the expectation of club etiquette.

Don’t understand why people play in public if they don’t want people watching, IMO, that’s what the private rooms are for.

As I said, with the expectation of club etiquette

I thought that would cover that

I don’t mind people watching if I’m open playing, but I’m not keen on being surrounded by wankers as generally they’re not people I find attractive, so it tends to put me off my stride. Hence why I usually only open play at certain parties.

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By *g and funnyCouple
over a year ago

Clacton

" And those couples can rest assured that we voyeurs know that ‘no’ means ‘no’ and will accept that answer without demur."

Some do, and if you're someone who takes heed of a simple no then that's all well and good.

Unfortunately there are men for whom the word no gets changed in their head to "Yes, please keep staying there or even better come closer and maybe touch us".

For those "special" men it's often required to say no repeatedly and occasionally in a more expletive laden form to make them realise no means no.

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By *ink vixenCouple
over a year ago

Medway

"The wanking dead make it impossible to go to places like silverleigh as part of a couple.

When they tell you to fuck off they don't like it.

These men are not outliers"

We go to Silverleigh quite frequently and on very rare occasions is there the odd solitary male acting like a twat.

We’ve never been bothered by any groups of men.

There’s a couple of regulars on the forums from Kent that love to bash single guys and always overuse this offensive term.

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By *rincess-PeachWoman
over a year ago

irrelevant

"I use the wanking dead to describe the wanking dead.

A single male isn't a wanking dead if he doesn't act like it."

Exactly this.

I am a voyeur myself. But I cannot be left alone to do that in clubs men constantly mither me when I am simply try to watch.

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By *rincess-PeachWoman
over a year ago

irrelevant

"I love it.

I got to clubs and play purposely to be watched and think it’s a compliment if people are playing round you.

Of course, with the expectation of club etiquette.

Don’t understand why people play in public if they don’t want people watching, IMO, that’s what the private rooms are for. "

I love being watching too

but watched not when they come close up with the dick

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By *emini and ScorpioCouple
over a year ago

The South West

"Can it ever be abandoned when it perfectly describes a good portion of single guys who don't know how to act though?

The thing is, if you're not one of them, it isn't describing you. You know how you behave, how you approach people etc.

This is the answer if you’re someone who asks, keeps a good distance and doesn’t follow people around you are not one of them so no need to be offended.

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By *togMan
over a year ago

Blackpool

Perhaps NPC's or dirty pleaders instead?

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By *elkieWoman
over a year ago

Durham

"The phrase ‘The Wanking Dead’ is often used in these forums to describe the single guys who attend clubs like Silverleigh, Eureka, etc. As a single guy myself I find it unpleasant and unfair. Certainly there are many singletons who are pushy, insensitive and misogynistic but the majority of us are just men whose sexuality is basically voyeuristic. None of us can choose how our sexuality functions, we can only deal with it. I count myself fortunate that this is how I work because it is surely the safest form of polyamorous consensual sex you can have and I know that there are couples whose sexuality expresses itself as pleasure in being watched just as mine is in the pleasure of watching. And those couples can rest assured that we voyeurs know that ‘no’ means ‘no’ and will accept that answer without demur. I usually ask if it’s ok for me to watch and have been lucky enough to have had some hugely sexy experiences without laying a finger on anyone (except myself, obv!)

So please, have some sympathy and empathy for those whose sexuality is different to yours

I don’t know why you think your sexuality is different. So many club goers are voyeuristic, including that couple in the middle of the action. You can be both an exhibitionist AND a voyeur, you know?

Also, gently: swinging isn’t polyamory. There are plenty of polyamorous people who are also swingers, but sometimes it’s just sex and that’s ok.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think 99% of people who play on the big bed/ open area like the fact they have a crowd of people watching and 99% the reason why you would play in the open.

Obviously no touching and other rules apply if you're watching personally the only reason I go to clubs is to be watched hahaha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This, as well as the ones that just whip their cocks out without even saying "hello" and either start playing with themselves or expect to be invited to play just because they have a cock. "

That’s creepy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Slide in and play lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I could never imagine doing that, the label sounds accurate

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By *verysmileMan
over a year ago

Canterbury

I can live with that. As a regular club attendee, you can see them everywhere.

Very accurate.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I can live with that. As a regular club attendee, you can see them everywhere.

Very accurate....."

It sounds scary

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Like those orcs in Lord of the Rings who cant stop thinking about eating meat

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By *unner6969Man
over a year ago

Bucks/London/Oxford

Both of these descriptions are exactly what put me off visiting a club as a single male. Intrigued by the idea of clubs but really don’t want to be considered a ‘dirty old man’.

I still find it odd that (some) Swingers can be so judgmental and puritanical.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Me and an ex visited the cinema in Xstasia a few years ago, we hid at the back to play as to not disturb any one

Within about 10 minutes there were 5/6 standing over us wanking, one guy had his dick out right by my face, I could of cried

Correct me if I'm wrong but is that not what people mean when they refer to the 'wanking dead'?

It made me so uncomfortable that we left

I wouldn't off minded them watching but they were standing so close we for sure would of been hit with a facial plus other cum shots had we stayed there and let them carry on

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By *allGuyNEMan
over a year ago

Near Durham

Yeah, visiting a swinger's club is definitely something I would like to do, but I think I'd feel quite self-conscious about being just a creepy face amongst many single guys lol

Plus I can be quite the lurker at these kinds of places, so for now it's just a fantasy;)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Me and an ex visited the cinema in Xstasia a few years ago, we hid at the back to play as to not disturb any one

Within about 10 minutes there were 5/6 standing over us wanking, one guy had his dick out right by my face, I could of cried

Correct me if I'm wrong but is that not what people mean when they refer to the 'wanking dead'?

It made me so uncomfortable that we left

I wouldn't off minded them watching but they were standing so close we for sure would of been hit with a facial plus other cum shots had we stayed there and let them carry on "

Bless you x

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By *ysonfuryMan
over a year ago

Stockport

I'm a single guy and I don't bother with clubs now for this reason, it's not great to see and I'm sure it must put lots of couples and single ladies off. I only go to a club now if I'm going with someone

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By *quirtyndirty!Couple
over a year ago

Nottingham

We don't mind the wankers lol as long as they are respectful.

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

The last time we went to Eureka it was on a quiet Friday afternoon. We spent most of the time around the pool. We went into the club house and got in the jacuzzi that seats about eight people, but it was just us two in there. A guy came along and sat right next to Hannah despite there being plenty of space. She got up and moved. He made a comment to the effect that she was being rude.

A while later we went to the steam room. That same guy came in and sat down facing us. He sat there having a wank, looking at Hannah.

At no point did we do anything sexual or give him the impression we had any interest in him or that we would be OK with his behaviour.

I don't apologise that there is a derogatory term for people like him. They spoil it for a lot of people and put a lot of women off going to these places. Hannah is not going back to Eureka specifically because of him.

If you're not one of them then good for you, but these people exist in abundance and if we want to call them the wanking dead then we will because it's highly appropriate.

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By *ink vixenCouple
over a year ago

Medway

"The last time we went to Eureka it was on a quiet Friday afternoon. We spent most of the time around the pool. We went into the club house and got in the jacuzzi that seats about eight people, but it was just us two in there. A guy came along and sat right next to Hannah despite there being plenty of space. She got up and moved. He made a comment to the effect that she was being rude.

A while later we went to the steam room. That same guy came in and sat down facing us. He sat there having a wank, looking at Hannah.

At no point did we do anything sexual or give him the impression we had any interest in him or that we would be OK with his behaviour.

If you're not one of them then good for you, but these people exist in abundance and if we want to call them the wanking dead then we will because it's highly appropriate. "

Why didn’t you just tell him to f*** off?

Or if you’re not willing to look after yourselves then inform the staff about his behaviour?

Now he’ll just do that to someone else because he believes there is no penalty.

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By *razytimesinloveCouple
over a year ago

SW Scotland

Had our first experience of this at quest the other week, following us about was creepy so we decided to just shut the door behind us whenever we went to a room.

No one got close enough to warrant telling the staff, it’s just a bit desperate that as soon as we left the bar about three guys got up immediately.

We don’t class all single guys as the wanking dead either, chatted to a guy for a bit at the start of the night and he couldn’t have been any friendlier. So being well mannered will definitely set you apart from the rest.

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By *iss LovelyWoman
over a year ago

Here and There

"Me and an ex visited the cinema in Xstasia a few years ago, we hid at the back to play as to not disturb any one

Within about 10 minutes there were 5/6 standing over us wanking, one guy had his dick out right by my face, I could of cried

Correct me if I'm wrong but is that not what people mean when they refer to the 'wanking dead'?

It made me so uncomfortable that we left

I wouldn't off minded them watching but they were standing so close we for sure would of been hit with a facial plus other cum shots had we stayed there and let them carry on "

It’s awful isn’t it? I’ve had that before. It just ruins it. Especially as generally they’re guys you have zero interest in so don’t really even want to see their penis, let alone have it shoved in your face. Very creepy and disrespectful.

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By *illingdon_ladMan
over a year ago

Bicester

"I'm a single guy and I don't bother with clubs now for this reason, it's not great to see and I'm sure it must put lots of couples and single ladies off. I only go to a club now if I'm going with someone "

Just don't do what people are saying in this thread and you'd be ok.

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By *oxesMan
over a year ago

Southend, Essex

So please, have some sympathy and empathy for those whose sexuality is different to yours

I thought it was apiss take off waking the dead.

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By *unner6969Man
over a year ago

Bucks/London/Oxford

And that’s exactly what is putting me off going to a club. See my post in this forum re. Kestrels (Tuesday). I have a chance to go tomorrow for the first time but don’t want to be viewed with disdain just because I’m attending as a solo man.

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By *illingdon_ladMan
over a year ago

Bicester

There's a guy who frequents a certain club near Heathrow, he's behaviour infuriates me so much. A couple or more might go into one of the locked play rooms and I and my fwb might have a little look, this guy will push past people (shoving in some cases) just so he can be in front with his cock already in his hand. Last time we visited my fwb decided to give me a blow job, he plonked himself next to us whipped out his wang and started beating the meat, what was even more of a put of was the gutteral moans of "oh yeah" & "ooh, suck that cock". I just had visions of a scuffling zombie murmmering brains brains.

This is my thoughts of the wanking dead are!

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By *illingdon_ladMan
over a year ago

Bicester

"And that’s exactly what is putting me off going to a club. See my post in this forum re. Kestrels (Tuesday). I have a chance to go tomorrow for the first time but don’t want to be viewed with disdain just because I’m attending as a solo man."

Are you the type who gets in people's faces jerking the gerkin? or are you respectful and will interact with people? If your the latter then your unlikely to be seen with any disdain.

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By *emini and ScorpioCouple
over a year ago

The South West

"There's a guy who frequents a certain club near Heathrow, he's behaviour infuriates me so much. A couple or more might go into one of the locked play rooms and I and my fwb might have a little look, this guy will push past people (shoving in some cases) just so he can be in front with his cock already in his hand. Last time we visited my fwb decided to give me a blow job, he plonked himself next to us whipped out his wang and started beating the meat, what was even more of a put of was the gutteral moans of "oh yeah" & "ooh, suck that cock". I just had visions of a scuffling zombie murmmering brains brains.

This is my thoughts of the wanking dead are!"

If you tell him to fuck off does he actually leave or is he more persistent?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This type of woe is me post is so frustrating

Have you actually read the above descriptions? The post of women saying explaining their experiences with this type of person?

No one single person is saying that all men fit this description nor are they saying that single men aren't welcome in clubs

If you don't conduct yourselves in that way what is the problem?

Surely as single men you go to play with women? So it would be in your best interests as much as ours that the people described above be called out as so that when women go to those spaces they don't feel uncomfortable and leave?

Because what do you think happens when all women get to the point where they don't like clubs and stop going?

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By *isfits behaving badlyCouple
over a year ago

Coventry

It's a simple mater of behaviour. We have no problem with voyeurs. They are are perfectly valid part of the scene (Mrs Misfit is one of the biggest voyeurs I know). But some guys either don't know or know but deliberately disregard anyway the rights and wrong. For example most people can tell when people have positioned them seleves in a space to be watched (or maybe even joined in with) and when they have not.

A lot of the issue is space or lack of respect for it. Guys who practily dive in. Guys who enter spaces they shouldn't, for example removing the chain across a door an entering. Guys who invade the sound space with their commentary and bizarre sex noises. Guys who just blatantly follow you closely around the club. Guy who stare and make very weird eye contact. Guys who even worse seem to get off on making people uncomfortable with their eye contact and/or creepy behaviour.

We get it's difficult for guys. I was a single guy on the club scene and have been to clubs since alone. Get some guys are just there to watch. Also get that it is hard to know the nuances and exact best approach with new people. Sometimes you may judge things a little wrong. That's OK it happens, as long as your approach comes from a position of respect and consent. But (disappointingly) so many guys approach things so badly or are so motivated by their own needs for gratification respect for others goes out the window.

Lots of great single guys out there, we've met a few. Unfortunately the bad behaviour of a few can seriously make other couples and single women set high default defenses with all guys (even when the approach, time and space is right).

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By *anted by NightMan
over a year ago

Shangri-La

This

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By *eenawMan
over a year ago

anywhere and everywhere

They can be spotted a mile off, distinctly not a good look, absolutely nothing remotely tempting about them that would inspire us to invite them to join the fun and just spoil it for the respectful others

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West

This

As someone who only plays with single men, this makes me sad.

Not sure why the usual decent males would take offence if they don’t act like this.

Very grateful to the men who club and are decent lol x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All men matter

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This puts us off attending clubs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As such was our first experience in Pandora. We did go in the dungeon but for the girls to play with each other on the swing.

Surely enough 3 of them must have followed us in there. As newbies we didn't pay attention if there is anyone looking or following. Was overwhelmed by everything at first.

As soon as the girls started to play. They surrounded the swing, being so close that we could smell them. Promptly got up and left. Even when we entered an empty private room, they felt like they are entitled to follow.

These are the sort of wanking dead that majority refer to. More than welcome to watch, but by no means is it an invitation to come in cumshot distance wanking over us simply because you've seen a pair of tits.

To the respectful men this term should not be offensive at all. Plenty of nice guys who can keep their distance and please themselves whilst watching and not being creepy.

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West

This puts us off attending clubs "

Most decent, hot, big party events rarely have many, if any at all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This puts us off attending clubs

Most decent, hot, big party events rarely have many, if any at all. "

We may have a look at those then, thank you.

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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

They can be fully clothed and still be the ‘wanking dead’ as it’s obvious what they’re doing. Some guys don’t seem to take the hint that they aren’t welcome.

Going to a club doesn’t guarantee that you’ll play but for those guys they seem to have an expectation that it gives them some sort of ‘right’ to play with anyone in the club.

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By *ellfireClubMan
over a year ago

Sunbury-On-Thames

Never be afraid to report unwelcome advances; we will deal with them quickly if we are aware. It is a small minority, but they cause disproportionate upset and wear our carpets out!

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By *iss DevilWoman
over a year ago

Bedford

You will not be seen with disdain just because you are attending as a single man. If you smile, look friendly, smell nice, don't follow people around and don't whip your cock out at the slightest sight of a woman, you will be fine. And who knows, you may even get invited to play. Go with zero expectations apart from using the club's facilities and you'll be fine.

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By *r-8-BBCMan
over a year ago

LONDON

This, as well as the ones that just whip their cocks out without even saying "hello" and either start playing with themselves or expect to be invited to play just because they have a cock. "

It's the first time I have heard if this phrase

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By *ophisticatedfunCouple
over a year ago

Pllaya Del Ingles

Completely agree...a big difference. I love to see single guys have a good time....but respect is so important, and I find guys getting too close rubbing their cocks next to me is not only disrespectful but a massive turn off it is not welcome.....which ruins the play that I am having with my partner or friends...we loose our mojo and the play ends....so frustrating!

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By *iss DevilWoman
over a year ago

Bedford

This, as well as the ones that just whip their cocks out without even saying "hello" and either start playing with themselves or expect to be invited to play just because they have a cock.

It's the first time I have heard if this phrase

Which phrase? The "whip the cock out"?

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By *r-8-BBCMan
over a year ago

LONDON

This, as well as the ones that just whip their cocks out without even saying "hello" and either start playing with themselves or expect to be invited to play just because they have a cock.

It's the first time I have heard if this phrase

Which phrase? The "whip the cock out"? "

No "The Wanking Dead"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Actually becoming quite concerned as to what I will find in a few weeks, attending a Friday night for the first time, Saturday is our go to nights

Only ever seen one single man at a big event who was acting like that, as soon as he saw any women walk past he speed up playing and was looking up and down every woman that passed

The night was billed as couples/single females with select invited males ,it was a Saturday!

For the Friday night We are going for the themed night (music taste )and hope to meet up with a couple with bi female

We don’t mind to be exhibitionists but we have our limits

Are we walking into the wanking dead ?

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By *inkForLifeCouple
over a year ago

North Shields

"Yeah, visiting a swinger's club is definitely something I would like to do, but I think I'd feel quite self-conscious about being just a creepy face amongst many single guys lol

Plus I can be quite the lurker at these kinds of places, so for now it's just a fantasy;)"

Go to Shhh in Newcastle. I've never seen any guys who'd fit the wanking dead definition there. It's not over ran by single men. I'd highly recommended a Thursday evening, usually some couples in and a few single women. The bar setup is great as it's a big table (think kitchen island) so you can sit there and easily join in conversation without having to directly approach anyone.

Drop us a message if you have any questions.

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By *rivervaderMan
over a year ago

bolton

I went to a MOTD event at my local club was talking to a nice lady when an older gent came and sat down facing her and started wanking in front of her wich made her very uneasy so she left

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

A while later we went to the steam room. That same guy came in and sat down facing us. He sat there having a wank, looking at Hannah.

At no point did we do anything sexual or give him the impression we had any interest in him or that we would be OK with his behaviour.

If you're not one of them then good for you, but these people exist in abundance and if we want to call them the wanking dead then we will because it's highly appropriate.

Why didn’t you just tell him to f*** off?

Or if you’re not willing to look after yourselves then inform the staff about his behaviour?

Now he’ll just do that to someone else because he believes there is no penalty. "

Oh it's our fault. I see. Sorry.

Who said we didn't tell the staff?

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By *ragon007Man
over a year ago

london

Just ban all the single men from clubs and form here so no more discussion or drama or some body doing it wrong of getting feeling hurt lol it will simpler if every one was couple so they can wank alively lol ??

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

It's a good description, why abandon it?

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By *r-8-BBCMan
over a year ago

LONDON

Just like there is a gay section, why not have a couples section you can login to, that way you can organise your parties and group's and not be bothered by us rampant single male

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By *uttercup and BeauCouple
over a year ago

kent

No we can’t do away with this description. The amount of people that have taken the time to comment shows it’s justified.

Thankfully I’ve never had to experience things as bad as some of them…. However

We’ve seen guys barge past other people cock in hand to be at the front of a queue watching couples play. I had a guy stand up and wave his cock in my direction, hoping to temp me I assume. Had times when every time I moved at our local naturist spa they’d get up and follow us. Also had a guy slip a note under our bedroom door asking to join in when we were playing with friends. Then opening the door to find he’s been and got a chair and he was sat outside… on the off chance of an invite I assume. None of this behaviour is acceptable.

All of this stops me attending spa’s on my own, which is a real shame.

Jules x

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

This, as well as the ones that just whip their cocks out without even saying "hello" and either start playing with themselves or expect to be invited to play just because they have a cock. "

If these people didn't exist there would be no wanking dead, the general male population that don't act like weirdos don't get referred to as such.

Mrs

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

"Just like there is a gay section, why not have a couples section you can login to, that way you can organise your parties and group's and not be bothered by us rampant single male

People shouldn't have to be worried about being "bothered by rampant single males" they shouldn't be bothering people full stop.

Mrs

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By *elkieWoman
over a year ago

Durham

"Just like there is a gay section, why not have a couples section you can login to, that way you can organise your parties and group's and not be bothered by us rampant single male

People shouldn't have to be worried about being "bothered by rampant single males" they shouldn't be bothering people full stop.

Mrs "

Plus the people most critical of the wanking dead, IMO, are the single blokes who are getting cockblocked by these dickheads.

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West

"Just ban all the single men from clubs and form here so no more discussion or drama or some body doing it wrong of getting feeling hurt lol it will simpler if every one was couple so they can wank alively lol ??

Eyyyy no thank you! Gimme the singles ha

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By *ndy8goldMan
over a year ago

blackburn

"I love it.

I got to clubs and play purposely to be watched and think it’s a compliment if people are playing round you.

Of course, with the expectation of club etiquette.

Don’t understand why people play in public if they don’t want people watching, IMO, that’s what the private rooms are for. "

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By *ndy8goldMan
over a year ago

blackburn

"I love it.

I got to clubs and play purposely to be watched and think it’s a compliment if people are playing round you.

Of course, with the expectation of club etiquette.

Don’t understand why people play in public if they don’t want people watching, IMO, that’s what the private rooms are for. "

As always communication is paramount x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Actually becoming quite concerned as to what I will find in a few weeks, attending a Friday night for the first time, Saturday is our go to nights

Only ever seen one single man at a big event who was acting like that, as soon as he saw any women walk past he speed up playing and was looking up and down every woman that passed

The night was billed as couples/single females with select invited males ,it was a Saturday!

For the Friday night We are going for the themed night (music taste )and hope to meet up with a couple with bi female

We don’t mind to be exhibitionists but we have our limits

Are we walking into the wanking dead ?

"
surly it’s not that bad is it ?

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By *ragon007Man
over a year ago

london

Eyyyy no thank you! Gimme the singles ha "

It was tounge and cheek lol ??

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By *entle_lover_xMan
over a year ago

Great Dunmow

"I love it.

I got to clubs and play purposely to be watched and think it’s a compliment if people are playing round you.

Of course, with the expectation of club etiquette.

Don’t understand why people play in public if they don’t want people watching, IMO, that’s what the private rooms are for. "

Well some places don't have any or many private rooms. Also watching comes in many shades. A few watching from a distance respectfully is one thing. A large group getting extremely close watching waving their cocks in your face is another.

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By *entle_lover_xMan
over a year ago

Great Dunmow

More to the point instead of wanking dead how about "wanking horde"?

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By *ornucopiaMan
over a year ago

Bexley

A while later we went to the steam room. That same guy came in and sat down facing us. He sat there having a wank, looking at Hannah.

...

"
That's got to have been a while ago. The steam room hasn't been open for yonks.

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By *hetalkingstoveMan
over a year ago

London

"Can it ever be abandoned when it perfectly describes a good portion of single guys who don't know how to act though?

The thing is, if you're not one of them, it isn't describing you. You know how you behave, how you approach people etc.

This is exactly it.

Some men just really can't take any criticism of male behaviour whatsoever, even when it doesn't apply to them specifically.

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By *iss LovelyWoman
over a year ago

Here and There

I go to a lot of parties that are heavy on single men and these issues don’t arise often where I go. In general the single men are chatting in the bar, charming the ladies or playing. It’s only the ones who are less attractive/have no charm/in general can’t pull that end up being a problem. They want their monies worth so can get a bit desperate.

The only parties that I go to where there are never any WD are the ones that heavily vet their guests; I prefer those, for this reason. But I understand that not everyone likes to apply for parties. But for me, quality control is key. I pick events carefully these days as I’ve had too many of these experiences and not enjoyed them

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

"Just like there is a gay section, why not have a couples section you can login to, that way you can organise your parties and group's and not be bothered by us rampant single male

How about we don't blame the victims and just expect people to act decently, and call out the ones that don't

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By *illingdon_ladMan
over a year ago

Bicester

This is my thoughts of the wanking dead are!

If you tell him to fuck off does he actually leave or is he more persistent? "

I watched several other single men tell him to fuck off plus couples it's like water off a ducks back. I find it's usually the same with most of the wanking dead.

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By *illingdon_ladMan
over a year ago

Bicester

"Just like there is a gay section, why not have a couples section you can login to, that way you can organise your parties and group's and not be bothered by us rampant single male

How about we don't blame the victims and just expect people to act decently, and call out the ones that don't

Exactly! Being a rampant single male doesn't mean you should lack basic manners.

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By *rincess-PeachWoman
over a year ago

irrelevant

Yes yes we know its not ALL single men no one is saying that. It has even been described what the wanking dead is. Its men walking around like zombies, wanking near to people without any etiquette.we do not see all men as the wanking dead ,

If you do not act like a creep then do not concern yourself with other men being creepy. Unless you want to help the situation and call them out.

I've met plenty of very respectful single men and plenty of disrespectful people of any gender. This isn't about ALL men. I have witnessed decent men saying "hey that's not cool" or "hey dickhead, she said no" this is what is needed not defending ALL men

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By *estinyIsAllCouple
over a year ago

Staffordshire

"This, as well as the ones that just whip their cocks out without even saying "hello" and either start playing with themselves or expect to be invited to play just because they have a cock. "

These responses cover EXACTLY why we won't ever do the club scene. Yuck.

D x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I love it.

I got to clubs and play purposely to be watched and think it’s a compliment if people are playing round you.

Of course, with the expectation of club etiquette.

Don’t understand why people play in public if they don’t want people watching, IMO, that’s what the private rooms are for.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes yes we know its not ALL single men no one is saying that. It has even been described what the wanking dead is. Its men walking around like zombies, wanking near to people without any etiquette.we do not see all men as the wanking dead ,

If you do not act like a creep then do not concern yourself with other men being creepy. Unless you want to help the situation and call them out.

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By *r-8-BBCMan
over a year ago

LONDON

Eyyyy no thank you! Gimme the singles ha "

Just what she said

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think some people need to get a life and stop moaning the world has become a horrible place to live. Karen

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By *redy81Man
over a year ago

London

As someone rightly said above, the WDs are usually those who have very low self-confidence, don't even hope to really attract a woman and be "the chosen one", getting invited for some more private fun.

For this reason, they don't even try to socialize, chat, rather hunt for "greedy girl" situations, and hope to find women who don't want anything other interaction other than getting cocks. So they think it's gonna work if they show off directly what's on offer.

I agree, that it's awkward and really bad, but don't forget, most of these guys have mental issues, incels, etc. Yes, they exist and of course, they also find swinger clubs...

And I also must say that I often see some of the WDs get "rewarded" later during the parties... That's another thing that often with those women, who didn't attract anyone else either, so as the end of the night is getting closer, they will become each other's "option B" and both go for it. It might sound harsh, but I saw it so many times... In the end, it's the market, demand, and supply...

If you want to avoid WDs, go to parties that allow only a limited number of well-wetted single men, and you will have a much better time, whether you are a girl, a guy, or a couple...

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By *oknickers coupleCouple
over a year ago

A Town called Malice

We only go to clubs, mainly Chams in Darlaston ( but have been to many others) generally, we have found the majority of single guys are very polite and not too rude or “in you face” we have had the odd few followers, but a simple “no thanks” & they generally leave us alone. We’re not averse to single guys, infact, depending on how we feel at the time we welcome 1 or more… but it has normally always been, can we join/are you ok if I touch. We have seen the “WD” & generally steer clear of those. Most couples, IMO know these sort & keep a distance from them & the couples that, like us, like a single guy to sometimes join us, will find the undead and have a fun time

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By *.T.Man
over a year ago

Birmingham Airport

Does amazing wanking meerkats fit any better?

Peering round, up and over whilst wrestling the peen into submission?

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By *unchalMan
over a year ago

Dartford

So please, have some sympathy and empathy for those whose sexuality is different to yours

Get a grip, mister. Nothing on here is fair. 2% of the men are having sex with 95% of the women, who make up the 15% of all the folk on here.

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By *e-funcoupleCouple
over a year ago

Middlesbrough

Our first trip to a club (I won’t name as it isn’t there fault)

Nerves as is usual for any newbie in a club, but we took the plunge and dressed down and moved back to the bar area for a few more drinks for Dutch courage.

We tried to ignore the single men (not all) in towels, touching themselves while looking at women and thought we would venture to the rooms.

We settled on the cinema room, a few pleasant men enjoying the film so we sat at the back, one thing led to another and my good lady ventured south and gave me some oral, I closed my eyes to enjoy the pleasure she was giving only to hear the unmistakable sound of a cock being wanked to an inch of its life right next to my head.

I didnt want to open my eyes as my cock began to go flaccid and my good lady stopped only to be greeted by a penis within inches of my head.

Not the first visit we wanted and extremely off putting for a newbie.

Regrettably I think the ‘wanking dead’ is a very suitable term for those single men who have no intention of interacting with couples or even understand what ‘swinging’ is about but prefer to ‘beat their meat’ with only one thing in mind, their own enjoyment.

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By *unguy0069Man
over a year ago

Reigate

And there are the hungry wanking dead too.

Recently at a club, I wondered into the dungeon room and saw a guy sitting no more than three feet away from a couple. He was staring at them while vigorously pulling away at his cock under his towel…….and also while eating a Twix.

I said to him “seriously?!” and then he looked puzzled as he replied “what?”. The couple then also said he should move far away from them, so he just shuffled his seat back a couple more feet while finishing his snack and scrunching up the wrapper. A true story I’m afraid.

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By *rFoxAndXenoCouple
over a year ago

Weymouth

On our second club visit we were still pretty green and naive, and didn't realise how much of an "invitation" some guys would find an unlocked door to be.

Mr Fox was going down on me whilst I was laying in a swing, so of course his vision was obscured. The lights in the room were bright, so when I opened my eyes it took me a second to adjust and realise a guy was wanking within facial distance next to my head

Obviously next time Mr Fox will be keeping more of his wits about him, and I will not hesitate to make a fuss if I'm made to feel uncomfortable again!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I use the wanking dead to describe the wanking dead.

A single male isn't a wanking dead if he doesn't act like it."

Exactly this

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By *iss LovelyWoman
over a year ago

Here and There

"And there are the hungry wanking dead too.

Christ. That’s attractive

I get that people playing in the open will expect people to watch, but those watching could at least try to keep things semi sexy. Clearly thst fella (and many others) are, people have said above, are only interested in their own gratification. There’s no way any of these WD think they’re creating a mutually enjoyable experience for the people they’re harassing. They must know it spoils the fun for many involved.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And there are the hungry wanking dead too.

Love the twix story haha

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By *ornucopiaMan
over a year ago

Bexley

It is interesting to note that the 'wanking dead' are always other men than those applying the term and they are nearly always better positioned in the queue for any action!

Wanking, yes, but not always that dead.

Their presence could be an indication of how driven they are to seek sex when in an environment which offers a glimmer of hope. Rather like the glimmer of hope offered by this site!

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By *iss LovelyWoman
over a year ago

Here and There

"It is interesting to note that the 'wanking dead' are always other men than those applying the term and they are nearly always better positioned in the queue for any action!

Wanking, yes, but not always that dead.

Their presence could be an indication of how driven they are to seek sex when in an environment which offers a glimmer of hope. Rather like the glimmer of hope offered by this site!"

I don’t think there’s a ‘could’ about it. I’d say it’s definitely an indication of how driven they are. That drive often seems to overtake anything and everyone else. Even when really there is no hope, people are just enjoying being watched.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And there are the hungry wanking dead too.

Many people just have no clue about respect anymore. Same reason so many talk in cinemas or theatres.

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By *ickNick500Man
over a year ago

Herts

"And there are the hungry wanking dead too.

Was at Kestrels very recently with a dear friend. We were shocked and highly amused in equal measures when one of the wanking dead appeared at the bar with a Pot Noodle - and the barman filled it up with hot water for him!

Chicken and mushroom if anyone needs to know

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By *lik and PaulCouple
over a year ago

Flagrante

"We only go to clubs, mainly Chams in Darlaston ( but have been to many others) generally, we have found the majority of single guys are very polite and not too rude or “in you face” we have had the odd few followers, but a simple “no thanks” & they generally leave us alone. We’re not averse to single guys, infact, depending on how we feel at the time we welcome 1 or more… but it has normally always been, can we join/are you ok if I touch. We have seen the “WD” & generally steer clear of those. Most couples, IMO know these sort & keep a distance from them & the couples that, like us, like a single guy to sometimes join us, will find the undead and have a fun time"

This is pretty much our experience too. It's a shame when something negative happens as it basically stops us being interested in sharing at that point and will use lockable rooms for the rest of the visit. It's rare though and in 10 years its maybe happened 3 times.

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By *hriscaroline36Couple
over a year ago

Treharris

You aren't changing this now, if it isn't you don't get sensitive, if it is then change. We even taught the phrase to a bunch of Americans at Hedonism in Jamaica last week and they were openly using it as if they had been forever by the end of the week

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By *illingdon_ladMan
over a year ago

Bicester

This, as well as the ones that just whip their cocks out without even saying "hello" and either start playing with themselves or expect to be invited to play just because they have a cock.

These responses cover EXACTLY why we won't ever do the club scene. Yuck.

D x"

So you wouldn't do the whole club scene because of a few bad eggs? You realise this is a minority of people who act like this. Not all clubs are the same and generally doesn't happen especially on couples nights.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This, as well as the ones that just whip their cocks out without even saying "hello" and either start playing with themselves or expect to be invited to play just because they have a cock.

These responses cover EXACTLY why we won't ever do the club scene. Yuck.

D x

It maybe only a few bad eggs but the experience is enough to put people off.

It's only happened to me once but it was enough to put me off going back to clubs

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By *pankingNorfolkCouple
over a year ago

Norwichish

Have definitely seen our fair share of the WD, but also our fair share of the voyeur types as well, much rmore our cup of tea so to speak.

One funny experience at the attic recently we were in school room, and we were in the middle of a punishment scene, one younger lad pushed past a few others to see what people were watching.

He nearly got hid by my paddle on the upstroke, and he turned about face and ran out the room after the sound of the downstroke

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By *uby RougeWoman
over a year ago

East Midlands

Ohhhh love the description!

I've come across quite few over the years. It's really adept for these idiots that spoils things for everyone!

I had an awful encounter with a wanking dead. It was a man wearing a guy fawkes mask coming in when I was on the swing at Xtasia which was a quite vulnerable position for me. He was told to go away so he did. Then he tried his luck again when the session was done, he got the clear go away and my trademark evil look.

I also reported him to a bouncer and he really made me feel safe when we left the club as he was hanging around outside.

Shame these guys spoils it for others

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By *teve321Man
over a year ago

Waltham cross

Chomping on a twix....quality lol

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By *otInventedHereMan
over a year ago

West Midlands

"Chomping on a twix....quality lol"

I bet those were the only two fingers he got to put inside anything that night

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By *enleywoodsCouple
over a year ago

Stourbridge / Oxford

New to this and this was our first experience. Sitting in the bar and a guy comes and sits near us, cock out and wanking while staring at her tits and what he could see of her cunt (not much). Not a word to us at all. Total stranger. He really was struggling to get it even semi hard! Why? We walked away.

There are good men though, so the term should be reserved for those who earn it.

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By *r-8-BBCMan
over a year ago

LONDON

"Chomping on a twix....quality lol

I bet those were the only two fingers he got to put inside anything that night

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By *otlovefun42Couple
over a year ago

Costa Blanca Spain...

"I use the wanking dead to describe the wanking dead.

A single male isn't a wanking dead if he doesn't act like it."

Exactly what we think.

The wanking dead are not just a UK phenomenon. We've seen plenty in German, Spanish and French clubs as well.

Thankfully there are also lots of decent guys that the name does not apply to.

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By *inkForLifeCouple
over a year ago

North Shields

What I'd say is that not all clubs are the same. I've never experienced this in our local club. You'd look so out of place doing this that I doubt anyone would as you'd probably be laughed at. Also, they have a no play in bar rule.

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By *estinyIsAllCouple
over a year ago

Staffordshire

This, as well as the ones that just whip their cocks out without even saying "hello" and either start playing with themselves or expect to be invited to play just because they have a cock.

These responses cover EXACTLY why we won't ever do the club scene. Yuck.

D x

Yes, that's exactly why. Regardless whether it's a few or a lot, if there's people who don't respect boundaries then we aren't going to put ourselves in that situation. Looking through other replies, we aren't alone in that either. It's grotesque in my opinion. The club scene is scary enough for newbies, this sort of thing is one of the reasons why.

D x

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

I go on Wednesdays and am more than happy to talk to single respectful guys. In fact my regular playmate was one.

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By *unner6969Man
over a year ago

Bucks/London/Oxford

Are you the type who gets in people's faces jerking the gerkin? or are you respectful and will interact with people? If your the latter then your unlikely to be seen with any disdain. "

I’m very much the latter, no desire to wank in public, certainly enjoy a bit of voyeurism (who wouldn’t) but actually just want to interact (mentally and who knows, physically) with like-minded souls.

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By *unner6969Man
over a year ago

Bucks/London/Oxford

There are good men though, so the term should be reserved for those who earn it. "

Puts me off clubs all together - I know there will be good people there but the low-lifes that clubs will attract scare me away.

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

The last 2 clubs we have been to, Carberry's and the Vanilla Alternative hae one thing in common, no wanking dead. Not all clubs are the same.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We attended our first club last night,pandora. In all honesty the men were more polite and friendly than the couples! We went into the hot tub with two guys and they even offered to turn away while the ladies got dressed down. They kept asking how we were doing when we saw them around the corridors and even asked permission to watch us when the door was open! I don't know if this was because it was a quiet night or we just met some absolutely sound guys. But I think the term the wanking dead is extremely harsh and gives nice polite single men like this an unfair name.

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

"But I think the term the wanking dead is extremely harsh and gives nice polite single men like this an unfair name.

But it doesn't apply to the well behaved

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By *aucasian GhandiMan
over a year ago

from my dad's left nut (Warwick)

If men behave like a dickhead, get dickhead consequences innit.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If men behave like a dickhead, get dickhead consequences innit.....

Exactly

Chat shit get banged!

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By *wisted999Man
over a year ago

North Bucks

How about towel tuggers?

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By *entle_lover_xMan
over a year ago

Great Dunmow

"We attended our first club last night,pandora. In all honesty the men were more polite and friendly than the couples! We went into the hot tub with two guys and they even offered to turn away while the ladies got dressed down. They kept asking how we were doing when we saw them around the corridors and even asked permission to watch us when the door was open! I don't know if this was because it was a quiet night or we just met some absolutely sound guys. But I think the term the wanking dead is extremely harsh and gives nice polite single men like this an unfair name.

I hear what you are saying and it’s a bit like the sometimes blanket criticisms thrown at men on Fab. The plus though for the nice polite respectful single men is that so much easier to stand out - here and in real life

. Thank fuck that large chunk of single men behave like morons. I might be screwed otherwise

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By *iss LovelyWoman
over a year ago

Here and There

Nice polite men aren’t referred to as the wanking dead

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By *arte_Blanche_NECouple
over a year ago

Northern

It’s the sound of the locker key jangling that’s scarred me, every time next doors cat jumps over our wall I have to look over my shoulder

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By *iddle ManMan
over a year ago

Walsall

It is not a flattering description, but you do see them a t clubs and events. They walk around making no attempt to interact with others, I know not everyone has that confidence.

As long as they are not causing anyone harm or getting too ott for a voyeur then maybe it's ok, just have a better way to describe them.

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By *ormalfornorfolkMan
over a year ago

Norwich

Someone ought to turn that into a film franchise.

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

Got to admit, dead does imply no thought at all, now Zombies implies no cognitive, or congruent behaviour.

Let’s go with Zombies and let them drop dead.

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By *unner6969Man
over a year ago

Bucks/London/Oxford

"…

Nice polite men aren’t referred to as the wanking dead"

Yet as a single male it feels like it is applied to any single man… puts me off going to a club.

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By *anted by NightMan
over a year ago

Shangri-La

"…

Nice polite men aren’t referred to as the wanking dead

Yet as a single male it feels like it is applied to any single man… puts me off going to a club."

Mostly from male half of couple with insecurity issues

I have seen worst behaviour from male half who think they are entitled and thrown out of clubs because of their behaviour.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"…

Nice polite men aren’t referred to as the wanking dead

Yet as a single male it feels like it is applied to any single man… puts me off going to a club.

Mostly from male half of couple with insecurity issues

I have seen worst behaviour from male half who think they are entitled and thrown out of clubs because of their behaviour. "

In terms of the point you are trying to make this is poetically ironic

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By *entle_lover_xMan
over a year ago

Great Dunmow

"…

Nice polite men aren’t referred to as the wanking dead

Yet as a single male it feels like it is applied to any single man… puts me off going to a club."

It really isn’t. I have been called many things but never the wanking dead. If you are a decent respectful man go along and see.

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By *enSiskoMan
over a year ago

Cestus 3

"…

Nice polite men aren’t referred to as the wanking dead

Yet as a single male it feels like it is applied to any single man… puts me off going to a club.

From all the comments these men exist I have no reason not to believe this as so many comment.

Due to that I wouldn't go to a club repetitions can be left in tatters from a misconception or I may talk to a guy who is considered wanking dead and then I am tainted with the title.

not for me I am afraid, but I understand the O.P and that's his kink and as this is fab he should be able to comment.

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By *antric bi subMan
over a year ago

London and elsewhere

It's an unfortunate sobriquet.

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By *luefire2Couple
over a year ago

just somewhere around here

Until these type of men start to behave themselves and have some respect for space and understanding that no means no....then we will continue to call them the wanking dead.

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By *entle_lover_xMan
over a year ago

Great Dunmow

"…

Nice polite men aren’t referred to as the wanking dead

Yet as a single male it feels like it is applied to any single man… puts me off going to a club.

From all the comments these men exist I have no reason not to believe this as so many comment.

Due to that I wouldn't go to a club repetitions can be left in tatters from a misconception or I may talk to a guy who is considered wanking dead and then I am tainted with the title.

not for me I am afraid, but I understand the O.P and that's his kink and as this is fab he should be able to comment."

You are overthinking this. Of course don't go a club or party if you don't wish but don't let the term and your potential reputational damage put you off. If you behave yourself then you will be fine. Just to make clear there is not a central dossier of wanking dead men and once on the list you are doomed to swinging hell for eternity

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

Polite single men aren't referred to as the wanking dead, the ones walking around wanking over anything and anyone are.

If the shoe fits and all that.

Mrs

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By *he fab twoCouple
over a year ago

brentwood

I actually like men wanking off looking at my wife

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By *enSiskoMan
over a year ago

Cestus 3

"…

Nice polite men aren’t referred to as the wanking dead

Yet as a single male it feels like it is applied to any single man… puts me off going to a club.

From all the comments these men exist I have no reason not to believe this as so many comment.

Due to that I wouldn't go to a club repetitions can be left in tatters from a misconception or I may talk to a guy who is considered wanking dead and then I am tainted with the title.

not for me I am afraid, but I understand the O.P and that's his kink and as this is fab he should be able to comment.

Thanks and I understand your view.

Full on it can be in here and how some people will just make up their mind or stereotype me as I am a single male.

So many threads staging off single men, it is a no from me I am afraid, plus I would be paying for that risk.

I have said before it is not a good advert to see single men slagged off, have a name attached to them, who would want to meet people who have such a view.

No not for me sorry.

I do ok outside of fab.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Polite single men aren't referred to as the wanking dead, the ones walking around wanking over anything and anyone are.

If the shoe fits and all that.

Mrs "

So true. Nothing worse than under the towel wankers walking past people trying to get their cock some attention.

Sadly the Wanking Dead or Towel Wankers are NOT SWINGERS they are just trying their luck at anything they can get!

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By *enSiskoMan
over a year ago

Cestus 3

Polite single men aren't referred to as the wanking dead, the ones walking around wanking over anything and anyone are.

If the shoe fits and all that.

Mrs

So true. Nothing worse than under the towel wankers walking past people trying to get their cock some attention.

Sadly the Wanking Dead or Towel Wankers are NOT SWINGERS they are just trying their luck at anything they can get!

I think without them some clubs wouldn't survive as they pay through the nose and others get in for a fair price, but that is not seen.

Such a good advert for guys who would not even consider doing such a thing, just drives decent ones away.

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By *ornucopiaMan
over a year ago

Bexley

"…

...Just to make clear there is not a central dossier of wanking dead men and once on the list you are doomed to swinging hell for eternity

Maybe not a central dossier but almost certainly some local ones in existence!

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"…

Nice polite men aren’t referred to as the wanking dead

Yet as a single male it feels like it is applied to any single man… puts me off going to a club."

But if you went to a club … you’d notice the difference…

Call it the difference between saying hello to people, as opposed to walking around like a lost lamb wearing grooves into the carpet keeping walking around…

Even by just saying hello to people you don’t realise how you stand out even in a positive way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"…

Nice polite men aren’t referred to as the wanking dead

Yet as a single male it feels like it is applied to any single man… puts me off going to a club.

But if you went to a club … you’d notice the difference…

Call it the difference between saying hello to people, as opposed to walking around like a lost lamb wearing grooves into the carpet keeping walking around…

Even by just saying hello to people you don’t realise how you stand out even in a positive way "

This guy gets it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Until these type of men start to behave themselves and have some respect for space and understanding that no means no....then we will continue to call them the wanking dead."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"…

Nice polite men aren’t referred to as the wanking dead

Yet as a single male it feels like it is applied to any single man… puts me off going to a club.

But if you went to a club … you’d notice the difference…

Call it the difference between saying hello to people, as opposed to walking around like a lost lamb wearing grooves into the carpet keeping walking around…

Even by just saying hello to people you don’t realise how you stand out even in a positive way "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've been to many different clubs and yes there are a few guys who either don't know how to behave properly or just expect something to happen if they've paid there money.at places like the attic or angels and sinners too many guys surround couples as soon as they walk through the door and the couples end up leaving because it's unpleasant.respectful guys will give them space and let them feel relaxed and if they want to play with others they will let you know.if not then just keep a distance from them and leave them be.i do feel for them when like others have said as soon as they get up and go out of a room a load of guys will follow them.and a few who think it's ok to touch someone without asking should be instantly banned.

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By *ornywelsh2sumCouple
over a year ago

Neath valley.

So please, have some sympathy and empathy for those whose sexuality is different to yours

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So please, have some sympathy and empathy for those whose sexuality is different to yours

If you were a cpl being followed around by these men wherever you go in a club you would think this description is spot on op. Also some of these have tried to grope me whilst passing on staircases ect. Very apt discription for them."
yes think that's totally unacceptable.some guys ,luckily not that many,do think that if people are in a club or sauna then they are there for one thing only and do think it's ok to just touch someone.i don't like causing a scene but think "no mate that's not on" I've even seen guys who even though they've been told no will still try to push their luck.these guys spoil it for everyone else.luckily in clubs and saunas I have been staff have quickly acted on any bad behaviour.but guys please treat everyone with respect.x

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By *ragon007Man
over a year ago

london

I think the trend started couple of years ago where people thought it was ok to wank when some one is playing I have not seen this before that in clubs or parties

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By *enSiskoMan
over a year ago

Cestus 3

So these walking dead guys, why are they tolerated , are they banned for groping, I imagine they return to do the same thing again or just visit other clubs.

I do not know as I don't go, so help me out.

What are the punishment for the things they do, outside of clubs if these guys act like they do in clubs they be in court, cancelled, sacked from their employment.

I have yet to read what gently they pay except to be kicked out for a night.

please let me know are the police called as it is criminal what they are doing?

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

"I think the trend started couple of years ago where people thought it was ok to wank when some one is playing I have not seen this before that in clubs or parties "

More than a couple of years, they were about in fetish clubs in the 90s

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By *ornucopiaMan
over a year ago

Bexley

"So these walking dead guys, why are they tolerated , are they banned for groping, I imagine they return to do the same thing again or just visit other clubs.

I do not know as I don't go, so help me out.

What are the punishment for the things they do, outside of clubs if these guys act like they do in clubs they be in court, cancelled, sacked from their employment.

I have yet to read what gently they pay except to be kicked out for a night.

please let me know are the police called as it is criminal what they are doing?"

I am sure that, not only are they meted out severe punishment by the clubs, they are, where appropriate, dealt with by the utmost rigour of the law.

Alternatively,maybe you could consider private legal action.

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By *enSiskoMan
over a year ago

Cestus 3

"So these walking dead guys, why are they tolerated , are they banned for groping, I imagine they return to do the same thing again or just visit other clubs.

I do not know as I don't go, so help me out.

What are the punishment for the things they do, outside of clubs if these guys act like they do in clubs they be in court, cancelled, sacked from their employment.

I have yet to read what gently they pay except to be kicked out for a night.

please let me know are the police called as it is criminal what they are doing?

I am sure that, not only are they meted out severe punishment by the clubs, they are, where appropriate, dealt with by the utmost rigour of the law.

Alternatively,maybe you could consider private legal action."

thanks

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West

"So these walking dead guys, why are they tolerated , are they banned for groping, I imagine they return to do the same thing again or just visit other clubs.

I do not know as I don't go, so help me out.

What are the punishment for the things they do, outside of clubs if these guys act like they do in clubs they be in court, cancelled, sacked from their employment.

I have yet to read what gently they pay except to be kicked out for a night.

please let me know are the police called as it is criminal what they are doing?"

I think it’s quite important to separate the “wanking dead” from people touching without permission.

For me, the wanking dead are the guys playing with themselves at a decent distance in open play areas- totally acceptable IMO.

People touching without permission, intimidating and following people should be dealt with totally separately.

Experienced hosts and good clubs rarely have many wanking dead as they get to know the people on their guest lists. More so happens on open entry evenings.

The other, should be reported and banned. As I know some hosts/ clubs have