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Lack of etiquette… the creepy guys need to learn.

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By *afksed OP   Man
over a year ago

Birmingham

Morning all.

Too early for a question on club etiquette?

So I took a friend to Xtasia and, just as I expected, she loved it..

But.

One single guy parks himself by the double doors to the playrooms and within ten seconds of any couple going in, follows them in. You/they don’t even get the chance to settle (we like to check the height of the beds for ergonomic reasons). It would be nice to at least get a second to settle.

Another guy just prowls, while a further sneaks up to closed doors so he can try to peak in through keyholes of listen. Closed doors.

Yes, clubs are about sharing but this felt like stray dogs begging for scraps or worse seagulls trying to steal your ice cream!

I’ve been a single guy at clubs so do have some sympathy, but I watched couples leave the play areas because of these carrion.

They detract from the experience rather than add to it.

Don’t get me wrong, we love having people watch and ask to join us, but come on…

I really don’t want to have call these numpties out because single men - and I am one often too - are needed. But decorum, please.

My companion had her first time with me in her mouth and another cock in each hand. She loved it. But as she said to me, no way would she want to do that for ‘the creepy guys.’

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Maybe in future you could go on a couples only night ?

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By *afksed OP   Man
over a year ago

Birmingham


"Maybe in future you could go on a couples only night ?"

I hear what you are saying however we want there to be single men because single men are important! But there has to be an understanding of the nuances of how to behave. The guys that joined in were upfront and were rewarded for it. They weren’t trying to steal their way in.

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By *hellebelleWoman
over a year ago

ashford


"Maybe in future you could go on a couples only night ?

I hear what you are saying however we want there to be single men because single men are important! But there has to be an understanding of the nuances of how to behave. The guys that joined in were upfront and were rewarded for it. They weren’t trying to steal their way in."

I totally agree with you.

I used to work at a lifestyle club behind the main bar and lost count of the times I had to inform single men that just because they paid their entrance fee it did not guarantee them a shag!

One guy one particular day even had the gall to ask if he could fuck me then asked for a refund when I said no (after being there for 4 hours) because he never got to have sex.

I told him if he wanted a guaranteed shag he should have just paid a working girl.

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By *afksed OP   Man
over a year ago

Birmingham


"Maybe in future you could go on a couples only night ?

I hear what you are saying however we want there to be single men because single men are important! But there has to be an understanding of the nuances of how to behave. The guys that joined in were upfront and were rewarded for it. They weren’t trying to steal their way in.

I totally agree with you.

I used to work at a lifestyle club behind the main bar and lost count of the times I had to inform single men that just because they paid their entrance fee it did not guarantee them a shag!

One guy one particular day even had the gall to ask if he could fuck me then asked for a refund when I said no (after being there for 4 hours) because he never got to have sex.

I told him if he wanted a guaranteed shag he should have just paid a working girl.

"

“Getting to have sex” is tragically funny.

I cannot remember a single occasion in my life when I got to have sex!

i can remember when I used to get a little toy at the bottom of a box of Shreddies…

I can remember those CDs you used to get the the Sunday newspapers…

I can even remember getting an email from a Nigerian Prince once…

But I don’t recall ever getting sex.

If the opportunity to get sex ever arose, I don’t think I would want it…

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By *ittyandtheboyCouple
over a year ago

Behind the bike shed!

Unfortunately creepy behaviour happens in a lot of clubs. If you can, try and ignore it. Go into the lockable rooms or on nights which are more designed for couples.

One hilarious incident happened to us, we were playing with the door open to our room, the room also has a window with a curtain you can shut, it was open.

We gathered a few male watchers as well as some couples. When kitty and I had finished up, we started putting our clothes back on. As ‘the show was over’ all the watchers bar one guy drifted away. I went to the door and closed it saying ‘just gonna shut this as we’re changing’.

The guy then immediately legs it out down the corridor and round to the window, so I just drew the curtains in his face.

I genuinely think some people have no awareness of how they’re acting and how it looks to others!

Kitty in the past has been changing in the locker room into dress down stuff and guys have just stood gawping!

There’s a time and a place!

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By *exOnLegsPlymCouple
over a year ago

Plymouth

Here's a post about our experiences with "creepy men" in Paris...... Star City...... We've been to a lot of clubs and have to say we have never experienced single man behaviour quite as bad as Star City. The second we arrived, before the mrs had even undressed, we were mobbed by "helpful" singles. The rest of the time was the maddest suasage fest I've ever known.

Every where we went we had a tail of 6-7 desperate guys all w*nking madly. In the steam room a couple of them were actually trying to hump the mrs's leg. No or NON didn't seem to make any difference. In the end we had to shut ourselves in one of the private rooms, but not until I'd literally had to shove the guys out the door.

They were the losers though, as mrs might well have let one or two have a bit of fun but being mobbed really isn't nice. Its no wonder so many couples have a really negative view of single men.

btw We were aware that singles were allowed in the club and we don't mind the odd respectful single joining in, but were quite intrigued by all the talk about "bi-sexual" behaviour on the website as mrs likes to watch a bit of man on man.... never again though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Morning all.

Too early for a question on club etiquette?

So I took a friend to Xtasia and, just as I expected, she loved it..

But.

One single guy parks himself by the double doors to the playrooms and within ten seconds of any couple going in, follows them in. You/they don’t even get the chance to settle (we like to check the height of the beds for ergonomic reasons). It would be nice to at least get a second to settle.

Another guy just prowls, while a further sneaks up to closed doors so he can try to peak in through keyholes of listen. Closed doors.

Yes, clubs are about sharing but this felt like stray dogs begging for scraps or worse seagulls trying to steal your ice cream!

I’ve been a single guy at clubs so do have some sympathy, but I watched couples leave the play areas because of these carrion.

They detract from the experience rather than add to it.

Don’t get me wrong, we love having people watch and ask to join us, but come on…

I really don’t want to have call these numpties out because single men - and I am one often too - are needed. But decorum, please.

My companion had her first time with me in her mouth and another cock in each hand. She loved it. But as she said to me, no way would she want to do that for ‘the creepy guys.’

"

It’s a shame people think common courtesy goes out the window.

A simple, ‘Hi, I’m xxx, do you mind if I watch?’ doesn’t seem too difficult for me.

But then, hopefully I’m not creepy.

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By *ogloverMan
over a year ago

Worstead

Its not just swingers events in clubs where the single man peoblem occurs. Im into bdsm and have been to countless fetish events and sometimes you get the creepy invading your space guy, Ive had to stop a couple of play sessions because a guy got too close and made My sub feel uncomfortable. Regretably I didnt manage to catch these guys with the flogger I was using on the back swing!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We recently attended an event at Townhouse that was couples and single fems only. Unsurprisingly, this behaviour was nowhere to be seen. The evening was far more relaxed as a result. Couples only nights far better in our opinion

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By *ittyandtheboyCouple
over a year ago

Behind the bike shed!


"Its not just swingers events in clubs where the single man peoblem occurs. Im into bdsm and have been to countless fetish events and sometimes you get the creepy invading your space guy, Ive had to stop a couple of play sessions because a guy got too close and made My sub feel uncomfortable. Regretably I didnt manage to catch these guys with the flogger I was using on the back swing!"

The ones that touch my equipment piss me off no end!

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By *eandmrsjones69Couple
over a year ago

Middle England

A few times we've been playing (and yes we do liked being watched) but then guys just start to approach and without a word just start undoing their trousers and cock in hand.

Surely 'Can I join in?' or just a querying look/gesture wouldn't be too much to ask. Or are we expecting too much?!?!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We recently attended an event at Townhouse that was couples and single fems only. Unsurprisingly, this behaviour was nowhere to be seen. The evening was far more relaxed as a result. Couples only nights far better in our opinion "

Yeah. We had our first club experience Saturday and was couples and single females, really enjoyed it. Not sure we would do a single male one because A) that’s not what we are looking for and B) the above reasons!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We recently attended an event at Townhouse that was couples and single fems only. Unsurprisingly, this behaviour was nowhere to be seen. The evening was far more relaxed as a result. Couples only nights far better in our opinion

Yeah. We had our first club experience Saturday and was couples and single females, really enjoyed it. Not sure we would do a single male one because A) that’s not what we are looking for and B) the above reasons! "

Seconded

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By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester

Clubs can be just like vanilla pubs, they have people in them. On a recent club visit I relaxed in the toy room on big comfy sofas, or on a bench in the dungeon and just chatted to the people. I was aware of others just walking from room to room, but I get they can be nervous striking up a normal conversation, especially to a sexy woman in lingerie. There are some genuine creeps, but some of those may just be a bit scared.

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By *woforfun 1000Couple
over a year ago

surrey

We like playing with single guys and tbh while mid play I don’t want guys keep asking can I touch, can I join, I feel guys should stand back and watch if they want and if invited can join! If we want more to join we will ask! Dont stick ur dick in my face and hope for the best! This should be a rule in all clubs as in my opinion play shouldn’t be interrupted unless all involved are asking for it!

I’ve had guys stroking my feet while my man is down on me and I have to interrupt him to say tell that guy to go away and it completely kills the mood!

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By *aunchy RaccoonsCouple
over a year ago

Exeter

We just stick to couples only nights because of this sort of thing...but if you think they're bad in clubs, try going to Studland on a sunny day!

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"Morning all.

Too early for a question on club etiquette?

So I took a friend to Xtasia and, just as I expected, she loved it..

But.

One single guy parks himself by the double doors to the playrooms and within ten seconds of any couple going in, follows them in. You/they don’t even get the chance to settle (we like to check the height of the beds for ergonomic reasons). It would be nice to at least get a second to settle.

Another guy just prowls, while a further sneaks up to closed doors so he can try to peak in through keyholes of listen. Closed doors.

Yes, clubs are about sharing but this felt like stray dogs begging for scraps or worse seagulls trying to steal your ice cream!

I’ve been a single guy at clubs so do have some sympathy, but I watched couples leave the play areas because of these carrion.

They detract from the experience rather than add to it.

Don’t get me wrong, we love having people watch and ask to join us, but come on…

I really don’t want to have call these numpties out because single men - and I am one often too - are needed. But decorum, please.

My companion had her first time with me in her mouth and another cock in each hand. She loved it. But as she said to me, no way would she want to do that for ‘the creepy guys.’

"

Knowing the club well I'm pretty sure a simple word to staff (and there's always plenty about!) and your problem would have been solved.

Like you we prefer mixed nights because that's what we look for. We've had one bad experience in many, many visits and a quick word to staff sorted that out.

Yes there will always be the odd muppet, but they're usually the minority. As a suggestion try using the couples areas where single guys have to be invited to enter. That way they can look, but never touch.

And it's not an issue exclusive to men. Couples are often as guilty and even single women can get 'touchy' after a drink or two with no invite to do so.

A

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By *tasiaCouple
over a year ago

West Bromwich


"Morning all.

Too early for a question on club etiquette?

So I took a friend to Xtasia and, just as I expected, she loved it..

But.

One single guy parks himself by the double doors to the playrooms and within ten seconds of any couple going in, follows them in. You/they don’t even get the chance to settle (we like to check the height of the beds for ergonomic reasons). It would be nice to at least get a second to settle.

Another guy just prowls, while a further sneaks up to closed doors so he can try to peak in through keyholes of listen. Closed doors.

Yes, clubs are about sharing but this felt like stray dogs begging for scraps or worse seagulls trying to steal your ice cream!

I’ve been a single guy at clubs so do have some sympathy, but I watched couples leave the play areas because of these carrion.

They detract from the experience rather than add to it.

Don’t get me wrong, we love having people watch and ask to join us, but come on…

I really don’t want to have call these numpties out because single men - and I am one often too - are needed. But decorum, please.

My companion had her first time with me in her mouth and another cock in each hand. She loved it. But as she said to me, no way would she want to do that for ‘the creepy guys.’

"

Going to take on an "Educator" me thinks!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well, like you, we enjoy the presence of the single guys and much prefer those nights to couples nights.

We try (and I stress try) to be amused by it more than annoyed.

We’re not going to let a few knob heads ruin the fun for everyone.

Those guys are a million miles from any sort invitation.

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"Morning all.

Too early for a question on club etiquette?

So I took a friend to Xtasia and, just as I expected, she loved it..

But.

One single guy parks himself by the double doors to the playrooms and within ten seconds of any couple going in, follows them in. You/they don’t even get the chance to settle (we like to check the height of the beds for ergonomic reasons). It would be nice to at least get a second to settle.

Another guy just prowls, while a further sneaks up to closed doors so he can try to peak in through keyholes of listen. Closed doors.

Yes, clubs are about sharing but this felt like stray dogs begging for scraps or worse seagulls trying to steal your ice cream!

I’ve been a single guy at clubs so do have some sympathy, but I watched couples leave the play areas because of these carrion.

They detract from the experience rather than add to it.

Don’t get me wrong, we love having people watch and ask to join us, but come on…

I really don’t want to have call these numpties out because single men - and I am one often too - are needed. But decorum, please.

My companion had her first time with me in her mouth and another cock in each hand. She loved it. But as she said to me, no way would she want to do that for ‘the creepy guys.’

Going to take on an "Educator" me thinks! "

Can you not just have a hot domme wandering round with a crop and paddle or two for 'crowd control'......

A

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By *ornucopiaMan
over a year ago

Bexley


"

“Getting to have sex” is tragically funny.

I cannot remember a single occasion in my life when I got to have sex!

i can remember when I used to get a little toy at the bottom of a box of Shreddies…

I can remember those CDs you used to get the the Sunday newspapers…

I can even remember getting an email from a Nigerian Prince once…

But I don’t recall ever getting sex.

If the opportunity to get sex ever arose, I don’t think I would want it…

"

You must have been around at the wrong time in clubs. Sex isn't always just about giving. Sometimes there is some getting!!!

( I understand, of course, the point you were trying to make)

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By *afksed OP   Man
over a year ago

Birmingham


"

“Getting to have sex” is tragically funny.

I cannot remember a single occasion in my life when I got to have sex!

i can remember when I used to get a little toy at the bottom of a box of Shreddies…

I can remember those CDs you used to get the the Sunday newspapers…

I can even remember getting an email from a Nigerian Prince once…

But I don’t recall ever getting sex.

If the opportunity to get sex ever arose, I don’t think I would want it…

You must have been around at the wrong time in clubs. Sex isn't always just about giving. Sometimes there is some getting!!!

( I understand, of course, the point you were trying to make)"

Terribly sorry but I must respectfully disagree.

It’s a shared endeavour or not at all. Even when there is a shift in the balance it should be by agreement.

Nobody is getting from us nor should they. They can be involved or not.

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By *aulaxd2020TV/TS
over a year ago

Dudley


"Morning all.

Too early for a question on club etiquette?

So I took a friend to Xtasia and, just as I expected, she loved it..

But.

One single guy parks himself by the double doors to the playrooms and within ten seconds of any couple going in, follows them in. You/they don’t even get the chance to settle (we like to check the height of the beds for ergonomic reasons). It would be nice to at least get a second to settle.

Another guy just prowls, while a further sneaks up to closed doors so he can try to peak in through keyholes of listen. Closed doors.

Yes, clubs are about sharing but this felt like stray dogs begging for scraps or worse seagulls trying to steal your ice cream!

I’ve been a single guy at clubs so do have some sympathy, but I watched couples leave the play areas because of these carrion.

They detract from the experience rather than add to it.

Don’t get me wrong, we love having people watch and ask to join us, but come on…

I really don’t want to have call these numpties out because single men - and I am one often too - are needed. But decorum, please.

My companion had her first time with me in her mouth and another cock in each hand. She loved it. But as she said to me, no way would she want to do that for ‘the creepy guys.’

Going to take on an "Educator" me thinks!

Can you not just have a hot domme wandering round with a crop and paddle or two for 'crowd control'......

On one occasion I was having an intimate moment with someone in a room with door shut some bloke just walks in and started groping me, I get up and ask if he had permission to enter a locked room and touch me, I then hit him full force on his ass with my riding crop I’ve never seen anyone move so fast in my life ..... I know it’s a swingers club but blokes think it’s a free for all and have no manners whatsoever

A"

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