FabSwingers.com forum: What stops you from visiting a club?

By *aughtycp1 OP Couple
over a year ago

Leicestershire

A question for newbies to clubs. What is it that stops you making your first visit to a club?

For us it was the worry that we wouldn't know the protocols. We worried we would stick out as newbies. It wasn't like that at all when we first went inside.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nowadays it's the possibility of bumping into someone I've either fucked, ghosted or blocked.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We've never been, but off to Blackpool next month to try them out.

Can't wait.

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By *ottom charlieMan
over a year ago

washington

"A question for newbies to clubs. What is it that stops you making your first visit to a club?

For us it was the worry that we wouldn't know the protocols. We worried we would stick out as newbies. It wasn't like that at all when we first went inside."
cost of membership,, being just another single guy on his own,, being too old to get a possible invite to play,, think it would be like going into a toy shop and not being allowed to play with the toys

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By *easidersCouple
over a year ago

Wirral

Covid and fuel/accommodation costs.

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By *inxymadamWoman
over a year ago

newport

My age! I’m scared I’ll be seen as young fresh meat and won’t feel safe, especially as a single woman

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By *lavoMan
over a year ago

bristol

"My age! I’m scared I’ll be seen as young fresh meat and won’t feel safe, especially as a single woman "
. Don't think that way. no one can impose anything on you, force anything or laugh at you. in case of such behavior, you report it to the service.

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By *urora1912Woman
over a year ago

Norfolk East anglia

I've only been once and not sure they are for me.

I didnt want to go on my own as a single woman

So luckily went with someone I knew from fab.

But it was very overwhelming with all the looks and everyone wanting to talk to me as I was new

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

FB has bottled it twice and I am trying to pluck up my courage to go as a single female.

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By *tanMan
over a year ago

Leicetsershire

Just the fear of not knowing what to do or if I see someone I know

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By *tanMan
over a year ago

Leicetsershire

"My age! I’m scared I’ll be seen as young fresh meat and won’t feel safe, especially as a single woman "

I understand same, Iv seen a few clubs from out side and a lot older people was coming out. I do wonder if many young couples or singles go.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have visited two. The first one was incredibly cliquey and we felt very uncomfortable and we left within an hour. The second one was a fair drive away, but very well kept. We had met a few of the patrons before and had even played with one couple at a party, but they pretended they didn't know us. There were some single guys sat together in one corner and they just got ignored by everyone. Again our awkwardness took over and we made our excuses and went home. Probably not our natural environment.

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By *ilianBaldCouple
over a year ago

West Fife

We are the same. Not sure what to do or expect. It's a bit nerve wracking. What do you wear? Or not wear? Where do you go and what is there to do if your not partaking.

I really, really want to go to one but we are shy to begin with.

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By *itygamesMan
over a year ago

nerves, all arranged to go to one tonight but me bottles gone

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By *insationCouple
over a year ago

North West

We have not tried tried clubs yet, its on our list, but not something we want to rush into it.

Will probably love it when we do go to one though

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

We've been concerned that a place might be too full-on for Hannah's comfort. We don't want to be confronted by people having sex at every turn. We want to be able to dip into that side of things when we want to and remove ourselves completely when we want a bit of space.

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

The people and their body fluids.

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By *quirtyndirty!Couple
over a year ago

Nottingham

There are lots of lovely clubs and events where you can have social space. Been clubbing since June 21, have favourite clubs that are extremely clean, with extra products, very private and good social areas where people stay clothed and chat all night. Lots of youngsters go to big party events, older to more discerning clubs. Like any night out with clothes, you get young, old, bunch of single girls/boys. Don’t feel to much pressure to perform, just people watch, loads of genuine people to chat with, and no hidden agenda to rip your clothes off xx

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By *ellinever70Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

Nothing about them seems like the kind of environment I'd want to have sex in

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My age and being a Wall flower, left all alone

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

As someone who isn’t a newbie and More than comfortable at rocking up at a club on my own

I would say don’t expect sex, I may have a look around to see if anyone takes my fancy or ‘people watch’; I go to My regular club a couple of times a month.

For me, i don’t have a lady with me, so unless the couple are looking for single guy or it is a single woman, chances of playing are reduced. That’s fine.

I still get nervous from time to time and it’s part and parcel of the club scene

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you’re a single man and you arrive at a club then try to remember that those couples that you see have generally come along especially because it’s a single guys night.

All you have to do is have the courage to approach them and make polite and maybe flirty conversation and you might just be the guy they’re looking for!

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By *helroyCouple
over a year ago

Skegness

we going Blackpool in December we both wood like to go to one but we a bit uneasy going we wood love any advise

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By *randMrsNorthernCouple
over a year ago

Cheshire

Not been one since before Covid but:

(1) Single men and weirdos. Wanking zombies.

(2) Inappropriate touching (read a few reviews of late that mention this recently which is very alarming)

(3) People not our type (always a gamble whether anyone we like would be there so private meets often preferred)

(4) we have sometimes found clubs a bit cliquey

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My age! I’m scared I’ll be seen as young fresh meat and won’t feel safe, especially as a single woman "

In the right clubs you’ll find as a single woman you’ll be well looked after. I’ve gone alone and found people genuinely cared I was having a good time (with no agenda). I feel very safe at clubs.

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

But it was very overwhelming with all the looks and everyone wanting to talk to me as I was new

The exact opposite of being a single guy in a club! It’s like Moses parting the waves……

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nothing about them seems like the kind of environment I'd want to have sex in"

Same for us x

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By *eeliciouschaosWoman
over a year ago

Wherever

Been to the clubs before but only as a part of a couple.

Yet to find the courage to go on my own.

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By *he fab twoCouple
over a year ago

brentwood

"My age! I’m scared I’ll be seen as young fresh meat and won’t feel safe, especially as a single woman "

You’d be 100% safe I’m sure and if worries tell the club on entry and they will introduce you to some regulars to take you under there wing!

As for being fresh meat and everyone wanting you well there are worse problems to have lol

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By *he fab twoCouple
over a year ago

brentwood

"My age! I’m scared I’ll be seen as young fresh meat and won’t feel safe, especially as a single woman

Your right as a single women your much safer meeting there than a stranger somewhere alone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We stick to couples and single women nights, we've found everyone to be great fun and polite and met some really funny interesting people. I think like most things you will only ever get out what you put in, we were like everyone else at first, nervous and not knowing what to expect, now we will happily approach people and talk to them. We see it as a night out even if nothing happens x

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By *edonisthenryMan
over a year ago

Cambridge

I used to go to the clubs but haven't been for a while. My observations were that these clubs largely cater for couples looking for other couples, and for the single men like me the competition is fierce. The single man has to be exceptional to stand a chance. I did from time to time go with a lady who was new and the dynamic was very different. I nearly had sex with not just my Indian lady but also with her single Bangladeshi woman friend!! ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A question for newbies to clubs. What is it that stops you making your first visit to a club?

For us it was the worry that we wouldn't know the protocols. We worried we would stick out as newbies. It wasn't like that at all when we first went inside."

Distance! We live in a rural part of the country, visiting a club requires planning a night away

F (Mrs)

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By *edonisthenryMan
over a year ago

Cambridge

Good point.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For me it's membership cost and entrance fee for single guys also the way people even on here talk about us wanking dead plus loads on here moan we shouldn't be aloud in as we aren't swingers so I'll never enter as a customer.

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By *aughtycp1 OP Couple
over a year ago

Leicestershire

"We stick to couples and single women nights, we've found everyone to be great fun and polite and met some really funny interesting people. I think like most things you will only ever get out what you put in, we were like everyone else at first, nervous and not knowing what to expect, now we will happily approach people and talk to them. We see it as a night out even if nothing happens x"

We totally agree, you get out what you put in x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As a single female I’m shy about approaching people or been rejected myself but I’m biting the bullet and going to a club at the weekend it’s a party night too so I’m just going all in and hoping for the best thought why not just go for it

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By *orny DeucesCouple
over a year ago

Mansfield

We are co-hosting a social at a club next month. We have chosen a quiet night so it's a less intimidating environment for anyone interested:

https://m.fabswingers.com/forum/events/1346364

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By *aunchy RaccoonsCouple
over a year ago

Exeter

"My age! I’m scared I’ll be seen as young fresh meat and won’t feel safe, especially as a single woman "

If you go on a couples only night it's way less pressure. Single women are usually still allowed to attend them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Being a single guy of 49 and not having too much confidence, I'd be nervous

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By *tudentForFunMan
over a year ago

Craigavon

Age and autism lol

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"As a single female I’m shy about approaching people or been rejected myself but I’m biting the bullet and going to a club at the weekend it’s a party night too so I’m just going all in and hoping for the best thought why not just go for it "

You’ll be looked after, don’t worry. Single women are very much sought after in clubs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cost mostly

Nothing that close to me so could be an expensive night for a glass of orange juice and no chat

I can get that at my place

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As I crossdresser, im unsure if I would be welcome or find anyone to connect with.

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By *oved Up 2Couple
over a year ago

nottingham

"As I crossdresser, im unsure if I would be welcome or find anyone to connect with. "

Lots of clubs welcome cross dressers. Chams on a Monday is bi day/ night and often quite a few there

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By *orny DeucesCouple
over a year ago

Mansfield

"As I crossdresser, im unsure if I would be welcome or find anyone to connect with. "

The attic in derby Monday and Friday daytime is designated for TV/TS & CD. A few venture into Friday and Saturday nights.

Check the website, give the club a call and ask for sammie-jo she'll give you all the info.

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By *ogging DougMan
over a year ago

Guildford

Couples only night.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Much Appreciated

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 21/08/22 21:06:47]

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By *andSCouple
over a year ago

Old London Town

"My age! I’m scared I’ll be seen as young fresh meat and won’t feel safe, especially as a single woman "

The first few times we went we were seen as fresh meat and we get it’s daunting. Clubs can be so much fun, but we have also heard stories from people about not feeling safe in the early days. We’d say choose your club wisely and choose an event that suits your interests. We don’t go to the club that’s closest to us all of the time our favourite club is a couple of hours drive from us.

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By *tanMan
over a year ago

Leicetsershire

Hi which clubs can we go and keep our clothes on please ? Thanks

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By *aughtycp1 OP Couple
over a year ago

Leicestershire

"My age! I’m scared I’ll be seen as young fresh meat and won’t feel safe, especially as a single woman

Choosing your club wisely and the event is excellent advice. We are hosting a special night for Couples who are new to the club scene. It's called Vanilla To Vixen on Saturday 17th September. At Liberty Elite in Leicestershire.

A special night where you can hang out with us and just relax and enjoy all the surroundings of this luxurious club x

Mrs N

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By *andSCouple
over a year ago

Old London Town

"Hi which clubs can we go and keep our clothes on please ? Thanks "

There’s quite a few. The closest one to you may be Jaydees. Excellent club with great facilities, great hosts and staff and generally a great group of guys and gals who go there. We always enjoy our nights there.

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By *weetCruellaWoman
over a year ago

somewhere sweet and sour

I really enjoy going to club and have been to a couple of socials at my nearest one. I've started recognising regular faces, and that always helps to just get a convo going.

What would put me off, is if there was a lot of bad reviews, and if the place didn't have good security.

Also if your feet stuck to the carpet ..yack lol

Unwanted attention is a big bugbear... they just assume because you're at a club, you're game. Nope and nope, (but my resting bitch face may keep them at bay) lmao

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By *ethnmelvCouple
over a year ago

Cardiff

"If you’re a single man and you arrive at a club then try to remember that those couples that you see have generally come along especially because it’s a single guys night.

All you have to do is have the courage to approach them and make polite and maybe flirty conversation and you might just be the guy they’re looking for!"

Absolutely spot on! When you are a couple at a mixed night, it is not easy to say hello to all of the guys. Come and say hello, talk to both of us, yes be flirty (maybe only with one of us!!) but don’t expect immediate action. Sometimes we might be up for it, other times we might want to think about it. We are essentially all there because we are at least interested in the prospect of having sex with others - if we manage to click, then it could be you!

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By *ocothumpaMan
over a year ago

Herts

As a single guy my first visit was a bit nerve wracking:

I felt like an outsider, until I got into conversation with this guy who funnily enough made me realise that if I acted like him I would be ostracised all night. So I did the opposite and had much better luck.

I then started to go to a particular night and became a bit of a face, was in the main clique (which single guys is unfortunately where you want to be as it’s like an automatic vetting for couples and single women). I then stopped going to this night returned after a year or so and found I was soo far out of the clique I was basically a newbie again.

Recently I think the issue is the scene has changed greatly: it is more dominated by couples and also it’s much more of a social networking thing that you can run the risk of turning into a ‘wanking zombie’ also single guys get gouged by the entrance fees (‘ Single ladies: Free, Couples: £20 Single Guys: £50’)

Lastly - I get bored easily. Soo I might take extended breaks from going and just go very Vanilla and have a nice quite drink with friends or stay at home with streams

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By *oungnhung17Man
over a year ago

near u

"As a single guy my first visit was a bit nerve wracking:

Lastly - I get bored easily. Soo I might take extended breaks from going and just go very Vanilla and have a nice quite drink with friends or stay at home with streams "

Sounds like good and honest advice

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By *ethnmelvCouple
over a year ago

Cardiff

"As a single guy my first visit was a bit nerve wracking:

Lastly - I get bored easily. Soo I might take extended breaks from going and just go very Vanilla and have a nice quite drink with friends or stay at home with streams

Sounds like good and honest advice "

I think its an opinion, not sure about the advice bit. But we all have our own experiences - we’ve never had a bad night in a Club and have talked with many people

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By *reston_SmallGirlCouple
over a year ago

Preston

For us, work is all consuming at the moment and we are out of shape.

Hopefully we sort that by the end of next year so we feel relaxed enough to attend.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m worried I’ll have no idea about the signs though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think due to a lack of experience in clubs I’m nervous about being a single guy and others thinking I’m just some wannabe watcher or something.

I am useless at reading the signs that’s it’s ok to chat or join or anything

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By *eyeYCouple
over a year ago

Nr Leicester

Absolutely nothing

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By *eyeYCouple
over a year ago

Nr Leicester

"Hi which clubs can we go and keep our clothes on please ? Thanks "

Any!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The reasons that most men who can’t accommodate are on here for.

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By *jonesMan
over a year ago

Plymouth

Cornwall is devoid of clubs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As is Devon bar 1 which isn’t swinging at all as they allow kids and families

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By *ocothumpaMan
over a year ago

Herts

"As a single guy my first visit was a bit nerve wracking:

Lastly - I get bored easily. Soo I might take extended breaks from going and just go very Vanilla and have a nice quite drink with friends or stay at home with streams

Sounds like good and honest advice

I think its an opinion, not sure about the advice bit. But we all have our own experiences - we’ve never had a bad night in a Club and have talked with many people

Bit of both. Though experiences for single guys is fairly universal - as it’s hard to shake off a bit of a stigma as a single guy.

Couples are more approachable

Single women more desirable

Single guys are sometimes just walking cocks both figuratively and metaphorically and can be seen as desperate

And as it’s very evident why they’re (we’re) there it can be ‘oddly off-putting’ hence why couples hook up with couples even though they’re there for the same thing the single guys are there for (a man with a woman apart less ‘desperate’ even though he can be just as much of a walking wanking zombie)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We visited a club recently and found it wasn't for us. It was very clicky with regulars, we just felt uncomfortable. And the single guys were letching and following us around to the point where she didn't want to go to the ladies on her own ir was that bad.

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By *eyeYCouple
over a year ago

Nr Leicester

"We visited a club recently and found it wasn't for us. It was very clicky with regulars, we just felt uncomfortable. And the single guys were letching and following us around to the point where she didn't want to go to the ladies on her own ir was that bad. "

In fairness that's a fair point! Our first experience would possibly have been a flop (no pun intended) if it hadn't been for a couple we recognised from here walking in.. The wanking dead we're a little off putting as well..

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By *rAndMiss271Couple
over a year ago

Bristol

Men

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"As a single guy my first visit was a bit nerve wracking:

Lastly - I get bored easily. Soo I might take extended breaks from going and just go very Vanilla and have a nice quite drink with friends or stay at home with streams

Sounds like good and honest advice

I think its an opinion, not sure about the advice bit. But we all have our own experiences - we’ve never had a bad night in a Club and have talked with many people

You're a couple though, and clubs are basically, for couples to meet other couples.

I can relate to feeling like an outsider as a solo guy in clubs, witnessing the cliques, and getting bored to the point of leaving early.

Of all the threads you'll read in the forum, about how friendly and welcoming people are (towards single guys), I've yet to meet any of these people in any club (but I've only been to 7)

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By *elnkazCouple
over a year ago

cheshire

Dont ever be put off going to a club for any reason. Most clubs will make you feel really welcome and tell you the protocols of their club. You can also look at club pages on here and give them a call to speak to someone. Which ever club you decide to go. anybody. Enjoy

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By *elnkazCouple
over a year ago

cheshire

"As a single guy my first visit was a bit nerve wracking:

Lastly - I get bored easily. Soo I might take extended breaks from going and just go very Vanilla and have a nice quite drink with friends or stay at home with streams

Sounds like good and honest advice

I think its an opinion, not sure about the advice bit. But we all have our own experiences - we’ve never had a bad night in a Club and have talked with many people

You're a couple though, and clubs are basically, for couples to meet other couples.

I can relate to feeling like an outsider as a solo guy in clubs, witnessing the cliques, and getting bored to the point of leaving early.

Of all the threads you'll read in the forum, about how friendly and welcoming people are (towards single guys), I've yet to meet any of these people in any club (but I've only been to 7)

No they are not. You cant make that assumption about clubs or couples.. we for one arent lookimg for other couples. K

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By *reston_SmallGirlCouple
over a year ago

Preston

Tbh the main draw for the wife in terms of clubs are the "wanking dead" as you call it. She loves that whole seedy feeling atmosphere.

Saying that, we haven't visited one yet so our view isn't really worth anything ATM haha :D

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By *elnkazCouple
over a year ago

cheshire

"Tbh the main draw for the wife in terms of clubs are the "wanking dead" as you call it. She loves that whole seedy feeling atmosphere.

Saying that, we haven't visited one yet so our view isn't really worth anything ATM haha :D"
understand what you mean by the wanking dead.. but a polite excuse me do you mimd. Usually works

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By *otBrunetteHimCouple
over a year ago

birmingham

Meeting someone we know, although we would be there for the same reason its not something we advertise to everyone

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"As a single guy my first visit was a bit nerve wracking:

Lastly - I get bored easily. Soo I might take extended breaks from going and just go very Vanilla and have a nice quite drink with friends or stay at home with streams

Sounds like good and honest advice

I think its an opinion, not sure about the advice bit. But we all have our own experiences - we’ve never had a bad night in a Club and have talked with many people

You're a couple though, and clubs are basically, for couples to meet other couples.

I can relate to feeling like an outsider as a solo guy in clubs, witnessing the cliques, and getting bored to the point of leaving early.

Of all the threads you'll read in the forum, about how friendly and welcoming people are (towards single guys), I've yet to meet any of these people in any club (but I've only been to 7)

No they are not. You cant make that assumption about clubs or couples.. we for one arent lookimg for other couples. K"

It's not an assumption, it's based on my experiences of the club scene. I have shared great nights with couples, don't get me wrong, but I've received far more "We're not interested in single guys thanks", and precious few single women in a club....

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By *ornucopiaMan
over a year ago

Bexley

"Hi which clubs can we go and keep our clothes on please ? Thanks "

One problem with 'keeping your clothes on' is that many other participants quite reasonably assume that you haven't taken a shower before entering the fray.

Whilst wearing a towel is no absolute proof of showering, it is a better bet than looking like you have come straight from the car after a long sweaty drive with maybe a couple of unwashed piss stops on the way.

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By *helroyCouple
over a year ago

Skegness

Having read all the posts we now thinking it's not for us to go to a club

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By *arciocialWoman
over a year ago

Leicester

"Hi which clubs can we go and keep our clothes on please ? Thanks

One problem with 'keeping your clothes on' is that many other participants quite reasonably assume that you haven't taken a shower before entering the fray.

No they don't. There are many clubs where clothes stay on unti some may choose to take them off eg xtasia, the attic, amigos, townhouse, cupids many more

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By *elnkazCouple
over a year ago

cheshire

"As a single guy my first visit was a bit nerve wracking:

Lastly - I get bored easily. Soo I might take extended breaks from going and just go very Vanilla and have a nice quite drink with friends or stay at home with streams

Sounds like good and honest advice

I think its an opinion, not sure about the advice bit. But we all have our own experiences - we’ve never had a bad night in a Club and have talked with many people

You're a couple though, and clubs are basically, for couples to meet other couples.

I can relate to feeling like an outsider as a solo guy in clubs, witnessing the cliques, and getting bored to the point of leaving early.

Of all the threads you'll read in the forum, about how friendly and welcoming people are (towards single guys), I've yet to meet any of these people in any club (but I've only been to 7)

No they are not. You cant make that assumption about clubs or couples.. we for one arent lookimg for other couples. K

Youre obviously not attending the right club or on the right nights

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By *elnkazCouple
over a year ago

cheshire

"Having read all the posts we now thinking it's not for us to go to a club "

Guys dont let what you read on here put you off. Everyone is just giving their own opinion. Go. See for yourselves if you dont like it then you can say youve tried .k

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By *arciocialWoman
over a year ago

Leicester

"My age! I’m scared I’ll be seen as young fresh meat and won’t feel safe, especially as a single woman

I understand same, Iv seen a few clubs from out side and a lot older people was coming out. I do wonder if many young couples or singles go. "

Yes they do.

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By *arciocialWoman
over a year ago

Leicester

On here it seems many don't want to go because they don't know what it'll be like. To put it simply it'll be like a night at pub with rooms dotted about so people don't have to take anyone home if they pull but you may also see people getting up to stuff.

There will be a bar, areas to socialise and people to mingle with. Yes there will be people who already know each other but there is a high chance they didn't before going. If you go ask the staff for a tour and see where people socialise and join in.

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By *ornucopiaMan
over a year ago

Bexley

"Hi which clubs can we go and keep our clothes on please ? Thanks

One problem with 'keeping your clothes on' is that many other participants quite reasonably assume that you haven't taken a shower before entering the fray.

No they don't. There are many clubs where clothes stay on unti some may choose to take them off eg xtasia, the attic, amigos, townhouse, cupids many more "

Nor, of course do people take their clothes off or have showers at pubs or night clubs where the hope of a quick shag in the toilets or behind the dustbins is always high in the hopes of certain attendees!

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By *HaRiFMan
over a year ago

Beyond the shadows.

"My age! I’m scared I’ll be seen as young fresh meat and won’t feel safe, especially as a single woman "

I've not been to all the swinger's clubs in the UK but of the ones I've been too I think you'll most likely be more safer there than a normal night club.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A question for newbies to clubs. What is it that stops you making your first visit to a club?

For us it was the worry that we wouldn't know the protocols. We worried we would stick out as newbies. It wasn't like that at all when we first went inside."

Not having anyone to go with

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

" There are many clubs where clothes stay on unti some may choose to take them off eg xtasia, the attic, amigos, townhouse, cupids many more "

Cupids is dress down on arrival

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"As a single guy my first visit was a bit nerve wracking:

Lastly - I get bored easily. Soo I might take extended breaks from going and just go very Vanilla and have a nice quite drink with friends or stay at home with streams

Sounds like good and honest advice

I think its an opinion, not sure about the advice bit. But we all have our own experiences - we’ve never had a bad night in a Club and have talked with many people

You're a couple though, and clubs are basically, for couples to meet other couples.

I can relate to feeling like an outsider as a solo guy in clubs, witnessing the cliques, and getting bored to the point of leaving early.

Of all the threads you'll read in the forum, about how friendly and welcoming people are (towards single guys), I've yet to meet any of these people in any club (but I've only been to 7)

No they are not. You cant make that assumption about clubs or couples.. we for one arent lookimg for other couples. K

Youre obviously not attending the right club or on the right nights"

Yep, they all say that..…

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For us it was the lack of wanting guys to try it on straight away or for men be too pushy despite no interest being shown from us

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By *layTimeEssexCouple
over a year ago

Stansted

Doesn't stop us but restricts us - so many club events start relatively late and finish early hours or are during days when working. Need some starting at 6/7pm so playing by 8 and can go home at 11

It's tough being old fogeys

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By *ethnmelvCouple
over a year ago

Cardiff

"Doesn't stop us but restricts us - so many club events start relatively late and finish early hours or are during days when working. Need some starting at 6/7pm so playing by 8 and can go home at 11

It's tough being old fogeys

So agree with this!!

We’ve been to 8 Clubs together which were all excellent and M has been to 6 more checking them out and we want to visit 4 of those together.

All Clubs are different, all are interesting, none have ever been threatening, all have been welcoming. Some nights are better than others, but all are way better than a Pub night or a nightclub in our view - give Clubs a try

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve always preferred something more intimate that I can control . I’ve never been a party person or enjoyed night clubs or being around lots of people

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

"Doesn't stop us but restricts us - so many club events start relatively late and finish early hours or are during days when working. Need some starting at 6/7pm so playing by 8 and can go home at 11

It's tough being old fogeys

I like Sundays at Quest 2-11pm.

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By *layTimeEssexCouple
over a year ago

Stansted

That sounds perfect. Not sure where Quest is but guess a long way from us. One or two places near us do have the odd event more daytime. We do like evenings but just start earlier

Lots private parties the same. Arrive 9 onwards and nobody starts playing until 11. Just start at 7

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By *HaRiFMan
over a year ago

Beyond the shadows.

"A question for newbies to clubs. What is it that stops you making your first visit to a club?

For us it was the worry that we wouldn't know the protocols. We worried we would stick out as newbies. It wasn't like that at all when we first went inside.

Not having anyone to go with"

Most clubs let you know the rules and show you around. Lot of people go on their own.

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By *elkieWoman
over a year ago

Durham

"That sounds perfect. Not sure where Quest is but guess a long way from us. One or two places near us do have the odd event more daytime. We do like evenings but just start earlier

Lots private parties the same. Arrive 9 onwards and nobody starts playing until 11. Just start at 7

My partner and I have a running joke about earlier orgies. I love the club scene, but why does nobody ever need to get to bed at a sensible hour?

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By *arciocialWoman
over a year ago

Leicester

"Doesn't stop us but restricts us - so many club events start relatively late and finish early hours or are during days when working. Need some starting at 6/7pm so playing by 8 and can go home at 11

It's tough being old fogeys

I'm trying to think of a club like that and I can't. This way clubs are open all day or at 7 and if a club has a host in for an event then it doesn't mean you can't go before that time. I've gone to chams early before and left before midnight. The start and finish times are for guidance I guess, you can arrive and leave when you wish.

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By *layTimeEssexCouple
over a year ago

Stansted

"Doesn't stop us but restricts us - so many club events start relatively late and finish early hours or are during days when working. Need some starting at 6/7pm so playing by 8 and can go home at 11

It's tough being old fogeys

I think that varies club to club but lots are not like that and if you go early might be few around. Chams is one of past favourites but long way from us now. Wish it was closer.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nerves have always stopped me from going. I have thought about going to chams in Newport many time but always push myself away. As I get nervous around big crowds. So I would ideally like to go with someone I know to help me feel more comfortable

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By *iscreetfuncpl12Couple
over a year ago

Somerset

We have visited a number of clubs and always had a good time, despite some of them not being to our taste, because we were with each other. For those who lack confidence, especially couples, just go. What’s the worst that could happen? Single men; you probably won’t get laid but you will know what the inside of a swinging club looks like and that’s a life experience, albeit an expensive one, worth having. Most of our club visits have not resulted in us playing with others but we still, at the very least, had a dance and something to look back on and laugh about, and sex with each other. We rarely visit clubs but when we do, make it part of a night away in a nice hotel with some culture thrown in, so even if the club’s not great, our weekend was.

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By *anya111TV/TS
over a year ago

worcestershire

Being a XD there doesn’t seem to be a membership section for us girls like me.

Some do but most don’t.

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By *etWetWet453Couple
over a year ago

CAMBERLEY

"We've been concerned that a place might be too full-on for Hannah's comfort. We don't want to be confronted by people having sex at every turn. We want to be able to dip into that side of things when we want to and remove ourselves completely when we want a bit of space. "

This is a misconception that most people from vanilla world have - that it is going to be like a scene from I Caligula. Nothing could be further from the truth. When you go into one of these clubs most people are just stood around, in various stages of dress or undress, chatting. People often say that such and such a club is cliquey. That is not necessarily the case. It may be that people have gone with a group of friends or that they have been going so often that they know a lot of people and not unnaturally one gravitates towards people that one knows. When we see people who are so obviously Newbies we make a point of going up to them and engaging them on conversation .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've been a few times with an old fwb a good while back.

I'd never go as a single bloke.

They're cliquey.

Expensive, especially as a single bloke.

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By *etWetWet453Couple
over a year ago

CAMBERLEY

They're cliquey.

See last part of our thread just above yours for our perspective.

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

They're cliquey.

See last part of our thread just above yours for our perspective. "

Does that include single guys, given that your profile is geared away from them?

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By *ethnmelvCouple
over a year ago

Cardiff

Spot on

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By *arciocialWoman
over a year ago

Leicester

"I've been a few times with an old fwb a good while back.

I'd never go as a single bloke.

They're cliquey.

Expensive, especially as a single bloke.

Do you pretend to be a couple once in then? Because when I go it's mainly single men I'm looking for.

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By *HaRiFMan
over a year ago

Beyond the shadows.

[Removed by poster at 24/08/22 19:29:53]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Goo as a single and not knowing why to do , normal is go to the bar and order a drink . Is it like that?….

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By *HaRiFMan
over a year ago

Beyond the shadows.

"Goo as a single and not knowing why to do , normal is go to the bar and order a drink . Is it like that?…."

It can be.

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By *eandmrsjones69Couple
over a year ago

Middle England

Just really curious as to how people define or say a club is cliquey; given that no two nights are ever the same.

We only started out at clubs about a year ago. First night we didn't know what to expect. We've been to other clubs since and never ever felt out of place.

We don't go with any ideas of what might happen as every time is different and we never plan things in advance (although I'm sure others may do).

We aren't the most forward but a chance hello at the bar or a 'do you come here often?' usually breaks the ice.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've been a few times with an old fwb a good while back.

I'd never go as a single bloke.

They're cliquey.

Expensive, especially as a single bloke.

Do you pretend to be a couple once in then? Because when I go it's mainly single men I'm looking for. "

I've only ever gone as a couple so I didn't pretend to be a couple, we were one.

You're 1 woman with the pick of the single blokes. It's Fab all over again regarding it being a numbers game. No thanks. I've also seen how SOME single blokes behave in clubs. Not all obviously, but a sizable percentage are morons. Although I'm 100% confident in my etiquette, however I'm not being lumped in with them just because of my gender.

And I'll address the 'they're cliquey' comment as that always gets the biggest reaction. Funny that. I wonder why?

So when I've been to a club, only 4 times, I went with a fwb. She was very gregarious, outgoing, would talk to anyone. I'm more reserved to begin with, but quietly confident, I certainly didn't have her personality for people schmoozing though. Because of her personality I ended up in the cliques by default, which made me a little uncomfortable, as I've always been an outsider and I like being an outsider.

Within those cliques, I heard bitching, people looking down their noses at others, people being two faced, single blokes being seeing less worthy and I even overheard the owner of one of the clubs taking the piss out of a trans customer one time.

Please don't misconstrue me. Clearly not everyone was like this and a lot of people were lovely, but there was definitely a 2 tier class system. 'Cool kids and the not so cool kids.' And I saw and heard enough from enough people to not go back, and after 7 or 8 years I still haven't.

Just my observations and opinions. Your experiences maybe completely different to mine though.

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By *eandmrsjones69Couple
over a year ago

Middle England

"I've been a few times with an old fwb a good while back.

I'd never go as a single bloke.

They're cliquey.

Expensive, especially as a single bloke.

Do you pretend to be a couple once in then? Because when I go it's mainly single men I'm looking for.

I've only ever gone as a couple so I didn't pretend to be a couple, we were one.

And I'll address the 'they're cliquey' comment as that always gets the biggest reaction. Funny that. I wonder why?

Just my observations and opinions. Your experiences maybe completely different to mine though.

Obviously not for you. Strange that we prefer to go out on a Friday night specifically as there are single men there. As do many other couples.

At 60yrs old certainly wouldn't class ourselves as the 'cool kids'

People will be people, don't think bitching in swing clubs would be any different at a regular night club or in the work place or anywhere else for that matter.

It's not my role to be an advocate for clubs. We enjoy them and take it on board that it's not for everyone. Even though the stock answer we see posted on here for those looking to meet people is 'go to a club'!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've been a few times with an old fwb a good while back.

I'd never go as a single bloke.

They're cliquey.

Expensive, especially as a single bloke.

Do you pretend to be a couple once in then? Because when I go it's mainly single men I'm looking for.

I've only ever gone as a couple so I didn't pretend to be a couple, we were one.

And I'll address the 'they're cliquey' comment as that always gets the biggest reaction. Funny that. I wonder why?

Just my observations and opinions. Your experiences maybe completely different to mine though.

Obviously not for you. Strange that we prefer to go out on a Friday night specifically as there are single men there. As do many other couples.

At 60yrs old certainly wouldn't class ourselves as the 'cool kids'

People will be people, don't think bitching in swing clubs would be any different at a regular night club or in the work place or anywhere else for that matter.

You're right, obviously not for me. Comments like that just reaffirm my belief. But thanks for letting me know what is or isn't right for me

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By *eandmrsjones69Couple
over a year ago

Middle England

"You're right, obviously not for me. Comments like that just reaffirm my belief. But thanks for letting me know what is or isn't right for me

The fact you said you'd not been back in 8yrs and seem like no intentions hence my colloquial response is that you are not interested in visiting a club again.

Not sure how you can say my comment was a reaffirmation. I told you my views just as you had stated yours. I wasn't saying what is right or wrong for you; you'd done that yourself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I used to go to the clubs but haven't been for a while. My observations were that these clubs largely cater for couples looking for other couples, and for the single men like me the competition is fierce. The single man has to be exceptional to stand a chance. I did from time to time go with a lady who was new and the dynamic was very different. I nearly had sex with not just my Indian lady but also with her single Bangladeshi woman friend!! ?? "
clubs are not always about sex it's just nice to go & mix with other people socially

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By *etiton45Man
over a year ago

Basildon

Yearly membership mainly.

Secondly lack of drinks partner can have

Thirdly price of booze if sold on site

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By *etiton45Man
over a year ago

Basildon

Not having a fem to join me is another reason I won't pay single guy charges end off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You're right, obviously not for me. Comments like that just reaffirm my belief. But thanks for letting me know what is or isn't right for me

The fact you said you'd not been back in 8yrs and seem like no intentions hence my colloquial response is that you are not interested in visiting a club again.

Not sure how you can say my comment was a reaffirmation. I told you my views just as you had stated yours. I wasn't saying what is right or wrong for you; you'd done that yourself."

Okay I don't like them because they're cliquey, which they are. Expensive, especially for single blokes, which they are. And they're not really geared up for single blokes in terms they're at the bottom of the pecking order, which they are. Which is absolutely fine as well. It's always a choice to go or not. Those 3 points are my original points why I don't go to clubs, which was what the original post was about wasnt it? But for some reason I'm being questioned on my reasons by a single women and couples where clubs are specifically catered for them. You're seeing the club experience from your eyes as a couple or single women. Erm you know, the cliques!

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By *ethnmelvCouple
over a year ago

Cardiff

So M has been to 6 Clubs on his own, he travels more than me so checks out possible locations. He doesn’t play, but does talk to Couples, single girls and single guys. He has thoroughly enjoyed each of the visits in that they compare much more favourably than going to a Pub. People actually talk to you & the potential is there to play.

Not for everyone, but we have had great times & no we don’t always play with others when we go, sometimes it is just a very erotic evening for us that turns us on

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By *arciocialWoman
over a year ago

Leicester

"You're right, obviously not for me. Comments like that just reaffirm my belief. But thanks for letting me know what is or isn't right for me

The fact you said you'd not been back in 8yrs and seem like no intentions hence my colloquial response is that you are not interested in visiting a club again.

Not sure how you can say my comment was a reaffirmation. I told you my views just as you had stated yours. I wasn't saying what is right or wrong for you; you'd done that yourself.

Guess men must be in the "cliques" (group of people who know each other or talk) because like pointed out people go on a Friday for single men so hardly at the bottom of the pecking order on those nights.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You're right, obviously not for me. Comments like that just reaffirm my belief. But thanks for letting me know what is or isn't right for me

The fact you said you'd not been back in 8yrs and seem like no intentions hence my colloquial response is that you are not interested in visiting a club again.

Not sure how you can say my comment was a reaffirmation. I told you my views just as you had stated yours. I wasn't saying what is right or wrong for you; you'd done that yourself.

The entry prices suggest otherwise. And yeah, the men might be in there cliques too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You're right, obviously not for me. Comments like that just reaffirm my belief. But thanks for letting me know what is or isn't right for me

The fact you said you'd not been back in 8yrs and seem like no intentions hence my colloquial response is that you are not interested in visiting a club again.

Not sure how you can say my comment was a reaffirmation. I told you my views just as you had stated yours. I wasn't saying what is right or wrong for you; you'd done that yourself.

The entry prices suggest otherwise. And yeah, the men might be in there cliques too."

Their*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You're right, obviously not for me. Comments like that just reaffirm my belief. But thanks for letting me know what is or isn't right for me

The fact you said you'd not been back in 8yrs and seem like no intentions hence my colloquial response is that you are not interested in visiting a club again.

Not sure how you can say my comment was a reaffirmation. I told you my views just as you had stated yours. I wasn't saying what is right or wrong for you; you'd done that yourself.

The entry prices suggest otherwise. And yeah, the men might be in there cliques too.

Their*"

My reasons for not going are my reasons. Why is that an issue for some people? Wasn't what this thread is initially about. What stops people going to clubs?

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By *omerset tvTV/TS
over a year ago

Weston-super-Mare

I went to a club on my own within 2 weeks of first joinin fab but i was in male mode as the club wudnt let tvs in. I thought jump straight in feet first i didnt no a single person there out of about 120 people lol. Had 1 of best nights ever in fab i dont believe in just sitting there looking lost so i went round lots of people speaking to them and ended up being invitied in to join a couple of couples

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I went to a club on my own within 2 weeks of first joinin fab but i was in male mode as the club wudnt let tvs in. I thought jump straight in feet first i didnt no a single person there out of about 120 people lol. Had 1 of best nights ever in fab i dont believe in just sitting there looking lost so i went round lots of people speaking to them and ended up being invitied in to join a couple of couples

Genuinely glad you had a great time. Without wanting to make assumptions, but going off from what you say, you're personality comes across as very outgoing, which would make it easier in those situations. I'm a little more reserved initially, so I don't just tend to talk to people I don't know.

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By *nA - TGirlTV/TS
over a year ago

The Sunshine

Hmmmmm

Interesting read.

I’ve been to a few of the more well known Clubs. It’s pretty daunting as a Trans person. I have had all sorts of trouble from all sorts of people in my life whilst socialising. Bars. Clubs. Etc. I’ve been attacked a couple of times. Threatened a lot. Verbally abused regularly.

But. Things are getting better. And. I’ve found Swingers Clubs to be open minded and accepting. (On the whole). There are exceptions of course.

My point, and sorry for the rambling thoughts of a T Human is that

Once I’m in a Club and I feel comfortable - I just get on with it. I sit and watch. And go and chat. And laugh. And join in. And invariably have a great time. I don’t notice cliques because I just go and sit in the middle of them.

I would encourage anyone to go. The people watching and social possibilities are amazing. And anything more is a bonus.

Life is too short. I’m reminded of that a lot unfortunately. So go. Try it. Now.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hmmmmm

Interesting read.

But. Things are getting better. And. I’ve found Swingers Clubs to be open minded and accepting. (On the whole). There are exceptions of course.

My point, and sorry for the rambling thoughts of a T Human is that

I would encourage anyone to go. The people watching and social possibilities are amazing. And anything more is a bonus.

Life is too short. I’m reminded of that a lot unfortunately. So go. Try it. Now.

It's great that people of all walks of life can feel comfortable in those surroundings.

My personality doesn't allow me to be that forward with groups of people, so as a single bloke and with the way I am as a person, I wouldn't be comfortable personally.

Clubs are cliquey. And yes as people have pointed out, cliques exist everywhere. However I'm very used going to a pub, nightclub, work, the football, or wherever. Swinging clubs are a whole different thing, so with added stress of having to break the cliques, it's not for me.

And we're missing the point of this thread. It's not do you enjoy clubs? It's why wouldn't you go to a club? And bizarrely, my reasons for not going are being questioned as if my reasons which are personal to me are wrong.

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By *nA - TGirlTV/TS
over a year ago

The Sunshine

Each to their own of course. I’m just saying that if you can’t cope with the pressure of trying to be sociable in a Swingers Club - then it’s obviously not for you.

But I and many others I’ve spoken to find them very relaxed and much easier to socialise in than many other life options. I’m just trying to encourage people to go and try as I think on the whole once you go you’ll love it.

Love to all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Each to their own of course. I’m just saying that if you can’t cope with the pressure of trying to be sociable in a Swingers Club - then it’s obviously not for you.

Love to all.

I've been to clubs a few times as stated in my previous comments. And I may again one day but only as couple, never as a single bloke. Which what my initial post was about. I then listed 3 reasons as to why. Then I don't know why, I'm being questioned on those reasons.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 24/08/22 23:21:43]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Youd me more than welcome to attend Chams in Newport with us, we are regulars.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hey

For us its the dress down element of a club. Most of the clubs in the North west/North East area are dress down. We like to get dressed up for the night and look good, don't want to get there and strip off

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By *eandmrsjones69Couple
over a year ago

Middle England

[Removed by poster at 25/08/22 06:23:28]

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By *aughtycp1 OP Couple
over a year ago

Leicestershire

"Hey

xx"

I totally understand this. We love dressing up to go to our favourite club Liberty Elite

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"A question for newbies to clubs. What is it that stops you making your first visit to a club?

For us it was the worry that we wouldn't know the protocols. We worried we would stick out as newbies. It wasn't like that at all when we first went inside."

It’s the best part of 2 hours travel to get to one.

Rarely any single women in.

Lukewarm reception for being a single guy.

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

"Hey

xx"

Both Quest and Pandora's Leeds you can stay dressed in the bar

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By *eandmrsjones69Couple
over a year ago

Middle England

"Hey

I totally understand this. We love dressing up to go to our favourite club Liberty Elite "

Guess we are fortunate that we have the best of both as of the two clubs we prefer to go to one is dress down and the other is dress up; happy days!

Heard good things about Liberty Elite so hopefully will get there one day.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would stand in my underwear in a swingers club and talk to like minded people with something in common. Than stand in a normal pub or club fully dressed trying to strike up conversation with nothing to go on.

Swingers clubs make me feel at ease like I have found somewhere that I belong.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Clubs are rubbish. As a single guy you get treated like crap. They want your high entrance fee but not you. Clubs i have found are not equal for men. The ratios of men to women are never fair, need a club that lets men have the pic of women for a change instead of always the other way around.

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By *itzimadCouple
over a year ago

harwich

our experience

all clubs are different so going to one and then saying clubs are no good is ridiculous

everywhere is cliquey even your local pub people talk to those they already know you need to go several times to become part of anything social

clubs are different swing clubs cover a wide spectrum and even at the same venue can be totally different on different night dont turn up at a blackmans fan club and expect not to meet blackmen or a couples only night when really you want to shag seven guys

do your research theres reviews of all the major clubs here and around the web

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hey

xx"

Neither club play or infusions in Blackpool are dress down clubs

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By *itzimadCouple
over a year ago

harwich

reading above about the dress up dress down question my wife hated sauna type clubs as she couldnt see the point of going out looking glam and sitting in a jacuzzi

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By *etWetWet453Couple
over a year ago

CAMBERLEY

Yes it does. Although our profile states not looking for single guys, the operative word is “Looking”. We will and do play with single guys at clubs and parties if the situation and circumstances are right. However we are not specifically looking to Meet single guys.

They're cliquey.

See last part of our thread just above yours for our perspective.

Does that include single guys, given that your profile is geared away from them?"

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"I would stand in my underwear in a swingers club and talk to like minded people with something in common. Than stand in a normal pub or club fully dressed trying to strike up conversation with nothing to go on.

Swingers clubs make me feel at ease like I have found somewhere that I belong.

There’s no better ‘club’ than the rugby family. I’ve travelled all around the North West and North East, chatting to complete strangers in the stands and the bar, sharing a common interest, and always in good humour. I always feel welcome in a rugby club, whereas there’s always a feeling of mistrust being a single guy in a swinger club….

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By *eandmrsjones69Couple
over a year ago

Middle England

[Removed by poster at 25/08/22 09:14:01]

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By *elkieWoman
over a year ago

Durham

Swingers clubs make me feel at ease like I have found somewhere that I belong.

Honestly? If in seven clubs you have felt this way in all of them, the problem is likely with you, not the club. I reckon you’re going in expecting to have a hard time - or hoping to get the warm welcome you get in a rugby club, and being disappointed because NOBODY welcomes like the rugby family do - and people are picking up on that?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If it’s a couples only night we don’t bother.

We like the single guys being allowed in.

Some single guys don’t know what to expect or how to behave appropriately sure but enough do.

Wheat from the chaff and all that.

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

Swingers clubs make me feel at ease like I have found somewhere that I belong.

Not every time, and not in all of them. I went to Club f 5 times, and three of those were some of my best clubs experiences as a single guy! But two nights it felt like I was wearing Harry Potter’s cloak of invisibility. It all depends on who is in when you are, as you only need one person to chat with, to feel included. I can generally last about two hours in my own company, so if I’m not feeling any interest from others (catching eyes, reading body language, etc), I’m out of there.

I can’t help comparing to visiting as a couple though, when it’s always been a positive night, and I’m the same person by myself, or in the company of a female…

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By *arciocialWoman
over a year ago

Leicester

"If it’s a couples only night we don’t bother.

We like the single guys being allowed in.

Some single guys don’t know what to expect or how to behave appropriately sure but enough do.

Wheat from the chaff and all that. "

The same can be said for couples and females not behaving appropriately. Other than some men following people I've never seen any other poor behaviour from men. But abuse, arguments, touching without asking etc has been seen from couples and females.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If it’s a couples only night we don’t bother.

We like the single guys being allowed in.

Some single guys don’t know what to expect or how to behave appropriately sure but enough do.

Wheat from the chaff and all that.

Most of the pissed up antics that we’ve witnessed have been from couples.

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By *eandmrsjones69Couple
over a year ago

Middle England

"If it’s a couples only night we don’t bother.

We like the single guys being allowed in.

Some single guys don’t know what to expect or how to behave appropriately sure but enough do.

Wheat from the chaff and all that.

Most of the pissed up antics that we’ve witnessed have been from couples. "

With so many couples liking the single guys can't understand how come they aren't feeling the love (so to speak)

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By *aughtyxButNiceMan
over a year ago

Chatham

I’m a regular at the clubs and it’s about the Social side for me

Yes it’s lovely to play but if it happens it happens

See so many go to clubs thinking it’s a swingers club so everyone is playing

And it’s not like that really

Iv meet some really nice ladies and couples that have become good friends with and not even played with them

I just feel so comfortable and can be myself

If I have to have One Moan is the price of single blokes

But tbh if it was cheaper probably be 100s of single/not so single blokes

Which is the case with most blokes not getting it at home so go to the clubs

But being a single bloke I look forward to the clubs weekends

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By *he fab twoCouple
over a year ago

brentwood

"My age! I’m scared I’ll be seen as young fresh meat and won’t feel safe, especially as a single woman

What club is that

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By *he fab twoCouple
over a year ago

brentwood

Everyone should experience a club at least once but don’t go with expectations, think of it as a night out the same way you would going to a pub, bar or night club for a drink and a laugh and joke, if you happen to meet people you click with and something happens then great!

The atmosphere is electric in these places and packed with sexy people just like us who all like the same thing!

My wife doesn’t swing but we go to clubs and normally play together while there, I love just being amongst it all.

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By *he fab twoCouple
over a year ago

brentwood

"A question for newbies to clubs. What is it that stops you making your first visit to a club?

For us it was the worry that we wouldn't know the protocols. We worried we would stick out as newbies. It wasn't like that at all when we first went inside.

Not having anyone to go with"

Surely there would be a que of men offering to escort you to a club and even pay for a hotel room for the night and drive you to and throw of you asked the question on fab?

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By *he fab twoCouple
over a year ago

brentwood

"For us it was the lack of wanting guys to try it on straight away or for men be too pushy despite no interest being shown from us"

Tbh even tho my wife don’t play I’m surprised that she never gets chatted up either you’d think guys would be trying to talk to us, maybe the single men want us to go to them?

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By *he fab twoCouple
over a year ago

brentwood

"Doesn't stop us but restricts us - so many club events start relatively late and finish early hours or are during days when working. Need some starting at 6/7pm so playing by 8 and can go home at 11

It's tough being old fogeys

So agree with this!!

Also agree we are not massive late night people and also why do they only play rave music to a audience mainly in there 40/50/60s

We’ve been to 8 Clubs together which were all excellent and M has been to 6 more checking them out and we want to visit 4 of those together.

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By *JohnMan
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

""Not having anyone to go with"

Surely there would be a que of men offering to escort you to a club and even pay for a hotel room for the night and drive you to and throw of you asked the question on fab? "

If I was a woman, there is no way I would go to a club with a man I didn't know and trust. No way I would be dependent on a stranger for getting home. And absolutely no chance of sharing a hotel room with him.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

""Not having anyone to go with"

Surely there would be a que of men offering to escort you to a club and even pay for a hotel room for the night and drive you to and throw of you asked the question on fab?

Why not? Not all men are monsters. So its ok for a guy to go to hotels etc with a strange women but not a women to go with a strange guy? Not much equality in that.

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By *woforfun 1000Couple
over a year ago

surrey

""Not having anyone to go with"

Surely there would be a que of men offering to escort you to a club and even pay for a hotel room for the night and drive you to and throw of you asked the question on fab?

Why not? Not all men are monsters. So its ok for a guy to go to hotels etc with a strange women but not a women to go with a strange guy? Not much equality in that."

Is this a serious reply! Honestly what a bad comment to make! Not all guys are monsters no but some are and it’s a much bigger risk for a women to make than a guy surely! There is no equality to question when it comes to safety!

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By *eeliciouschaosWoman
over a year ago

Wherever

""Not having anyone to go with"

Surely there would be a que of men offering to escort you to a club and even pay for a hotel room for the night and drive you to and throw of you asked the question on fab?

I agree

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

""Not having anyone to go with"

Surely there would be a que of men offering to escort you to a club and even pay for a hotel room for the night and drive you to and throw of you asked the question on fab?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everyone who has been to a club has had that first nervous visit lol just be yourself and try and mingle with other people, you will enjoy a great social night and maybe more x the more you put in the more you will get from clubs x

I totally recommend Monkey Business in Wickford, great social club with always a good crowd and the hosts always make sure everyone fits in xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We are fairly new to scene and really having fun clubs we still haven't had the balls to go yet but we want to badly.nerves

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agree immensely, clubs are places of freedom … each person has privacy if they so wish ,

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By *atenaWoman
over a year ago

Hyde

"Covid and fuel/accommodation costs. "

You have townhouse on your doorstep.... lucky!!!!

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By *ollyPlantxxCouple
over a year ago

bishops storrford

We are off for our first club night tomorrow- equally excited and nervous- will post our view on Sunday xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A question for newbies to clubs. What is it that stops you making your first visit to a club?

For us it was the worry that we wouldn't know the protocols. We worried we would stick out as newbies. It wasn't like that at all when we first went inside.

Not having anyone to go with

Surely there would be a que of men offering to escort you to a club and even pay for a hotel room for the night and drive you to and throw of you asked the question on fab? "

No surprisingly every man I ask isn't into them. Never been, don't want to try. And as soon as I mention anything in a status update I instantly get messages, I wouldn't go to a club again with a new guy, needs to be someone I've got to know and can trust, have a connection with and who also enjoys the scene. There's too many men on here wanting one night stands. And I agree not safe for hotel meets.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Covid and fuel/accommodation costs. "

Townhouse is in your area! I'd love to have that as my local!

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By *lueFireCouple
over a year ago

just somewhere around here

We still go to clubs but, single guys walking around fully dressed wanking in doorways is a massive turn off!

Why should the ladies wear nice outfits and underwear whilst the blokes walk around fully clothed letching? They should have to either be down to their pants, naked or wear a towel!

Also, shuffling wankers should ask permission from the couple/person before they just get their cock out and wank over them.

We just tell them to go away now, unless you make conversation with us we won't give you anytime.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is the reason why lol that do t seem right to me but I genuinely do t no the unwritten rules ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im Guessing My Choice

Being stuck somewhere with Music blasting away

Like a Supermarket or Worse - X-MILES from Home

No Reasonable Opportunity & Unknown people that possibly worse than A-Self (Dope dealers/Burglars +) with Hours to spend

(Single guys wanking at me) both sides their bodies

Same sex company all-day

Someone's Jewelry smashing your gentials

Being bitten

Heavy Smokers (want incurbasticate u)

Meeting people that 'maybe 'Wear Glasses'

Being approached & asked for money/opportunity etc..

Finding you're on video camera after-all

& They've known you way before

& Still never spoken or won't tell

Did I mention paying ??

Is that a Drill lol

Something I can get nextdoor

For £20 I can get someone Rub their Pussy in my face

(Like I wanted xxx) not wait 6 hours -

For an Event plan weeks before

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By *ups777Man
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

I dont drive so i need a partner that drives

open to offer

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By *icplshropsCouple
over a year ago

Rock

For us, it’s the wanking dead. Had one following us upstairs, when we went to view the facilities. Turned to go back down and the line nearly fell back like dominoes!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My age! I’m scared I’ll be seen as young fresh meat and won’t feel safe, especially as a single woman "

Women have all the power in a club - to

Be sure talk to other ladies and they will guide / advise you - everyone was a newbie once - you only go as far as your comfortable with - simple

I’m very new but I found it liberating and exhilarating- I introduced myself as a newbie and was guided gently and gracefully

Trust me - it’s just as hard for newbie men !

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